Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis
by Mikril-dey
Summary: AU:(SR) To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord’s new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted
1. The Golden tongued Moonchild

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: PG-13

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, implied non-con, lime (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, drama

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others. But when I take over the world... muahahahaha.

Chapter 1: The Golden-tongued Moonchild 

Whimpering, three black robed men stumbled out of the Dark Lord's study. One was blubbering, spewing incoherent words at the floor as he nearly rammed into Sirius Black. If he concentrated, Sirius could see a dim crimson residue of _Crucio_ on the man's fingers. Voldemort was not in a good mood.

He exchanged a glance with Lucius Malfoy. The dim hallway around them seem to grow darker as the three tortured Death Eaters pushed past the door at the far end of the hall.

"Shall we come back later, Malfoy?" Sirius suggested. The blond man snorted.

"He may be angry at your sluggishness, Black, in which case he'll have your dog hide replace his rug if we arrive even later."

There was no bite behind the retort, and Sirius knew that Malfoy was just as scared as he was. Still, he had to sink his teeth into his tongue to keep his words civil. "Can't be, one of those three was Avery. I heard that the raid went badly last night."

Fate had, in a stroke of mischievous genius that would've made a marauder proud, paired Sirius Black with his second most hated enemy from school under Voldemort's rule. Neither had allowed their mutual hatred to dwindle, but for working purposes, it was better to keep a cool mask in place.

Malfoy snorted. "Our lord doesn't need an excuse to torture people, it is almost becoming an addiction."

"Like yours with the mirror, I see," Sirius couldn't resist. "I never see you without one."

"Better than _your_ addiction, Black," Malfoy said coldly. "At least mine is obtainable." The edge of Sirius' lips tightened at that. The git had no bloody right to-

"Gentlemen, kindly remove yourself from the hallway," the Dark Lord's deceptively silky voice interrupted him. "And Lucius, watch your tongue before my so-called _addiction_ acts up."

They both swallowed. Sirius had to give Malfoy some credit. The blond wizard opened Voldemort's door without hesitation and bowed in silence. Taking a deep breath, Sirius followed suit.

One would expect Voldemort's personal study to be a dank and dreary place, with iron maidens and diagrams of Chinese water torture hanging on the walls, but even the Dark Lord can surprise you. He kept a cheery fire on the hearth, and blue velvet armchairs with ebony armrests littered the room. A dark blue carpet sprinkled with stars sat beneath their feet, and the walls and ceiling were charmed to resemble the night sky, no doubt a fondness on Voldemort's part of the old ceiling at Hogwarts.

The Dark Lord himself was still a handsome man despite his age, with long hair reaching his shoulders, almost as long and dark as Sirius' was. At Voldemort's gesture, both Death Eaters seated themselves.

"Now, do you know why I summoned the two of you?" The Dark Lord said easily. He tucked a few strands of loose hair behind an ear and leaned back in his chair. Lately, Voldemort had became crueler and darker, almost as if each Daily Prophet headline calling him evil made him more so. Outwardly, however, he was still as pleasant as ever. Polite, gentlemanly, and as welcomed amongst ladies as fifteen years ago.

"Well," Sirius replied cheerfully. "That may have something to do with the fact that we're your top two followers." Indeed, it had been seven long years since he graduated from Hogwarts with top grades, and he had only risen in the Dark Lord's rank. He was an unbeatable dueler, and had never failed his lord in a single mission.

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Could it be the pyre builders allying themselves to Dumbledore, my Lord?"

Ah, of course, the pyrelings in east Africa were a group of native wizards and witches that had taken to breeding phoenixes. Through countless centuries of ancient tradition, their powers were uniquely tied to the life cycle of the those flame-like birds. They are natural healers, and specialize in spells of fire and conjuration. To be sure, they are a lethal foe.

"My lord, we are never going to break this stalemate by making more alliances," Sirius drawled. "When we recruited the dementors, the Order went for the giants. We have an army of violent dark creatures, they got themselves help from the veelas and elves. Now that we've got the draconians, they reach down to east Africa for the pyrelings."

"Precisely," Voldemort clapped once and leaned forward. "We are even equal in raw strength. Where I have the two of you, that old fool has the Potter boy and the werewolf. I need the two of you to break this stalemate. Lucius, you will prepare to leave tomorrow for China. I do not want you to return without the complete support of the Chiyen. You may take a group of wizards with you."

Sirius frowned. The magic users of Asia had a reputation of slow decisions and vague policies. To request complete support was possible, but could take _years_.

"But my wife and son…" Malfoy objected, obviously coming to the same conclusion.

"I'll arrange for Narcissa to move to a house closer to Sirius, and he will look after your family while you are gone." The Dark Lord's voice held no room for argument. "They are cousins, after all."

Sirius cursed his blood.

"That's what I am afraid of, my lord, Black can barely keep himself alive, let alone look after the safety of others,"

"My lord, you know that _I_ may end up killing his son out of annoyance," Sirius raked back black hair, and promptly propped his leg on Voldemort's table. He had only seen Lucius Malfoy's son once before, and had not been left with a good impression. The Dark Lord's eyebrow twitched in amusement.

"Then you should see to it that the agreements are reached quickly, Lucius."

Knowing better than to argue, Malfoy merely bowed with a muttered "Yes my lord," and left the room angrily. As the door clicked shut, Voldemort turned to his third in command.

"Your task, Sirius, is to eliminate one of our oppositions."

"Opposition?" Sirius echoed, feeling a heavy weight settle over his heart. There was something in the dark wizard's voice that he did not like. He straightened himself. "Who is it, my lord?"

Instead of answering, Voldemort swerved in his chair to stare out at the night sky. Sirius felt a chill as he saw that the moon was framed perfectly in the window. As usual, his eyes started to sting, and his breath hitched.

"It has come to my attention that we will be presented an opportunity that we cannot avoid, in two week's time."

But… full moon is in two weeks.

Silence. Sirius closed his eyes briefly as a massive wave of memories enveloped him. Sad, haunted hazel eyes that turned golden with the waxing of the moon. A warm, vulnerable body against his. The sound of shy laughter beside his ears. Sirius' fingers tightened around the wooden handle of the chair.

"Our target is Dumbledore's pet werewolf and ambassador. The key at the heart of many of his greatest alliances. Remus Jeremy Lupin."

Sirius' feet clattered off the table and he was standing in a moment. His blue eyes almost glowed in the warm light of the fire. How _dare_ he!

"Do you know what they are calling him?" Voldemort continued idly, seemingly oblivious of his follower's rage. "The golden-tongued moonchild. It is truly amazing what a pretty face can do for you in this age. The pyrelings absolutely adore him and the giants think he is some sort of divine being."

"My Lord!" Sirius gritted his teeth. "I must protest. Do you not remember what I was promised when I swore my loyalty to you?"

Voldemort scratched his chin. "Remind me, Sirius. Indeed I had forgotten."

"When the war is finished and the Light crushed," Sirius snarled. "I would be allowed to take the werewolf for myself, no matter the circumstance. My lord, I am not fighting a war that could destroy the only thing I'm fighting for."

The Dark Lord suddenly turned to stare at the younger wizard, eyes dark. "Maybe I do not need the services of one that withholds information from me. Should I trust you, Sirius Black?"

Sirius swallowed his anger with difficulty. "I have served you faithfully and without question, my lord."

"You have never told me that on the night of full moon, the werewolf is left without guards. Do you deny that you knew of this before?"

"No, I don't deny it, my lord, but you have no use for that information. You swore you will not touch the werewolf." Sirius glared back at the dark wizard. He was afraid… oh yes he was frightened by the older wizard with powers he could not begin to understand, but if Voldemort wanted to hurt Remus…

"If we knew this, we could have gotten rid of him years ago." Voldemort's voice was low and dangerous. "I am giving you an ultimatum, Sirius Black. Come up with a plan to eliminate the werewolf on your own terms, or I will. I have heard that Dumbledore plans to draw forces in the ice people from the north by sending Lupin. If that happens, I'll use you to appease the dementors next."

Damned… Malfoy was the plotter… Sirius had no patience for such tedious intricacies. He took a deep breath. "How much time do I have to come up with this… plan?"

"Two weeks, Black," Voldemort leaned back lazily. All traces of danger was gone from his face. "Before the next full moon."

Without bowing, Sirius turned and stormed from the room. At the door, Voldemort's voice stopped him.

"And when we _do_ catch the werewolf, I'll make sure to cast _Crucio_ on him until he is driven mad like the Longbottoms."

Sirius slammed the door behind him. For a moment, he leaned back, trying to shake loose the images that Voldemort's words had conjured. He felt cold.

Remus would remain defiant through the first hour. Longer after any normal man would've started blubbering, Remus would still have glared up at Voldemort through those beautiful, haunted eyes.

But then, Remus might cry… might scream… he would be hurt…

Pain shot through his heart. He had seen the golden haired boy cry too many times. Sirius pressed a hand to his chest. No, there is no way he could ever let Voldemort hurt Remus. He would die before that happened. Even back at Hogswarts, before he had fallen in love, he had promised himself he would always protect the younger boy.

And Sirius Black never broke his promises.

* * *

One Week Later

"Please, Moony? Just this once?"

"Prongs, no. Harry is a good kid, but whenever he's here, the Weasleys insist on having their kids here as well. I swear, the twins are worse than you and Padfoot were in school."

"Then just don't tell them! They don't have to know that Harry's here."

"If your wife could resist torturing me, the secret may be kept, but she can't. You have to find another baby-sitter, Prongs. I still need to fix that hole in my living room."

"It's your fault to begin with, I mean, why did you leave your wand on the table?"

"I left my wand on my _bedroom_ table, with the door and window _locked_. Lily somehow decided it would be funny to connect my fireplace with the floo network, and then gave the twins the password to access my living room fireplace." Remus glared at his friend. "And the twins couldn't _resist_ using my wand when they are still flooing and blew up my fireplace."

"But- but Remus! Can't you let Harry stay with you, and refuse Molly?" James spread his arm, looking every bit the desperate father he was, with glasses pressed against his face and messy black hair sticking in all directions.

Remus shrugged. "Molly I can refuse, but Harry wants them here too, and I can't refuse Harry anything."

To Remus' surprise, James leaped up, raced to the tall mirror near the shoe cabinet, and stared critically at his face.

The werewolf blinked, scratching his head as James inspected every inch of his face. Finally, he asked tearfully. "Moony, Harry and I have the same face… How could you be so mean to me."

With a laugh, Remus pretended to think. "I'm a sucker for green eyes, I can't refuse your wife anything either."

"Really?" James brightened. "I'll go get Lily!"

The werewolf sighed. How could James have forgotten? "No Prongs, don't you remember? Full moon's in a week. I'll be too tired to watch over Harry. I'm sorry, but I can't."

"Oh." For a moment, James was taken aback. He swallowed. "I'm sorry. I should've remembered, but I was just so busy lately and-"

"It's fine. You know? Sometimes even I forget about it. Minerva always has to call me about it." That was a lie, but James looked significantly relieved. He came back and sank into the huge armchair near the demolished fireplace.

There was an awkward silence in the air as Remus sipped at his morning cup of chocolate.

Finally, James spoke up. "Sometimes, I miss Padfoot."

Remus nearly dropped the cup. Nervously, he set his drink down and looked to his friend. "Padfoot is a traitor. He killed millions of innocent muggles. He's a dog of the Dark Lord."

"Yes, keep telling yourself that," James said tiredly. "But really Moony… I never expected Padfoot to turn…"

"We never expected a lot of things from Padfoot," Remus said stiffly. "Never expected him to violently take from another what is not given. Never expected him to hurt Lily and nearly kill Harry. Never expected him to kill Wormtail."

"Moony-" James interrupted. His normally laughing brown eyes were serious. "I know. Don't you think I know? I nearly lost the two most important people to me that day. And I was scared. If I lost Lily and Harry, I don't know what I'd do."

Remus said nothing. James sat down beside him on the couch and closed his eyes. "And I can't imagine what I would do if I was denied the one person I love most in the world, either. If I see Lily before me everyday, but wasn't allowed to be with her, to protect her. I think I would die."

"Would you have joined Voldemort?" Remus asked softly. His eyes had lost its naïve gleam, but not the depth that Sirius once wanted to drown in.

"No, but I am not Padfoot," James said shortly. "He loves you in ways I will never be able to understand."

"Prongs, let's change the subject."

"No, Moony, you need to think about Albus' suggestion. I think it makes sense."

"No, I will not let myself be used like that." There was a catch in the young man's voice. "I'm not going to go against ministry regulation and let him near me again. Once was enough. I don't ever want to live like that again."

"Moony! You _need_ a mate! How many others has Albus suggested to you? You've never given them a second glance, why? Because you're still so fixated on Padfoot that you can't see anything else!"

"I'm _fine_! It isn't if I'm a veela and I'll die without a mate. Prongs, I don't _like_ Padfoot anymore, and he's a traitor. I don't want to become bait for the Light. As much as I love all of you, this isn't something I'd budge on. You- you want me to _parade_ myself in front of him so he'd-"

"Don't be an idiot!" James finally exploded. "Listen, we're not trying to _use_ you! We're trying to help! If you'd just give those other people a chance, Albus wouldn't be worrying his head off! _I_ wouldn't feel bad whenever I leave you alone in this house to go back to my _family_!"

His voice softened. "Poppy told me your injuries are worsening every month. Even Snape's potion doesn't help much anymore. Moon… your werewolf is slowly going insane. It wants a mate… needs one…"

"Prongs… I think you better leave."

"Alright, Moony. Just think about what Albus said, alright? Not the part about Padfoot, but about getting a mate. I'd hate to see you hurt yourself."

"Yeah… I know. I love you too, Prongs."

James suddenly looped an arm around Remus and grinned. "Sorry mate, but my heart already belongs to Lily."

"You bloody prat," Remus laughed and shoved him off the couch. "Get out of here."

* * *

That night

"You have a plan?" Voldemort seemed slightly incredulous. Sirius, now in an extremely good mood, grinned.

"You didn't think I could do it, did you?" Feeling daring, Sirius nudged the Dark Lord, who's eyes flashed with anger, but then cleared. After all, he was intrigued by what the younger wizard could've thought up.

"It seems as though you work better under pressure, Sirius," he smirked. "Very interesting."

Sirius strode ahead of him, and pushed open the huge doors that led to the meeting hall. Immediately, the hall filled with Death Eaters flashed into view. Each was solemn as stone, and wore almost identical expressions of constipation. Sirius took his seat at Voldemort's right in Malfoy's absence.

The Dark Lord, with his usual quiet grandeur, settled into his throne. Due to tradition, his eyes raked through his followers. A collective shiver coursed through the room, and Sirius felt the hair on the back of his neck rise.

Everyone knew; Voldemort during the gatherings was a completely different leader than him in normal life.

"Nott, Avery, report," he barked.

And thus the meeting began.

By the time they reached the subject of Remus J. Lupin, Voldemort had killed one of them and cast _Crucio_ on four. Sirius, even though he was confident in his plan, couldn't help but feel the sick nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach.

_Be strong…_ he told himself. _You've waited for this chance for seven years. You've lusted… wanted… dreamed of Moony for so long… You can't mess up now._

He stood, taking a deep breath. "My lord, I can eliminate Remus J. Lupin. You all know the reasons why I joined these ranks seven years ago. About this time next week, I plan to make my wish a reality."

He paused. Good, everyone was listening.

"There are many things you do not know about the werewolf. First of all, many would assume that in his wolf form, he is male, but," Sirius allowed himself a small smile, "Remus Lupin's transformation is a female wolf."

There were titters across the hall.

"And as such, it has always been my plan to mate with him." Sirius saw some looks of disgust, but decided to ignore them. "As some of you may or may not know, a werewolf can only take one mate, determined through sexual claiming when both mates are in werewolf form. That is why werewolves bite. They seek out those they believe are potential submissive mates and bite them, changing the other into a werewolf, then mating. Once a werewolf is mated, there is no more danger of further biting unless the urge hits them to reproduce.

"Now under normal circumstances, werewolves are forbidden to either mate or reproduce. Under rare circumstances, if both parties are willing and go to the ministry for an appeal, they could gain the permission to mate. It doesn't matter which way you look at it, I will never be a potential mate for Lupin, for I am not the submissive party."

Snickers. This time, Sirius pointed his wand at a black robed figure in the back. "Ganslee, go to Hell. _Ignitem thyren_."

A flicker of flame shot up from the man's robes. The man screamed as the fire licked up his robes. Beside Sirius, the Dark Lord began to chuckle. His eyes glittered as if he was watching some twisted entertainment.

"As I was saying," Sirius began again, ignoring the man rolling off his seat to rid himself of the fire. "I have once gone to a werewolf specialist in Germany, and he put me through a simulation. If I was ever turned into a werewolf, I would definitely be male, and an alpha leader. This means that within our bond, it is Lupin that will be the submissive party."

"Excuse me, Black," a cold voice said from across from him. The man pushed back his hood to reveal a deathly pale complexion and glowing blue eyes. He had black hair that looked as if too much wizard hair products had been used on it. "That piece of trash in the back of the room annoys me. If you would put him out please."

"Why don't you 'put him out' yourself, Snape?" Sirius challenged.

His old school nemesis glared at him for a moment, then promptly turned to utter a spell. The hall grew silent again as the burning man's screams died down. He laid flat against his chair, hair matted down with the burst of water from Snape's wand.

"Thank you," Snape turned back to Sirius with an unreadable look in his eyes. "And please, don't bore us with the disturbed details of werewolf mating, we all know you want Lupin under your control."

Sirius blinked, and a wave of annoyance swept over him. However, Snape was valuable to the Dark side. As much as he wanted to light a fire to his greasy hair, that would not go well with Voldemort.

"If… no, _when_ I bring Lupin back here, I want one thing to be certain." Sirius held his breath. This was the key. If the Dark Lord does not accept his term, there was nothing for it, he would not bring Moony amongst this crowd without securing this promise.

If anything, Voldemort looked slightly amused. "I have only ever heard of werewolves raping humans. For all I know, you are the first human that wants to rape a werewolf. It is amazing you haven't acted upon that urge yet."

Sirius felt a chill. It was as if Voldemort could see straight through him… He cleared his throat. "I want to know if you will allow me one request, my lord."

"Go on."

"I need to know that he will be safe here. No one, not even Malfoy or you, my lord, is to touch him. Approaching him with any intention of harming him in any way will be a violation of this request."

"Granted," the corner of Voldemort's lips twitched in a ghost of a smile. "This may turn out to be _very_ interesting. Most other dark creatures are on our side, after all. That little golden-tongued werewolf should not be an exception."

"He will not be on our side," Sirius warned. "A mating bond does not specify that."

The Dark Lord laughed. "Pity, but that is of little importance."

Sirius sighed in relief. There, the first step of his plan is complete. Now…

"Now I will explain what my plan is. Every full moon, Lupin is held in an underground facility, with so many magical wards in place it is difficult to breath. There is only one moment in which one could use magic. Ten o'clock on the following day when mediwitches and healers are sent in to check for injuries. The magical wards will be down for approximately ten minutes…"

* * *

Midnight

_Albus,_

_Black has gone mad. Lupin's inaction may have led to dire consequences. Since Lupin is not willing to take him for a mate, he is going to force the bond. We need to move Lupin to another location during this full moon, or he will be taken._

_As much as I hate to admit it, Black's plan is nothing short of genius. Although he states that a major part of this undertaking would require me tampering with Lupin's wolfsbane potion, I fear it will go smoothly even if I do not involve myself._

_I will give you the full account at school._

_Severus Snape_

Hastily, Snape rolled the parchment and bound it to a school owl's feet. "Bring this to Albus Dumbledore."

He sighed as the owl took off under the cover of a dark sky. Snape was about to turn around when he heard a sickeningly familiar voice mutter a spell just outside of his window.

"_Stupefy_."

"Black!" He was back at the window in seconds, and he could only watch in horror as his eyes registered the figure on the tree outside.

Sirius Black cradled the stunned owl in one hand while he brandished the letter at him. All the blood rushed from Snape's face, and he held tightly to the window pane to steel himself.

"Snape," Sirius acknowledged coolly. "Late night correspondences can be suspicious."

_Bloody school owls are too recognizable,_ Snape raged. _If I get out of this alive, I'm getting my own._ "Good evening to you too, Black. Tell me, do you have a habit of loitering by windows, perhaps?"

"Go stuff yourself, Snape, I've no patience for your excuses," Sirius snapped. "I know what you are."

Snape's gaze flickered before he donned his impassive mask. "Indeed, Black, what ill conceived notion has gotten to your head this time?"

"You are Dumbledore's spy," Sirius said simply. "I have known since the incident with James five years ago. There is no need to lie to me." Before Snape could come up with a suitable reply, he went on. "Our lord gave me an ultimatum, and now I'm giving you one. Kindly leave your overly large nose out of this one. Mix that muggle tranquilizer with the wolfsbane, hand it to Moony, and your secret is safe with me."

The breath that was held captive in Snape's throat escaped in a rush. He peered suspiciously at Sirius.

"Muggle tranquilizer?" Snape raised an eyebrow. "You are a pureblood wizard, Sirius Black."

"I'm not a potions fanatic, so I don't know what will work. Better be safe with a magic-less ingredient than risk tampering with magic."

"Dare I ask how much time you spent thinking of this?" Snape said dryly. "Black, I will not keep this a secret. Lupin will be warned."

Without warning, a large shape barreled through the window. Snape found himself pressed against a wall with teeth at his throat. Shaggy black hair flew into his eyes and claws dug into his shoulder blades.

He would never leave his wand on his table again.

With difficulty, Snape managed to shove the large dog off him. The grim-like creature tensed, growling at him. Snape swallowed, pressing his palm to his throat, where incisions from the dog's fangs had began to bleed slightly.

"Damned, Black, you better not have rabies. Shouldn't you have fallen out of love by now?"

Sirius' dog form stiffened. What Snape said had struck a deep cord in him. He turned himself back into human. Climbing slowly to his feet, he felt a dead rhythm in the beat of his heart.

Yes… he should've fallen out of love by now, but no matter how long it took, his feelings were as clear as the last time they kissed.

"You know how I feel about the werewolf, Snape. You were there at Hogwarts. Take my advice and make sure this plan of mine works."

* * *

The Night of Full Moon

The pain had already began. As the last of the three doors of his monthly cell slid close, Remus allowed all the exhaustion of his work to overwhelm him. There were muggle lights in the corridor outside his cell, but they never bothered to light his room. The walls were padded, to reduce the damage that may be caused by his urges of self-harm.

Small glass in hand, Remus made his way to the furthest corner. _Here goes nothing…_

Gripping the cup securely, the werewolf tipped the foul, almost smoking drink down his throat. The horrid taste hit him like a truck, and Remus coughed several times before leaning back against the wall.

His legs began to weaken.

Perhaps he was a little _too_ tired. Uncontrollably, his thoughts drifted to Sirius, the only one he'd ever allowed himself to love. Remus grabbed his shoulders tightly, willing himself to forget.

Sirius was evil. He had joined Voldemort. What more proof was needed?

"Padfoot…" Remus whispered. Clenching his teeth, he rubbed his eyes and tried to think of happier thoughts. Being too upset before a full moon caused his transformations to be particularly violent.

"Yes, Moony? What is it?"

Remus froze. For a moment, he thought he had imagined those words, but then, from the darkness, a tall form appeared.

What in the world? Why was someone in here?

Frightened, Remus pressed himself against the wall. He blinked rapidly, trying to recognize the form that seemed so familiar…

"Get away from here. It's not safe," he managed. "I- I'm going to change soon."

"I know that Moony."

In a flash, the figure was before him. Remus felt both his wrists grabbed in a vice-like grip. A hard, rough body pressed against his own. The familiar scent of warmth and seawater stirred the memories in him.

_Padfoot!_ Padfoot… who was a Death Eater.

Remus panicked. He struggled, and felt a leg hook around his foot. He tripped, sprawling forward into his invisible attacker's chest. Hands fell around his waist, pulling him tightly into a warm, dominating embrace.

"Pad- mmmmft-" he gasped.

A pair of lips had descended upon his own. Remus clenched his teeth tightly together as a heated tongue wormed its way past his lips. He jerked his head back in an attempt to escape, but only succeeded in bending backwards as the larger man leaned over him. His muscles stretched at his back. Fruitlessly, Remus gripped his assaulter's shoulders, trying to force him back. Reaching deep within him for that well of furious power that spilled over him every full moon, he shoved.

A hand crept up to his face. His own fists loosened.

_What-_ What was going on? He couldn't touch his werewolf strength. His arms were as weak as an octopus'. He was suffocating… the kiss didn't stop…

Finally, when his head was dizzy with the lack of oxygen, the kiss ended. Remus turned to one side to avoid the next, gasping deeply. The hands tightened around his waist and the werewolf found himself entirely at the mercy of his greatest nightmare.

With eyes now accustomed to the dim lighting, he saw the other wizard from the corner of his eyes. The same piercing gray eyes and sharp gaze.

His waist was released. Remus spared a breath, immediately ducking under the offending arm and dashing away.

But his opponent was faster. A hand grabbed his shoulder and slammed him against the wall, while the other found his chin and turned his face back. There was a predatory gleam in those normally clear, laughing gray eyes.

"I promised you seven years ago, Moony," Sirius whispered. "You will be mine."

And Remus' transformation began.

* * *

Author's Note: Well... that was... long...

Please be gentle, this is the first fanfiction I've followed through on and actually written. If I've messed up any facts, other than the werewolf details. I admit that most of the characters will be a little OOC, since this is AU, but I'm trying to give them a concrete personality that is believable.

I am not entirely happy with this chapter, and some details may be changed later. There _is_ a plot, but the details are very vague, so if you have ideas,I'd be glad to hear them. I am not confident about the rating, so please tell me if I've over or under rated this story. If anyone has a problem with Remus' middle name Jeremy, or if anyone finds out what his actual middle name is... please and thank you?

Anyways, reviews would be nice, although I'm not expecting many for my first story. Also, flames are welcome if you have actually read the chapter and disliked it. However, please also include an alternative choice.

Mikril-dey


	2. The Black veiled Night

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When the Order denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: R for violence and very mild implied non-con (if you are bothered by violence, this is the chapter _not to read_,at least not the first half) hm… didn't think non-con could be mild, but I can't think of another way to describe this.

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, implied non-con, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, drama

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others. But, I'm checking my horoscopes each day to see if I'm getting any luckier…

Chapter 2: The Black-veiled Night 

Sirius' plan was so simple he couldn't believe he had not thought of it sooner. Due to a traditional fear of werewolves, Remus had always been left alone during full moon. No matter what happens behind his locked doors, the doors stayed locked.

Their schedule, too, was simple: spell-springers were brought in the day before full moon to ensure the room was uncontaminated with spells and suspicious magic. For the next full day everyone that came within ten meters of the building were inspected by magic and questioned. Any magic detected during that time would be investigated.

All in all, it was impressive security, but not flawless.

Full moon was Remus' Achilles' heel. It was the one time he was vulnerable.

Sirius had transformed into his dog form half an hour before Remus' arrival. He had dragged a reluctant Narcissa to help him with muggle processes; dyeing and trimming his fur. The wizards at the facility had been on the lookout for black, shaggy dogs and certainly didn't suspect him as he trotted past them, short white fur as immaculate as an angel's robes.

He had been in severe trouble when a witch took a liking to him, scratched his ears and told him firmly to _go home_.

Not wanting to be suspicious, he had whined winningly and laid down by her feet. She, silly young thing she was, had cooed at him, and took him around back to the kitchens, given him a plate of left over cake, _then_ told him to go home.

Sirius didn't, he went in the direction of the front door, but then cut back and found a private spot. There, he waited until he felt the ministry officials cast a spell to investigate some innocent muggle passing through, and transformed back in the exact instant.

Since animagus transformations didn't give off much of a magical signature, no one noticed.

Thus he had managed to sneak into Remus' room.

When the werewolf had walked in, Sirius couldn't help but notice how tired Remus seemed to be. If the bags under those golden eyes were any indication, Snape never needed to tamper with the wolfsbane potion. Remus didn't look like he could summon any werewolf strength even if he wanted to.

Then Remus called his name.

It made Sirius' blood boil. All thoughts of caution was thrown to the wind as he found himself approaching the smaller man. He watched as Remus tried to adjust to the dim lighting, and felt his heart swell.

Seven years…

Damned, all he wanted was to hold him, to fill in the emptiness in his heart. To hell with his whole mating idea. It would've been enough just to have Remus in his arms again. Did his hair still smell slightly sweet? Had he lost weight? Maybe Remus had grown and his head would no longer fit just below his chin…

"Get away from here. It's not safe," Remus' voice was hoarse, almost as if he hadn't spoken in months. "I- I'm going to change soon."

Was this how it is? Was Remus afraid of himself now? Back at Hogwarts, Remus had _known _that he wasn't the dark creature everyone else believed him to be. If Sirius had been around, Remus would never have fallen so far into self-loathing. He swallowed.

"I know that Moony."

He didn't know what came over him. The urge to touch Remus was too strong. Sirius lunged forward blindly, pressing the smaller body against the padded walls. His long fingers closed around small wrists that were painfully familiar. He was distinctly aware that his lips were mere inches away from the werewolve's.

It would've been so easy to just lean down…

Except Remus panicked. Despite being drugged and tired beyond belief, Remus was still strong. Sirius felt a particularly violent kick miss its target and the smaller man sprawled against him. Instinctively, he wrapped his arms around the slender waist and held him close.

Yes… this was what he wanted… this was everything he had dreamed about.

"Pad- mmmmft-"

Oh yes… and the kiss… oh Merlin…

All the blood in his body seemed to shoot towards his groin. Seven years… and no matter how hard he tried, no woman nor man could ever satisfy him. It was always just him and the two pictures of Remus he had salvaged from Hogwarts as he comforted himself in the privacy of his bath.

For one eternity squeezed into a couple seconds, Sirius was in heaven. Or… as close to heaven as he remembered. Remus wasn't letting him in. His tongue met clenched teeth, and there was unwanted tension in the werewolf's shoulders.

Sirius pulled away and watched as that beautiful face sagged sideways, panting. There were worried knots in Remus' tight features. They spoke of years of loneliness and suffering, things that Remus should never have had to go through alone.

Unconsciously, Sirius tightened his hands. There was so much… hurt that needed to be fixed. So many wounds that needed to be licked. Sweet, kind Remus…

Without warning, the anger was upon him again. The Order had its chance! It couldn't give Remus happiness, so it was his turn. Seven years! What in the world had they been doing for seven years! Why hadn't they done something to save this beautiful… beautiful…

Remus ducked under his arm and fled. It barely registered in Sirius' mind that Remus was probably afraid, probably threatened by his sudden appearance.

He was just angry. Why couldn't Remus have given him a chance to begin with?

Grabbing a thin, bony shoulder, Sirius slammed the werewolf against the wall again. Remus' head was downcast. Why wouldn't he look at him! Bloody werewolf!

Jerking the small face up, Sirius felt a thrill as the delicate chin fit perfectly into his palm. "I promised you seven years ago, Moony," he whispered. "You will be mine."

Remus' transformation chose that moment to begin.

* * *

Rated R for violence

When the first wave of bone-twisting, flesh-melting agony hit him, Remus forgot that anything else existed in the world. The first to turn were his legs… paws. It felt as if his kneecaps were bent backwards, snapped, then both halves crushed against each other. His toe was pulled back along the inside edge of his foot, with the intensity of ripping flesh, until it rested halfway up his calf.

He couldn't stand. Remus toppled to one side, harsh breath bubbling against his throat. His fingers gripped at the padded floors, nails sinking deep between the foams. He wanted to scream, but years spent at the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmead had taught him that people became suspicious if they heard human cries.

So he could only bury his face against the ground, grinding his teeth and tucking his head as close to his body as he could.

But then, a warm hand was by his side, pulling him upright. Remus lashed out blindly, only to have his hands caught for the second time that night. This time, though, the other was gentle.

"Moony?" A voice whispered as it leaned down next to him. "Concentrate on my voice. I'm here, alright?"

Remus' back was pulled against Sirius' chest, as his former friend wrapped both arms around him and brought him close. There was a warm breath by his ear, but Remus couldn't quite make out what the low, quiet voice was saying. He arched backwards into the embrace, head bumping painfully into the other man's chin.

Sirius let out a quiet curse. Then, he shifted his attention to the suppressed shivers that ran through the werewolf's body. He positioned his head better, and tried not to think about how much pain Remus must've been going through. Any trace of lustful feelings had been wiped out as soon as the transformation began. He had forgotten, or rather, the intensity of seeing someone he loves in agony had dimmed over the seven years. Sirius wasn't sure he was ready for it. For a moment he laughed off _Crucio_. After all, he _saw_ Remus' shoulder bones pull back along his ribs as the werewolf let out a muffled scream. Tears stung his own eyes as Remus thrashed again.

"Listen to me, Moony, it'll be over soon. I'll still be here…" Sirius' voice trailed off as he realized that the fact he was here probably wasn't a good thing for the werewolf.

Remus breathed with difficulty. It was as if he was a child that had burned his hand, and a mother had taken that same hand and cradled it. The pain was perhaps worsened by body contact, but it would've killed him if Sirius pulled away right then. He wrapped his hand, which was rapidly ripping open to allow for fur growth, around Sirius' arms. He… missed having someone there with him during full moon.

The changes crept like rising water up to his neck. Skin around his throat was stretched taught, wrapping him, suffocating.

Remus choked as a new wave of pain coursed through him. He accidentally bit down hard on his tongue. The hard, clanging taste of blood seeped through his mouth. Heat gathered at his eyes and nose.

Then a hand found its way into his mouth. Remus almost clamped his teeth down in shock.

"Pa-" He tried.

But there didn't seem to be anything remotely sexual behind the action, and Remus really bit down as he felt his internal organs shift inside him. Even Sirius' touch wasn't enough to ease the pain anymore. He tasted blood.

He screamed, just as his voice box split open into the hollow echoing chamber of a wolf's. The sound came out half a piercing howl. The tail… seemed as if the surface of his tail was constructed from the inside walls of his body, until skin stretched over it.

The last stage was long for both of them. Remus dimly noted through the heavy veil of blackness that, although there was the usual taste of blood in his mouth, it wasn't his tongue that was injured. His claws had etched deep into Sirius' arms, but not into his own flesh.

Finally, when the werewolf's transformations were complete, Sirius released his grip and staggered away. He pressed his hand against the hem of his robes, trying to dry off the blood. The cuts from Remus' fangs weren't deep and the bleeding was already slowing, but damned, they hurt. A simple healing spell would have fixed it, but the wards in the room didn't allow it.

Sirius was panting as well by then, and he raised his eyes to the werewolf. Remus had never been particularly large. Even transformed, he was only slightly larger than the average wolf, with gray fur that, under a certain light, had a slight golden shine to it. Though Sirius could never discern the actual color; he only ever saw Remus' wolf form at night. The creature had now backed a certain distance away, watching him with wary golden eyes.

Sirius remained still for a few moments, trying to gather his thoughts. It was time to claim Remus. But that was the part of this plan Sirius had never given much thought to. Werewolves didn't bite anyone stronger than they were, and Sirius had experienced that first hand before. He had been scratched and injured when he'd foolishly followed Remus that one night in fourth year, but never bitten… One sitting, one blowing lightly on his injured hand, the man and wolf kept an intense stare between them.

Surely… he could trick a werewolf. From what he could find out, they were simple creatures during full moon, no matter what their human intelligence was. Surely he could _pretend_ to be submissive long enough for Remus to bite him.

Slowly, Sirius knelt down. Remus tensed, and a low growl emitted from his (or was it her now?) throat. Sirius swallowed. A sudden, idiotic thought struck him. What if that German was wrong? What if, after being bitten, _he_ turned out to be the submissive one?

He'd kill himself, Sirius deftly loosened his collar, exposing his throat. As much as he loved Remus, he can't imagine life controlled by someone else. Slightly shaky fingers folded the robe down. His bleeding hand had left a distinctly dash of red across his neck.

Sirius saw Remus eye his throat and knew he had a chance. He clasped both hands into a fist to stop them from trembling, then slowly reached out to the werewolf. Licking his dry lips, Sirius tried to keep his voice soft.

"Come on, Moony," he whispered. "Bite me." Remus stepped back for a moment at the sound of his voice. Her nose quivered momentarily. This human… he smelled strong…

He also smelled familiar, like home and a time when there was a pack to look out for her and vice versa. The wolf was intrigued and frightened at the same time. She remembered… did she remember? This man was strong, stronger than she was. Not a potential mate.

But it had been so long… Remus' ears flicked in confusion. She wanted… what did she want?

Sirius edged closer. "Moony," he repeated. "Bite me."

_Bite me so I can make you mine…_ Sirius nearly jumped in excitement as the werewolf took a couple cautious steps towards him, sniffing tentatively. He reached further out, palm upwards, the smell of his blood abrasive in the black air. Remus was taking the bait.

Cocking her head to one side, the werewolf touched her wet nose against the side of Sirius' hand almost timidly. Sirius took a deep breath, mindful of the tension still in her tightly coiled body, turned his palm so he could touch the wolf's snout.

Remus lashed out, snarling as if her life depended on it. Her claws left three angry marks by Sirius' thumb. She didn't like her snout touched, not at all… it threatened her, almost as if the human had tried to clamp her mouth shut, robbing her of her most deadly weapon. She didn't like that one bit.

Her nerves were on edge. Paws tingled in reminder; they wanted to be used. Normally, Remus would be trying to rip her own body apart at this point during the night. But now… there was a new target.

Hissing in pain, Sirius drew his hand back. For a brief moment, his eyes narrowed. He'd make sure to take compensation from Remus later on. Holding his breath briefly, Sirius allowed his face to flow back into a loose, passive expression.

_I am not threatening,_ he told himself. _I pose no threat._

When he looked up, the werewolf was gone. With a sudden burst of apprehension, Sirius turned around just in time to see Remus lunge at him from behind. The wolf body crashed into his, a paw pressing hard into his chest.

Fortunately, the muggle tranquilizer seemed to have worked, or else Remus wasn't as strong as Sirius remembered by far. Growling, Sirius pushed the werewolf off him, then rolled so he had her under him again.

"Moony," he snarled. "Bite me." One hand reached out and clamped around Remus' jaws, the other fisted itself in a handful of fine, gray hair.

At that, the werewolf went insane. Yelping, she lashed out repeatedly. What was she to do? What _could_ she do? All her life, she had been left alone on full moons, and when the others were there, there was almost a sort of fearful respect for her. Any wrestling was done only in play, and nobody carried it farther than was desired.

This was different from pain, this fear…

After he calmed his beating heart, Sirius began to curse himself again. Some submissive act he was putting on… Now, it would take a miracle for Remus to bite him. Hardening his resolve, Sirius rolled over again, so that he was on his back with the werewolf atop him. Sirius softened his voice and lied. "Bite me once, and I'll let you go. Just once."

When the werewolf body almost sagged down in relief at being released, Sirius could see Remus in those inhuman golden eyes. For a moment, his eyes softened as he stared at the one he loved, who, even in wolf form, was beautiful. He smiled his most winning smile.

"Moony," he reached up a hand to stroke behind the werewolf's ears. "I love you."

Violent section ends

* * *

If asked to remember, the werewolf Remus would not have been able to tell you what she was thinking when she bit Sirius Black. It was just that… hearing those words brought back every good memory she ever had. The smirk that hung by Sirius' lips whenever they played a particularly nasty trick on the Slytherins or insulted some teacher without them knowing. The gentle, genuine grin that reminded Remus of the sea, so open and all-encompassing that it was.

But the smile Sirius gave him then was yet another kind. The kind Remus had only ever seen Sirius give her after third year, when he realized he was gay and had a crush on her. It was the smile that was given to her after Sirius got her into trouble with Professor McKingslore so they could serve detention together. The one she saw after Sirius tampered with her broomstick so he could 'rescue' her from a ride that wouldn't stop doing the Wronski Feint.

It was an amused smile, with eyes so filled with laughter that it warmed Remus' heart, no matter how angry she was. But there was also an underlying tenderness in it. Almost as if it was saying, 'yes, I love you, but this is way too funny.'

So Remus bit him, without truly understanding why.

And then it was Sirius' turn to hold back screams of agony as he slowly changed forms.

About halfway through, Remus began to have doubts. Sirius was… growing _really_ large. Larger than she could ever hope to be. Remus quickly backed away, guilty about escaping while the other was in pain, but unable to stop herself as Sirius grew… and _grew_.

What was going on? She was supposed to be the sire. She was the original. Sirius was a male as expected, but he wasn't… supposed to be _larger_ than she was.

As the large black werewolf picked himself up from the padded floor onto which he had collapsed, Remus backed away. She fought the urge to whimper; she hadn't whimpered in _years_.

But the other wolf was large, and black as the night. Gray eyes turned to her, and Remus backed up. Dark fur rippled, and the long, elegant tail swept against the dusty, padded floor. Appearance wise, Sirius wasn't that dissimilar to his animagus form, but the black dog was _never_ so intimidating…

Should she try to mate? How could she try to be dominant when the other was just so… _large_. Sirius easily stood two inches taller than her, and as he unwrapped his long body, tail twitching Remus sensed that she was probably an entire head smaller than the other werewolf.

But- she- she was the sire! Tensely, Remus floated closer to the other wolf, trying to establish that _she_ was in control of this bond.

The black wolf, however, obviously had other ideas. Her worse fears were confirmed when Sirius leaped at her. In a flash, Remus knew a mistake had been made. This wasn't allowed… She was supposed to bite someone that was _submissive!_ What… what was she _thinking_ when she bit him? He- he wasn't the submissive at all!

The other wolf was on top of her, and the open scent of seawater washed into her nose. His snout was beside hers, breath hot against her own. This was wrong. It can't happen like this!

So she twisted her neck and snapped at the other wolf, who ducked to the side just in time. The weight wasn't on her anymore, and Remus shot out from under the other wolf. She scrambled away, desperately trying to put as much distance between them. Remus needed to survive this night! This mating was wrong.

The last of the pain had died away, and Sirius' mind felt fuzzy. Instinctively, he drew in a long breath from his wet nostrils. The cold clarity in the air shot through him, and he scrambled to his feet.

Wolf! He was wolf!

And the most beautiful creature he had ever seen was merely several feet away from him. A rounded forehead tapered gracefully into a slender snout, with angry golden orbs that were set deep in her face. With eyes that won a battle over the night, Sirius finally concluded that Remus' fur was, indeed, gray fading to silver, and longer than a werewolf's should be. However, at the tips of each individual hair, there was a tint of gold. Whenever she moved, the fur waved at him, almost winking.

So beautiful… and nobody had ever claimed her.

_So,_ Sirius concluded, _she is mine._

And the chase began.

* * *

Morning came like a sneaky marauder, and neither Sirius nor Remus noticed it. The room had no windows, so even if they did notice the gradual dawn, they wouldn't have been able to watch it.

That was the first thought on Remus' mind when he woke, completely human and in far less pain than he expected. Groaning, he forced his eyelids open. A black veil of hair laid across the bottom half of his face. Abruptly, Remus became aware of where he was. He rested on his side with his back pressed against someone's chest. A pair of arms encircled him, and his bangs ruffled whenever a gust of warm breath blew across it.

The situation was eerily familiar. He had been held much the same way once before. He tried to shift from his present position but a sharp pain shot up from his waist. Body tensing against his will, the pain swam a wide circle through him before dying down again. A horrible feeling lurked at the back of his mind. Remus wanted to throw up. He was raped… again.

But- last night was full moon-

Remus, with a burst of strength, broke loose from the confines of the other's warm arms. He crawled a safe distance away, took a deep breath, and turned to confirm his worse suspicion.

It was Sirius. _Not that I'd thought of anyone else,_ Remus thought bitterly. There was something… He was forgetting something… Sirius had shown up after the doors locked last night. He had… oh no…

Merlin… he was mated. Remus sank down helplessly. For a moment that seemed too long, he stared dazedly at the dusty floor, eyes wide with disbelief. Briefly, he shut his eyes, opening them again to make sure it wasn't a dream. Mated… against his will… in a bond he wasn't certain of.

With Sirius… Remus pressed both hands against his eyes, willing the truth to leave him behind. No. He wasn't going to accept this! No! How could he have been so careless! How?

Tears began to gather. Remus hated himself at that point. How could he have bitten Sirius? Didn't he have more self control? Sirius was the enemy! He swore! He swore he wouldn't let anyone touch him again! How…

Letting out of sound that was half a sob, he buried his head in his knees. Yes, when he was little, he had dreamed of being mated, but not like this…

Remus didn't know how long he stayed within the confining walls of his misery. When he came to himself again, he could feel that some time had already passed. His teeth tightened. After another few seconds, he was more or less in control of himself again.

Sirius was still asleep, a small smile of contentment on his face. Remus shuddered, thinking back on his earlier full moons. He hadn't woken for an entire day once.

The werewolf struggled to his feet. The Order would be in here any moment. What- was he to do? Should he try to explain? Accuse them? Should he even try to pretend that he was in control? Remus knew he'd most likely break down if he saw any of his friends again.

Remus bit his lips hard enough to draw blood. He had always told himself that he was happy that his own sire was captured before he could have become another common victim of werewolf mating offence. It had been a balding wizard in his early forties, a pedophile and mental case by nature, and Remus shuddered to think of what his life would've been if he had been forced to mate with that man.

But his fortunes had run themselves full circle. There he was, eighteen years later, and fate had finally caught up with him.

In the end, he was just another victim of…

Sirius stirred, and Remus felt his heart miss a beat in terror. He was awake already?

Picking himself up, Remus managed to limp towards the exit. There were small wounds across his body, but unlike usual, he hadn't crippled himself during the night. His fingers linked around the metal cage around his door. Squinting, he peered out at the muggle clock that hung in the hall outside. 9:51...

Nine more minutes before the ministry officials come in. Remus turned back to the man that was now stretching sleepily. It was obvious he was awake, but too lazy to get up as usual. Nervous eyes scanned the room. There had to be something he could do!

Maybe if he was lucky he'd find a wooden club. He could bash Sirius back into unconsciousness before he even realized what was happening. Remus knew that with his werewolf strength, he could probably deliver a kick hard enough to knock a normal Sirius Black unconscious, but wasn't sure now that the other had turned as well.

Before he could think of anything, Sirius had rolled over, and his gray eyes cracked open a small slit. Remus swallowed as their gaze met. He tried to read the complex array of emotions that flitted through the other man's eyes. When he was younger Remus had been able to read everyone, even Sirius, but since the incident on Christmas in his seventh year, this extra sense of his had dimmed.

Sirius was the first one to break away by blinking. He shook his head dazedly, looking as bewildered as Remus had felt earlier on. Only, his expression was a positive disbelief.

"Moony," he whispered. "I'm not dreaming."

Unexpectedly, Remus felt a sudden surge of anger. He had, as usual, asked Alastor to take his wand, as the older auror was a friend and always volunteered the shift to guard him during full moons.

But then, Sirius couldn't use magic either. The wards wouldn't be down for another ten minutes.

"Stay away from me, Black," he warned. "You're deep in enemy territory." His eyes flitted to the clock. 9:54 if he was optimistic, as the thin hands of the muggle device was hard to read.

Sirius blinked. So… Remus still hated him… What little acceptance he received last night was a result of exhaustion and impending transformation, nothing more. His hands reached into his somewhat ripped robe, wincing as various cuts on his arm bit at him.

He pulled out his wand. Remus was right, this was a very bad place to be found. When were they coming in? Ten o'clock… what time was it? He had been in a hurry last night, but he seemed to remember there being a muggle clock in the hall. Remus was blocking it.

"Moony," Sirius said cautiously. "What time is it?"

"Nine thirty, why?" Remus said suspiciously. Sirius calculated. Half an hour was enough. Now… this was part of the plan that he _had_ thought a great deal about.

"Nothing, Moony. I just wanted to show you something." Lowering his wand, Sirius, instead, pulled out a tattered cotton scarf from an inside pocket of his robes. It looked slightly worse for wear after the full moon. "Do you remember this? I'd always wanted to give this back to you." He held out the aged white cloth.

For a brief moment, Remus' eyes flickered. Yes, he remembered that scarf. He'd given it to Sirius in third year when the four Marauders were in Hogsmead. Sirius, in a valiant effort to set Professor Karkaroff's robes on fire, had accidentally, burned part of his own winter clothes. With the snow coming down hard, James had spared a cloak and he a scarf as they ran the rest of the way back to school. Not that Karkaroff had gotten it off easy; the old man had retired bitterly the next year, swearing that all Hogwarts students were devils. His son, who had been an assistant at Hogwarts at the time, had transferred to Durmstrang. Last Remus heard, the younger Karkaroff was rising to the position of Headmaster due to extreme lack of good candidates.

He shook his head to rid himself of bygones. "Would that happen to be a port key, Black?" Remus said coldly. "Would it transport me straight to Voldemort's headquarters?"

Sirius only raised one corner of his lips in his infamous smirk. Instead, he stuffed the scarf back into his pocket carelessly and climbed to his feet. He winced as he grazed his injured right hand on the cloth of his robe. "You're supposed to come with me, Moony. We're mated."

"No."

Sirius stopped. "What is that supposed to mean?" He demanded. "What do you mean 'no'?"

"I mean that we are not mated," Remus said shortly. "I will not accept a bond formed under these conditions."

"Why not?" Sirius took a step towards Remus, who tensed up again. "You _bit_ me, Moony! That meant you had accepted me. If it's mutual, even the Ministry can't deny the bond." He rolled his eyes. "And look, the bond isn't something you can just bloody _deny_. You can't do it. If we're mated, we're mated."

"You took advantage of the situation," Remus shot back angrily. "You traded two knuts for a sickle with a baby. It's not a trade, it's robbery. What you have done doesn't result in a bond, but a crime."

"Moony-" Sirius froze as he heard the first gate from the outside unlock. Impossible! They can't have used up half an hour already! That was utterly ridiculous! Then it dawned on him. Damned, he thought he had time! "You-" he spat to Remus. "You said it was nine thirty!"

"I lied." Remus swallowed with difficulty. Any second now, the wards would come crashing down over them, and the first to react to the magic would triumph. The tense air hung across them. Remus tightened his hands, waiting for the chance. He wasn't all that adept at wandless magic, he wasn't even much of a dueler, but Sirius was mistaken if he thought that Remus J. Lupin would submit so easily. His mind finally came to a rest on a spell he had learned from the pyrelings.

The second door clicked open. Voices murmured behind him, something about a white dog and cake. Remus couldn't care less.

There was a sudden rush of air that told him the wards were going down. Remus snapped into action. His hands twisted inwards towards his chest, forming an intricate gesture in the split of a second. Under his breath, he whispered, "_barsewe vertrek_."

"_Imperio_!"Sirius shouted simultaneously. Remus tried to dodge, and a slightly dreamy feeling swept over him. Almost as if… he was floating-

Then it was over as Remus' own spell took effect, and his body was forcibly removed from the curse. He stared at Sirius from the other side of the room. A ring of Remus-like figures stood in a ring around him. He panted, standing amongst his clones, slightly disbelieving. He- he hadn't been able to dodge at all! He had heard Sirius shout the curse, but when he had tried to move, the spell was already upon him.

If he wasn't mistaken, Sirius had just tried to cast the Imperius curse on him. His teeth tightened briefly, but straightened himself as Sirius looked his way again. Face passive, he blended in with multiple copies of himself. There were perhaps twenty odd conjurations in the room, each with tawny hair that fell to brush against their necks and solemn, delicate features strangely resembled the ethereal ancestors of elves.

Screams sounded in the hallway as the witches and wizards saw the scene inside the room. Alastor Moody was the first to enter the room, wand drawn.

"Black!" He roared. "I _knew_ it! I _knew_ something was going to go wrong one of these days! _Petrificus totalus!_" The spell was aimed at Sirius before anyone could protest. Light flashed in the formerly dark room. The replicas of Remus were perfectly still, and Moody's magic vaulted over them.

Sirius dodged, and felt the spell whiz over his head like a bludger. He aimed his wand at the one eyed auror between two of Remus' conjurations. "_Stupefy,_" he said, quite calmly. Although his incantation was slow, the speed that the effect appeared was instantaneous. Moody had tried to move, but the spell crashed into the older man before Sirius had finished talking.

Remus' eyes widened. So that was it! The secret to Sirius' dueling skills. His spells initiates faster than anyone else's. He had never seen anyone's magic react so acutely to them, except for perhaps Dumbledore's.

"_Impendimentus!_" Sirius aimed his wand, slowing every wizard in their tracks from rushing into the room. Several wands were raised, but their mouths opened slowly as Sirius magically slammed the door shut on them and locked it with a murmured, "_colloportus._"

Sirius lowered his wand carefully. He knelt down next to the stunned auror and searched his robes, coming up triumphantly with Remus' wand. "I _knew _you would trust old Moody with your wand."

Then he turned his attention to the array of Remus clones. For a moment, his senses were overwhelmed by so many pairs of soft hazel eyes flecked with gold, open in identical unreadable expressions. But it seems… like he was underestimated.

"Moony, you don't think conjuring up clones could fool me, do you?" Sirius smiled and shook his head. He slowly scanning the crowd. There, standing between two others that looked exactly like him, was Remus. There was no mistaking the feeling that arose in his chest when he saw his mate. It was just somehow _different_ from looking at lifeless bodies conjured up by magic. "There is no way I'd be able to mistake any one of these for you."

At that moment, nothing else truly mattered. His one greatest goal in life was complete. If _Avada Kedavra _hit him at that moment, he would've happily went to heaven. Remus was _his_.

And he made full use of the bond between them. Tucking Remus' wand into his robes, Sirius' eyes locked on hazel ones. "I'm your mate and I'm the dominant, Moony. You know that as well as I do. Come with me."

Remus paled. His fingers were trembling and his lips opened as if to protest. Slowly, he stepped forward. Eyes registering horror at his own actions, but he couldn't help it. Every ounce of his werewolf strength was turned against him. He took another step.

"No…" he whispered. "Please… don't-" It was terrifying, having his body defy him like this. Was this what a mating bond meant? He'd be a slave within his own body! How did other werewolves live like this?

He was within a foot from Sirius when his mate reached for him, drawing him into a rough kiss. Fingers tangled into his hair and a tongue brushed against his. Remus closed his eyes tightly, humiliation rising up within him.

The kiss lasted only for a couple seconds, for Sirius didn't dare indulge himself in the face of danger. Remus was panting as he pulled away, eyes narrowed in a conflict of emotions. Drawing the other close, Sirius pulled the white scarf from his pocket and looped it around Remus' bare throat.

Turning to the wide eyed wizards behind the door, most of whom had forgotten to attack at seeing two werewolves, two _live_ werewolves' bond at work. The ones that hadn't forgotten had left to find help. Sirius smirked, lifting an irresistible expression that had caused girls to swoon during his school days. "Gentlemen, ladies, I apologize for making an early exit. I'm taking the moonchild off your hands."

Turning to Remus, his voice softened. "Moony, let's go, alright?"

Before Remus could reply, '_portus_' had activated the key and whisked both of them away to Voldemort's newest hideout.

* * *

Author's Note: Um… I was hoping to write a lemon, but I chickened out at the last moment. After all, who would want their first lemon to be… um… bestiality? I swear a lemon will be included in this story somewhere, even if I have to suicide myself on it.

Hope nobody minds if I refer to Remus as a 'she' when he's in werewolf form.

I'll admit that this chapter was probably monotone and didn't live up to the standards of the first one, but like Sirius, this was the part of the story I didn't think too much about. It's hard to write about either character's reactions, because this is an important thing to Sirius and he can't write it off as a joke, and it's _so_ hard to write a Remus that has the amount of self-control I always thought Remus had.

I had underestimated reviews. sweat drop I was practically _clinging_ on to them during the couple days I first posted. My life _revolved_ around them. So thank you soooo much, everyone!

TravellerMK: Three cheers for my first reviewer, yay! (Thank you)x10000000 heart Personally, I can't see Remus as dominant. O.o…

Andie12: :D, first time I've been called original before. I luv Sirius too, though you might be a little disappointed in his characterization in this chapter. He's actually not supposed to be _that_ dark… It just seemed to come off that way…

Methoslover: too busy floating in ecstasy somewhere to write more jk, thank you.

Gold Silk: Is it John? >. Jeremy sounds better But I'll change the two things you pointed out as soon as I can. Yay! Your review has been the most helpful so far.

Ophel McNeil: Really? feels fluttery Thank you! ß cheesy grin

Larka Avilak: Hope I can keep up the length -'… Thanks for pointing out the 'Light vs. Order' thing. It's probably my obsession with the whole Light/Dark labels. I'll change that.

Jess moony: Thank you, don't know if you'll count this as soon though.

Eccentric mind: Yeah… first _fan_fic. I do other writing on my own.

Alpha2nd2003: John… I had a crush on a guy name John (or actually, we all called him Jo) in high school, but then he went nerdy on me and went to an advanced education program. sob why can't I be smarter? Hm… Remus suffers a lot… but I can't help it.

Nightmare-chan22: You know what's funny? When I first explained the plot to my friend, she said her favorite character is Voldemort. sweatdrop I don't know… I just don't see him _or_ any of the Death Eaters to be entirely evil. At least not at first.

OrA-ShiNi-gi: Yay for my- wait… I have a writing style? O.o

Apus-Equuleus: Don't worry, I'd accidentally wrote Sirius a little darker than I intended in chapter one. He really does love Remus very much, and nobody that can love that deeply can be _that_ bad, right? And the Ministry's rule on werewolves is actually quite fair. I should be explained later on as to why.

Amaroq: Actually, the whole mating part is a little overused. I guess the only twist I added to it was that both parties had to be werewolves, and that werewolf forms could be a different gender than the human form. I'll still change the smaller facts though.

Emma Lupin: Don't worry, I think Sirius has to work _really, really_ hard if he wants the relationship to work. Cuz although there's more to this fic than S/R get together (or re-get-together, I suppose), that's one of the main things.

YamikiofAnime: Nah, I wouldn't start a story without the intention of continuing it.

Mikril-dey


	3. The Silver eyed Anomaly

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: PG-13 for sexual innuendos, one line at the end toes the line (no pun intended)

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)… the non-con bit was over in chapter 2

Type: AU, romance, drama

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 3: The Silver-eyed Anomaly 

"Let go!" Remus tugged hard at his hand, which was currently enclosed in Sirius' vice-like grip. They were going to see Voldemort, or at least, some prominent Death Eater, and the very thought made him sick to his stomach.

The halls of Voldemort's hide-out was unexpectedly cheerful, despite the fact all the portraits that stared critically at him were dressed in Slytherin green. The floor swayed to a gentle, almost non-existent rhythm that Remus had gotten used to after a while.

They had crashed down in a room with a ring of Death Eaters surrounding them, wands drawn. There had been a sense of _deja vu_, only this time, Remus was the one outnumbered nearly ten to one, wandless and scared. He had nervously licked his lips, eyes flickering from one hooded figure to another.

"Good morning," Sirius had grinned, picking himself off the ground and pulling Remus with him. It was amazing how much grace he possessed despite having landed in a clump of arms and legs on the floor. "I trust that you will inform Lord Voldemort for me that the mission was a complete success. And you will inform division three that they owe me three galleons each."

Then something had dawned on Remus; the wizards present… had ridiculously weak magical auras. None of the more prominent dark wizards had been present. Could this mean something? Perhaps there were no strong wizards available. What had Voldemort been up to lately?

And more importantly, where was their spy?

Remus stumbled, too caught in his own thoughts to pay attention to his footing. Something irked him about the place. These halls… they seemed somehow familiar. Long, crooked, with tiny corridors that grew off on either side like a splintered branch.

He had a headache, a dull throb in his head that prevented him from thinking properly.

He blinked. Sirius had stopped walking and stood with his back towards him. From behind, there was a certain tension in the taller man's crunched shoulders. For a moment, he looked lonely, even with the jovial light dancing across his black hair. Remus didn't want to think how Sirius had survived the last five years, probably as cut off as he was. He contemplated what to say but Sirius turned abruptly.

"Listen, Moony," his voice was low, all laughter gone. "This isn't the Order. Without me here, any of the Death Eaters will kill you any chance they get." He released Remus' wrists to run a hand through tawny hair that was as soft as he remembered. Remus backed away, mouth set in a thin line. The headache only grew worse.

"Better them than you," he said finally. "At least they are not hypocrites."

"Moony, we're all hypocrites," Sirius snorted. "All the Death Eaters boast about things they've never actually done. All of us say things we don't truly mean." He folded his arms. "Which is why you need to stay by my side at all times."

"I fail to see the connection."

Suddenly, Sirius was before him, arms gripping his shoulder tightly. Remus swallowed, the sudden movement was like a hammer inside his skull.

"They swore that they'll stay away from you," Sirius hissed. "But knowing this bunch, there's no trusting that. Moony, listen. I know you're not afraid of them, but what if they cast _Legilimens_? Veritaserum? Are you about to give away every secret Dumbledore's ever told you? If, Merlin forbid, you're Prongs' secret keeper, you better think about others before acting rashly."

"You let me worry about that, Black," Remus shoved the other away, knowing full well that if Sirius really tried, he could easily overpower him.

It was true, he would die before revealing where James was. However, he wasn't even the secret keeper anymore. "I wouldn't have been made secret keeper if I can't defend myself."

"I'd like to see you _defend_ yourself when faced with a billion Death Eaters," Sirius snarled. "You have no idea-" He cut himself off. Remus stared at him in confusion as he tried to collect himself. A moment passed before a slow smile crept up his handsome face. "Moony, I'll tell them about the spy."

Remus felt a chill. Spy… Snape. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

Sirius smirked. "I'll tell Voldemort about Snivellus, Moony. How long do you think he'll last? Unless, of course, you've changed your mind."

"Bastard," Remus' eyes flashed. "That was low, Black, even for you."

"Anything for you, Moony," Sirius grinned. "First order, don't move." Before Remus could wonder about what Sirius meant, several things happened simultaneously.

A hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer to the taller man, whose lips fastened over his mouth. Remus didn't have time to react as a tongue forced its way in, easily defeating his own unprepared tongue and tangling it in a domineering kiss.

"Mmmph!" Remus yelped into the deep kiss as he was lifted off the ground, head angled for better access to his mouth. Sirius smirked into their locked lips, and the arms around him tightened.

It was a moment before Remus found the state of mind to push himself away, and Sirius released him from the kiss with a grin. He shifted the smaller body against his, carried in bridal fashion, and resumed his trek.

Sirius laughed when Remus protested. "I thought it was customary to carry the bride into the house. We're basically married, Moony."

"I said, 'let go,'" Remus said angrily. His life looked thoroughly bleak. _Werewolf mating is like a marriage without the possibility of divorce, _one of his old books had said. _It is the ideal situation for abusive relationships. That is why the laws banned them, even though they will make previously vicious werewolves docile._

"Sure thing, Moony," Sirius said gently. "Just remember what I said about Snivellus." To his surprise, he was slowly lowered down, and his wrist was taken again. This time, Remus allowed himself to be led down the hall. A new sense of helplessness washed over him. How was he even supposed to _know_ if Snape was still safe? For all he knew, the spy had already been found out and Sirius was just using this as leverage.

They turned down another hall, and Remus again felt that tickle at the back of his mind. He had been here before! He was sure of it. But… why would he have been at Voldemort's hiding place? The discomfort had now traveled down and there was an uneasy feeling in his stomach. For a moment, he fancied that the ground had lurched.

"Where are we going?" He blurted out.

He wasn't expecting an answer, and wasn't expecting it when Sirius whirled around, with a smile that couldn't have been brighter if Christmas had come early. "We need to go get our wounds taken care of, then report to Voldemort. And we need to go home soon."

"Home?" Remus echoed in disbelief. "_We_ need to go home?"

"Of course," Sirius said cheerfully. "I need to check on my cousin and Malfoy's brat. They moved in next door, and I wouldn't trust Malfoy Junior to keep himself alive for more than a couple hours. We also need to think of a way to get your things."

Remus didn't know if it was the way it was said, like living with Sirius was already a fact, but he suddenly felt cold. For a moment, he considered running away just to find somewhere quiet, where he could break down and cry. It was hard being cold to Sirius, and it was hard pretending to be strong. He closed his eyes tightly. He could sense an oncoming conflict deep inside him. Merlin, he did _not_ want to lose control when he faced Voldemort.

They were silent the rest of the way, with Sirius stopping to talk to the occasional Death Eater. Remus could feel sneering gazes upon him and couldn't help but lower his head. Fist clenched at his side, he stuck close to the walls and pretended not to hear when Sirius fended off the infrequent "He's as pretty as I imagined, good eye, Black." or the doubtful "You sure he's worth seven years? He doesn't look like he could take much."

On some level, Remus was grateful that Sirius only answered with a simple "Thank you," or "You have no idea."

"Don't worry, I'll make sure he lasts," Sirius' last remark made Remus snap his head up. Sirius wasn't even looking at the Death Eater talking to him, but at another black cloaked figure standing on the other side of the hall, eyes lit in both triumph and revulsion.

Remus followed his gaze. The black cloaked figure noticed him, and pushed his hood down to reveal unnaturally pale skin and a cold, unfeeling face. Remus felt his eyes widen in shock, then in relief. It was Snape, still undiscovered.

A look passed between them, two allies both virtually prisoners in a sea of enemies and strangers. Instinctively they noted the other's welfare critically, satisfied that there were no outward signs of injury.

Sirius seemed to notice the little exchange and angrily pulled Remus closer to him. "Later Igor," he said courtly. "I've got to report back to Lord Voldemort."

That was when Remus noticed the wizard he had been talking to. Igor Karkaroff. His memory clicked.

Durmstrang! This place was the School of Durmstrang! Before Dumbledore found him, he had been thinking of a teaching job and came for an interview. However, the staff had shooed him out the door before he made it into the main office. He still remembered the strange winding halls. That would explain why the school rocked from side to side!

The school had been built virtually on water, and the result was no different from being on a ship. And the nausea Remus was feeling was sea-sickness.

But- how had they hid it from the students and other teachers?

Sirius came to a stop before the infirmary. "I've changed my mind," he proclaimed suddenly. "You go get your wounds looked after while I report to Voldemort. It saves time."

"Um…" Remus looked adorably confused. "No it doesn't, Pa-" He cut himself off in time, instead settling for an uncertain glance at the closed door.

"Anyways, Voldemort will have my hide if I'm late," Sirius clapped a hand on Remus' shoulder. A stab of pain ran through him when Remus flinched and backed away. "Go on in."

It took every ounce of Sirius' willpower to keep himself in place as Remus vanished behind the door. He wanted nothing more than to race after him, sweep him up in a tight embrace and never let go. The thought of anyone other than him exposing the smaller man's soft, pale skin, even for medical purposes, nearly drove him insane. However, asking Remus to meet Voldemort with him was asking too much.

He fingered his Dark Mark, which was beginning to smoke, sending waves of pain through him. "Damned impatient bastard," he muttered. "Can't a man take care of his wounds first?"

Perhaps it was better if Remus went in alone. What faces him on the other side of the hospital door should probably be faced alone. If Sirius was there with him, there would be very little healing done at all.

All too soon, he was before the Dark Lord's study again. Voldemort's new study had a different decoration from last time, and now everything seemed to be shrouded with a curtain of misty red. There was a hint of crimson in the walls.

He knocked courtly on the door.

"Come in, and bring the werewolf with you," Voldemort's pleasant voice seeped through the door. Sirius shivered. _It was right to leave Moony at the hospital,_ he told himself. _No telling what Voldemort will do._

The Dark Lord was smiling as he entered the room. For a moment, both stayed silent. Blue-starred ceilings and walls wore a faint tint of red. There was a small stain of blood that Voldemort had not bothered to clean beneath his feet. Sirius stepped to one side.

"Yes my Lord?" Sirius waited, but Voldemort did not gesture for him to sit down.

"Where is the werewolf?" Voldemort asked, eyes slightly narrowed.

"Right here," Sirius answered. Suddenly, his Dark Mark burst into flames. Crying out, he stumbled backwards, clutching his arm to his side. The fire died down as quickly as it came, and Sirius drew in a shaky breath. He collapsed into the nearest chair, arm cradled protectively against his chest.

He stared at Voldemort with slight apprehension. There had been no forewarning, no wand held outward, no whispered spell, not even a flicker in the dark wizard's eyes. There was no question which one of them would win in a duel.

"Kindly answer the question, Sirius," Voldemort smiled as if nothing had happened. "Where is Lupin?"

"At the infirmary," Sirius gritted his teeth. "You asked about a werewolf. My Lord, _I_ am one of them now." His breathing had calmed, but his hand still hovered nervously beside his Dark Mark, in case the unpredictable Voldemort decided to set him on fire again.

"Ah, I apologize, I had misunderstood," Voldemort said. "I had thought you meant to hide the werewolf from me. If that is not the case, send for him. I have a great desire to see this so-called moonchild."

Sirius didn't answer.

"Or should I take this as an indication, Black," Voldemort continued idly. "As soon as you'd gotten what you wanted, serving me becomes second priority? You'd like nothing better than to go back to those muggle lovers, betraying those that helped you in your direst moment?"

"No, my Lord," Sirius said quietly. "I would still serve you."

"Of course," the older man pulled a loose strand of dark hair behind his ears. "I was the one that gave the moonchild to you. He is also mine to take away."

Sirius felt his expression harden. _He wouldn't dare touch Moony. He swore._ "Honor your promise, my Lord," he said stiffly. "And I'll keep my word with you."

* * *

Back at the Infirmary

Remus couldn't help but feel nervous as he entered the brightly lit hospital. What Death Eaters would be waiting for him there? Was Sirius stupid enough to actually expect him to _accept_ care given by Voldemort's cronies?

He decided that even if he didn't have his wand, he could still give any Death Eater a few broken teeth.

"Hello, how can I help?" the strangely familiar voice asked. A face still barely rid of baby fat poked around the curtains. Familiar blond hair and a slightly chubby cheeks stared out at him, eyes small and watery.

Remus gasped, the world spinning around him. "You-" he breathed. "It… I thought you-"

The other party wasn't much better off. The years had not been kind to Peter Pettigrew. While they had given Sirius another two inches in height and an even more handsome face, it had stolen the thin layer of blond hair that once stood atop Peter's head. He was as short as ever and there were wrinkles under his eyes. The other young man looked, if possible, even more tired than Remus was.

"M-Moony…" Peter stammered, eyes impossibly wide. "Wha- what are you doing here?"

Remus didn't hear him. "I thought you were dead…" He whispered. Defenses broke. After seven years, memories of Peter was like a faded image in a lake, there only if the sun shines in the right place. "Wormtail… you…"

"It's good to see you, Moony," Peter said quietly. "I though- that I'd never see any of you again… Not even Padfoot comes here much anymore." At Remus' silent daze, he grew nervous again. "Right, so um… sit on that bed. Are you hurt then? Why are you here?"

Numbly, Remus sat. Peter folded back his long robe and began to inspect a particularly nasty bruise on Remus' left arm, frowning as he did. It was amazing… seeing Peter alive, with a finger missing from his left hand. He stared dully as Peter cast a simple healing spell, then moving on to another wound. Emotions bubbled up through him. Finally, it boiled over.

"But you're _dead_!" he cried. "Padfoot killed you! We all saw it in the papers! Nymphodora saw you! And all the muggles-"

"That's because… I-I didn't want anyone to hate me, alright?" Peter said with difficulty. "So I faked it. It was just better that way. You'd all remember me as a marauder. You and Prongs. Prongs especially. I wouldn't have been able to stand it if any of you hated me."

A cold chill ran through Remus' chest. "Wormtail…" He said. "Let me see your arm."

"Moony-"

"Wormtail, please, I need to see your arm." Remus grabbed onto Peter's robes as the other backed away in near panic. There was little doubt, but Remus had to see for himself to be sure-

He pulled up Peter's sleeve to reveal a black skull with a snake wound around it. In the bright light, the Dark Mark looked ridiculously harmless, much like the common tattoos that some muggles have. However, Remus could feel the intense dark power lurking behind those black lines.

"Wormtail…" Remus' head felt strangely light. Of the old marauders, two had became Death Eaters. Where did it go wrong? What had happened to their friendship, the pranks they played? The oaths they had sworn to each other without saying a word?

Peter promptly burst into tears. "I never- never wanted you to k… know," he blubbered. "Pl… please don't let Prongs know… Just… let him think I've d… died."

"Why," Remus whispered, biting his lips. "It's _Voldemort_, we… weren't we going to become aurors together? Weren't we going to be the best of the best, like Padfoot always said?"

Peter shook his head, and buried his face in the white hospital blankets. Remus could see the other boy's shoulders quivering. Seven years ago, he would've thrown his arms around his friend and said something ridiculously funny that they ended up laughing on the floor. He turned away, pressing a hand against his closed eyes. He tried to concentrate on breathing as Peter began to stammer.

"I… I wasn't strong like the rest of you," Peter choked out. "When I left Hogwarts I… saw this group of people… they were so str- strong… and rich… They just had so much _control_ over themselves. I- I thought I could be like that Moony.

"Then they told me that I was a… pureblood and one of them. That I was part of… something b… bigger."

Remus glanced at him as Peter raised his tear-stained face up at him. There was helplessness in his eyes.

"I know I had relied so much on the rest of you that- it m… meant a lot to me to belong. By the time I… realized it was wrong… I'd… too far." He faltered. Remus placed a hand on the other man's shoulder. "I can't get out, Moony… None of us can. He'd k… kill us! He'd destroy everything we'd… ever loved."

"Wormtail… it's alright…" Remus swallowed. "You've been their mediwizard, haven't you? You haven't killed anybody."

"You don't get it," Peter jerked himself away, stomping off to get his records. Angrily, he wrote Remus' name at the top of a blank sheet. When he returned, his face was hard. "I gave away where Prongs was."

"What?" Remus didn't quite understand.

Before Peter could reply, the door slid open. They both look up and the conversation died at the tips of their tongues. Sirius Black had just entered the infirmary. His lips were tightly set, and he gingerly lowered himself down beside Remus, who was too overwhelmed to care. Thin lips stretched into a grimace. "I need my arm looked at."

"P- Padfoot!" Peter squeaked, all the toughness he had obtained in the earlier moment was gone. "This is- a surprise-"

Sirius ignored Peter. Instead, he fixed his unnerving gray eyes on Remus' face. "What he means is that, unlike the Daily Prophet would have you believe, I was not the one that gave Prongs to Voldemort."

Peter whimpered at the name. He busied himself with the various cuts on Sirius' arm. Part of Sirius' robes seemed burnt off, revealing a Dark Mark with tiny blisters around it.

"But you were their secret keeper," Remus said. "Prongs asked you. Unless… it- it was _Wormtail_. Unless you switched, without telling me-"

Sirius nodded, eyes never leaving Remus'. He brought his had up to cup his mate's face. Remus pulled away. "Yes, it was Wormtail."

It was as if the sky collapsed over his head. The expression on Remus' face was so horrified, so vulnerable, and Sirius leaned in without thinking. He pulled the smaller body tightly against his and felt an ache when there was no resistance. It wasn't because Remus accepted him… but because he wasn't capable of resisting.

"I couldn't refuse," Peter spoke up desperately. Remus' eyes were slightly glassy as he rested his cheek against Sirius' shoulder. "Prongs was all earnest, and you guys ask me favors so rarely… I knew I was a D-D-Death Eater, but-"

"You?" Remus asked softly, haunting eyes dimmed. "You gave Prongs away? You were the one that betrayed us…" Sirius buried his face against the smaller man's neck, holding on tighter as if that could shield him from all the harm in the world.

He breathed in the slightly sweet scent of Remus' hair, trying to enjoy the moment as long as it lasted. Finally, he decided to clarify. "Wormtail got in that pansy Dolohov's way and was put under the Cruciatus curse for nearly half an hour. He was rambling by the end and was found out. The bastard told Voldemort about it and blackmailed Wormtail into framing me."

"Dolohov? As in Antonin Dolohov? That Death Eater that was sent to Azkaban?" Remus regained his mind and pushed Sirius away again. The black haired man tried to hide his disappointment.

"One of my more ingenious moments," His smile turned positively malicious. "I dropped him off at Lockhart's. Remember that Hufflepuff that was only good at memory charms? You should've seen his face when Dolohov fell through his chimney."

Remus blinked, trying to imagine that and failing.

"He screamed like a bloody girl and started shooting _Obliviate_ in every direction. That was why Dolohov couldn't remember a thing when they questioned him on trial." Sirius laughed.

"And now Lockhart's claimed as a hero! I mean, have you _read_ his books?" Remus said in stunned horror. "So really _you_ were the one who turned Dolohov in."

"He was a useless Death Eater anyway," Sirius said dismissively. He sneaked a look sideways at the delicate face framed by tawny hair and was promptly mesmerized. Remus flinched as an arm was wrapped possessively around his waist. Peter's eyes went wide, anxiously looking from one marauder to the other. The atmosphere had abruptly changed.

Remus tried to stand, but Sirius tightened his grip and gave a sharp tug. Anybody else might've fallen onto his lap, but Remus was a werewolf. "What are you _doing_?" he demanded, bracing his feet against the white stone floor.

"What- what are you- doing, Padfoot?" Peter echoed.

"Hmm?" Sirius stood up as well, enjoying how he was an entire head taller than his mate. Merling, Remus was so beautiful… face flushed with anger and embarrassment. This was what he wanted… wasn't it?

"Moony's my mate. I'm allowed to do this." Sirius' words were as much directed at himself as at Peter.

"You're out of your mind! Let me go!" Remus struggled. What had happened? Just a moment ago, they had been acting like the gap of seven years was nothing, like they were marauders again. And now-

"Kiss me," Sirius ordered, staring deep into golden eyes. The force behind their bond hummed in the back of his head. For a moment, Remus looked fearful, and small hesitant arms locked around his waist. Sirius swooped down as his mate slowly raised his head upwards.

There was a thrill… Remus was accepting him! Perhaps it only happened because of the bond, but the acceptance shot straight into Sirius' heart. Their faces were so close… and Sirius could see those beautiful golden eyes fixed on him.

The white scarf inside his pocket spilled out, draping itself against the bed. Remus' eyes left him for a moment as he saw the scarf. Then the kiss was turned away. "No," he gasped, a hint of panic in his voice. "No, I'm not- going to kiss you."

And it seemed as if the world had just broken in half. All the warm feelings in Sirius chest seemed to be washed away. The arms by his waist fell away. He snatched the scarf up furiously.

"But we just established that I didn't kill Wormtail, nor did I betray Prongs," Sirius growled. "You're mine and there's no way around it. Why can't you just accept me?"

Peter was completely lost, looking between his two former friends. He was… obviously out of his league.

"If you don't know," Remus gritted his teeth. "Then don't bother. You don't know _anything_, Sirius."

"We'll talk about this at home," Sirius said gruffly, cutting him off. At least, he told himself, Remus had called him Sirius. Not Black, Sirius. That was better, wasn't it?

Ignoring Remus' struggles, Sirius pressed a quick kiss against the werewolf's lips and turned to Peter. "I'm using your floo, alright?"

Peter nodded dumbly, too scared to speak up.

* * *

Home

"Why did you do that?" Sirius said slowly. "You were going to kiss me, so why did you resist? Why do you- deny the bond?"

Remus' teeth tightened. He didn't plan on answering Sirius' question. When he saw the scarf… it brought back that same snowy day when they were all just children. There had been no lust, no complications. At that moment, they were just marauders…

So he resisted, fought the bond with everything he had. And he had won. Remus never knew triumph could feel so horrible.

"I love you, Moony," Sirius reached for him. "I don't want to hurt you."

Hurt? But… it was too late. Remus looked away. Why did he feel like crying? It was just another statement. Sirius had said it himself… all Death Eater's are liars.

No! He can't cry. He didn't even lose much of his calm when facing Peter, who was supposed to be dead! He can't cry in front of Sirius. He had to leave, surely there was a bathroom in this house where he could turn on the tap to hide his sobs. Or at the very least, he had to make sure Sirius didn't see him.

Turning, Remus was about leave when Sirius spun him around and locked him into their tightest embrace as of yet. Remus stopped, stunned for a moment, before realizing his situation and the confining heat of the arms around him.

His hands fisted in Sirius' robe and he pushed on the other's chest, trying to maintain what little distance there was between them. "Let go!" He said hoarsely. "Black, I need some time alone."

Sirius ignored him. Remus didn't know what he needed or wanted. Pulling forward, he rested his chin in the soft downy hair and weaved his hand through it. He was a head taller than Remus, and it was easy to securely hold the smaller man against him like this. This… this felt safe. When Remus was this close to him, he could be sure that, at least for the time being, nothing was going to hurt the one he loved.

It was warm… but Remus knew he didn't want this. "I don't want to see you right now."

"Then close your eyes," Sirius whispered. "Just… just shut up for a moment. Don't you… feel anything?"

They were too close… Remus didn't stop struggling. Even as the first tear slipped down his cheeks. No! Sirius would see! He can't know how weak he really was. They were enemies…

"You're crying."

"No, I am not," Remus forced out, hating the tremor in his voice. "I'm warning you. Let me go."

At that Sirius grew angry again. "Damn!" He loosened his arms and allowed Remus to push them apart. His heart was thudding painfully. "What do I have to do? What does it take, Moony?"

Remus stumbled backwards, trying to stop himself from crying. "You- you've never known what true love is."

"_I_ don't?" Sirius raged. "Seven years, Moony! Don't you _dare_ tell me I don't know what true love is."

"Seven years, seven years, that's all I hear from you!" Remus bit his lips. "Love isn't measured in years! Do you remember telling Snape about my werewolf form in sixth year?"

"Oh so this is about him, is it?"

"_No_ this isn't about Snape!" Remus wiped a hand across his eyes, swallowing thick lumps down his throat. "You and Prongs have always hated him. But Lily and he had been friends-"

"Get to the point!" Sirius snarled.

"Prongs _saved_ Snape, Padfoot! For Lily!" Remus cried. "Lily liked Snape more than him then! But Prongs still saved him! That's what true love means. You wouldn't be able to do it! If I _did_ like someone better than you, you would have killed them yourself."

For a moment, Sirius had nothing to say. Remus was right. Remus knew him too well, knew his every habit, every fault… So that was what it took.

But how could he change… when the mere thought of Remus smiling at someone else drove him insane with jealousy? And whenever somebody else mentioned that precious name, he tensed and immediately became defensive?

"I-"

"Sirius Black," Remus forced out. "I loved you once. I'm not going to make the same mistake again."

"Let's… go upstairs…" Sirius whispered. He was an idiot. He had assumed that Remus just didn't know how he felt… He'd assumed that if he showed Remus that their mating… and their bond wasn't purely based on physical attractions, he would be accepted.

Sirius was unable to look into Remus' bright eyes, knowing that Remus understood the depth of his feelings… and that it wasn't enough.

Remus nodded courtly. Trying to control his conflicting emotions. There… he'd said it. He'd finally told Sirius how he'd felt. What he didn't say was that once upon a time, he wouldn't have cared as long as he was with Sirius. But that trust had been broken once.

That wasn't going to happen again.

They were silent as they made their way up the stairs. The house was far smaller than Remus would've imagined for Sirius, and there was only four doors at the top. One obviously led to the bathroom, with a small shower schedule pinned on the closed door.

Sirius opened the door at the far end and Remus swallowed. It was quite a large room, with a fancy double bed shoved against one wall. A small fireplace sat at the far end, cradled against the corner. The soft plush carpet beneath his feet was a brilliant Gryffindor scarlet. A door at the far end of the room opened to another small bath.

"This is… your room," Sirius said quietly. "I'll lock the door and you can make sure the windows are shut. I'll be going… now."

After he left, Remus had made sure that the door was locked. He checked the fireplace and found that it wasn't connected to the floo network. Exhausted, he had washed his face and crawled into bed fully dressed.

* * *

At the Headquaters

"James! Oh Merlin, James!" The redhead leaped across the banisters in one swift motion. She bounded up the small winding trail that stretched up to the small cozy home she shared with James Potter. Slightly curled hair was flung behind her in disarray as she burst through the door, breathless with distress.

"James! It's Remus!" She gasped as a bewildered man looked up from his cooking. She leaned herself against the kitchen door in exhaustion.

"What's Remus?" James asked in confusion. "Did he hurt himself during full moon or something."

Lily shook her head tearfully. "I just heard from Dumbledore. Remus was- was taken away by a Death Eater! Just- this morning!"

The chairs clattered backwards as James leaped to his feet. "You aren't serious," he gasped. "It can't be possible! Some of the best aurors and spell sensors were there! You'd think at least Alastor would've suspected something! What kind of idiot would challenge that kind of security?"

"You _know_ who it was, James!" Lily said. After a moment, James nodded.

"I don't understand," James sucked a mouthful of air through his teeth. "Why didn't they tell us? Today at work nobody said anything! I mean, I should've known that Alastor being absent from work was strange but," he shook his head in angry disbelief, "we should've been the first people to know!"

"They didn't even tell Dumbledore," Lily slumped into a seat and laid her cool cheek against the counter. "Dumbledore only knew because he was supposed to meet Remus earlier this evening and Remus never showed up. He had threatened the Ministry into telling him what happened."

An uneasy silence fell over them. James calmed, then looked at their son, who had stopped trying to steal bread dough and was listening silently. "Harry," James said quietly. "Can you go play upstairs for a little?"

Staring at his Father, Harry reluctantly nodded and left the table, and both parents watched the short form slowly leave the kitchen with a mixture of fondness and anxiety. As soon as the boy seemed out of earshot, James spoke.

"It was Sirius, wasn't it?"

Dejectedly, Lily nodded. "Yes… single handedly. He- nobody knows how he got in, but he was just in Remus' room this morning. He disabled Alastor and left using a port key."

"Must've been animagus," James forced out. "I thought they were on the lookout for wizards in animal forms! And why would Moony go with a Death Eater?"

"Some sort of mind control…" Lily's beautiful brows knitted slightly. "The wizards and witches present said Sirius had some sort of control over Remus. Maybe…"

"You- you don't think they mated… do you?" James asked uneasily. "Moony would never accept something like that."

"James," the man looked up to find the most beautiful green eyes in the world staring in determination at him. "We're going to get him back. And if… he was mated… depending on what he wants, we'll deal with Sirius."

"Yeah…" James said tiredly. He leaned over the counter and embraced her. "They… they mean so much to me, Lily… I… losing them would be almost as bad as losing you or Harry…"

"Don't worry," Lily whispered gently. "You know as well as I do that if it's Sirius, Remus would be safe until we get there. We just have to find out where they are."

"If only I'd paid more attention to him!" James burst out. "This would never have happened. Last time I saw him, I didn't even remember when full moon was. What kind of a best friend am I? I should've seen it coming…" He looked pleadingly at Lily.

But Lily only eyed him disapprovingly. "Unless you can find a Time-Turner that takes you back more than six hours, James Potter, that kind of talk is useless. Now listen, Remus won't be kept at Voldemort's headquarters. It's too risky and Sirius would never chance it."

"Then he'd be with Sirius, in his house, most likely," James caught on. "Lily, they can't be at number 12 Grimmauld Place. It's too obvious. What other places does Sirius own? We have to check through the Ministry."

"That would give us a clue, but James, don't get your hopes up too high."

"I know, he could've purchased under a different name, or even as a muggle. His place may be as well hidden as ours, but this is the only clue we have, so we can't let it go." Jame stood up. "I think I'll floo Dumbledore right now."

"Daddy?" Before James could exit the room, Harry was blocking the door. Clutching his toy-wand in one hand, the boy looked solemnly up at James. "I know where Remus is."

Lily looked slightly annoyed. "Harry, Daddy told you to go upstairs. Why didn't you?"

"I wanted to help Remus, Mommy," Harry ran to Lily. "I know where he is. He's near that school floating on the water. Dung stank."

"Dung… stank?" Lily looked at James, both exasperated and amused. "Harry, maybe you should go to bed. Mommy and Daddy need to go talk to Dumbledore."

"Lily," James' voice was strangely quiet. "Hold on. Harry? Did you mean Durmstrang?" Harry shook his head.

"My friend said dung stank. The school floating on water for idiots."

"Lily," James quickly explained, seeing his wife's perplexed expression. "This morning, Snape owled us and told Dumbledore that Voldemort had moved his hideout to the dungeons of Durmstrang. He also said that Karkaroff is now officially a member."

"Oh god…" Lily looked as if she needed a long night's sleep. "Harry… who is this friend? When did you last see him?"

"He's not a real friend," Harry pulled himself up on Lily's lap, glad that his mother wasn't ignoring him now. "He lives in the mirror. He talks to me sometimes. You know, when Ron and the twins aren't over."

* * *

The Next Morning

Remus woke to the tense feeling that there was someone else in the room. Cautiously, he cracked his eyes open a slit. The bed was in better condition than the one at home. For a moment he was disoriented. He was in a room that was much too big… And who was in the room with him?

The light was still dim from the slanting window. A shape hovered before his bed. For a moment Remus thought it was Sirius, but the figure was… short.

His eyes snapped open as he remembered where he was and stared at the child standing by his bed. A moment passed as the two stared at each other. How did he get in? He couldn't have been more than seven years old. One of the most good looking children Remus had ever seen. Sirius… didn't have a nephew or anything… did he?

For although the boy staring passively at him had hair so blond it was almost white, and a far more aristocratic face than Sirius did… they had the same presence. Even gray eyes that made you uneasy without portraying intense emotions. Only… the boy's eyes weren't exactly gray… they were silver. Perhaps it was the lighting, but there seemed to an unearthly quality in those young eyes. This was no normal child.

Finally, the boy spoke up. "So you're the werewolf."

"Um…" Remus pushed himself up, not having an adequate answer. He moved so he was sitting on the bed facing the boy. "That's… right. Who are you?"

"None of your business," the boy replied. It wasn't meant as an insult. The boy merely stated the fact. He crossed his arms, and Remus noticed that the clothes he was wearing looked… very expensive. The silvery silk gave the boy the coloration of an angel. "Where's Black?"

Remus opened his mouth briefly before regaining his composure. "He's uh… in his room."

The boy only stared at him. "This is his room."

When Remus didn't seem to understand, the boy smirked. Remus decided right then that the boy wasn't Sirius' relative, but his clone.

"If you don't believe me, check the wardrobe. Black has things in there that not even _he_ would put in a guest room." The boy looked as if he was enjoying himself.

Hesitantly, Remus stood and ventured to the closet. He braced himself for a moment, then slipped the two large doors open. Color flooded his cheeks and he promptly shut the doors with a clang. He turned towards the boy, heart thudding loudly.

Inside the closet, half hidden beside the formal black and blue robes, resting on some expensive muggle clothes, were several volumes of magazines. Remus only had to peek at the cover to discover what they were about. Three naked young men laid entangled upon black sheets. Not two, three.

"Saw it?" the boy asked in a slightly bored voice. "If it was a guest room, you'd think he'd hide it slightly better."

"Who are you?" Remus asked again, more insistently this time. "How did you get in here?"

"Give a message to Black for me," the child said. "Tell him my Mother is in an emergency situation and needs his help. He'll know who I am. I've got to go, Lupin." As soon as the child said that, the familiar tone speaking his name told Remus who the child was.

"You're Malfoy's son! The one that's living next door," Remus said. "No wonder you remind me of-"

There came the sound of a door being opened down the hall. The boy panicked. He glanced up at Remus and the cockiness was gone from his voice. "He'd kill me," he told Remus in a whispered hush and darted for the bathroom across from the door.

Not knowing what else to do, Remus followed. Intrigued, he watched as the boy pressed both hands to the large mirror that hung on the wall. He whispered something so quickly that Remus couldn't make out the words. Then, as footsteps began approaching Remus' room, the boy's hands began to melt into the mirror.

A key jingled in the lock behind him, and Remus stared, stunned as only a reflection of the blond, silver-eyed boy remained in the mirror. The reflection smirked a very Sirius-like smile at him, then said, "Malfoys aren't addicted to mirrors for no reason."

The door to the room opened, and Remus snapped his head around to see Sirius. As he turned back, the young Malfoy was gone from the mirror.

"Moony?" Sirius asked. "You're awake. I was so angry that I forgot to check in on Narcissa last night, so we need to pay her a visit. Come on."

Remus ignored him and looked back at the mirror. "There was a child here a moment ago, Black," he said idly. "He said his mother's in trouble."

Sirius cursed. The Malfoy brat was here? "Damned, how _is_ he getting in? The windows and doors are locked! Yet he just comes waltzing in! What did he say to you?" He demanded. "He didn't offend you, did he?"

"No, but he told me to look in the closet."

Sirius paled as he remembered the erotic magazines. "Moony, I can explain that. Those are just-"

"You don't have to explain," Remus said calmly. "They have nothing to do with me anyways." He mind was still so otherwise preoccupied that he didn't realize the shadow of anger the crossed over Sirius' face.

Suddenly he found himself pressed against the wall, both hands pinned beside his head. Remus gasped in surprise. Sirius leaned in until his lips were less than an inch away.

"I'd been thinking about what you said last night, Moony," Sirius whispered, breath playing against Remus' mouth. "You said you won't love me again. Well, I'm going to prove you wrong."

* * *

Author's Note: I can't seem to get this chapter the way I want it to go… T-T. I don't know what's wrong with it, aside from the tone being a little different. No worries! Remus as a human is still a virgin. As to why he said that, you can see next chapter.

By the way, I was trying to make children Draco and Harry that would fit into the story that's supposed to come after this one. Were they alright? OOC I know, but were they at least likable? Please review and tell me?

Question: technically, are lemons allowed on I'd read some really erotic ones, and some milder ones, and I'm not sure which fits best in this fic. Anybody have any ideas? (It won't come for a while though)

Night Wolf Vixen: Thank you! But um… I didn't find the overall plot of this story all that dark, maybe it's the way I wrote it in the beginning chapters. (thinks) And Remus being a female werewolf is probably going to be important later on, if I decide to write in the plot concerning the pyrelings. You reviewed before the second chapter was even up. How did that happen? O.o

Can it be? Are my eyes deceiving me? It is! It's _almost_ Sirius hate-mail. O.O… lol. Psychotic? Maybe, but I don't think he's evil. Part of how he acts will be explained later when their past at Hogwarts is revealed. Next chapter.

Apus-Equuleus: (blushes) OMG, I don't think I'd ever been so flattered in my life! You're my favorite reviewer so far. To tell the truth, I began the story to improve grammar, I'm glad it's working. And Remus is still a virgin. He just _thought_ he was raped. That's why he doesn't have some of the touchiness and uncertainty that comes from people actually with those experiences.

Lost and by the wind grieved: Thanks!

Nightmare-chan22: Yay! I have a fan! Well, the whole werewolf thing just couldn't be glazed over, you know? And I agree, Remus is soooo pretty as a wolf.

FlamencoPenguin: Wow, Sirius is really getting on people's nerves. This is his second hate-mail. Well, Remus isn't _that_ strong, but it's just that I kinda dislike the fics that portray him as weak willed and giving in as soon as someone snogs him.

Freya: Yup yup, you didn't misunderstand the paragraphs, but those are entirely from Remus' point of view. There will be a _long_ flashback next chapter. I promise.

Emma Lupin: I have now come to terms with the fact that I seem to have an original story plot. O.o Thanks so much!

Andie12: I think this chapter is the longest one yet, and I still didn't get through all the content that I meant to cover. This is a relief. I thought everyone 'disliked' Sirius in this fic. When really he's just… misunderstood.

Alpha2nd2003: Funny? Hm… Remus would kill you if he heard you say that. And nah, I failed both math and physics and had to retake them in summer school. I wouldn't call that smart…

Remusnsirus4eva: I agree! They rock! And of course Remus is going to fall in love. (Hm… technically, the love is already there, they just have to um… cope)

OrA-ShiNi-gi: Right right! Wait, what am I agreeing to? I agree, poor Remus. Hate to be him… wait a moment, what am I talking about! A lot of fan girls would _kill_ to be him! (I hope)

Potter Mania: A lot of people seems to be wondering about that. It'll all be cleared up the next chapter. You guys will definitely hate the ministry. (and NO Remus wasn't raped by anyone from the ministry)

Larka: One long chapter coming up! Or… had just come up… hm… Yup, I thought I better put the R-rated violence warning there.

YamikiofAnime: Well… not _now_ but… um… now?

Tiff ashley: (blushes) not the best fic EVER for sure. But I've been getting a lot more reviews than I expected.

Tiffany: Well, then, here it is! (cackles evilly)

Their love is so Canon: Er… as long as I don't get blamed for your death. And um… Sirius had been with several people during the seven years. BUT I SWEAR HE'S NOT A PLAYER IN ANY WAY! And I agree with you in that, even if their love is not canon… IT SHOULD BE (cries)

Next Chapter: The Snow-flavored Scarf

Mikril-dey


	4. The Snow flavored Scarf

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: R… I think for almost rape in the second half of the flashback

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, drama

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 4: The Snow-flavored Scarf 

And Sirius Black _had_ thought about Remus' words all night. At first, the painful repetition of '_I'm not going to make the same mistake again_' drove him nearly insane. It was like a broken stereo he couldn't turn off.

That line played again… and again… and again accompanied with the occasional '_I loved you once_' and visual images of that pale delicate face streaked with tears. Sirius had lost count of how many times his heart broke that night. Once close to midnight, Sirius had an insane urge to go to the other room and pull his mate into an embrace. All he knew that it was only safe when he had Remus with him. Who knew what's happening to Remus while he laid there sleeping?

He laughed bitterly to himself. What a joke.

Sirius made it as far as Remus' door. He couldn't bring himself to enter. So he sat down beside the entrance, basked in the utter darkness of the night. That's when the other things Remus had said began to sink in.

Merlin… if Remus was right and this wasn't love… if love was stronger than this… it must surely be an instrument of torture. He had spent every waking moment of the past seven years plotting for this day, every dreaming night envisioning what he now owned. Sirius brought his knees up.

But did he want this? This bitter, anger-filled Remus that he didn't know how to handle? He was so different from the slightly shy, haunted boy he had fallen in love with in third year. Sirius gritted his teeth.

He had always been alone. The Blacks were never big on family. His Father and Mother both joined Voldemort when he was very young. He couldn't understand why he often didn't see them for weeks on end. He had been raised by the house elves.

And when he had gotten friendly with the tiny creatures, his parents had punished him. They killed all of them… all of the house elves but one. Kreature had been a horror, and he took care of Sirius until school began. Every chance he got, Kreature insulted him, trampled his toys, broken the things he made, and killed the flowers he had planted outside the manor.

Father and Mother were home more often as he turned ten. Sirius wasn't sure if it was a good thing. Although he'd always wanted to know the two adults, the first thing they did was kill his small barn owl and got him a jet black one instead.

_"Don't associate with mudblood."_… _"They are dirty, lower than dirt. Treat them like they are." _…_ "Anything you want, just take. It is your right." _… _"The Slytherins are the only ones worth talking to, the rest are idiots."_ Those words had been beaten into him for two years before he went to Hogwarts. He went calmly, assured that he and the purebloods were the only ones entitled to go. The other first years had scattered before him like water upon rocks, and even the older students had been slightly apprehensive of his cold face and upright manner.

But then the first person he ran into had been Remus Lupin. The shy boy had apologized quickly, eyeing his expensive robes, angry face and the ferocious looking owl in his cage. Then, Remus had given him the brightest smile he had ever seen, told him he looked very 'proper,' and ran off.

Thinking back, Sirius decided that might very well have been the turning point in his life. Searching for the tawny haired boy later on the train, he had refused to sit with the older Lucius Malfoy, or even Severus Snape, with his passive face and grim set mouth. Instead, he had ran into James Potter, gotten into a fight, and then decided they were the best friends in the world.

Suddenly, a question popped into his mind. If he had to start over, would he? If he was taken back seven years… back to the day of Hogwart's Graduation. He'd ignored the Restraining Order and spell the Ministry had placed on the two of them, pinned the werewolf against the wall on Platform 9¾, and told him that no matter how long it took, Remus would be his.

No. He wouldn't. Even now, there was no other way he could've done it. No matter what, Remus was now bound to him as surely as the moon was bound to the night sky. That was all that mattered… wasn't it? He would get Remus to love him in time.

'_I'm not going to make the same mistake again._'

"Well you bloody well are," Sirius muttered. "If there's one thing we have, it's time. You're stubborn, Moony, but I don't believe you can last a lifetime."

And perhaps he would try… some of that true love stuff Remus was talking about. Sirius pulled out the scarf again, burying his face in it.

It smelled like snow.

* * *

Flashback

It smelled like snow and the winter of third year. They were just marauders then. Newly triumphant from creating the Marauder's Map and drunk on themselves. Sirius remembered that Peter had complained about the homework Professor Karkaroff had given. Four feet on the uses and misuses of Gillyweed on a Hogsmead weekend had been too much. Most of the students were considering not doing it, and the rare couple like Remus had stayed up the night before, finishing the essay.

Remus swayed on his feet and had to steady himself on the counter of Honeydukes. When the other three stared at him, he grinned sheepishly. "I'm never going to look at Gillyweed in the same way again."

Sirius snorted and felt an annoyance build up in him. He put an arm around both Remus and James, dragging both to the nearest table, then pulled a chair for Peter. "Now," he said, "we're going to call for the biggest Butterbeers they have. Then I'll swap mine with Frank for Firewhisky."

James groaned and his head hit the table. He, too, had stayed up the night before, but not for Potions. He had drooled over the photo of the Shooting Star in _Quiditch for all ages_ late into the night. Finally, Remus couldn't stand anymore. He transfigured the magazine into a Muggle Studies text book, and James fell asleep trying to find some resemblance between the two.

Sirius had laughed his head off and said Professor Dumbledore would've been proud enough to excuse Remus from ever doing homework in Transfiguration again.

Then a hush fell over the room as Karkaroff entered with his son. Malfoy, who never got less than perfect in Potions, followed in. He was four years above them, and liked to strut around Hogwarts as if he owned it.

"Well the worse thing about my third years is the _marking_," Karkaroff's voice was loud. The sound of gritted teeth could be heard throughout the room, as every student secretly plotted fantasy revenges. "I think I'll just give them any score then, after all. I _know_ who's going to fail already."

"Indeed," Malfoy had said coolly. The younger Karkaroff, who assisted his father in Potion classes, only shrugged.

"I've some free time, Dad, let me mark."

And that was worse than the essays not getting marked at all. Igor Karkaroff was famous for the insults he enjoys writing. Several first year girls had burst into tears after the first time he marked.

Sirius looked at Remus, who had trouble keeping his eyes open, and stood up.

"Padfoot, where are you going?" Peter asked. James stopped the chubby boy without opening his eyes or raising his head from the table.

"Leave him, he's just going to give Karkaroff a taste of his own medicine." Sighing, James tiredly fished out his invisibility cloak from his robe pocket. Just in case.

"Professor," they heard Sirius said politely. "I was just wondering. What if I told you that one of your students had made someone from a lower year do their Potions homework for them? What would you say?"

"Which student, Black?" Karkaroff said in distaste. "I'll dock a hundred points from their House."

"And then he would _Incendio_ their pants," the younger Karkaroff added helpfully.

"I see," Sirius said thoughtfully, a manic gleam in his eyes. Malfoy, as if sensing the impending danger, had backed away from the two teachers. Sirius pointed his wand. "_Incendio!_"

At first nothing happened. Sirius looked vaguely disappointed as the elder Karkaroff began to laugh.

"What makes you think you can cast a fifth year spell, Black?" Professor Karkaroff sneered. "Ten points from Gryffindor for trying to set fire to a teacher and another ten for pure stupidity."

"Black," Malfoy sneered. "You'd think messing up a spell too often would give you a hint already."

But Sirius only grinned. "Take a good, _long_ look at Karkaroff, Malfoy."

The Potions professor immediately checked his robe, to find a stead flame slowly eating its way up his pant leggings. It sampled his cloak with the deliberate ease of a cat, then dug in.

A moment passed before Karkaroff began screaming. Sirius was laughing so hard that he was having trouble standing upright. Remus had finally woken completely and watched in vague regret. "Guess all my Potions work last night was for nothing," he sighed. "He's not going to collect assignment now."

Karkaroff, unfortunately, had the last laugh. As Sirius turned to head back to their table, Karkaroff leaped on top of the fourteen-year-old's back and tried to strangle him. The joke backfired, and Sirius found his own clothes burning up as he struggled free from the professor.

Sirius cursed as he cast off his burning cloak and the other three marauders hastily dragged him out of the store. They tore down the street through the thickly falling snow, and the cold bit them hard.

"That was bloody brilliant," James laughed as they ran. "Did you see Karkaroff's face?"

Sirius grinned, the beginnings of a shiver coursing through him. He turned to Remus. "How about you? What did you think, mate?"

Remus pretended to think. "Well, I think I'll file my essay in with my other study guides. You do everything too thoroughly, Padfoot."

Hoping that it was a compliment, Sirius couldn't control his shivers as they jogged down through Hogsmead. Peter had began ranting about how great Sirius had been to be able to pull off a spell most fifth years couldn't manage. No big surprise there, Peter was impressed by anything and everything. But the main question was… what did Remus _really _think?

They stopped when Honeydukes grew out of sight. Remus, walking behind, was suddenly aware of how cold out it was. He pull off his white scarf and looped it around Sirius' neck from behind. He smiled apologetically as the taller boy turned to look at him, a touch of surprise in his eyes. "Sorry, I don't have a spare cloak."

James took the hint and gave Sirius his spare. "Er… Sorry Padfoot. Didn't notice."

"Well, that's why I love Moony more," Sirius threw his arm around Remus' shoulder and winked.

"Prat," Remus chided and they continued walking. Sirius shrugged on the cloak, fingers brushing over the scarf. He felt warm, but not because of the clothes. The scarf still had Remus' heat.

An strange feeling rose up in him. He hurriedly caught up to Remus. "Moony, you're not angry, are you? You worked really hard on that essay."

"Padfoot, you're a pyromaniac, course I'm not mad." Remus' quiet laughter sent a tingle all the way down Sirius' spine. "I'm just relieved that you didn't burn down the entire store. I _adore_ their Butterbeer."

That was the first time Sirius Black questioned his sexuality.

End Flashback

* * *

Morning

His libido was screaming at him. He had the most beautiful creature in the world pinned against the wall, almost every inch of their body touching through the clothes. And Remus, for the first time since they met, couldn't knock him unconscious with werewolf strength. Not that Remus ever _used _his inhuman power, but the nagging doubt had always been in Sirius' mind. He licked his lips.

"I'd been thinking about what you said last night, Moony," Sirius whispered, breath playing against Remus' mouth. "You said you won't love me again. Well, I'm going to prove you wrong."

That didn't come out the way he'd wanted it to. He'd wanted to at least _mention_ what Remus said about 'true love,' but he'd spoken before he thought things through.

And who could blame him? Remus could be very distracting without knowing it. His hair was slightly longer than at Hogwarts, gently brushing against Sirius' face. Wide haunting eyes… there had always been something strange about them… almost unearthly.

All throughout first year, when Remus was a quiet book worm that sat at the back of every class and buried his head in books most other hours, Sirius had a fantasy that Remus was some sort of angel he'd read about in muggle stories. Angels that stepped into somebody's life, changed it, then left laughing.

Perhaps that had been the roots of his insecurities. That was what inspired him to invite Remus into their little circle of friends after a summer of contemplation. It always felt as if the smaller boy would float away…

Sirius pressed in closer. "If," he said softly, "I kissed you right now… What would you do."

Remus' mouth opened and he was about to say something, but no words came out, so Sirius took the chance to plunge himself into the other's warmth. It was as if a flood gate had opened.

If Remus resisted, Sirius didn't notice. His hands had tightened, wrapping themselves around slender wrists. The inside of his mate's mouth wasn't as sweet as he'd hoped, but Sirius hardly cared.

It was better than Heaven. The warmth… the softness… Sirius' mind went blank and all he could think about was the warmth… with a knowledge that sat embedded within him.

It was Remus he was kissing. Remus who noticed everyone in History of Magic and copied extra sets of notes for those that fell asleep. Remus who was willing to listen to Peter blabber for hours about his Ravenclaw crush, but couldn't even bring himself to tell anyone about being a werewolf. Who was liked by everyone in school, even Malfoy, but was still scared of making anyone hate him.

Remus who knew exactly what to say in any situation to make those around him feel better, but kept his every trouble to himself. Who Sirius was sure loved him in Hogwarts, but had somehow been driven away.

_Me too, Moony, me too._ He released Remus' wrist and wrapped his arm around the slim waist that still fit perfectly against his. _I'm not going to make the same mistake again_.

He brushed past Remus' tongue, doing a sweeping search of the other's mouth. The strength went out of the smaller man. Sirius paused for a moment, uncertain about the new acceptance, then decided it must be spawned from their bond.

Touching the tip of his tongue to Remus' small, immobile one, Sirius swirled under it, trying to stir it into motion. He played with it, teased it for a moment, before breaking the kiss.

There was an unreadable expression in those golden eyes as Remus fought to catch his breath. Sirius leaned his forehead down against Remus' and locked their gazes. "What if I made love to you right now," Sirius tried again. "Would you oppose? What would you do?"

His eyes were tender, and there was a new smile on his face that Remus had not seen before. There was no more smirk, no more laughter. At that moment, everything about Sirius Black was gentle, so much so that it was unlike him.

Remus bit his lips, and released a long breath. "I would say I don't want it. Do you care about me enough to respect that?"

Sirius stumbled back as if he had been shot and Remus sagged backwards against the wall. Remus felt a whisper of fear course through him as the taller man's eyes narrowed. He had not been expecting an answer like that. Who in their right mind could've refused… just when-

He shook his head in bewilderment. Clever, clever Remus. He had not only stopped the incredible atmosphere of lust… he'd also brought up last night's topic again. Anger surged up in him. Why was life so damned difficult?

"Fine," he snapped, "but you'd better not make me wait too long, Moony. I can't say what I would do."

Remus was startled as the white scarf was shoved into his hands. "Wha-"

"When you came with me yesterday, you didn't really want to, did you?" Sirius asked harshly. His heart fell when Remus shook his head dumbly. "Suspected so. I thought about what happened yesterday too, and I think that bloody scarf helps you resist me. Do whatever you want with it. Now, just get dressed in some of my things so we can go next door for breakfast."

Sirius stormed from the room. The door slammed. Slowly, Remus allowed himself to sink down against the wall. What to do… what was left to do? He couldn't last like this. Resist the bond once… twice… he'd use up the remainder of his willpower. In the end, he had to submit.

Reality was a physical pain. He can't keep this up forever. What little defense he had against Sirius' kiss was the ultimate proof. He'd been so sure he could push away, but when he'd tried, the bond had drained him dry.

It was like a living creature, taunting him, willing him to submit… sooner or later, he would give… Sirius would be gracious about it… or not…

After all… it was probably the only thing the man wanted.

* * *

Flashback: Christmas of Seventh Year

After they'd became lovers, Sirius had pulled the trick, telling Snape about Remus' transformation at the end of sixth year. He wouldn't talk about what happened over the summer, except that when he came back, there had been a sort of… darkness in him. When he smirks, it was no longer an innocent children's joke, but something deeper… more malicious.

Only Remus and some Ministry officials knew why. He was a registered werewolf by then, and as a result, what would've been an innocent joke had been a crime serious enough to land him in Azkaban. Sirius had stayed there for the two months of summer, it was a miracle he hadn't lost his mind.

Remus and Dumbledore had spent countless hours arguing with the Ministry over the case of Sirius Black, finally clearing his name and allowing him to come back to Hogwarts. Sirius had been so grateful he turned almost Remus-like in habits. Time normally spent plotting pranks had been devoted to studies.

James, too, had dove into the books in an effort to please his new girlfriend. In all essence, the Marauders, though still bond by their love for one another, had dispersed.

That was when Sirius asked if they could mate, two weeks before the Christmas dance. Remus had refused his lover and they had broken up on bad terms. It was hard to deny that he had fallen in love with the older boy, but werewolf bonds seldom had anything to do with love.

Sirius wasn't a submissive, and even if he was, the Ministry would never have let them mate due to the scandal in sixth year. There would be unforeseen side-effects if such a mating was to take place. And Sirius had no idea what becoming a werewolf entailed. Remus couldn't do that to someone he loved.

_"I'm sorry, Padfoot. I- I love you, but I can't say yes. I'm… going to search for a normal mating."_

Remus snapped back into himself. "I'm sorry, Snape. What did you say?"

"I asked if you had any plans for after Graduation," Snape snorted. Remus shook his head. There were no plans. Despite being one of the top wizards in the school, there was no place for a werewolf to go.

"You could always get a job here," Snape said. "Professor Dumbledore talked to me about teaching here."

"But Snape, you don't like kids," Remus wondered. He and the other boy had became good friends since the incident. Despite what most might think, Snape did not tell anyone, nor did he taunt Remus for his abnormality. He was grateful. Especially since Sirius and he had grown apart after his rejection, Remus needed a friend. "How can you teach without liking kids."

"Of course I can teach without liking them," Snape snapped. "It isn't as if I have to _like_ them to mark their tests. In fact…"

"Don't tell me you're teaching Potions," Remus groaned. "You're turning into another Karkaroff."

Snape's eyes flashed. "To tell you the truth, Hogwarts was the only home I'd ever known."

"Me too," Remus said softly. A hand landed on his shoulder and Remus jerked around, surprised. There was James with Lily, both dressed in coordinated colors and no doubt the most striking couple at the ball. There was a light in their eyes that almost made Remus jealous.

"Hey Moony," James laughed, and Remus noticed that his tie was loose. For Christmas that year, the school had decided on formal dress, with suits and ties. "Listen, Lily and I are going back to the dorm. Peter left a while ago. Get yourself back safely, you hear?"

"Yes sir," Remus mocked a salute. He sighed as James and Snape exchanged a mutual look of dislike.

"See you, Severus," Lily smiled at the boy, and the two left.

"Yeah, I'll be going too," Snape reached out a patted Remus' hand. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

As Snape left, Remus drowned another butterbeer. Teaching job… perhaps it was worth considering. He wasn't bad with children. But… what school would hire a werewolf? Dumbledore could only change so much…

* * *

Rated R for almost non-con

Remus stepped out of the ball late. There was a slight chill in the air and the corridors were entirely empty. The Christmas ball had been so jovial, Remus couldn't leave. He had watched other couples kiss, whisper sweet words and coveted.

The loneliness hit him again as soon as he was out of sight of people. He'd never admit it, but night after night, he envisioned what life might've been like if he was selfish. If he had decided to, not mate with Sirius, but become lovers anyway. But no… the Ministry would never allow it.

Just as he passed a classroom, his arm was grabbed. Remus turned, shocked. Sirius stood behind him, obviously slightly drunk and angry.

"Padfoot?"

He didn't reply. Sirius pushed Remus into the empty classroom, closing and locking the door behind him. His dark robes seemed as black as his hair in the dim light.

"Padfoot? What- what are you doing?" Remus asked, fear beginning to rise in his chest. Sirius turned, gray eyes flinty with anger.

"Do you really want do drive me insane?" He hissed, hands grabbing Remus' shoulders. The werewolf could only gape, stunned at the other as he was shaken. "Why is it him? Why!"

What was Sirius saying? "I-"

Remus flinched as Sirius raised a hand to caress his face. He was too shocked to summon up werewolf strength. "I really want to beat you up, Moony, you know that? I _should_ beat you up. But I can't do it… Moony…"

Before Remus could react, Sirius had pressed him up against the classroom wall, lips fastened together. His mind went blank, and the thought of using werewolf strength never even occurred to him. Unsurprising, considering how little he'd thought about his transformation in his life.

At first he had resisted, but was no match in strength. He couldn't escape the embrace, nor those lips as Sirius pushed against him in an almost crazed frenzy.

Gradually… under the onslaught, Remus weakened. His hands, before trying to push the other away, now clung on to the other's robes. Merlin… how he missed Sirius' kisses.

As Sirius pulled his face away, Remus' lips almost followed him.

Noticing his own actions, he flushed, trying to back away. Sirius only put more weight on him, crushing them even closer together. Remus breathed heavily, unable to look up.

"Merlin… I've waited so long," Sirius panted. He tipped Remus' face upwards, watching the slightly swollen lips and shy eyes with a hint of satisfaction. "You have too, haven't you? You're not going to run anymore."

His thumb traced across Remus' lips. There was a tender plea in his eyes. "Say it. Say you'll be with me forever."

"I…" Desperately, Remus shook his head, trying to loosen the confusion inside him. He had almost let go of himself then, said the word that would probably have made Sirius and him miserable for the rest of their lives. If Sirius had to hate someone, let it be him and not the Ministry. "No! I said it clearly that night! I'm- I'm going to look for a normal mating-"

"_What_ normal mating?" Sirius roared, losing control. "You want a _normal_ mating? What about now? _Don't_ tell me Severus Snape is a submissive!"

"You're mis-" Remus tried to cut in. Sirius interrupted furiously.

"If you'd found yourself a girl, or a submissive, I might've been able to stand it. It's the normal mating you'd always wanted. But now you're with _Snivellus_! How do you explain that? He's a dominant, and he's involved in what happened last year too! Is this what you call _normal_?"

He paused to catch his breath. Remus swallowed hard.

"Padfoot, we're not like that…" His voice was weak, and there was a tremor of fear echoing around it.

"You're lying!" Sirius said icily. "Don't think I haven't noticed. You aren't as cold to him as before. Last Wednesday he lent you his textbook. Saturday he walked you back to the dorm. You bloody _smiled_ at him! He let you use his _cloak_ just yesterday! And he- he bloody touched your hand just now and you didn't even react."

Sirius had noticed. Remus, unexplainably, felt a thrill.

Drawing closer, Sirius' steel-like fingers trapped Remus' chin. "So tell me, Moony. If you aren't lovers, how did you two get so close?"

"I-" What, did he want the truth? Did he want to hear that Remus was so upset about him that he wasn't sure what was going on most of the time?

"I don't understand," Sirius said bitterly. "We're both dominants, both involved in what happened last year. Why would you choose him over me? You don't love me anymore?"

"Exactly," Remus spat. Injustice rose up in him. What right did Sirius have? He'd explained it only too well the other night! Sirius should've understood! Remus couldn't do this to someone he loved. That would cut off all of Sirius' future! Every job, every privilege given to wizards would be gone!

Sirius' eyes were wide, almost beast-like in the dimness. Bloodshot… half-crazed eyes stared at Remus in fury.

And then, he smirked. Not the child Sirius' happy, mischievous smirk. It was dark… the uneven tilt of his lips was no longer attractive, but eerie. "Really. But you still like my kisses. Your body's more honest than you are."

Sirius' spare hand left Remus' face and loosened his tie.

An evil premonition floated over the werewolf. "Padfoot, let me go! What are you doing? What do you want?"

Grabbing both of Remus' wrists, Sirius looped the length of cloth around them, tying a tight knot. He then reached for his own tie. "I'm sorry, Moony. You're forcing me. Don't lie! I can't stand this Moony! You're not just hurting me, you're hurting yourself as well!"

"You're insane!" Remus cried as soon as the implications sank in. "No! Padfoot! You can't do this! Help! Somebody! He-mmmmph."

The other tie went around his mouth. Remus felt Sirius settle between his legs and a mouth drew his ear into a warm cavern.

Tears began to trickle in the chill of the classroom. His head was pounding. There were black spots before his vision. Sirius' embrace had been safe… the only place where he could give himself away and forget that he was a werewolf. In those arms, he was just another boy, desperately in love and fantasizing about a 'happily ever after.'

Sirius gingerly sucked on his neck, nuzzling against him. One hand slipped under his robe and onto his chest, the other undid Remus' belt.

Remus waited, half unconscious from the great anguish in his chest, but Sirius didn't move anymore. He was pressed against a warm, broad chest. He could feel Sirius begin to cry as well. Remus head spun, and what happened next was a blur. Bits and pieces of emotions, sensations, smells and darkness melted together to form a painful memory.

"It's not fair, Moony," Sirius ground out. "I want you… I want to be with you… it's not much to ask for. I only want one thing in this life… one bloody thing! How can they say no!"

"Mmm…" Remus' voice drifted off. His head hurt. The tie was still in his mouth, and his wrists were still painfully enclosed in their restraints. But it was so warm… Sirius smelled like the sea… so vast… enveloping him.

"Take anything," Sirius murmured. "I'll let you take anything. Just… not him. Merlin… please… let him stay. I can't hurt him… I'll kill myself if anything happened to him…"

There was silence.

* * *

Remus had woken up much like he did when he was mated, back held against Sirius' chest, possessive arms wrapped around him. The only difference was he was still bound and gagged. He wasn't awake for very long before the teachers burst into the room, waking Sirius. 

Sirius had attacked one of the teachers as they took him away, but with his wand thrown halfway across the room, there wasn't much of a fight.

Remus was taken to the school infirmary. There, he was told by several Ministry officials that he had been raped. That was strange though, Remus didn't remember anything. They had asked if he wanted to do anything about it, and Remus had said no.

So instead, the Ministry had put a restraining order on Sirius Black. If he came within ten meters of Remus, he would experience intense pain equal to that of the Cruciatus curse.

James and Peter, as well as the rest of the school had wanted to know the true story after being told that Black and Lupin had hexed each other into oblivion. But neither Sirius nor Remus said anything. James' friendship with both of them prevailed, but Peter had gradually drifted away. Life had became relatively normal after he had been raped.

Nobody had suspected anything until Sirius showed the world he was a Death Eater just like his parents. Exactly one year after that Christmas Dance.

End of R-rated Section and Flashback

* * *

That was the memory that washed through Remus as he opened the closet for the second time that morning, scarf wound tightly around his neck. Carefully, disgustedly, he lifted the magazines out of the way, setting them with the backside down so he wouldn't have to accidentally see the erotic photographs and instead, see a strange tube-like device with buttons on it. Remus decided he really did _not_ want to know what it was used for. 

Sirius, as usually, wore robes carefully tailored to fit him only. Unfortunately, that leaves little option for Remus. In the end, he was still the object of silent ridicule as he stepped inside the Malfoy household.

Narcissa was waiting by the door, face beet red from anger. Her perfect golden hair was in disarray and she had her wand gripped in one hand. Remus looked around and spotted the little boy he'd seen that morning on the sofa.

"Despicable," Narcissa said. Remus looked back at her, to realize that she was eyeing his oversized robes disdainfully. "I do believe you're living off my cousin. Can't even afford to buy your own robes, I see."

"What's the problem?" Sirius asked in annoyance, voice low and dangerous. Narcissa shot him an enraged look.

"What's the problem? The problem?" She said fiercely. "You've _ruined_ our house. I should never have helped you! You and your stupid addiction to werewolves. You have _no idea_ how much it shames me that you're part of my family."

"Yes, of course," Sirius said amusedly. "Now, then, _where_ is the problem?"

"My bathroom! My favorite bathroom is _ruined_ from your muggle dyes. It should've been a nice light green, and now it looks like _birds_ had lived there! Ugh! The white dyes looks _horrid_!"

And that erased any misgivings Remus had towards the woman. He couldn't restrain the small smile that rose on his lips. Sirius sighed in exasperation before turning to the small boy lounging on the sofa.

"And Malfoy," he said. "Why were you in my room this morning?"

"Your reading material is better every time I check, Black." The corners of the boy's mouth lifted in a smirk. Black looked at him in disgust.

"Draco," Narcissa snapped. "Don't smirk. It's not becoming on a Malfoy. You're starting to act just like Black." She peered suspiciously at Sirius. "What reading material?"

"If you're concerned, find a way to keep your son out of my house," Sirius said. "Come on, Moony."

"Oh no," Narcissa gasped. "He's not coming with us. I'm not letting a werewolf upstairs. He might, I don't know, scratch my satin curtains or something. Are his nails trimmed?"

Remus had the sudden urge to bang his head against the nearest wall. What kind of a question was 'are his nails trimmed'? Not that he was particularly angry. Narcissa, although insulting, was quite… eccentric. She didn't say anything about Remus being a dark creature and might be repulsive or dangerous, but she was worried about her _curtains_.

"Moony's not staying down here with your brat," Sirius said. "Either he comes up with us, or I'm not going up."

"Just clean the bloody bath, Black," the boy sat up. "I'm going getting something to eat." He left the room and Remus made a point to sit down on the couch, staring Sirius coolly in the eyes when disbelieving eyes turned on him.

Their gazes held for a moment, before Sirius sighed and disappeared with Narcissa upstairs. A moment later, the water started running and Remus could hear the woman shriek. "You- you're not expecting me to _use_ that! That's house-elvish!"

"Mother's very excitable," said the boy, who had wandered out from the kitchen with a scone in one hand. "Thank Merlin I take after Father."

Remus smiled weakly, letting himself sink backwards into the sofa. "Taking after Lucius Malfoy isn't a good thing either, ah… I think Narcissa called you Draco."

"It's Malfoy," the boy flopped down on the other side of the couch. "I don't let just anyone call my first name. And why not? Father's a perfectly talented, respected pureblood. He got me a broom for my birthday, you know?"

A furious scrubbing sound began upstairs. Obviously Narcissa couldn't resist her cousin's charm.

There was a slightly defensive edge to the child's voice, and Remus couldn't help but narrow his eyes. "Draco, I'm going to ask you a question."

"Malfoy" Draco finished the scone and scowled, but Remus noticed that he had moved in closer, as if secretly craving company.

"Did your father stay to teach you how to ride the broom? Does he or your mother read you stories, or take you on outings?" Remus remembered how miserable he had felt after Sirius had told the marauders about his childhood. Perhaps this was a trend amongst Death Eater children.

"That's a very stupid question," Draco decided. "Stories are for idiots. They can't deal with the present, so they hide away. And I have to be strong and learn how to fly on my own."

"And have you?"

"Flying is a very delicate process, of course not," Draco snorted. "I have learned how to mount the broom."

Remus frowned. Poor boy. For all his arrogance and pride in his family, he seemed just as lonely as Sirius was when he first went to Hogwarts. Edging closer, he peered at Draco's face cautiously. The child didn't back away.

"I could teach you how to ride if you'd like," he offered. "I'm no expert though."

Draco snorted. "I don't need it. I can figure it out on my own. I certainly don't need flying lessons from a _werewolf_. It's not becoming of a Malfoy. You're not even pureblood-"

"Draco," Remus said quietly. "I would like to teach you how to fly. I happen to like children."

For a moment, the boy stared at him blankly, as if he had never seen an adult who liked children before. Uncomfortable, he said, "Malfoys learn things on their own."

"What about the mirror travel from this morning?" Remus asked. "Did your father teach you that?"

Silence.

"Draco?"

"It's Malfoy!" Draco forced. "And _no_ he didn't teach me. You better not tell Black about it! I haven't told anyone!"

"So I'm the only one that knows?" Remus asked in surprise. "Thank you. Of course I won't tell him."

"Don't thank me," Draco snorted. "You're not the first one. I hate you as much as I hate Black."

"No you don't."

"Moony," Remus looked up at Sirius. "Why are you talking to Malfoy's brat?" The taller man eyed the boy with distaste, then purposefully sat down between them. Draco stiffened, immediately leaping off the couch. Without waiting for an answer, Sirius swung an arm around his mate's shoulder.

Draco looked between the two adults and his small face withdrew. Eyes cold, he crossed his arms in front of him. "You're really disgustingly weak against the bond, aren't you, Lupin?"

Sirius stood angrily, he knew without looking that Remus was hurt by that statement. "Malfoy, you and I need to talk. Let's go to the kitchen."

"Why?" Draco frowned. "What do you want?" Nevertheless, the boy followed Sirius into the adjacent room. The Malfoy house elf was there, wringing out a piece of cloth. When he saw Sirius, the house elf's face twisted in an ugly expression and he scampered out of the room.

Draco had always wondered about that house elf.

"Now, Malfoy," Sirius started. "Let's get the rules clear. You are not to say _anything_ that would insult or hurt him in any way. In fact, it's better if you stay away from him."

"Fine, I don't want to waste my time talking to werewolves anyway." Draco looked away angrily. Of course he didn't care. Even if the kindly man had been the first adult to smile at him, give him a word of comfort… he was still a werewolf. Nothing to be sad over. Nothing at all. When he looked back, Sirius was looking at him with an almost amused expression.

"After you've learned to keep a civil tongue, _then_ you can ask Moony to teach you to fly. Really, Malfoy, you're giving Death Eater children a bad name. Even _I_ wasn't a spoiled bastard yet at seven years old."

Seeing the shocked expression on the boy's face, Sirius ran a hand through his hair. "You were surprisingly decent when talking to him, though I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. Why did you say that, Malfoy?"

Draco sulked, mumbling something under his breath.

"What was that?"

"It's bloody unfair," Draco mumbled. "You've done bad things too. And someone still likes you."

"That doesn't give you the right to insult others," Sirius' hand was on the door back to the living room. "When you learn to be agreeable as well as intolerable, people may start to like you."

The moment he entered the living room again, Sirius knew something was wrong. For one, Remus had opened the window, and was staring out into the bright sun of the late morning. The light projected a golden, almost halo-like air around him. Sirius' heart pounded loudly and he was rendered breathless by the sight.

Then he saw the figure hovering outside the window. Untamed black hair cascaded over his scalp, and the man stared at him with a confused mixture of enmity and warmth.

"Padfoot," James said emotionlessly. "We have your house completely surrounded. Please surrender, or we'll be forced to use force."

* * *

Author's Note: Um… sorry about this chapter being slightly bland at times, it's supposed to be kinda mainly flashbacks and stuff. As you'll notice, it doesn't advance the plot much. There's going to be action next chapter though. Darn… I wanted this part to be touching and everything, but bah, I can't write emotions well.

Er… hope you guys don't mind the almost rape part… It's just… Sirius' been in Azkaban, been rejected, felt betrayed, and plus, he's drunk. If it was me, I'd probably flip, not to mention Sirius.

I sorta pictured Draco as one of those really rare, mature kids that I teach on Saturday. There was this seven year old kid that has a secret sort-of crush on his classmate and can out-talk me in philosophy… o.O… hope I got that across…

Holly: Er… Their mating really isn't natural because of many reasons, and Remus being a female werewolf is part of it. So, it's kinda important to the plot. Sorry about that, but I can't change that aspect.

TravellerMK: Weee! I hope I didn't overlook any plot holes. I dunno, I've usually seen Remus as being the sub… even though he's the werewolf. And no, you make perfect sense! He's not submissive because he's weak-willed or anything, in fact, I think he may be even more strong willed than Sirius.

Cindered-hope: ' (eheh…) Thank you.

Apus-Equuleus: See? (points) Remus wasn't raped. And I think this one's even more of an interlude than the last one. And er… actually part of it is Sirius' fault too, and also Remus' fault, partly the Ministry's fault, but mostly just a matter of circumstances. Of course he's not _that_ dark! And that reminds me! I need to reveal more about Sirius' background and stuff, thx! Besides, I think they came a long ways this chapter, although it's not too obvious. Remus _obviously_ doesn't know what he wants… And no I haven't seen Meteor Garden, but I've read a lot of fanfiction that base themselves off that. (they're mostly slash too though) You're right, they are very similar. Thank you so much! I was swooning when I read your review.

Potter Mania: A little darker? O.o… Hm… I actually don't think his personality overall in this fic is really all that dark… I'll see what I can do. He's supposed to be likable, but not good, you know what I mean?

Nightmare-chan22: Hey, I object! I'm _supposed_ to be leaving cliffies! (laughs) Hard to get… hm… Sirius is getting _really_ frustrated, isn't he? I hope I don't disappoint anyone… (worries). Don't worry, I'm _sure_ that you're my ultimate fan! Cheers!

Tiffany: Oh, I think it'll take _more_ than butt kissing… Thank you! Technically, that's how werewolf matings are though. They're universally based more on dominance and lust than affection.

OrA-ShiNi-gi: First comment on Draco! Yay! I'll update as soon as I can.

Ophel: Lemon definitely… Poor Moony's in for it. All the readers are plotting against him.

TeeDee: Stay strong! It won't be that long!

Vixen-Ra: (ponders) what kind of action? Romance action? Magic duelling action? Opposition to their love kind of action? I think the latter two would come first though, so if you wanted more relationship stuff, be patient. (grins and withholds romance) Wait… that kinda defeats the purpose of this being a romance fic…

Alpha2nd2003: Yup, that's right. You'll see why Draco's helping Harry next chapter.  


Their love is so Canon: O.O… 'hen-pecked' hubby?… (checks to see if that fits in the story) I luv that! Lol! As to why James never mentioned the secret keeper thing in this fic will be explained later. Actually, I don't think Dumbledore is as powerful as most people seem to think. I picture him as this little old man that loves his students very much, but can only use the powers he has to make things easier for them. You have no idea how hard it is not to write short chapters. (giggles nervously)

Amaroq: Lol. Glad you liked it. The transformation part made me cringe when I wrote it. It was _really_ violent, wasn't it? And of course I'll continue! I luv you all!

Andie12: Peter? 2-D? I actually felt sorry for him in the book. He just simply was a coward, not much that he could do about it… Well, Remus says Draco can't be more than 7 years old… and the incident with James happened 5 years ago, and Harry was (in the book) only one then. So yeah, around 6-7 years old at this point. (thinks) Draco is very mature, isn't he? I think they shouldn't have 'removed' NC-17 exactly, but put it in a different section of the site so you could only get into it with a password or something.

Lupin's#1fan: Aww… a lot of people couldn't review on 3, I wonder why… Cheeky!Draco… ahahahahahah! And yup, something of the sort's going to happen later. _Much_ later. Yay, I thought that gesture was cute too. Sirius really does a lot of things for Remus, doesn't he?

Emma Lupin: Oh my! I wasn't even thinking about mpreg when I answered your last review. Of course not! I don't have anything against mpregs that are done well, but I think those are too hard for me to pull off, so no. Werewolves reproduce by biting others, and two men won't be able to have children in this fic.

Shinigami: I hope this chapter cleared up some things, and if it didn't, tell me and I'll try to fix it, cuz it's supposed to explain (laughs nervously). Dumbledore couldn't _really_ do much about the situation if Remus didn't want Sirius, right?

Larka: It's Draco, and there'll be more about that later on... I think Draco's a lot more OOC in this chapter, since he really didn't appear that much in the last one. Thank youso much!

FlamencoPenguin: Well... this story is based on S/R romance, but a lot of the main plot will, (reads off title) be centered around the godfather crisis. So it's not entirely meant to be a romance story. I'm glad you like it! Thanks!

Remus Moony Lupin: There never was any serious Sirius bashing... (ooo pun!) And nah, I only change the things that wouldn't effect the plot, or about stuff I haven't decided on. You're so supportive! (heart)

Sailor Pride and Yumi-chan: (bows back) (feels flattered) (bows to Remus God) (bow...) (bow...) (bow...) ... What am I doing? (Eh...)

Next Chapter: The Rust-tarnished Snitch

Mikril-dey


	5. The Rust tarnished Snitch

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: PG-13, with some violence, language and horror factors

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)… the non-con bit was over in chapter 2.

Type: AU, romance, drama

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 5: The Rust-tarnished Snitch

"Padfoot," James said emotionlessly. "We have your house completely surrounded. Please surrender, or we'll be forced to use force."

Sirius couldn't breath. Feeling light-headed, he stared at his former friend, mouth open wide. What in the world- who… just _who_ had given his house away? Snape! But it couldn't be, Snape didn't know where he lived.

James wasn't much different, with black hair just as messy as the day they'd graduated, but his eyes had changed. They were both older and younger at once. This was the same Prongs… but at the same time, it wasn't. Sirius snapped back to himself when James pointed his wand at the locked window.

"Alohom-" In a split second, Sirius sprang into action. He didn't even realize his wand was drawn until the spell had left his mouth, spoken so fast that, for a moment, he couldn't figure out which spell he had used.

Remus barely had time to dodge as Sirius' spell sped past him like a sting of electricity. The window hissed like an angry wasp and the werewolf snatched his hand away.

"ora-" The window banged against each other violently, very nearly bursting open under Jame's magic. Remus watched in a moment of frozen, morbid fascination, as the black haired man's eyes widened, and his hand snapped back. A tiny crackle of blue bit at the offending arm, and James let out a small yelp and released his wand. The same blue light that danced around the window sizzled around him.

The wand was suspending in midair for all of half a second before he began to fall. James shot another look into the room and pulled his broom sharply upwards, falling away to retrieve his wand and join the aurors on the ground.

Sirius raced to the door and cast the same protection spell upon it. A form of elemental barrier setting that shocked anyone using magic upon it. The stronger the magic, the stronger the shock.

"Narcissa!" Sirius whirled as he heard his cousin enter the room. "Check the floo! Now!"

The blonde woman's expression was hard; perfectly formed porcelain eyes narrowed in a determination that was far too familiar. In a flash she had vanished up the stairs. Sirius turned to the door again, a hard set around his mouth.

"Padfoot…" Remus swallowed. "You can't win this. You and I both know that there are more than thirty wizards outside the house. Let me out, and I'll go talk to them. Surely you- your priority is to protect your cousin and her child, isn't it?"

Sirius ignored him as he added another dozen spells upon the door, many of which were in foreign languages that Remus had never heard of.

"Padfoot!" Remus tried again. "If you make them break into the house, it's considered resisting arrest, and that'll only worsen the sentence-"

"Moony!" Suddenly, Sirius grabbed his wrist. Instinctively, Remus twisted his hands around, trying to loosen the other's grip. "Moony," Sirius' eyes were hard. "You're losing your touch. You understand how the Ministry thinks better than I do. There's a Dementor with my name on its robes. Moony, there isn't going to _be_ a sentence. Just a kiss."

Before Remus could answer, Narcissa had burst into the room, cheeks flushed with exertion. Her eyes were dark. Draco had wandered into the living room at the commotion. There was an unreadable expression on his face, and Remus wondered briefly why the boy didn't seem surprised.

Remus' wrist was released, and he backed a few steps away. His mind was in turmoil. What should he do? Would it be appropriate to break down the door and join his friends outside? Was he supposed to help James capture the Death Eaters? But these… putting Sirius aside, Narcissa wasn't some insane, raving pureblood slaughtering muggles and wizards… and Draco was just a child. And if Sirius got the Kiss-

"I've tried everything, even my villa in France," Narcissa panted. "They've sealed off every possible escape. There's no way we can get out. Oh, and in case you care, I ripped my best dress. You're paying for it."

"They have spells against Apparition," Sirius ignored her. "And even if they didn't, it is not an option. The brat would be left behind." Draco stiffened at those words.

"I can get myself out of here anytime," he snorted. "Think of yourself first, Black."

Sirius ignored that too. "Alright, here's what we'll do. Where's the most secure room in this house?"

Narcissa bit her lips, but then seemed to remember that Malfoys didn't bite lips and stopped. "The basement, where we store some of Lucius' personals that we brought from the manor. There are no windows and there's a long hall outside the door."

Sirius made a face at 'Lucius' personals,' but nodded. "Perfect. Narcissa, take Draco and… Remus down there. I'm going to call for help." He sprinted up the stairs to the chimney in the master bedroom.

There was a single short flight of stairs leading up to the chimney in Narcissa's room. Sirius swept past the bathroom dotted with muggle white paint and into the bedroom. Narcissa had definitely taken advantage of Lucius' absence to add her own colors to decoration.

The room was entirely pink, with soft baby blue drapes hanging around a gigantic four poster bed. A cheerfully playing music box sat at the end of the table, with nymphs gaily dancing in circles as a rabbit, yes rabbit, sat drumming in the middle.

Sirius had time to mentally shake his head before he spotted the fireplace. He stalked up to it, wand clutched tightly in one hand. The room felt suffocatingly hot and his blood began to pound in his veins in time with the rabbit's drumming.

_Thump-_

_Thump-_

"Mor- Morsmordre!" He managed, shooting the apparition of the Dark Mark into the sky above their house. Subsequent apparitions followed, lighting up the entire sky above their neighborhood in a cloud of sickly green and black.

Sirius leaped back as a cry of '_Stupefy_' echoed down the chimney and the curse nearly hit him. Jumping back, Sirius swore.

_Protean_ changed the fireplace into a locked, bubbling cauldron. That'd show the ones trying to fly down after shrinking themselves.

"Well, Lupin, move it!" Narcissa grabbed Draco's collar and pushed him towards the lower stairs harshly. "I wouldn't be risking my life for a werewolf if Black wasn't going to have my head."

"Mother," Draco started, but his mother cut him off.

"Draco, what part of 'get downstairs' do you not understand?" Narcissa snapped. She stalked up to him and gave the child a shove. Draco stumbled on the first step, grabbed the railing and looked utterly humiliated. "Or do you want to go grab your toys?" She sneered.

Remus was horrified. Narcissa… Malfoy… she wasn't a bad woman, but why would she treat her own son… like an underling Death Eater?

"Mother," Draco managed. "I want to take my mirror. It is upstairs in my room."

"Do you think Dumbledore's wizards are going to wait for you to fetch a _mirror_?" She shouted. "They'd _Avada_ you on the spot- how will your performance _ever_ satisfy our Lord if you can't even obey orders-"

"That's enough!" Remus grabbed the woman's wrist, werewolf strength shooting through his limbs. There was a hard lump in his throat. He was right then, these… Death Eaters viewed their children as nothing more than future minions. Narcissa struggled once and immediately realized the vast difference in strength between them. "He's _not_ one of your underlings! He's a _child_! And you are his _mother_."

Making up his mind, Remus swept past the two Malfoys and descended the stairs. On the bottom, he looked up at the child with silver eyes, face softening. "Come on, knowing your Father, he'd have a billion mirrors in his personals."

Draco's shocked expression quickly melted into a stubborn one as he started down. "I'm blaming you if I can't find one."

Narcissa huffed, slightly offended. Mostly though, she didn't know what to make of Remus' outburst. "Well, I'll be."

The storage room stored far more than Lucius Malfoy's belongings. Everything from half a dozen mirrors, formal dress robes and books to Narcissa's pink satin curtains and Draco's broom was in that large room. Remus sat down on a makeshift chair. Narcissa groaned as she realized it was her precious curtains draped over a pile of Lucius' Dark Arts books. Then she noticed that her son sat closer to the werewolf than to her, the mother. She swallowed, decided not to speak up, and retreated into a corner to nurse her wounded ego.

Sirius joined them a moment later, a dark look in his eyes. There was a faint perspiration on his brows, and Remus noticed that his magical aura was significantly weaker. After he entered, Narcissa magically locked the door to the basement. They were barricaded.

"I sent the Dark Mark into the sky," Sirius muttered tiredly. "Damn near had some wizard's _Stupefy_ hit me through your chimney before I sealed it. Now hopefully our Lord will see it and send reinforcements. I've also sealed off the entire house."

"And if he doesn't see it?" Narcissa asked.

"We'll last until tonight," Sirius replied grimly. "They'll break through in a couple hours and with any luck I can still hold them off for a while. I hope you have food down here."

"Just snacks we serve for tea," Narcissa rummaged through the stacks.

"That's good enough, did you expect a cuisine?" Sirius made his way over to where Remus sat. "Move, Malfoy."

Remus noticed that, when he'd been concentrating on their conversation, Draco had shifted closer so that he was almost sitting beside him. He didn't know whether to pity the boy or feel touched by the innocent gesture. However, with Draco on one side and a giant sculpture of a serpent on the other, there was no place for Sirius.

Draco looked defiantly up at man. "Go sit somewhere else, Black. If Lupin wants to join you, he'll move himself."

For a moment, Sirius looked taken aback, then chuckled and sat down on the other side of the boy. Draco flinched, not quite certain about being trapped between two adults. Sirius sent him a look that clearly said 'You're welcome to move.' It was too much of a challenge, so Draco stayed where he was.

Sirius met Remus' gaze over Draco's head. "Thank you," Sirius said. "You don't know how much this means to me."

Remus looked away and said nothing. Sirius felt his heart fall again. Actually, he had no idea why Remus had stayed with them, but he had a sinking feeling that it wasn't for him.

_Think about something else,_ he told himself. It's enough that Remus was there, wasn't it?

He spotted the broom propped up in the corner and frowned. Whose broom was it? From what he remembered, Lucius Malfoy never joined in Quidditch or flying, preferring to travel by some secret that no one outside of the family knew. Narcissa? She was deadly scared of heights.

And it was a good broom too, a premium racing Moon Trimmer with a sleek silver color. Sirius froze. It couldn't be…

"Malfoy, is that your broom?" He asked.

Draco looked up, surprised. Then puffed up his chest proudly. "Yes, father got it for me when I turned seven. It's supposed to be _really_ fast."

Sirius felt rage swell up inside him. Lucius not being around, he turned on his cousin. Narcissa looked thoroughly bewildered. Remus swallowed and had to admit to himself that he hadn't noticed. The Moon Trimmer was a model that even he, a seasoned flier, would have to concentrate on handling. That Draco even _mounted_ the thing was a miracle.

"What's wrong with you?" Sirius demanded angrily. "You gave a _racing broom_ to a seven year old brat! It's a miracle he hasn't killed himself yet! Can he even lift the thing? You _don't_ give children real brooms, especially not _racing_ brooms! Has he even been on a broom before?"

Narcissa sputtered. "N-no, but Malfoys don't use _toy_ brooms-"

Sirius swirled around to face Draco, and the child gulped audibly.

"You," Sirius said, "are coming with me to Diagon Alley next time. Merlin, I can't believe you even _touched_ that thing without it trying to kill you. That's a broom even some seasoned fliers can't handle."

Draco opened and closed his mouth several times. This was overwhelming. He had never liked Black, especially since every other 'family friend' at least _pretended_ to like him and called him Draco. Black had called him Malfoy.

And the two weeks before, Black had locked himself in his own house, planning and insanely muttering to himself. Draco believed he was a madman. He blinked rapidly to clear the heat behind his eyes.

"… Comet series maybe, they're tame and not bad brooms altogether…" Sirius was still muttering.

"Stop," Draco said, unnaturally quiet. His throat felt tight. What was he doing? _Shut up, Draco, shut up!_ he told himself. He horrified himself as he said, "Black, you should hate me."

The man stopped. "Why?"

"Because," Draco stopped for a moment to gather his breath. _Stop! Oh Merlin, what am I doing?_ "Because I told them. I told them about this place."

* * *

Flashback: Two weeks ago, before the mating, the night after Malfoy and Black's meeting with Voldemort

"No."

"What do you mean, Draco Malfoy?" Narcissa demanded. "Of course _yes_! This is a good learning opportunity. Sirius Black is a perfectly capable wizard, if slightly eccentric- marry a werewolf indeed- you can learn from him." Not that the woman _truly_ cared, Draco would bet.

"We are safer at the manor, Mother," he didn't back down. "Black lives in a _mudblood_ community. That doesn't bother you at all?"

"M-mudblood community?" the woman looked faint for a moment, then her eyes hardened. "I want you packed in an hour, we'll floo to the new house and I'll disconnect the Manor's fireplace for now. I'll inspect the new house in the morning."

"Mother, Black _hates_ me," Draco said angrily. "I won't go! I _like_ it at the manor, I don't want to move!"

"I don't care what kind of problems you have with this," Narcissa said shortly. "If I say we move, we're moving."

Draco was still in the same spot as she stormed out, muttering under her breath, "Merlin, I need to bring a house elf. I can't do the chores…" Furiously, he kicked his floating broom model at the door as it closed behind Narcissa. The toy clattered a few feet before laying on the ground. Draco watched as it lazily picked itself back up to hover about three inches from the ground.

Draco ground his teeth together tightly, hands clenched in fists. Black was only part of the reason he didn't want to move. At least the manor was big enough for a child staying home alone, barely exchanging a word with another soul in months. In different winding stairs, mysterious hidden rooms and dusty dungeons, Draco could pretend that someone was with him; that there were two kids instead of one exploring castles, fighting off dragons and rescuing each other.

Still fuming, he began to pack, but not because of Narcissa, Merlin _no._

Before the hour was up Draco was gone. He wasn't an idiot, and he knew he couldn't stay away indefinitely, but surely staying away for a couple nights would be no problem.

Pulling the blanket so it covered the entire large mirror he had brought from home, Draco trudged down the familiar forest paths. At the edge of the Malfoy estate, he pushed through several thickly grown thickets and settled.

Angry as he still was, Draco had problems falling asleep, so he'd propped the mirror against a large trunk, and stared at his own reflection. How long till he could Mirror Walk like his Father?

The horizon began to dim. A slight apprehension washed over him. He was used to the darkness… but this was different. Swallowing hard, Draco tucked his blankets around himself and closed his eyes tightly. At least if he closed his eyes, he wouldn't have to see anything.

Draco was almost asleep when he heard it through the darkness. Voices just outside his ring of trees. Male voices, at least two of them. Suddenly frightened, Draco pushed away his blankets and stood. Breathing hard to stop his pounding heart, he clenched his teeth tightly together and listened.

"So Malfoy's gone?" He heard a voice ask and a chill swept down him. They were talking about his father! At that moment, he was sure that they would hear his beating heart.

"Left this morning, won't be back for months. Don't worry. The idiot bastard won't even know we'd been here. The fool probably wouldn't even care. Heh, who ever heard of a Malfoy that cared about family?"

Draco felt all the blood rush to his head. How _dared_ they talk about his father that way! His father was a great man! Everyone said so! And he _did_ care about Draco, or he wouldn't have bought the beautiful broom, right?

"Think he'll even notice if his wife and brat are dead?" One chuckled. Draco stopped himself from leaping out and defending his father and family just in time.

"Nah, probably just wonder why the meal was late and wonder where his whore went. He won't notice until a year before the brat has to go to school and he thinks, 'oh, better teach him how to be a proper Malfoy' or something."

That was _it_! Draco couldn't take anymore. Nobody insulted his family like that! He leaped out, silver eyes blazing.

"You bloody cowards!" Draco cried. "Don't dare talk about my father in front of his face, do you?"

Later, Draco would label that as one of the worse decisions of his life as he pressed both bloodied hands to the mirror surface desperately trying to Mirror Walk as the sounds of his pursuers trying to breach the clearing reached his ears.

* * *

Flashback: At the Hideout

"Help… help me…"

Harry jerked awake. Shivering, he threw aside his covers and sat up. Had he just heard a voice? It was unnaturally cold in his room, as if all the warmth had drained out. Harry had the sudden urge to run to his parent's room, climbing in between them. But he was almost seven years old. Far too old to run to Mom and Dad like a baby.

"Bloody hell… can anyone hear me?"

Harry froze. He definitely heard a voice, and it had sounded desperate. For a moment, he considered diving under his blankets again and huddling there till morning… but then… maybe it wasn't something scary… Trembling, Harry climbed out of bed, both feet sinking into the warm carpet beneath him.

"Who's there?" He whispered, blinking hard through the darkness in the direction he had heard the cry. Harry's fear worsened as he realized it had came from his table. "What do you want?"

"Help! This is ridiculous! Isn't there anyone out there?" The voice rang out more clearly this time. There was a hint of panic in it. Despite his better judgment, Harry approached his table, eyes fixed on the mirror that hung over it. As he leaned in close, his breath caught as a faint mist fogged over the mirror surface.

A face appeared in the murky mirror that was not his own reflection. Harry screamed and would've backed away had a hand not shot out and grabbed his pajama collar.

It was a hand as small as his own, but Harry was still dragged over the table and his face pressed against the glass as the hand slipped into the mirror again. His ink bottle rolled to one side, tracing a line of black across his desk. Quills fluttered away. Terrified, Harry shoved hard against the mirror, trying to push himself away.

"No! What are- what do you want?" Harry cried out as the pale hand was pulled from the mirror, still attached to his collar. "Mom! Dad! Let go-" His voice sped towards the mirror, as the gleaming surface greedily devoured his words.

"Just get me out of this thing!" The boy gritted his teeth… boy? Yes it was a boy. His gray eyes, now visible in the mirror surface, were wide with fright. "Ow!"

Harry grabbed the arm protruding from his mirror and pulled hard. Straining, the boy's head and other arm was free from the mirror, and he grabbed the wooden frame and pulled himself out. Falling off the table, Harry laid still for a moment, panting, stars jumping around him. His hand fisted tightly in the carpet as he fought to regain his breath. Harry's heart was pounding like mad.

The boy was sprawled across his table, now entirely free from the glass. The mirror gazed innocently back at them as Harry and the new boy stared at it.

That was when Harry noticed the other boy's condition. Blood had soaked through the black sweater and pants, now dying his pictures of Color-changing ink a brilliant red. For a moment, Harry could only stand, stunned, as in his stick figure drawing, his father's robes winked from blue to green to golden… to a blood red.

The boy swore as he gingerly lifted himself off his stomach and rolled onto his back. When he collapsed lengthwise on Harry's table, the first whimper of pain escaped through his clenched teeth.

Harry had never seen anyone injured so badly. The worse had been when Remus tripped over his toys, which he had forgotten to put away, and reopened a wound on his leg after a particularly bad full moon. Remus hadn't gotten mad, but after Harry helped him bandage up, he swore he would never leave toys lying around again.

"How… bad is it?" He asked. His initial panic had subsided, and Harry reached for his toy wand, trying to remember the spell Lily had taught him to clean up his spills.

"How should I know?" The boy snapped. He closed his eyes with a groan. "Everything hurts."

"I'll get help. My parents are just downstairs."

"No! Don't you dare!" The boy said, alarmed. "Just shut up for a moment."

"_Scourgify_," Harry whispered. The toy wand was good for that, at least. As the smudges of dirt came off, Harry saw that the boy was probably not much older than he was.

The boy proceeded to ignore him, gasping sharply as he tried to sit up. Harry, feeling bewildered, made a move to help but backed away as he was scowled at. Everything seemed eerily dream-like: the dark house, pulling an injured boy out of a mirror, the blood, his harsh voice and cold eyes. None of them seemed real.

"Stop the blood," Harry said with difficulty. "That's what Remus always says. Um… so we tie it with something." He looked around his room and saw the beaded drapes that he wove for Lily's birthday in a month. No, Remus' blood was always stopped by soft cloth when magic didn't work.

Hesitantly, he picked a random shirt from his messy closet and held it out. The blond boy looked at him through narrowed eyes before snatching the shirt with a mumbled word that may have been 'thanks' if Harry was optimistic.

Watching the boy struggle as he tried to tie the shirt around his left thigh through the dark pants that were quickly wet with blood again. "You don't have to do it on your own," Harry burst out, climbing on the table as well. "I'll tie it."

Perhaps Draco was too weak with blood lost to protest, but he allowed Harry to take the shirt from him, and gingerly tied it around the wound. Neither boy realized that, tied so loosely, the shirt did absolutely nothing except soak up the blood.

But now slightly more assured, Draco relaxed. He even fancied that his leg didn't hurt so much anymore. The seconds ticked by them as Draco's wound magically began to heal like wizard injuries often do.

"So…" Harry said, suddenly at a lost for words. "Um… I'm Harry, so who are you?"

"That really has nothing to do with you," Draco snorted. He paused. "Harry what? Are you a pureblood?"

"Potter… I'm Harry Potter." Harry thought for a moment. "My parents are a witch and a wizard if that's what you mean."

Draco nodded, feeling slightly better. He was already humiliated that his rescuer had been a boy his own age, but if he had been rescued by some _mudblood_, he didn't think he'd ever be able to live with himself.

Then it struck him. A boy his own age! And obviously not one of the pureblood circle that Draco was used to. He didn't know Draco: didn't know he was a Malfoy and didn't know to be fearful of Lucius. This one wouldn't treat him like a prince.

Draco wasn't sure how to feel about that. Of course he needed to reestablish his superiority… but it just felt different. With this boy, Harry Potter, he could start to imagine an equal friendship.

His father was going to kill him for this.

* * *

"Aw, damned," Sirius groaned. "I guess I can't pin this one on Snape then, pity." Remus blinked, startled, as he realized his hand was somehow enclosed in Sirius'. Draco had moved sometime during his explanation, now sitting stiffly next to the largest mirror in the storage room. An uneasy hand was pressed to the polished surface, as if the boy expected the need to flee for his life.

Narcissa looked furious. "Idiot!" She snarled. "What in Salazar's name were you _thinking_?" How could you- Oh Merlin. And the Potter boy is _not_ a pureblood! Haven't you heard your Father talk about the Potters enough? How could you _not know_?"

Stalking up to the boy, Narcissa was brought to an abrupt stop as Remus cut her off half way. "Narcissa," he said reasonably. "You can't punish a child for confiding in a friend. If anything is blameless, that is."

"Friend?" Draco echoed tightly, eyes still fixed on Sirius. "He's not a friend! Just someone I know."

Sirius followed his gaze. "Brat," he snorted. "I'm furious at you, but I'll save the hexes until you're eighteen. Never let it be said that I pick on children. So you can take your hands off the mirror."

Draco's pale cheeks flushed with embarrassment that his escape plan had been seen through. Silver eyes flashed with anger as he removed his hand from the mirror. "By then you'd be so old that you'd forget all your hexes. I'll slaughter you in a duel, just you watch."

"Old," Sirius echoed, offended. "I'll be thirty-six, brat, thank you very much. You Malfoys are the ones with prematurely white hair. I'll bet _you'd_ look forty by the time you're-"

A large crack sounded above them. In an instant, all three adults had shot into a standing position. Tension crackled in the room. Sirius' hand shot to his wand and Narcissa's lovely face was contorted in a disbelieving expression.

"Impossible!" Narcissa gasped. "They couldn't have- how?"

"Bugger," Sirius gritted his teeth. "Narcissa, lend me a hand."

"This is going to ruin my dress again, isn't it?" the woman wailed, wringing her hands dramatically before joining Sirius at the door. Draco looked utterly confused.

"What's going on?" He asked. His expression clearly indicated that he didn't expect an answer from any of the adults.

"They got in," Remus replied with mixed emotions. "I don't understand how. Knowing Sirius, the wards he set ought to have been perfect. I've tried getting past his barriers before this, but it took me _hours_. I was the fastest too. Who- do they have outside?"

Crack!

And the answer to Remus' question appeared in the room. All four gazes landed on the short creature, who puffed himself up with a malicious grin, ears twitching in excitement. Dread touched the pit of Sirius' heart.

They had forgotten the house elf.

"Kreacher," He snarled. "What have you done?"

The house elf cackled. "Oh how _dreadfully_ sinful of me, taking down your wards from the inside," Kreacher snickered. "Repent now! Repent and perhaps you they will spare you from certain _death_! They're coming, you know? The Lord's justice-"

"Go stuff yourself, you worthless worm," Sirius snapped. "It's just bad karma, thinking if I gave you to Malfoy, you'd make _him_ miserable instead."

Narcissa gasped. "So _that's_ why you gave him to us! I was wondering why you were so charitable. That's utterly horrible, Black! This house elf- he's a bloody traitor!"

"Blasphemy," Kreacher hissed. "repent now, you sinners! Or you shall all be killed and burned in Hell's holy _fire_! The holy wizards are coming! The Lord's justice shall be served! Worshipers of false deities!"

"Sirius," Remus interrupted. "Don't tell me you've imprinted him with the _bible_."

"Shut up, it was funny at the time," Sirius groaned. "Hearing him preach instead of insult. Definitely worth the sacrifice of a bible." In Imprintext was developed by the Marauders in fifth year quite by accident. Sirius, ever the pyromaniac, had set his textbooks on fire and Peter, who had inhaled the fumes, ended up talking nonstop about arithmetic nonsense for three days. Then they had a potion brewed over the fire of a burning book, and fed the potion to both Lucius Malfoy and Snape.

Remus had originally objected, but found that he couldn't hold his end of the argument when the victimized book was a trashy, mushy romance novel. He had laughed as loud as Sirius when Lucius, known for breaking hearts, and Severus, renown celibate, both went on bent knees and asked Hufflepuff girls to marry them. In the middle of breakfast.

A large explosion sounded above them followed by several cries. Sirius grimaced. The commotion had brought home to them just how close the aurors were. "Foolish wizards, falling for such an obvious mine trap. What do they take me for?"

"And you can just get out," Sirius snapped, grabbing Kreacher by the scruff of his ragged pillow case and bodily throwing him outside the door. He caught a single glimpse of dark cloaked aurors before he slammed the door. "Damned house elves," he muttered under his breath.

"Sirius Black!" A magically enhanced voice rang down through the spell laden corridor. Sirius couldn't place the voice. But then, the voices sounded slightly different after enhancement anyways.

"Surrender, and we'll spare your lives!" The voice urged. "Release the hostage. Come out with your wand in your mouth, hands on your head."

"Fat chance," Sirius growled, fingers cold on his wand. Where were the reinforcements? "Narcissa, we have a consensus on this, right? We're going to hold this out until the end."

"Fine, whatever," Narcissa replied angrily, "but I'm telling you, Black, this would never have happened if Lucius was here!" Sirius rolled his eyes.

They barely noticed as Remus stepped away from Draco, a glazed look in his eyes.

_What should I do,_ Remus thought. The choice had been easy before. It was simple to tell himself that had he tried to rush outside; he wouldn't have been able to make three steps before Sirius stopped him.

But now the other wizard was distracted. His allies were just beyond the door. Remus stared at the white entrance in dismay. That door… going through it would mean being miserable for the rest of his life. Staying… would be unthinkable.

He wasn't stupid. He knew that Sirius wouldn't be caught here, not with that manic, confident gleam in his eyes, and he knew the exact consequences of this decision. If Remus rejoined James and the other Aurors, he would probably never see Sirius again. The guards during full moon would triple, his missions would place him far from the invasions of Voldemort's third in command. He would constantly be sent from the country, off in diplomatic talks elsewhere. And he would live out his life in loneliness, and even more misery than the last seven years. The werewolf bond would never let him forget what he was missing.

On the other hand, if Remus stayed, his awkward relationship with Sirius would continue. The most likely thing to happen would be a regular cycle of violence. Sirius would lose his temper, then try to make up. Remus would try to accept, then feel so guilty about it that he gives up, which would trigger another burst of rage on Sirius part. And the cycle would begin again.

He pressed a hand tightly against his nose and mouth. Which was better? A lifetime of regret or a life of loneliness?

In that moment, as he watched Sirius set up the barriers around the door, everything else disappeared. Narcissa, Draco, the room, and the noises of ever encroaching Aurors outside vanished.

Remus couldn't lie. Even now, part of him was contemplating staying. Before James showed up, all he'd thought about was escape. But now that he was given a choice, the right thing to do just seemed so hard…

And leaving was the right choice: the most moral, honest, loyal choice. And Remus always did what was right, didn't he?

So why was it so hard? Why couldn't he will his legs to move? The door seemed… so far away…

Remus fixed his eyes on Sirius' concentrated face, with brows slightly wrinkled and impossibly clear gray eyes narrowed. Long black hair riding low on his back, Sirius looked incredible. If possible, even more handsome in mid-twenties than in his teens. Swallowing hard, Remus memorized every detail of Sirius' face. His eyes felt hot. This was for real. If he left now, there will be no more midnight visits during full moon…

He was never going to see Sirius again. Those arms he had felt so safe within would be gone forever.

Slowly, he took a step forward, then another. _This is the right thing to do_, Remus screamed to himself. _You can't betray Dumbledore, or James, or Lily! They've done too much for you._ When he, too, was beside the door, he willed his tongue to move.

"Padfoot," he said softly. Startled, the black haired werewolf looked up from his wand. For a moment their eyes held each other. Remus felt as if he was back in school, with Sirius as both a friend and a lover, and nothing loomed between them.

"Moony…"

Remus tried to smile, but it felt twisted and wrong. Too broad and didn't touch the muscles beneath his eyes. His tongue tasted sour. The moment he eased off the muscle in his face, his mouth dropped back into a grimace.

"Padfoot, I…" he swallowed as Sirius leaned in closer, their breaths mingling together. Sirius was close, too close. One hand reached out and settled on Remus' shoulder, brushing back slightly longer strands of tawny hair. Scrunching his eyes, Remus grabbed Sirius' hand and brought it up to his cheek, blinking away tears. "I've always loved you, Padfoot."

His voice was so soft that Sirius didn't hear what he said at first. Those gentle, haunting golden eyes seemed to envelop him.

"Even now." Remus was smiling, and it was the most beautiful, breathtaking smile Sirius had ever remembered. He'd forgotten how bright Remus' happiness had been. Sirius wanted nothing more than to stand there forever, his thoughts locked within the smile he loved so much.

"I love you too, Moony," he said hoarsely. "So much… it hurts sometimes." But it was worth it. All the loneliness, longing. It was worth it. Sirius would instantly trade seven years of his life for one of Remus' smiles.

"Yeah," Remus' eyes and nose were red. "That's why… I'm sorry Padfoot… Goodbye." Before he could lose his nerve, Remus backed jerkily away and crashed through the door, stumbling blindly on the bottom frame of the door.

"Wha-" Sirius blinked, not understanding what was going on. Why had Remus just… walked away?

Then the enormity of it hit him.

"M-Moony!" He roared. He twisted the door knob, fully intending to head out after his mate. "Moony you git!"

Narcissa jumped on him, hands desperately clutching at Sirius' arm to restrain him. "Black no! You'll be killed if you went out! Stop it! Get a hold on yourself! You're acting like a madman! Black!"

"No! Moony! You can't do this to me!" Sirius bellowed, clawing in a frenzy towards the door. Narcissa thanked all her lucky stars that her cousin forgot about his werewolf strength. Otherwise, she would be no match for him. Fortunately, she was a strong woman despite her looks. She winced as her fingernails dug into Sirius' arm.

"Black!" She snapped. "If you make me break a nail, I swear I'll hex you so hard you'd be at St. Mungos growing back every bone in your body! I swear it!"

"Come back!" Sirius cried. "Moony! I hate you! Moony!" He broke loose. Narcissa stifled a gasp but the man only sank to his knees in front of the door. "Come back… why… Moony… oh Merlin… where…"

"Black?" Narcissa tried timidly. "You going to be alright?"

Sirius' only reply was to slam his head against the door and ended his mutters. His long curtain of black hair blocked his face, but Narcissa had a strong suspicion that Sirius Black was crying. Draco shakily climbed to his feet. "Mother…" he asked, trembling. "Why did Lupin leave? If… if someone liked me that much, I'd never leave. Never."

"That's why you're not ready, Draco," Narcissa said, equally shaken. "The day you can fight a war is the day when you can honestly say 'I'll leave' to someone you love. Parent, lover… or child."

* * *

Remus pushed blindly past the Aurors, all of whom stared at him in confusion and awe. But he couldn't handle their questions right now. He just needed to be alone. He just needed to curl up in an abandoned corner and die. This was worse than going through a thousand full moons. A million.

As much as he'd told himself not to look back, he had caught a glimpse of Sirius' stricken face. And it broke his heart.

Someone grabbed his arm, and Remus instinctively lashed out, flinging the offender back into two other wizards.

"Get away from me!" He sobbed. "Nobody's going to touch me right now. Nobody, you hear me? Get out of my way!"

"Not even your best friend, Moony?" The wizard asked. Remus forced himself to blink through his tears, but he couldn't. Every time he cleared the liquid before his eyes, more would take its place. Everything was blurry.

"Prongs…" He trembled. "Merlin, Prongs!"

Relieved, Remus threw himself at James, crushing his friend in a tight embrace. James awkwardly petted his shoulder. "There, there," he felt stupid for saying it. "What in the world happened, Moony? Was it Padfoot? Did he do something?"

Remus shook his head, unable to make a sound. "I left him."

"What?"

"I left him," Remus choked. "It was the right thing to do, but it was so hard… I love him, Prongs. They- don't they- say love dims with time, well guess what, mine didn't! He kept harping on… seven years. I never knew… it hurts, Prongs."

"It's going to be fine," James swallowed. "Let's just get you back to the headquarters, alright? You don't look hurt, so how about we go out for hot chocolate with Lily and Harry afterwards?"

Remus shook his head forcefully. James frowned. He had assumed that Remus would have some qualms about leaving his former lover, but perhaps it was harder than he thought? He seemed so unstable right now, was it better to treat him as a friend or a victim?

"I just-" Remus choked. "I can't believe… I left. It was… so hard. The hardest thing I'd ever done. But I had to! There was no other choice!" As he realized his own hysterical voice, Remus calmed down a little. "Sorry. Sorry, you shouldn't have to hear that. I shouldn't have lost control. Should've known better."

"Moony," James was at a lost for words. A particularly nasty one of Sirius' curses sent a golden spark tunneling through the corridor and up the stairs. Three wizards jumped to one side to avoid it. James' face hardened. "Moony, listen. I know I'm an insensitive prat, but as your friend, I have to know. Are you… mated?"

Remus nodded mutely. James felt his breath catch. "Moony! You-" He swallowed. "I thought you said Sirius is a dominant."

"He is…"

"Then how did you mate with him?"

"He- it was forced," Remus pulled himself away and angrily dried his eyes, biting his lips hard to keep them from trembling.

"Why that bast-" James started, staring at him in open horror. His eyes were wide behind his glasses, and all the color had left his face. "He forced the mating. Are you bloody serious, he forced the-"

"Shut up!" Remus swallowed as a new burst of tears welled up, swaying dangerously. Damned, why can't he stop crying? "I- I don't need your pity James." His knees chose that moment to buckle, and he staggered forward to rest against the wall. He shut his eyes tightly and murmured. "I just want… to be alone… for a moment, 'kay? Just a moment."

James could only watch as Remus sank slowly into a sitting position before drawing up his legs and burying his face in his arms. Ignoring the other wizards as they set about trying to break into the basement door, James sat beside his friend and leaned his head back against the wall.

"Prongs?" Remus asked quietly.

"Yeah?"

"It was the right thing to do, wasn't it?" Remus whispered. Eyes trained pleadingly on his friend. "Tell me I did the right thing."

James thought, then, face sincere, said, "No, I don't think you made the right choice."

For a moment, Remus' face was blank. His eyes filled with something akin to betrayal, as if he couldn't believe James could condemn him for doing something that hurt so much.

"It- you've got your priorities mixed up, Moony." James tried to explain. "It's as if you care more about the war itself than what you're fighting it for."

Remus said nothing.

"I'm a selfish person Moony," James swallowed. "I'm not Dumbledore's right hand man because I'm outraged at what Voldemort is doing. I just want to protect the things that I love."

At Remus' disbelieving gaze, James shook his head. "I love the Wizarding World, Moony, just like I love Lily, Harry, you and a billion other people. I'm not big enough to save the world, so I'm just going to concentrate on saving the people closest to me. If I give that up, I might as well not fight at all."

Remus felt his eyes grow hot again. "I don't even know what I'm giving up. If it's going to be taken away regardless of what I do, I might as well give up when there is still a chance."

James managed a half smile. "Why fight at all if you're not going to fight for your right to be happy?" He swung an arm around the tawny haired werewolf.

* * *

An hour fled by as the Aurors hacked away at the protective wards outside. Noon had come and gone as the mother and child ate and Sirius muttered to himself. Narcissa had nearly given up on Sirius when he abruptly straightened himself, calm once more.

"Those look good, let me try some."

"Is it safe to approach you?" Narcissa asked. "You won't transform and bite our heads off?" Sirius' jaws tightened. Draco, unable to tell if his mother was joking, felt his legs tense up.

"I don't know why I was so upset," Sirius said harshly. "I knew it was going to happen. At the first sign of a rescue, Moony was going to leave. I knew that, but it was just-" He shook his head. "I should be used to it by now. I've been rejected so many times I've lost count."

They were eating quietly when the miracle happened. Draco noticed it first, quietly watching the small lizard as it scuttled down the wall of the basement. The lizard lifted its head. Beady, almost metallic, eyes blinked at the boy.

The metal-eyed lizard vanished behind a stockpile of thickly printed books before flicking its tongue from beside it. As if satisfied that there was no danger, the lizard worked its way towards the center of the room.

By now, both Sirius and Narcissa had noticed the creature, and were watching with hardly repressed hope.

And the lizard did not disappoint. Before their eyes, it elongated, stretching into a thin man with an emaciated look about him. He was dressed in the usual black robes of Death Eaters and had a vague, glassy look in his eyes. Nervously, he pulled his silk gloves tightly over his fingers and clicked his tongue once.

"I _really_ wasn't expecting you to need rescue," the man whined.

Sirius let out a half hearted growl. "I'm in a _really_ bad mood. Just get us out of here."

"Of course, right away! Er… how?" The man looked confused.

"Black, who is this incompetent wretch?" Narcissa sneered. "Surely this isn't the _reinforcement_ you're looking for."

"Actually, it is," Sirius sighed wearily. "Pyrites is a draconian, one of the new recruits. Don't ask what his last name is, he'll claim it's Slytherin, but it really isn't. Also, he is going to get us out of here."

"I- I am?"

"Yes, now go out and tell your group to make a port key ready. Then you are going to stage some sort of distraction at exactly one o'clock." Sirius gave Draco a pointed look and gestured beside the boy. "Get me the clock."

Draco scowled, but reached beside him for the small white clock before tossing it at Sirius. "I only did it because being lazy will make you fat, Black," he retorted.

"You see this," Sirius showed the man. "It is the same as your time, is it not?" The lizard man, Pyrites, nodded. "Good, at one o'clock, distract some of the Aurors. About a minute of confusion is all I'll need. Get the port key ready. I'll fly out. We need to get these two," Sirius gestured, "back to the hideout immediately. Understood?"

"Yes, alright, distraction at one, and port key. Not too hard." With that, the tiny lizard was back, and scuttled into the dark corner of the base.

"How did he get in?" Narcissa wondered. "I thought they had wards."

"No normal animagus would've been able to," Sirius set the clock down carefully. "But it would be relatively simple for a draconian."

"What are they?" Draco burst out with the question he had since the lizard first appeared. "As a human, he was a wimp, but his lizard form was cool. It had eyes that looked like metal."

Despite himself, Sirius clapped once. "Good observation, Malfoy. Draconians are basically animagus wizards. However, the whole group of them, about thirteen families I think, have dragon forms. Now, you know it is impossible to actually transform into a magical creature, quite a shame, so they are the next closest thing. They have about two or three forms, snakes, lizards, toads, sea snakes and stuff. In those forms, they can exhibit a significant amount of magical creature abilities. They are also all Parselmouths and good at handling dragons."

Seeing Draco's slightly envious expression, Sirius sighed. "But as wizards, they are very weak. Draconians usually spend most of their time as animals."

He stalked over to the Moon Trimmer and held his hand over it. "Up!" He barked. Draco tried to utter a protest at the use of his broom, but forgot what he was going to say as the broom leaped obediently into Sirius' hand.

Sirius snatched it from the air and Draco winced as the tail twigs brushed against the wall. The black haired werewolf inspected the broom critically. A slow, dry smile pulled his lips upwards.

"You took _really_ good care of this, didn't you?" He asked.

Draco huffed, but nodded. "A broom like that should be treated with respect. And what's it to you anyway?"

"Well, lesson one is that racing brooms don't like to be babied," Sirius swung his leg gracefully over the broom and kicked off to hover barely a foot off the ground. "If you treat them like precious china dolls, they'll buck you off, simple as that."

Draco wasn't sure what to say to that, but he managed a passable glare. Sirius grinned and his gaze shifted to his mother, who had gone wide eyed and pale.

"Narcissa?" Sirius asked.

"I'm, I'm not getting on that thing," she trembled. "No way. This is some devious plot to kill me. I swear, I'd rather get caught than go on the thing." Sirius hovered closer. "Ahhh! Get it away from me! Stay away from me!"

Sirius felt another headache coming on.

* * *

"What's all the commotion?" James demanded. He had sat with Remus for nearly an hour, finally retrieving all the events of the past two days. The way down to the basement was broken into two flights of stairs with a tight corner between them. His friend had cheered up somewhat, and was ready to port key back to headquarters when screams erupted outside the house.

"Potter!" Shacklebolt screamed. "Dragons! There are dragons attacking outside!" James scowled. Kinsley Shacklebolt wasn't his favorite person in the world. The man had bragged of being able to capture Sirius in four weeks when they'd first found out that he became a Death Eater. That was seven years ago.

"What kind? And who's behind it?" His face was deadly calm, and there was a forceful gleam in his brown eyes.

"I don't know! It's not like I'm a dragon expert," Shacklebolt shouted hysterically. "Merlin, but I think they're draconians. Go help, you bastard! Why are you just sitting there? There're a dozen dragons outside!" The twenty-odd wizards that had been working away at the barriers moments before had all ran, joining the battle outside.

James' eyes narrowed and Remus started to get up. A look passed between them before James shot into action.

"_Accio_!" James pointed at the opposing wall. His broom snapped into his hand just as the door to the basement crashed open and a blur whisked past them. Within the next split second, the broom banked the impossible curve of the stair cases and tore towards the door. James was after the racing figure in a flash.

Remus' eyes widened before he ran towards the door. Shacklebolt grabbed his wrist and yanked hard. "What- what in the world was that?"

"That," Remus said, blood pounding with something akin to fear, "was a diversion. An _elementary_ diversion, and we fell for it." He shook off the offending hand and ran for the door. As he stepped into the open entrance, a scene of chaos met his eyes.

There were no dead wizards, yet. There were four dragons, all Hebridean Blacks. Thirty feet behemoths that loomed high above them, like a satanic church entirely black. Long ridges down their backs designed to intimidate and protect rather than impale people, but the aurors were scared nonetheless.

A shrill scream pieced the air and Remus looked up to see two brooms performing a deadly game of tag between the dragons. His breath caught in his throat as Sirius, with two hitchhikers clinging to his robes, brush past one dragon's nostrils. A split second later, the dragon snarled with a lungful of fire, which narrowly missed James as he wove across the dragon, barely half a broom's length away.

How in the world was Sirius staying ahead?

Remus' hands tightened in his robes. James had always been the better flier, and now, not only did James have the better broom, Sirius was also weighed down with two others. There should be no way Sirius could be ahead. In fact, Remus didn't recall seeing Sirius fly that fast in his life. Both were blurs against the sky, as even Remus' werewolf eyes couldn't make out the details.

His attention snapped back when another scream, much closer, sounded beside him. The dragons were irritated now, blowing fire this way and that. Nothing hindered them.

"Blind them!" Remus shouted. Wizard and witch heads turned in his direction. "Have you forgotten everything Auror school taught? Blind them!" Spells shot and missed as one dragon crashed into the house, sending its foundation tilting dangerously sideways.

The dragon's glittering golden eyes fell upon the wizards on the ground. Smoke flared from its nostrils. Its pupils dilated. Remus had no idea when the other man came up beside him, but Shacklebolt's nails dug into his skin as the dragon lunged towards them.

"_Avis_!" Remus shouted, Sirius' overly large cloak fluttered around him. A flock of small birds ripped out of the billowing cloak and shot towards the dragon. The huge creature blinked, momentarily distracted as the wall of screeching birds shot towards him.

The dragon recoiled sharply as the birds rammed into him, exploding into showers of white feathers and dissolving away as Remus eased off on his magic. At that moment, someone blinded the dragon and it was effectively disabled by two other Aurors.

Remus breathed a quick sigh of relief and turned back to scan the area for Sirius and James on their broomsticks. Merlin, he wished he had his wand.

* * *

"Malfoy!" Sirius shouted to be heard over the roar of the wind. Beads of sweat lined his brows. He had never gone this fast before.

"Wha-" The second part of Draco's reply was cut off as the boy let out a strangled gasp. They had banked so abruptly that they were momentarily upside down.

"Jump off."

Draco's voice rose an entire octave. "_What!_"

"Jump off when I tell you," Sirius snarled. His eyes were narrowed against the wind stinging his eyelids. Merlin, was _this_ what James went through as a Seeker? "I'll take you close to the ground. Pull your lump of a mother off too!"

Narcissa once again tried to scream through her son's hands, which had wrapped around her mouth after she had first started screaming. Her arms were so tight around Sirius' wrist that he thought she would break something. He streaked towards Pyrites, who was waving at them in the distance with a group of other draconians, looking quite proud of their 'distraction.'

James was still on his tail. Sirius' heart was pounding in his throat. Dear god, if he slowed down now, he was going to lose control of the broom. James was going to crash into him, and they were all going to die.

A single branch on the Moon Trimmer snapped, flinging behind him. Then another. The broom was reaching its limits. Sirius glanced over his shoulder and gasped. One of the twigs had broken off and hit James. He was now clutching his left arm, where the broom twig had cut into his robes, slowing.

That moment was all he needed. He pulled the Moon Trimmer sharply downwards, spiraling harshly towards the ground as he slowed.

"_No!_ I'm not jum-" Draco protested, sensing the change in Sirius' posture.

"_NOW!_" Sirius screamed.

Draco let go, unwrapping his legs from the broomstick and pulling Narcissa with him. The momentum carried them forward and both rolled several times before coming to a stop. Narcissa let loose one last piercing scream, rolled over and began to groan. She would probably have thrown up if Malfoys were ones to throw up. Instead, she coughed dryly, a whimpering voice inside her telling her that she was never, _never_ staying in the same room as broom again.

The boy groaned as he tried climbing to his feet, but his limbs were still trembling at the flight. And what an amazing flight it was. He had been going faster than he ever dreamed. Part of him swore that he was too traumatized to try flying again, but another was already beginning to live through the experience again, coveting.

"Here, Mr. Malfoy," one of the draconians handed him a dragon hide boot. "The port key to the hide out."

Draco reached out to take it, but then hesitated. "Isn't Black coming?"

"I don't know what he's thinking," the blond man Draco knew as Pyrites muttered. "He's gone back." And sure enough, Sirius was weaving through the dragons again, and this time, there was no doubt where he was headed.

* * *

Both Sirius and James had slowed considerably. There was no more desperation on Sirius' part to reach the port key anymore. He was exhausted, having stayed up the previous night, thinking of all things. James was injured.

As James shot towards him and he feinted left, Sirius was struck with the irony of the situation. On the sudden spur of the moment, he shouted back towards James. "Reminds you of Quidditch, doesn't it?"

James looked shocked for a moment, and then his cold battle face melted away. He grinned as he dodged an incredibly Bludger-like dragon claw. "Sure, Padfoot."

"Except this time, I'm Seeker and you're Keeper," Sirius yell, flipping backwards through the air. "Fancy a game, Prongs, or are you chicken?"

"Different Snitch?" James' eyes narrowed as the second dragon was pacified.

"Of course different Snitch." With that said, Sirius shot off in Remus' direction.

"You're nuts, Padfoot!" James shouted, streaking after his former friend.

"What the-" Remus looked up as the two shapes came hurdling towards him. He stepped back twice as Sirius' form grew impossibly large before him. Instinctively, he shut his eyes, expecting a collision.

_Wham!_

James' broom entangled itself with Sirius' as he crashed into the Death Eater from the side. That ruined Jame's superior broom as well, as several branches caught around the Moon Trimmer's handle before breaking off. The impact sent both brooms whirling away, both riders desperately trying to regain control. Sirius drew the handle close to his chest, rolling several times in midair before coming to a stop.

_How-_ he though numbly, frenzied breath escaping his lungs in pants. _How did I do that?_ _How did I get into a crash with _Prongs_ and come out in control of my broom?_ He was a good flier, but not _that_ good. Sirius shifted his gaze back to Remus. _It's the werewolf,_ he realized. _This is the power of a werewolf!_ Increased strength, eyesight, reflexes. Of course he'd be better at flying as well!

His hand reached over to press against his thigh, where the branches of James' broom had scraped him. There was another small cut along his shoulder, but they were minor injuries.

James drifted down, also gasping for breath. For a moment, he and Sirius locked their eyes, floating above the battle. Wizards below them were too preoccupied with the dragons to notice them. "Why?" James asked. "I don't understand you, Padfoot."

Sirius urged his broom closer. They were within reaching distance now. If James pulled out his wand at that moment, he could probably have hexed Sirius before the Death Eater reacted.

"I love him," Sirius whispered, eyes softening. "More than anything in the world, Prongs, and I'm not leaving without him. It hurts when he rejects me, but you know? All I want is one chance. One chance to prove that I can make him happy. If you give it to me, I swear I won't screw it up."

James swallowed hard, glancing from Sirius to Remus, who had obvious heard their conversation. The small werewolf's lower lips were trembling. Although Sirius had addressed him, James knew that he meant for Remus to hear.

"Damn, Padfoot, if you hurt him-" James ground his teeth.

"James," Sirius said solemnly. "I am a seeker, and I don't want to wait until the Snitch is rusted."

Nobody else understood what the Death Eater meant, but James felt a stinging blow in his heart. The rusted snitch was the first time he'd lost something important. The first time his father had gotten him a golden Snitch, he and Sirius had played right before a storm. When the rain came down, they still hadn't caught it. Both had caught a cold that day, and a week later when the Snitch was found, it was covered with rust, dead.

James sank, broom slowly dipping towards the ground. Sirius swept past him, and for a moment, their hands touched. A genuine half-smile passed between them, and both knew that despite their loyalties, the years and the vast abyss between them…

Sirius was still Padfoot and James was still Prongs.

The Moon Trimmer floated to a stop before Remus. Slowly, he reached out a hand, outstretched. The unspoken question hung in the air.

"Merlin, Padfoot," Remus said quietly. "This is cruel. I'd already decided, and it was the hardest choice I'd ever made. And now, not an hour afterwards, you're asking me to make it again."

Sirius bit his tongue, almost afraid that anything he said would make the situation worse. Somewhere in the background, the last dragon fell silent and the wizards gradually turned to face them. The Death Eater was painfully aware of the hostile, wary gazes directing at them. He could feel the auras grow deadly and more powerful behind him.

"Moony," he whispered. "I swear, on everything I'd ever held dear in my life, I love you."

Remus reached out. Their fingertips brushed against each other, just as Shacklebolt threw _Avada Kedavra_ their way.

* * *

Author Note: OMG! I HATE writer's block! I'm sorry it took more than a month, but I had to force myself to write even with the block. There were certain parts of this chapter that I just didn't have the inspiration for! I'm so sorry if they suck as much as I think they do. Emi, when looking it over, had joked that it 'sucked more than a vacuum' She said she got that line off of her friend. So technically, a friend of a friend of mine. I have trouble mixing emotion and action into the same set scene, so I'll have to work on that.

One thing I don't like about this is that Sirius is really losing a lot of his darkness… I meant for him to lose a bit, just because of that connecting moment with James, but it turned out badly, so I ended up with this. Sirius _will_ return to be slightly darker in future chapters, and hopefully the transition from dark to light will be more subtle and refined later… bah…

Look on the bright side… it's a long chappie… Heh… I like the ending.

For those of you who were still confused about what happened, I will write a prequel sometime soon, and I hope you guys will read that too. . Anywho, here's a timeline of what happened before: (warns: it's very dark and angsty…)

Before Hogwarts: Remus was bitten by a dominant mating werewolf when he was 7 (cringes) Thank god that werewolf was caught before the mating. Therefore, Remus _technically_ is supposed to be a submissive, but if he was ever to mate, he'd have to pick someone even more submissive than he is. Sirius was trained to be a perfect little Slytherin/dark wizard heir.

First year: They met, Sirius becomes un-darkified becuz of Remus and James… maybe Peter… o.o

Second year: Sirius invites Remus to group, marauders formed.

Third year: Sirius falls in love. James gets crush on Lily (they fell in love the same age as Harry did in the cannon series. O.o)

Fourth year: Nothing happens except James/Sirius seems to like pulling pranks on those they have a crush on.

Fifth year: Sirius confesses to Remus, they become lovers

Sixth year: Still lovers, Remus registers as a werewolf and starts thinking about breaking off ties with Sirius (Werewolves aren't allowed to get married or take lovers.) Sirius notices Remus distancing himself, thinks its bcuz of Snape, pulls the infamous prank.

Summer: Sirius didn't get trials, cuz Ministry doesn't want werewolf events publicized (becuz Remmie's cover will be blown and ppl would protest that they're letting werewolves go to school). Sirius goes to Azkaban.

Seventh year: Sirius is back in school. Remus feels bad. Their relationship is still a little strained. Sirius suggests they become mates, Remus refuses. They have an argument, ended relationship. Remus befriends Snape more. Sirius is insane with jealousy and stuff and nearly rapes Remus. The Ministry, thinking that the only way to keep both of them safe is to keep them apart, tells Remus that he _had_ been raped and puts a restraining order on Sirius. The school year ends. Sirius, at the last possible moment, goes through all the pain and stuff and tells Remus that "you will be mine" line.

Afterwards: Because everyone saw what happened on the train, the Ministry had to expose what happened in sixth year. There were mass hysteria, and ppl demanded that Sirius be caught and put in Azkaban. Siri escapes with grave injuries, and is found by Peter, who was now already a Death Eater. Peter helps him, and then Voldemort offers Siri that if he joined, he'd be able to get Remmie.

Their love is so Canon: Aha! Timeline's just 4 u! And yup! The Godfather Crisis refers to both Harry and Draco and a whole dispute with godfathers and stuff. Anyways. Lol. As u can see, it's not Dobby, it's Kreacher. Dobby comes in later, as the house elf they got after Kreacher was left behind.

Gold Silk: Really? You liked them? Yay! Then you'll probably like the prequel too, even if it's Romance/Angst thingy.

Emi: My ever loyal Mikril-wrin! OKOK more Voldie coming up… Eh… ehehe… I did, didn't I. Ok, I'll use your suggestions and forget about introducing the new strand of plot until next chapter. (Bows down)  
Really? I didn't think it was funny to use 3 part flashbacks… (wince) though I guess now that I think about it it's kinda weird. I'll try to rewrite the last part to make it not so anti-climatic, but I can't promise anything.  
Yup, I'm doing a prequel. (Grins at grammar mistakes) (Dances in ecstasy, Emi reviewed! Yay!) Starbirds 4eva! Rils

Jaderising: Snape will get more of a part, and Sirius does get jealous, but most of that's already happened and in the past. There will be some in this fic, but Remmie and Snape never get romantic feelings for each other. And angst… there's quite heavy angst at certain intervals, don't worry.

Apus-Equuleus: Thankees! And as you can see from this chap, you're right about Draco and Harry! I don't know, I don't have the Ministry as intentionally corrupt or evil or anything (that'd give Voldemort justification to overthrow them or something). They're just not effective at enforcing law and are vastly swayed by the public.

And I would've loved to use your plot, but it makes what Sirius does for Remus later seem a bit insignificant (thinks). The two things are kinda similar though. Don't worry, they'll get together eventually.

It's something to think about… if Remmie never loved Sirius, would he have been like this? Honestly, I don't know (sobs, how could Remmie _not_ love Sirius?). Probably just as devoted, but not so dark… his main justification is that he thinks "Moony doesn't know what he wants or needs." and a sincere belief that he can make it better and stuff. O.o

Nope, werewolves don't need mates, (Moony said that in chap 1). A normal mating is where the sire is the dominant and the one bitten is the submissive, it keeps the balance of power in the bond. This is important to the plot later on, that their bond is abnormal and unnatural. And werewolves mates normally aren't based on love but on lust, that's why they're banned. (Moony was almost mated to that horrible pedophile, shivers)

Lol, and you're the only reviewer that I'd write something this long for! (heart)

Alpha2nd2003: Now you know (grins), I think that was kinda scary if someone called out of my mirror. My, my, both Siri and Remmie are being pitied. I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. (lol)

Leila: O.o… 0.-… '… . … Q.Q… T-T… eh?

Vixen-Ra: Lol. Action it is… (thinks) actually the correct genre should be romance/action… there's quite a bit of it. And CONTINUE! It shouldn't take me to tell you to update! (taken from an DH fic… can't remember the name… Draco was so cool in that fic)

Amaroq: were you crying? Yay! My life mission is done! My Eng teacher said that if your work can make 1 person cry (not at how pathetic it is, but at how sad it is), you've succeeded in making a sad story. And there's more to Remus' refusal than just 'don't want Siri to get hurt' too.

Hannio: Thank you, thank you, thank you very much… eheh. Thank you!

FlamencoPenguin: Oh… hm… (thinks/sulks/reads over) Darn. Ah well, I don't think there's much I can do in the existing chapters, hopefully, as Sirius changes, you'll like him better, ne? James… hm… well, it worked better than last time… they caught Kreacher… and yeah, it was close. But it's just because James didn't quite expect Sirius' werewolf strength and stuff. Technically, he is a better duelist in terms of magical potential. (hint, during school days, Sirius' magic took a _long_ time to take effect) And yup, Draco and Remus will get along, and even be friendly (not that Draco's attitude ever changes _that_ much though). And give me obnoxiousness! I (heart) your abnoxiousness!

Sailor Pride and Yumi-chan: Lucky indeed, I was so embarrassed when I found that the seven year old knew more about Galileo than I did. (gulps) O.o I've never met a person who _loved_ cliffies before… _appreciated_ them, maybe, everyone understands the merits of a good cliffy!

Shinigami: Er… was there a mistake? (Nuuuuoooo!) My friend was right, I really didn't write that part clearly. (sobs) Remmie wasn't raped. Sirius stopped after untying his belt. So right now, as a human, Remus is a virgin. Hm… personally, I thought Sirius had more reason than most to join Voldemort. And according to chapter 3, he never betrayed Lily/James/Harry. Actually… technically, not even Peter betrayed them. And I apologize for the genre. The prequel of this story will be angst, but I thought there was more romance/action/drama in this story as a whole, as it doesn't just concentrate on S/R get-together. What do _you_ say, ficcy? (poke, poke) Yes CAPTAIN! There will be a lemon even if I die from acid poisoning. And I promise it will be as sweet, touching and as consensual as I can make it. Er… would you mind it very much if Remus regretted it like a month afterwards? (not becuz he doesn't like Siri, but bcuz you don't miss something you've never had?)

And what do you mean Snape owes Sirius? Only Remmie, Dumbledore and the Ministry really knew where Siri went over the summer…

OrA-ShiNi-gi: Someone likes _Narcissa_? Whee! You know you make likeable charas when someone likes _Narcissa_! Lol. And they're coming to do more than take Remus away (grins)

Emma Lupin: Oh… eheehee… I'll change that part about the beating up… You're right, it doesn't seem to fit in. I think I kinda thought that… well… obviously I wasn't thinking, lol. Thank you so much!

Andie12: Well, the unnatural bond is going to change their relationship just slightly, but hopefully not in a way that is distasteful. I'm still in a crisis trying to decide how to do the lemon I promised I'd do. Hm… If it is very sweet, do you think they'll look over the graphicness? Hm…

Remus Moony Lupin: Actually, I liked Remus better in the books too. Probably because we are in contact with him more. We all love Sirius because… well, we can't help it. However, there was sooooo much more he could've been if he hadn't exited so early (glares at book five). And of course they will be happily together, if it was going to be a sad ending, I'd put that in the warning. (grins)

Nightmare-chan22: To my ultimate fan, I hope that wasn't TOO disappointing and you'll keep reading. I will get over writer's block, I swear. -0 And hopefully there will be more romance in the upcoming chapters.

Tiffany: Thanks so much for reviewing! Well, I see Sirius' nature as just _slightly_ flexible. Being very lonely since childhood, he is affected by people around him. So when he's around James and others, he will seem like a slightly better person.

A person: Er… I have a feeling that you might be one of the people who are disappointed in Sirius' lack of darkness in this chappie, but I couldn't help it. The only word of comfort that I have for you is that, Sirius' darkness would return in the future. Not to stay though, sorry, cuz I want this essentially to have a nice-Sirius at the end.

Forrest: Updated, and I hope you weren't disappointed in this chappie… It's starting to get very action oriented, which could be a good or bad thing… Well, like I said, Sirius' darkness will return, and he will be trying to find a way to get away from Voldy

larka: Really? I thought chap 4 was quite bland, and although this chapter wasn't bland, it certainly wasn't as good as when I first envisioned it… I just thought it'd be way more powerful than this. (Cuddles with Draco) Thanks!

RoschLupin-Black: Lol, it wasn't much different from the ones I found in other stories though, hm… I'm glad you feel sorry for Sirius! That was the feeling I was hoping to inspire, really. . Actually, this story has changed a lot because of reviews, dunno if that's a good or bad thing.

Eeyaatoe: Not sure if that kind of an attitude is a good thing exactly, I just know that nobody knows what to do with bright children. Treat them like equals? Patronize them? You know… Yay! Addiction is good! That way you may overlook the bad parts of this chapter.

YamikiofAnime: Insane? OMG, please don't. I'll miss all your lovely reviews (sniffs). Anyways, thank you so much for asking me to continue. It's because of reviews that I pulled this chapter out, and no matter how sucky it is… at least it's out…

Next Chapter: The Crimson-stained Room


	6. The Crimson stained Room

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: M, violence, death, torture (not of the sexual kind), sexual situations, coarse language

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, minor deaths, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)… the non-con bit was over in chapter 2.

Type: AU, romance, adventure

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 6: The Crimson-stained Room

The curse had killed him instantly. That was the only thing Remus could think of. He released a choked sob, burying his face against his hands.

That boy! Nineteen and freshly out of Hogwarts. Remus might as well have fired _Avada Kedavra_ himself.

* * *

Flashback: Battlefield

"_Avada Kedavra_!"

Green flashed before him, stretching outwards in that split second like the Hebridean Blacks, wreathed in ghostly flame. Remus' eyes widened, dark pupils shrinking in the intense light. Time seemed to freeze for the two werewolves as the curse reared behind Sirius.

The black haired werewolf never turned, but the same look of terror flickered in his eyes as he saw Remus' expression. Their fingers parted, and Sirius' body seemed to lean slightly back, back towards the curse.

_He's going to die-_ The thought shot through Remus faster than the curse shot towards them. _Oh god, he's going to die-_

Remus was so sure every part of his body died at that moment. His vision blurred as a single Sirius became two. He could practically feel the heat exploding from the curse, inch by inch. A switch shut off his mind in that split second and Remus stopped thinking. He dove forward into Sirius, wrapping desperate arms around his waist.

Remus squeezed his eyes shut, pressing his face into the warm presence of the one he loved. Fine then, let it kill them, but damned, he wasn't going to ever forgive Padfoot if he died alone. If Sirius thought he could push away from him and die, just when he began to accept, he was being stupid.

A peculiar floating sensation overcame him, and a blast of cold wind coursed down through his robes. He waited for oblivion, for the warmth pressed against him to vanish. He waited for the pain to take over.

Shrill screams pierced the air, sending Remus crashing back into reality. He felt every drop of his blood fall back into his veins, cold and stone-weighted. No… what had happened? What in the world had happened?

Warm arms reached forward to wrap around him, and Remus dared crack his eyes open a slit. There was no green light, no blood or torn limbs. There was Sirius, gray eyes wide and disbelieving.

"Wha-" his throat was parched, and Remus glanced beyond the curve of Sirius arm to the scene below them. The two of them stood on an unconscious dragon, the one furthest away from the aurors. There was a fallen figure near the place where they last stood.

The earth was wounded by the killing curse, deep scars burned into the green lawn like claw marks dragged through. The indents continued onto the still figure crumpled nearby.

Brown hair curved around a rather youthful, plain looking face, and the young auror's dark eyes were rapidly glazing over. His mouth was dropped open in a moment of intense disbelief.

Remus' knees weakened, and only Sirius' arms prevented him from falling. It was him. If they hadn't dodged, the boy behind them would've survived. The curse was meant for them, and somehow… somehow it had shifted target.

Even then, some part of him felt a sick, twisted sort of relief. He was glad it was a stranger and not Padfoot. Oh Merlin, he really was a monster. A coward, wishing someone would die in Sirius' stead. Really, he might as well have fired _Avada Kedavra _himself. Seven years since Hogwarts and guilt had never felt closer. He had never felt like such a failure, such a hypocrite.

Sirius wordlessly pressed his stunned mate against him, eyeing Pyrites and two other draconians as they streaked towards them in animal form. He couldn't understand what had happened, except that Remus had leaped upon him and they had instinctively dodged by teleporting. The killing curse should've followed its intended target. But hadn't.

"Black!" Pyrites panted breathlessly, exploding into human form with a loud bang. That distracted the aurors from their stunned grief.

By the time they looked up again, there was no Death Eater to be found. No Remus Lupin either.

End Flashback

* * *

"Padfoot, I don't understand it either," Peter paced listlessly. "The Killing Curse can't be redirected. We all know that! Even if you've physically moved, it follows you. More than that, it's impossible to move faster than a curse. You know it is! You described so many things happening after you realized it was aimed at you. Impossible. It's just not possible. There must be-" 

"Wormtail," Sirius snapped wearily. "Shut up. You've been talking for hours, and I just want to _sleep_." Well, that wasn't really true. He just wanted to lie on his side, watching the quietly brooding Remus on the bed next to his.

"Yeah," Peter echoed, swallowing. "You're going into a recuperating rest soon, so your magic can rebuild after the fight. Don't worry, I'll be here to wake you up if anything happens."

As soon as they had been transported back to the hideout, Sirius had automatically sensed the danger. Despite being at the top of the Death Eater hierarchy, or perhaps because of it, he had many enemies amongst the lower ranked dark wizards. They resented his easy way with the Dark Lord, his family fortune, and his unplaced fondness of muggles.

Malfoy, it turned out, was even more hated. With him, it was because they feared him. Lucius knew everything about everyone. It seemed as if, even if you _thought_ about betraying the Dark Lord, he would be onto you, cold calculating eyes trapping you in his pace. Well, now that Sirius knew about the Mirror Walk, Malfoy was no longer to be feared. One was safe where there were no mirrors.

If Sirius had shown up alone, he wouldn't have worried, but with Malfoy's wife and child in tow, he decided it was best to find a sanctuary at the hideout.

He chose the infirmary. Peter was there, and he knew the place better than any other Death Eater. The conjoining room to the infirmary was half hidden by a curtain much like those around the sick-beds. Unless you look closely, you would never see the second room where the Malfoys were.

But it nagged at him, how they had escaped certain death. Even Shacklebolt wasn't such an incompetent wizard that he couldn't fire the Death Curse properly. At that point Sirius didn't even have a stronger magic aura than the damned auror. Especially magic-spent and deprived two nights of proper sleep.

Peter had remembered an appointment elsewhere, and quickly apologized to a gloomy Remus before leaving. But they were safely enclosed in the four walls of the hospital, with the Malfoys in the next room. With that thought in mind, Sirius felt himself slowly drifting off, the soft hum of Peter's pet clabbert by his ears.

"Lupin?"

Remus rolled to his side at the little boy's voice. Sirius had long since nodded off, and the infirmary had a warm atmosphere that eased some of Remus' anxiety. But still, the dull eyes of the young man from that morning flashed before his eyes whenever he blinked. He managed a slight lift of his lips as he sat up and shifted in the hospital bed to make room.

Hesitantly, Draco pulled himself up beside him, still keeping a healthy distance between them.

"I have a question," he proclaimed, eyes glaring at Remus as if the werewolf was going to refuse. This time, Remus didn't have to force his face muscles to work as a genuine smile crept up.

"Of course, but first, Draco, is your mother alright?"

Draco sent him a guarded look. "She threw up, but if you tell anyone I told you, I'll hex you. Malfoys aren't supposed to throw up. It's disgraceful."

"I see, I'll keep the secret," Remus smiled.

"Black forced you to come here, didn't he?" Draco managed to look superior. "You are the enemy. You are definitely in danger here, and I can help you get out, for a price."

Remus blinked, a twisting feeling wound up his insides. Holding his breath, he mentally counted to three before sagging down against the bed. The same thought had tormented him for hours, as much as his guilt had. "I…" he swallowed. "I don't know. I came willingly. What do you propose to do?"

"I'll let your precious friends know where you are," Draco said easily. "_And_ I'll lend you my cloak. Nobody'll notice a thing."

"And what is the price?"

"Take m-" Draco snapped his mouth shut and looked away. His mouth opened several times more, but didn't continue. Shifting uneasily, his hands fisted in the white hospital blankets. "Nevermind."

Remus felt a frown cross his face. The boy was emitting a strange aura of confusion. But he thought he could sense what was being asked. Funny, how his aura senses seemed so heightened in the last day or so. It was as if Remus had been wearing a thick sweater for the past years, and now, his skin tingled with every emotion that ran through his surroundings. Draco noticed his gaze and snapped. "What? I changed my mind, that's all."

"Draco, I'd be more than happy to take you in," Remus said quietly. "But I can't now. My own life is too messed up. Do you understand? I need to- sort out things for myself first. So I can't leave yet, not now… when I'd just gone insane and somehow thought… this could work."

A small crunched sound informed the werewolf that Draco was grinding his teeth tightly against each other. To what purpose, he didn't know. He reached out a hand.

"You're going to have no teeth left if you keep on doing that," Remus said quietly. "I would know, that's what happened to Ernie Prang. He drives the Knight Bus now, and he'd always ground his teeth so loud we'd have trouble falling asleep in the-"

"You really would let me live with you?" Draco interrupted. "You'd just met me this morning. And you hate the Malfoys, don't you?"

"I know, but you're a good kid, Draco, never doubt that."

The boy looked suddenly uncomfortable. "I'm not asking because I like you or any other nonsense," he said forcefully, dropping himself back on the bed and letting his feet plop back against the sheets. "It's just that, it's so bloody _quiet_ at home. Nothing ever happens and _nobody_ ever talks. And you talk entirely too much, that's all."

Remus laughed at that, spirits lifting. "I'm a diplomat, I make a living out of talking."

Out of the corner of his eyes, Remus saw the clabbert lounging around the roof light up. The hard pebble-like hardening in its forehead was a deep, screaming red. Draco followed his gaze a flinched as the bulb flashed once more.

On the third flash, fourth year Hogwarts hit Remus like a physical blow.

"Draco, go back to your room. Quietly, and don't argue with me." The boy must have sensed the grimness in his soft voice, for he hesitated only a moment before hastily complying. The door clicked shut behind him, just as the door the infirmary slid open.

Remus took a deep breath and looked up to see three Death Eaters silently pad into the room. He only recognized one of them; Macnair, who had worked for the Ministry before he was found out to be the enemy. An unexplainable fear coursed through him. The sleeping werewolf on the bed next to his was a large, warm presence in the room, and Remus suddenly had the urge to wake him. Let Sirius handle the Death Eaters and he would be safe… safe…

_What am I thinking about,_ Remus shook his head, trying to clear his muddled thought. Was this another part of werewolf mating that he was feeling? An instinctive reliance on his dominant half?

He cleared his throat. "Can I help you, gentlemen?"

"Remus Lupin," one of them began, an eyebrow lifting in disdain. "The werewolf… Black's little bitch." He paused, a leer surfacing on his face. "I suppose I can see why he was so smitten."

The Death Eater's words stun, but Remus wasn't called the Golden-tongued Moonchild for nothing. There wasn't a single trace of hurt on his face. "If you want to see it that way, yes," he said mildly. "I _am_ the werewolf of the Order. And I am guessing that the Dark Lord sent you?"

The Death Eater snorted, then glanced nervously over one shoulder before answering. "Our Lord wants to see you. Come with us."

Remus had to take a deep breath to calm himself. "Of course," he replied, shifting shakily to his feet. "Allow me a few moments."

"He doesn't like to be kept waiting, Lupin," Macnair snarled. "This isn't the Ministry. Dumbledore and your little followers aren't here to save you."

"I understand," Remus raised his voice just a whisper, fighting to keep the composed half-smile on his face. "but I think your lord would rather I show up ready to talk than half dressed after just rolling out of bed." He straightened the long, loose hospital garb Peter had given him for emphasis.

The Death Eaters made no move to leave. "We are to bring you to him _now_."

"He will have to wait," Remus replied, turning his back on them to pick up Sirius' robe, which was folded across the head of the bed. He frowned inwardly. It wasn't as if dress was a big deal, but he couldn't stand the thought of giving in without exerting some of his own will.

"We have permission to use force," one Death Eater growled, and Remus heard the tightening of fingers upon wands.

"You could," he replied stiffly, "but I wouldn't embarrass myself if I was in your place." The fear had grown larger, but there was no way Remus would let himself succumb to it. He _will_ not disgrace the Order, not in front of Voldemort himself. With a deliberate slowness, he shrugged on the robe over his hospital garb, buttoning the front meticulously.

The inevitable meeting with Voldemort was like poison. He couldn't stop thinking about it, or stop fearing it. He had never personally encountered the Dark Wizard, but had seen enough results of those encounters. People that met the man had a tendency to die… mutilated, _Crucio_-drenched, both mind and will broken. And the last thought scared him the most.

No auror, no member of the Order had ever survived an encounter with Voldemort and his thugs unbroken. The Longbottoms, the sweetest family Remus had ever known was at St. Mungos gibbering nonsense and screaming every time their door opened. Benji Fenwick was found in bits, and rumor has it that his wife still dreams of him being torn limb from limb, shred from shred, night after night after yet another night. Dorkas Meadowes, their only other spy… well… Remus wasn't sure if he was dead yet, rotting away somewhere in Voldemort's dungeon, kept alive only to feel the pain.

His heart clenched. And the scariest of them all… Alastor had changed after meeting Voldemort face to face. That incident had robbed him of an eye and put a sort of… darkness in him. He became fanatical about extracting revenge in the most painful of ways. The maniacal way Alastor handled Death Eaters, and his mindless obsession with their capture, told Remus more about Voldemort's tortures than any broken aurors had.

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Remus smiled pleasantly. "Lead the way."

* * *

Draco knew true strength when he saw it. As he watched through the small gap between the door and the wall, he felt truly humbled. There was no doubt in his own mind that he could be brave if he wanted to, but Remus' was the most elegant courage he had ever seen. Elegant… perfectly in control, and the half smile unwavering on his face. It was far more effective than Black's smirk, his mother's sharp words, or even his father's stern voice. 

He didn't know power could exist in such a graceful manner.

Draco crouched there for a couple seconds after the Death Eaters and the werewolf left. He stole a glance at his mother, whose face was deathly pale and sprawled in a particularly un-Malfoy-like manner between the sheets. His lips turned down for a moment before he swung the door open and approached his uncle's bed.

"Black!" He snapped. "Wake up! You need to go save someone." The black haired werewolf stirred and mumbled something under his breath, but didn't wake.

"Black!" Draco stood on tip-toes to shout in the man's ear. "They've called him to see the Dark Lord! Black! Remus Lupin, you hear?"

Suddenly, a hand reached up and grabbed his collar. Draco gasped as he lost his balance and from nowhere, a wand appeared to press against the bridge of his nose. He leaned down on his elbows to avoid falling.

Angry gray eyes were staring at him. Draco swallowed.

"What," Sirius' voice was dangerously low, "did you just say?" All trace of sleep had vanished from his face. The man's grip tightened as he saw that Remus was missing. Draco angrily yanked at the hand holding him.

"I _said_," he spat, "that they took him to see the Dark Lord. You were too much of a slug to even wake up! Let go!" With a growl, Sirius dropped him, turning roughly away.

"Damned that little idiot didn't even wake me up!" He kicked the bed in frustration before storming towards the door. "That bastard Voldemort, sneaky, under handed-" and followed with a string of curses, half of which Draco had problems understanding.

"Black," Draco retorted, trying to gain back some of the dignity, and not liking the fact that he was being ignored. "You're not venturing out in your nightshirt."

Sirius looked down at his outfit, then looked back up at Draco. There was a hard glint in his eyes and his voice was very matter of fact when he spoke. "Screw the nightshirt."

With that, he was out of the hospital, white hospital robe flowing. Draco blinked. How the man had managed to look so formidable with only a nightshirt on was beyond him. The boy hesitated for a brief moment, keenly realizing how alone he was in the hospital, before grabbing his cloak and Black's and running out the door after the man.

Sirius was two halls down and it was a miracle that Draco caught up, panting from the all out sprint. The man raised an eyebrow at him, but was too busy worrying to acknowledge him any other way.

"I'm not doing this for you," Draco huffed angrily, tossing the cloak at the man. He had to run to keep up with Sirius' long strides, and that wasn't doing very much for his self-esteem.

"I thought I told you to stay at the hospital where it's safer," Sirius muttered distractedly, not slowing.

"When did you say that?" Draco demanded. "The only thing you told me to do was 'screw the nightshirt,' and I can't believe you say that _I'm_ the rude one."

"Hm," Sirius spared a frown in his direction, too distracted to react to Draco's words. "I meant to say it. Get back to the hospital, Malfoy."

"No."

Sirius stopped, eyes narrowing. "That wasn't a request, Malfoy. That was an order."

"I don't take orders from werewolves," Draco said, voice deliberately cruel. Truly, at that moment, he wasn't too happy with the black haired werewolf. From what Draco could see, Lupin was the most accepting person that could exist. Black had to have done something terribly wrong for his mate to be so distrustful.

They held each other's gazes for a moment, before Sirius let out a barking laugh, half from amusement, and half from an emotion Draco could not recognize. "In a few years, Malfoy," he said. "I have a rule. I don't take toddlers on missions."

And with a twirl of his robe, Sirius was down the hall again. Draco clenched his fists. Damned Black for making him feel inferior every single time! He wasn't a kid! That was it! He was going to find Lupin before Black, see how he feels then!

Sprinting, Draco crashed back inside the hospital room and slipped into the back where he and his mother had been. He skidded to a stop before the mirror, staring hard at his own reflection before bringing his hands together.

"Alright," he whispered. "I'll show you, Black. Bloody… arrogant… _adult_."

* * *

"You're not serious!" He growled, gray eyes boring into the unfortunate Death Eater outside the familiar door. Sirius couldn't remember what the man's name was, but that was not important. 

Voldemort had moved. He had been in the blue teacher's office ever since they'd moved to this hideout. If he didn't have some darker plot in mind, Sirius swore he wasn't a wizard. Merlin, Moony… what was happen to Moony while the idiot before him stuttered and tried to escape his question? Voldemort wouldn't- would he? His heart was pounding so loud he barely heard anything the other man said.

"Yeah… Our Lord ch-changed rooms last night. Said… he f-f-fancied a color change. Hasn't been here s-ahh-ge-"

His fear for his mate had turned to anger. Sirius grabbed the man's throat. The man's eyes bulged out of his face, and his hands reached up, clawing desperately at Sirius' wrists. In his fury, the werewolf felt a smallest twinge of satisfaction as he squeezed hard, cutting off the other Death Eater's air briefly.

What if he was too late? Dear Merlin… what if they had hurt him? He'd kill them all! Damn it! If they touched him, they were all going to _die_. His throat constricted strangely, and Sirius had the most disgraceful urge to throw up.

"Talk fast," he hissed. "They may be your last words." This had the opposite effect, as the man began to blubber, frightened by the almost insane glint in Sirius' eyes.

"Please- I- I don't know anything! I'm just cleaning up the room! I swear! Le- le- let me go! I- I don't want to die-"

"Useless _worm_!" Sirius spat, easily tossing the man aside. "You could've just _said_ that you were useless. Get out of my way!"

The man, not being able to move fast enough, had a particularly nasty hex tossed at him as he leaned over and began coughing up the dust bunnies he was trying to destroy.

* * *

As Remus stepped into the room, his sense of dread only increased. The room was blood colored. Dark red drapes lined every window, and the carpet was a rich, rich red that sent Remus' werewolf instincts tingling. Relatively, it was a smaller room than he'd imagined, which only contributed to the nervous tension in his chest. 

Voldemort himself was seated at a large oak-polished table, perfectly at ease and not a strand of his black hair was out of place. His eyes were gleaming red and focused, lit with amusement as he watched Remus enter. For all purposes, the Dark Lord seemed to give off the same eagerness as those going to see a movie.

The guards quietly clicked the door shut behind him, and it took every ounce of Remus' willpower to keep his legs from trembling. He lifted his gaze to the Death Eaters standing behind Voldemort, and his blood ran cold.

Regulus Black, the young Bartemius Crouch, Karkaroff and Severus Snape. The only ones that could be suspected of being spies. _They are onto him,_ Remus thought desperately, _they suspect that Severus is the spy._ He let his gaze wash across the line of Death Eaters, lingering momentarily on Sirius' brother. He'd have an excuse for that.

"The golden-tongued moonchild," Voldemort sat back, a satisfied smile on his face. "Have a seat, please."

"Of course," Remus returned the smile, and quickly sat before the older wizard could see the tremble in his limbs. He had decided, he would maintain this… civilized banter… for as long as he could. Definitely, he won't be the first to lose control. "There was something you wanted to talk about?"

"Well, let's start off with this. Tell me a little bit about yourself… Remus," Voldemort said easily. "I must say I find you… interesting." Remus' mind raced to think of a comeback. He raised his eyebrows.

"Dark Lord, I'd always been under the impression that you preferred women," he allowed his lips to turn slightly upwards with the remark. There, that was offensive enough to communicate his absolute loathing for the man in front of him, but not rude enough to inspire anger, he hoped.

Voldemort blinked. This frail-looking young wizard was bold, and though it was obvious that he was afraid, there was no sign that the fear would take over. The Dark Wizard took the chance to scrutinize the one his follower had been obsessed with for seven years.

He could see where Sirius Black was coming from, truly. The tawny haired werewolf was definitely attractive, though Voldemort would be hard pressed to say how. He had a slender bone structure, with a straight nose and lips as kissable as any woman's. However, it was the pair of haunting, golden eyes that caught his attention. There was something unsettling, unearthly about them. There was an unnatural color enhanced by unnaturally long lashes in those eyes that were bigger than the normal person's.

And Remus Lupin moved strangely. Most prominent people seemed to have a presence. You would be able to see strength in the way they walked, a confidence, perhaps, exerting one's presence. That wasn't the case with the werewolf. He floated, and every gesture from his elegant hands seemed effortless, graceful. His presence was ephemeral, as if he wasn't truly there.

Perhaps the great Voldemort lusting after men wasn't truly so far fetched after all.

"I'd been under the same impression myself," Voldemort fixed his dark eyes on the werewolf's. And with those unusual eyes, he couldn't be sure if Remus Lupin held his gaze or not. "First, tell me, you and my follower Sirius Black are bonded and he is the dominant, am I correct?"

Remus swallowed. "Yes," he said, voice barely above a whisper, willing himself not to shift, not to flinch at Voldemort's gaze, which felt wrong… very, very wrong. "That would be correct, Dark Lord."

"I want to know how much… control… Sirius has over you." Voldemort smiled, handsome face stretching to accommodate the warm expression. "To what extent do you have to obey him?"

_Think Remus, think!_ The werewolf drew in a deep breath before answering. The only way to keep a lead was to say the unexpected. "I do not know, Dark Lord. If you lend me your wand, I might find out."

There was a pause as Voldemort and the Death Eaters tried to understand the request. Crouch was about to speak, fury in his voice, before Karkaroff and Regulus grabbed his arm and Snape nervously stepped in front of him so that Voldemort wouldn't notice.

Crouch never had any sense of self-preservation. He served Voldemort blindly with everything he had, even indulging in Voldemort obsession with torture. He loved the Dark Lord so unconditionally… it was suspicious. The young Death Eater, barely older than Snape and Sirius, did not even understand that Voldemort thought him a spy. If he drew attention from Voldemort, there was a possibility that the Dark Lord would simply kill them all.

At the same time, Snape was desperately trying to get the idiot werewolf to just _shut up_. What Remus was doing wasn't courageous, it was foolish. Voldemort may act gentlemanly and amiable, but he had _never_ allowed his followers to talk back. Malfoy and Black were exceptions, but the Dark Lord needed them too much to care.

"Dark Lord," Remus cocked his head. "Do you not trust me?"

Voldemort laughed then, a disturbingly pleasant sound that sent chills up every spine in the room. A hand carelessly drew open the single drawer on his desk and emerged with a wand. Yew… 13½ inches… with a feather from Fawkes.

Remus couldn't quite believe his eyes as Voldemort handed him the wand, handle first. He took it silently, holding the wand, three inches longer than his own, gingerly between both hands.

Voldemort strained to hear the spell the werewolf cast, but the words were foreign to him. He frowned as he recognized the strange, twisting dialect used by the pyrelings. Instantly, a small book without a title fell into Remus' lap.

The wand was carefully set back on the table as Remus opened the book. His eyes paused briefly to read a passage before he looked up.

"The dominant werewolf is physically stronger, faster, and far more capable than the submissive," Remus read emotionlessly. "Regardless that both will surpass humans in all fields. The submissive cannot disobey a directly given order-"

Golden eyes widened. _That isn't right,_ he shook his head lightly. _He- he's given me those before, but I haven't- I didn't-_

"Interesting," Voldemort hummed. A contemplative smile hung by his lips. "There are no limits to this?"

Wordlessly, Remus passed the book over. The passages ventured further to say that in reference to the werewolves' ancient instincts, the orders will be subconsciously obeyed if subconsciously given. If the submissive was consciously fighting the bond, they may wear out their powers and break their own wills.

_A direct order cannot be disobeyed,_ Remus knew something was wrong. _That wasn't how it worked._ _There is something wrong with our bond.

* * *

_

Flashback from Chapter 3

"Kiss me," Sirius ordered, gray eyes staring into his. The force behind their bond hummed in the back of his head. For a moment, Remus was fearful, and his hands unconsciously went around his mate's waist. They closed the distance between them.

It had felt wonderful… like it had always been… in school… school… Their faces were so close… and Remus felt warm breath play over his lips.

The white scarf inside his pocket spilled out, draping itself against the bed. Remus' eyes left Sirius' for a moment as he saw the scarf. This… this was nothing like what they had at school. The kiss was turned away before their lips met. "No," he gasped, a hint of panic in his voice. "No, I'm not- going to kiss you."

And it seemed as if the world had just broken in half. All the warm feelings in between them seemed to be washed away. The arms by his waist fell away. Sirius snatched the scarf up furiously.

Their gaze met, and Remus felt light-headed. Power surged through him. Any feelings of submission left him, and he was suddenly angry.

End Flashback

* * *

"… are you?" 

Remus blinked. Pulled violently from the memory. He had no idea what had just been asked. Voldemort stared at him, as if expecting an answer. Desperately, he let his gaze slip to Snape, who looked back at him in disgust before mouthing something.

He was tempted to groan. What Snape had mouthed looked remarkably like 'egsh,' but if Remus started talking about eggs, Voldemort would definitely kill him. Using every bit of his diplomatic intuition, Remus closed his eyes.

"My… my age?" he managed.

"Yes, it surprised me that someone so young could be such an experienced envoy." Voldemort's smile was still patient, and both Snape and Remus breathed a sigh of relief. Remus looked up, slightly more confident.

"I believe you were twenty-two when I was born," Remus replied.

Voldemort had to pause to calculate this, distracting him momentarily from the werewolf. That would make the younger wizard twenty-four. The Dark Wizard felt an annoyance sweep up his chest. Arithmancy had never been his favorite subject. That also made him feel… older, older than he usually thought of himself.

"Fresh out of Auror training, I see," he picked up his pen to tap on the table.

"The… Ministry decided that werewolf blood would make my aura control too offensive to be a true auror," Remus said quietly. "I wasn't allowed to finish school in the end."

"I see…" Voldemort closed the book in his hands and handed it back. "That is unfortunate. Can you tell me anything about Dumbledore's goals… Remus? Do you not wish to liberate your kind from the Ministry's oppression?"

Remus swallowed. "I _can_ help you, Dark Lord. And honestly, I might've once, being angry at how my kind is treated. But I've grown to love the world as it is. I would do anything to protect it. Including letting my kind be oppressed and discriminated against. Including being chased out of every store, banned from every job, and the possibility of werewolf concentration camps."

A genuine smile floated on his lips. "I believe there are things worth sacrificing for."

Voldemort could not deny that it was possibly the brightest smile he'd ever seen. However, that only began to irritate him. That serene expression was too distracting. The honest words clashing against everything he believed in. Combined, altogether too much of a challenge to his power.

How wrong he'd been. He'd underestimated Dumbledore's top ambassador. _It is truly amazing what a pretty face can do for you in this age._

It wasn't just a pretty face. He swallowed. From the moment the werewolf entered the room, despite all the difference in power, Remus Lupin had been quietly in charge. Voldemort had initiated their talk, asking all the questions, but try as he might, he didn't control the direction of their conversation. He was being manipulated, yet he couldn't seem to turn the tables.

"So you won't tell me anything," he asked silkily.

"I apologize," Remus lowered his head a little. When he looked up, there was a determined glint in his eyes. "And now you can drop the act. I detest you and everything you stand for. I may be uncertain of my situation, but I know where my loyalties."

"Very well," Voldemort stood and gestured to the Death Eaters behind him. Snape stiffened, as did Karkaroff and Regulus. Crouch looked strangely eager. "Make him talk."

Remus' hands tightened around the book, but he managed to expel the fear from his face.

"My Lord," Crouch swung himself around the table. "Are you suggesting torture?"

Voldemort fixed him with a cold look. "I did not say that. Use whatever means is the most efficient."

"My Lord," Snape said. "I have to protest. Black specifically said that no one is to touch him. If we do, he might really betray us."

"I agree," Regulus said uncertainly. "And he's bound to find out. My brother… finds out about everything. And besides, Lupin may be the enemy, but he was never that… _bad_, really."

"You're just wimps," Crouch snapped. He bowed to Voldemort. "My Lord, I will oversee this. Can you…" he smiled. "Can you hold him down for me, my Lord?"

The Dark Wizard said nothing, eyes narrowed at Crouch. Remus felt a chill creep around his arms and legs, tying him securely to the chair. Clenching his teeth, he tested the bonds, never letting his eyes leave Crouch's.

"I know how to do it so that even Black would be deceived," Crouch boasted. He picked up a pen from Voldemort's table, tested the ink before transfiguring the tip into a thick metal needle. The point was so sharp that Remus had to squint to see it. It gradually widened into the rest of the pen.

_Merlin, oh God…_ Remus shut his eyes tightly. _Padfoot… help me. _However, his voice was light when he spoke. "Do your worse, Crouch."

* * *

M-rated Scene for Violence and Torture (not of the sexual kind), please refrain from reading if you are easily disturbed

_Scratch, scratch, scratch_. Remus watched dully as Crouch carved three long indents into Voldemort's table. The older wizard frowned, but said nothing.

Darting to him, Crouch grabbed Remus' hand, positioning the needle. "Now," he grinned. "You see what I am about to do, correct?"

Through sickening fear, Remus managed a smile. "Yeah, far too clearly."

The other Death Eaters had turned slightly green, and Snape's lips were pressed more tightly together than usual.

Pain shot up from Remus' index finger as Crouch pressed the head of the needle against the space between his finger and nail. Warm blood welled up, spilling onto the long needle. Remus gritted his teeth, hands involuntarily jerking from their bonds as Crouch drove the needle in. Blood slowly seeped from the wound as the nail came loose. He rammed his head back against the chair, breathing harshly.

His finger was on fire! Crouch jerked the needle and scraped at the soft flesh under his nail. Remus' other hand instinctively tried to cover his scream, but Voldemort's bonds remained. He sagged sideways as his fingernail was lifted off his finger and pulled. He was panting harshly, and it was all he could do to keep his screams bottled in.

"My, you have very small fingers, Lupin," Crouch said conversationally. "But of course, I heard that it hurts a lot either way." The pain was incredible. Remus pressed himself against the side of the chair, fingers going lax in Crouch's grip.

"Now, do you have anything to tell us?"

Trying to regain his breath, Remus glared up at Crouch. The man was barely older than he was, but the maniacal smile on his face had twisted the once pleasant features into something old and ugly. Remus' finger throbbed, but the needle had been drawn away.

"You're pathetic," Remus whispered, glad that his voice was unwavering. "Do you take pleasure from this? Torturing for that wretched excuse for a wizard? Inflicting pain on those weaker than you? I'm not going to give you that satisfaction."

"We'll see," Crouch growled, moving onto the next finger. The pain was just as intense as the first. Perhaps even more so, with the first finger still bleeding, nail popped out at an angle.

Against his will, a slight cry escaped his throat. His mouth felt dry as he coughed, sinking down. His eyes felt hot, as if he was about to cry. Remus swallowed hard, closing his eyes and tried to focus on something other than the pain in his fingertips. _This is less painful than full moon,_ he told himself. _You can stand this much._

But it wasn't the same, Merlin… Not with his senses heightened by werewolf blood and the enemies in the room. Not when there were people watching his pain. The pain during full moons had felt lonely and safe. He was free to scream, to scratch at himself to distract the pain.

With a decisive jerk, Crouch ripped one bloodstained nail clean off his finger. Remus bit down into his tongue, struggling for a brief moment before he forced himself to relax. Unconsciousness swam closer.

Crouch leaned in next to his ear. "Did you know, Lupin?" He said in a hushed mocking voice. "The Longbottoms. I was the one who broke them, just like I'm going to break you. You're going to tell us every-"

Remus' eyes snapped open. _Him._ Golden eyes grew hard. _He was the one._ The one who had destroyed everything about that sweet Hufflepuff prefect he did his rounds with and her boyfriend, Frank. For a moment Remus' vision blackened. Memories of open, blank eyes, terrified faces reared up in him. He swooned on the edge of consciousness.

"Barty…" he whispered faintly, shakily aware of Voldemort watching his every move. "Barty, have you betrayed us?" His voice was so faint they could barely hear it. "Betrayed Dumbledore? Barty… why… you don't have to go… so far… to gain… trust."

For a moment Remus was out of it. When he came to a couple seconds later, Crouch was staring at him in disbelief and horror. Remus remembered what he'd said and paled.

He'd been so furious he'd pinned the role of spy on Crouch, who was possibly Voldemort's most loyal follower. Somehow, unconsciously, he'd said all the right things and pulled all the right strings. Remus lifted his gaze to Voldemort, who was frowning, and Snape, who had a mixed expression on his face.

"Why you little-" Crouch grabbed his thumb and drove in the needle again. Unprepared, Remus cried out. He nearly blacked out again as Voldemort snapped out an order.

"That's enough, Bartemius, we'll continue this later."

"Just a little more, my Lord," Crouch growled, eyes nearly insane. He twisted the needle, and Remus' thumb bent sideways as the nail broke.

End M-rated Scene

* * *

Suddenly, Crouch was jerked away by an invisible force. He crashed headlong against the bookshelf, splitting his lip. A groan sounded from his throat as the man slid down the to the floor. 

"I said, that's enough," Voldemort said pleasantly. Remus lurched forward as he felt restraints around his limbs ease away. Silently, he tried to stand, feeling his knees wobble beneath him. One bloody hand, now entirely numb with pain, he raised to cradle against his chest.

The door opened with a bang. Remus looked up through blurry eyes. The panting figure that stood at the door was possibly the most beautiful thing Remus had ever seen. Handsome face flushed with exertion, long black hair barely settling about broad shoulders, Sirius was bristling with barely suppressed power. "Bastards," he gritted in a low voice. "You swore you wouldn't touch him!"

In a flash, Remus felt himself jerked upright and drawn into a tight embrace. His face pressed against the familiar scent of the ocean. Warm arms gently lifted his injured hand. Remus didn't have the willpower to struggle, nor would it be wise to do so before the Dark Lord.

_Voldemort still thinks Padfoot has control over my actions,_ his eyes flickered shut briefly, pushing the gushing wound, mutilated flesh to the back of his mind. _It is better to let him continue thinking that._ He succumbed to his instincts, allowing himself to go limp against his mate's chest.

"Who did it?" Sirius growled, steely gray eyes searching the group. Slowly, he allowed himself to fall into a crouched position, gaze flickering to an object on the ground. "Which one of you did it?"

"He did it himself, Black," Crouch snapped, groaning as his muscles protested. He pointed at the scratch marks on Voldemort's desk, voice slowly becoming self-important. "He tried to attack, and broke his own nails, foolish creature."

In a flash Sirius had snatched up the transfigured pen from the floor and flung it hard. Crouch barely had time to gasp before the needle point entered his flesh, tunneling through his shoulder and pinning him against the bookshelf. The man howled in pain and Remus tensed. He half turned to watch his tormentor, who whimpered at the intense pain in his shoulder.

"How would you explain that _thing_ then?" Sirius stood, Remus allowed himself to be supported by the larger man's arms. When Crouch didn't answer, his eyes narrowed. "You are going to die," Sirius hissed. "I'm going to rip your throat out with my bare hands."

Dread filled Remus as he bit his lips. Sirius was completely insane. He spoke of death so easily. There was a sinking feeling in Remus' heart. Why in the world had he thought that this could work? This… wasn't the man he'd fallen in love with… not at all.

Much to everyone's surprise, it was Regulus that spoke up, stepping quickly between Sirius and Crouch. An unreadable expression hung on his face, which was skinnier than Sirius' and looked slightly malnourished instead of handsome. "Back off," he said, voice angry. "You're such a freak, Sirius. If I could, I'd deny that I was ever related to you."

Sirius blinked, momentarily taken aback, and Regulus plowed ahead. "First you go and betray your own family by getting into Gryffindor, then you fall in love with a werewolf of all things and get turned yourself, and," he glared. "_Every_ bloody little thing that goes wrong has you out for blood."

Remus couldn't decide if it was courage or insanity that took over Sirius' brother, whom he had not really liked, but never particularly hated either. Regulus shoved Sirius back a few steps. "He broke your little werewolf's hand, so what? You just stabbed his shoulder. Call it even."

For a moment, Sirius only stared at Regulus through half-slit eyes, a low growl rumbling at the back of his throat. Regulus' lecture hadn't been welcomed, but it did make Sirius aware of the tense situation he was under. He was in a room surrounded by Voldemort and the Death Eaters, doing something the others would find… highly traitorous. He found it highly unfair. _The damned bastard broke his promise,_ Sirius fumed. _And I must be the one to hold back?_

"Watch your back, Crouch," he hissed, before turning abruptly on his heel, an arm wrapped possessively around Remus. "I _do_ hold grudges."

His dark gaze met Voldemort's, and for a split second, pure loathing seeped from Sirius' gaze. The Dark Lord flinched. In the many years Sirius Black had been under his service, he thought he had understood the young man. Whenever his object of desire was threatened, the man lost all sanity. His defense of the Order's werewolf seemed like an obsession, maddened and deprived of logic.

This was different, the churning anger in the younger wizard's gray eyes were sharp and clear like a winter morning. There was no mindless rage, only carefully calculated emotion.

Sirius had changed in the three short days he had been mated. And Voldemort felt irritation build up within him. His gaze shifted to the shorter man beside his follower and found Remus Lupin's haunting golden gaze upon him.

He opened his mouth, prepared to dismiss Sirius and somehow recover some of his authority. However, before he could speak, the black haired wizard had turned with a flourish and left the room. Voldemort pressed his lips tightly together. He had learned nothing from that session. Not that he had expected to, but neither had he expected to lose face before the most suspicious of his followers.

Damn the werewolves. Damn both of them. Inwardly, Voldemort seethed.

"May we take our leave, my Lord?" Snape asked. Voldemort shot a deathly, piercing look in his direction, and it was all Snape could do not to flinch.

There was a potent pause draping in the air, before the Dark Lord dispersed it with a wave. He turned back to the papers on his desk dismissively as his study door clicked open.

"Bartemius," he said suddenly. "You are not dismissed yet." Crouch looked apprehensive for a brief second before letting the door fall shut behind his fellow Death Eaters. Even he could tell Voldemort was not in a good mood.

"Was there something you wanted, my Lord?" The man asked hesitantly. Voldemort said nothing. "I- I apologize, my Lord. I was just so angry… Lupin was just so… _infuriating_, so bloody arrogant and composed. I couldn't help it. It wasn't my fault. Forgive me, my Lord. I- I only ever did it for you."

"I have not said anything, Bartemius," Voldemort said silkily. His cloudy red eyes lifted to observe his follower. No… perhaps he did learn something. "Do you have anything you want to admit to me?"

Crouch's eyes lit up. "But I can't, my Lord. My thoughts are… disrespectful."

Anger simmered in the older wizard's chest. His hands twitched. Crouch's antics had been amusing at first, and it was oddly flattering to think that he could inspire such loyalty. But then that turned to suspicion. Loyalty yes, but Voldemort wasn't the type to inspire unconditional love. Nobody would ever follow him without an ulterior goal. So Voldemort was suspicious, and now, Crouch's words were driving him to near insanity.

He propped his chin against his palm, feeling the heavy weight of his dark hair settle against his back. "Never mind that, speak."

"If you insist, my Lord," Crouch's gaze fell to the floor. "It's Black. Sirius Black. My Lord, we don't need a traitor like him! He- he will betray you without a second thought! My Lord, why don't we just get rid of him! There's nothing good in that one. He will never serve you like I do."

So now the pretentious snake was trying something else! Voldemort's hands gripped for his wand. Crouch knew perfectly well; without Sirius Black, they would be severely disadvantaged against the old fool Dumbledore.

_If those are not the words of a spy, a double-crosser, I don't know what is,_ Voldemort thought furiously.

"You, child," Voldemort said, voice eerily quiet. "How long are you going to eavesdrop?" He swirled his chair around just in time to see afrightened child's face surrounded by silky blond hairfrantically disappearing from his mirror surface.

The sounds of a shattered mirror filled the room.

* * *

Snape was the last Dead Eater to leave them. All five wizards had practically ran from Voldemort's study, and only stopped when they were several halls away. Snape gave Remus a long look, calculating his options before stepping up to them. Sirius was too busy with a healing spell for Remus' hand to object. 

"I think you fooled him this time, Lupin," he said. "It is unfortunate, but a good card that you framed Crouch. You were far too reckless and idiotic, but… good call." He glanced at Sirius, whose face was still drawn and angry, then back at Remus, tired and resigned. "If you ever need help, Lupin, I'll be there."

Snape left, turning so that his eyes met one more time with Remus'. The tawny haired man felt a ghost of a smile float up on his lips. _Thank you,_ he thought. Snape was one of the best friends he would ever have, all the cold words and insults looked past. His hand, now healed, felt strangely tender and vulnerable in the aftermath of torture.

As soon as they were alone Remus felt himself pressed up against the nearest wall. He was too tired to retaliate as he felt Sirius lean in close to his face. Their breaths mingled, and Remus could practically taste the cool, almost mint-like flavor of Sirius' lips. He shook his head blearily to clear his thoughts.

"Don't you ever do that to me again," Sirius whispered, his hands closed around Remus' shoulders almost painfully. The great rationality he had fled from him. He could have lost Remus. "Did you know how worried I was? You didn't even wake me up." There was no malice in his voice. Sirius felt just as exhausted himself… much too tired to be angry. Softly, he bent and laid his head on the slender shoulder under his overlarge robes. The warm from the smaller body, combined with the intoxicating scent permeating with the rise and fall of Remus' chest, made Sirius half close his eyes.

"I kept on thinking… what if I lost you? What if you with your stubborn… stubborn attitude annoyed him so much that he got angry? And I wasn't there." Sirius' hands slipped down from Remus' arms to circle his waist. A sound that resembled a forced chuckle escaped his lips. "Merlin… I don't want to lose you that way. So promise me, you'll let me take care of you."

Remus licked his dry lips. "P- Si-" He swallowed. All the names he would've once called Sirius sounded wrong on his tongue. "We have to go."

As he tried to push the larger man away with his good hand, Remus remembered. Sirius had given him a direct order. And he didn't even feel the slightest twitch to obey. Sirius blinked, as if taken aback. He took several seconds to stare at the smaller man, before replying.

"You're doing it again," he said, voice hoarse. "You're just not letting me in. Moony, trust me! I- I'm- All I want is for you to be safe. I love you."

Firmly, Remus lifted Sirius' body an inch away from his own before slipping out of the suffocating embrace. His eyes felt hot again, and he quickly stepped away from the other man. Alright, it was going to hurt… but some things needed to be said. Back to the other werewolf, Remus spoke, voice soft in the dim corridor. "If that's still the way you show love, Sirius, I'd… rather you don't."

"Moony!" Sirius snarled, darting forward and grabbing Remus' wrist, turning the smaller man towards him. Hazel eyes widened for a split second, gold flashed in them before long lashes closed overtop. Remus swallowed hard before looking back at him. Sirius gritted his teeth. "Why- why did you come if you weren't going to give me a chance? Do you like torturing me? Is that it?"

"_Padfoot_!" Remus shot back. Anger bled from his haunting, brilliant eyes. "You have no idea why I came. Merlin, you're such an _idiot_! I didn't come because of these seven years you spent killing people and helping an evil bastard take over the world! I didn't come because you moped and made everyone an enemy!" He paused, gasping for breath. "I came because…" he swallowed with difficulty. "Because of the seven years before that. The seven years when… when you were the one-"

Remus broke off angrily. "Don't think these last seven years meant anything to me. You suffered, yes, but so did I. Did you think you were more of a victim? Going around killing your old friends and turning against your old mentors showed that all too clearly, didn't it? And Merlin, don't think I came back with you because of all your underhandedness, all the lies and even this damned mating bond."

"Then why? Why did you come?"

"I don't know," Remus said simply. Sirius held his gaze for another second, before roughly breaking away. An empty feeling overcame him. Who was he to question Sirius? Had he not done the same? Sirius used his wand, while he used his good people skills and clever words. Still... they've both killed, made orphans... widows... _I'm such a hypocrite,_ Remus thought miserably. _Blaming Padfoot for something like this..._ But something still felt wrong. It wasn't supposed to be like this... their love... it had never felt this twisted... one sided.

As Sirius began walking away, Remus spoke up again. "Padfoot- I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." He grabbed Sirius' hand. "We grew up, that's all, and I know war does this to people, I know. It's the same with me."

It was a while before Sirius trusted himself to speak. "No, you're perfectly right, Moony, you don't know how right you are. The first thought I had when you were gone was… _who can I kill to keep Moony safe._ And you, you're the exact same person I fell in love with in Hogwarts. I'm not."

Remus shook his head, but Sirius cut him off before any words of protest were spoken. "So right now, I'm reformulating my plan. I'll definitely make you fall in love with me again." A smirk lifted his face. "Just wait for it, Moony, I've never been this confident about anything in my life."

Blinking, Remus could tell that Sirius was lying. There was a certain way he dropped his gaze just slightly, and the way he reached up and grabbed the smaller man's wrist instead. The doubt must've shown clearly on his face because Sirius suddenly pulled him up into a heated kiss.

There was no question in Remus' heart of what he wanted to do. It felt wonderfully warm, as if he was drowning in the one best emotion in the world. His face felt hot as he gently kissed back. There was no tongue involved, just soft lips tenderly rolling over his own. But there was also a strange ache in his chest, and Remus reached up, hand gently closing on Sirius' face.

He slanted his head slightly before pushing his mate away. Sirius looked confused for a moment, eyes locked with Remus'.

"I do love you, you know?" Remus whispered, their breaths close together. "All I want is to stay with you… but that's why Ifeel that... I haveto leave. If this goes wrong somehow… my most precious dream would be shattered. And I would really die. I would definitely die." That dream he had kept close to his heart ever since Hogwarts, hidden deep under all his reasoning and loyalties. He had dreamed and remembered with every ounce of his being, and in the end, the only reason he got up in the morning was because after his work, he could sit in a quiet spot to lose himself in the memory of Sirius' voice... his smile... his warmth...

And this… would kill him. Remus was sure of it.

"So you'd rather have your dreams and not give me the chance? Moony, that's not fair," Sirius whispered back. "Why not?"

"My dreams I can protect, but this... I can't. I can't do anything except be tugged along by you and my own emotions."

"But you came," Sirius protested. "You came back with me, you did give us a chance. You'll stay with me, right?" When Remus didn't answer, he sighed. "Actually, don't answer that. I do understand you, Moony. You're going to run the moment I let go. And you'll fight the moment I push to hard."

_So I'll just have to hold on to what I have right now. That's good enough… Merlin… that'll have to be enough. Moony's right about one thing… if this doesn't work out… it'll kill me._

* * *

"James, where's Remus? I thought you said you'd bring him home if you saved him." 

James waved off the question tiredly. "We found him around where Harry said they'd be. But he's still with Sirius."

"WHAT?" Lily leaped down the four stair cases to their front door, grabbing James by the shoulders. "They weren't stronger than you. I know that. Why- why didn't you save him?"

"Lily-" James began. "I couldn't, I mean- they- Remus and Sirius loved each other. You didn't see how upset Remus was after he left. He just couldn't stop crying, but he said he didn't want to go with Sirius."

Lily was looking at him with the most peculiar expression, somewhere between pity and anguish. "James, you left him, didn't you? You just left him with Sirius."

James shook his head. "I'm so sorry, but it was Sirius too. He was the exact same boy as in Hogwarts. He hasn't changed, through all of the Death Eater missions, he- he still loves Remus. Lily, I couldn't tear them apart."

"The Sirius from school…" Lily said faintly. "James, the Sirius from school did something that should never be forgiven."

"Forgiven? Lily, what are you talking about?"

"James," there was a soft plea in Lily's voice. She looked away and closed her eyes. "I was looking through some of the Ministry's older files today, trying to get some order in the record library, and I was just thought I'd like to find out… why Sirius Black went to the dark side. And… I did."

"You did?" James asked, with a calmness he did not feel. "Lily, I've been trying to find out what happened for years! Nobody would say a thing. Lily, what happened?"

"Sirius-" Lily swallowed hard. "There was a criminal record for Sirius Black, a large one… he was sent to Azkaban for that prank you two pulled in sixth year on Severus. He was accused of threatening, disobeying restraining orders… and James… it said he raped Remus in seventh year."

"What…" James' whispered. "What- that's- that's not possible. Lily, there has to be some sort of mistake. I can understand the other charges… but Sirius would never have done that."

"I don't know, James, how well did you really know your best friend?" Lily asked softly. "The Ministry wouldn't lie about something this big… James, have you thought clearly? Thought that- maybe- you just left Remus with a Death Eater and a wanted criminal?"

James shook his head in disbelief. "Lily- no- I… no. I looked in Sirius' eyes today, and I swear on my life they weren't the eyes of a guilty man. I believe him with all my heart when he says that he will never hurt Remus."

"Daddy?" A voice from the other end of the room piped up. "Who's going to hurt Remus?"

"Harry, sorry baby, but we're just discussing something about work. Why don't you go grab a chocolate frog from the kitchen?" Lily turned, giving the boy the most reassuring smile she could call up.

The black haired boy stared back at them, eyes troubled. "You don't trust me, Mommy? I love Remus too, this isn't fair. Why can't I know?"

"Harry," James brushed by Lily to his son. "Even if someone hurts me, I'd want you to stay safe. It's the same with Remus, and not knowing is the best way to keep you safe for now."

Harry leaned into James' hug and said nothing. _But it hurts when you don't trust me, daddy._

That night, neither James nor Lily noticed the small cloaked figure pushing out the door, glancing briefly around the streets before running down the path a broken moon lit towards the dark side.

* * *

Warning: Coarse language (well... coarser language than before)

As soon as they entered the infirmary, both wizards became suddenly aware of the new crisis. "Padfoot?" Remus whispered, eyes solemn. "Where's Draco?"

Sirius sucked in a breath. "Moony… I wasn't looking, but- did you see… if there were mirrors in Voldemort's room?"

Wordlessly, Remus nodded.

"Shit!" Sirius burst out. "That bloody- damn it! Merlin- arrgh!" He grabbed Remus' robe sleeve. "Come on, we're going back. That bloody idiot- idiot- damned _brat_! I can't believe-"

For once, Remus allowed himself to be dragged willingly from the room. In the misty half-dark, Narcissa sat up, eyes wide. Her lips parted briefly, and her eyes were troubled. "My son…"

* * *

M-rated Scene for Violence and Torture (not of the sexual kind), please refrain from reading if you are easily disturbed

"Well, so the Malfoy brat has long ears," Voldemort hissed. Angry red eyes fixed themselves on the small figure huddled against the ground, covered with broken glass. Terrified gray eyes glanced briefly up at him, before Draco winced in pain and lowered his gaze.

He didn't even realize how it had happened… there were broken bits of the mirror on the ground, long jagged cuts at his shoulders and thighs from the mirror walls. A dozen mirror shards were buried into the side of his face and down to his hands.

And the Dark Lord was even more intimidating than his father's worse stories. There was a deep pressure in the air, and Draco couldn't breath. Couldn't move… A lump rose within his throat that he couldn't swallow.

"So you saw everything, child…" Voldemort came around his table, one hand dragging along its edge. He looked even larger standing up. Draco's breath hitched, a slightly strangled sound escaping his throat. "What did you think."

"I- I didn't mean anything-" Draco blurted. "I just wanted to see-" Voldemort did not move, but a force shoved Draco down against the glass covered floor. A searing pain shot up his arm as glass broke his skin and Draco could feel the cold surface of the glass inside him, grinding against uninjured flesh.

"_Crucio_," Voldemort's cold voice cut like a dagger through Draco's chest. He was suddenly in too much pain to scream. He couldn't breath! Whenever he drew in a breath, it was like stabbing himself. Draco rolled slightly, away from the glass, but the pain only grew more intense. His entire body was encased in flame… Merlin… Merlin!

A strangled scream burst past his lips.

"We can't let him go, my Lord, the boy's heard too much," Crouch piped up helpfully.

Nobody, not even Voldemort himself, expected the Dark Lord's next move. Abruptly, the dark haired man had turned, a half-crazed snarl painted across his face. Crouch's shoulders bent back, breaking, before the sound of flesh tearing could be heard.

The hoarse scream echoed through the room before Crouch collapsed to his knees, eyes wide and panting. Whatever Draco might've said died against his lips. He blinked through the hazy veil of agony at the other tortured man.

"My Lord…" Crouch whispered, finally understanding. "You… you doubt me? You want to kill me?"

Voldemort said nothing. He needed to kill something. That smoldering… growing anger inside him. He needed to hurt someone. Anything was fine. He couldn't think, and he felt trapped within his own skin. Eyes glowing blood-red, his gaze was fixed on Crouch. The man annoyed him very much.

_Crucio_ wasn't enough. Within moments, Crouch's body was a mess of flesh and blood on the carpet. Broken fingers bent at an odd angle to his hands, and one leg laid only half attached to the rest of the body. A harsh scream echoed through the room. Draco stared in utter horror as blood sprayed towards him. The salty smell lunged against his nose and he cringed as the blood dotted his face.

A wide, unrestrained smile floated up Voldemort's face. _More… I need more…_ Crouch's bloodshot eyes stared up at Voldemort in disbelief. He sank down, laid on his stomach as his last good arm snapped cleanly in half. He screamed again as his chest collapsed inward, lungs shrinking, impaled against his ribs.

"My Lord…" Crouch choked. He was surely dead… so much of his body laid in a growing pool of red, unrecognizable mess. "Please… stop."

Voldemort stopped when Crouch lunged forward, hand gripping dark robes. Bloody prints pressed against his hems. "Please… my Lord… I- I'm not a spy!"

Burying his face against Voldemort's robes, the dying man drew in a tortured breath before looking up, pain floating before his eyes. "I'm not a spy… I'd never betray you…"

"All I ever wanted was to be your strength, my Lord," Crouch wept brokenly. "I just- I would've… died to have you- smile at me like you do Black… or Malfoy… When you need to do something… I wanted to be the one you called- my Lord…"

"You lie," Voldemort said softly, but the red mist before his eyes was gone. His hands slowly dropped down to his side. What in the world was he doing?

"I don't! You saved me, my Lord." Crouch sobbed, coughing up blood. He blinked again through bloody eyelids and looked up. Eyes impossibly clear. "I was nothing- be… before you. My life is yours. Kill me, torture me… but this… I can't stand this… you thinking I betrayed you. Never… I wouldn't…"

Voldemort's face was emotionless. There was nothing in those dark eyes. Crouch lowered his gaze, and the muscles in his broken face tightened. A single tear slipped down his face.

"I'm dying… m… Lord…" he whispered. "I would've… followed you to the end of the world… I'm glad… you were the one to kill me…" His lips slowly twitched upward into a small smile. "If you… believe in… reincarnation… my Lord… will you… let me serve you… in my next life?"

Voldemort's mouth opened, but Crouch's hand went limp, tightening briefly before dropping away. An eerie rattle escaped blood covered, split lips. The man died without ever hearing Voldemort's answer.

"Aha… haha… ha…" Voldemort stumbled backwards, collapsing into his chair. _I don't have an answer._ He didn't have an answer for the dead man. He wasn't sure if it made him feel better or worst.

All that remained of Crouch was a few pieces of limbs blending into the dark crimson walls of the study… and that smile… the peaceful, satisfied smile that hung by the face disfigured with open flesh. Voldemort buried his face between his palms. Wrong. What was wrong with him? Had the werewolf gotten on his nerves so badly that he'd lost his mind?

"His own fault," he murmured to himself. "Nobody's _that _loyal to me… They're not supposed to be. What was he thinking…"

End M-rated Scene

* * *

A minute later, Voldemort finally became aware of another's gaze on him. He looked up to meet a pair of dull gray eyes. Sometime during Crouch's death, _Crucio_ had fallen away, and Draco now laid in a hazy world of pain, staring at Voldemort. Wide, young eyes filled with fear and condemnation. Almost... _accusing_. 

"You-" Voldemort snarled at the helpless figure on the floor. "Do you want to live, brat?"

Draco didn't answer, only stared at the Dark Lord with the same dull, dead eyes. _Someone… help…_ A sob built up within his chest, but he couldn't muster up enough energy to cry. _Father… mother…_ Images of his parents floated before him, briefly overlapping with Voldemort's form. _Help me… father…_

"Talk!" He was suddenly thrown into the far wall, Voldemort once again bristling with anger. Draco opened his mouth to talk, but resigned and allowed himself to slip slowly back into the carpet.

"One whisper of what happened in here gets out," Voldemort said quietly. "And there will be nothing left of you that's recognizable. And trust me, I'll make it _slow_."

Draco closed his eyes. He was tired. So tired… Sweat had coated his face, and the slow seep of blood from his cut felt… faraway. The last time he felt like this was when he caught a fever, kept in bed for over a week.

He couldn't move a muscle if he tried. Who was he fooling? His parents probably didn't notice he was gone. Nobody was going to help him… nobody…

"If asked," Voldemort continued slowly. "You will tell them, boy, that Bartemius Crouch admitted to being a spy, tried to attack me, so I disposed of him. Can you handle that, boy? If not, I'd be forced to kill you on the spot."

The Voldemort expected Draco to answer, he was disappointed. The boy tried to lift his head, but couldn't as his neck gave way and he slumped forwards. The carpet was soft… foul smelling, but soft…

Another face floated up before him. Younger than his parents, with a gentle smile that lit up bright golden eyes… _'You're a good kid, Draco, never doubt that…'_

Suddenly, Draco was aware of arms beneath him, lifting him upwards into a solid, clean-smelling embrace. It didn't smell like blood… dear Merlin... what was it?

"…foy," an insistent voice was by his ear. Draco felt his cheeks tapped. "Malfoy, wake up, brat."

He opened his eyes a slit, and saw a familiar, hard-set face. Piercing gray eyes flickered over his face critically, and for a moment, Draco was delusional enough to think that it was his father.

But then memory set in, and Draco blinked slowly. _Black…_

"This is why I don't like kids," Sirius said, but there was no anger in that voice. "You're strong, right? Hang in there for a moment."

Draco felt as if he needed to say something. His split lips twitched, and his voice came out in a small, hoarse whisper. "Remus… Lupin was strong…"

Gray eyes softened, and Draco felt himself slowly righted. Pain shot up both arms, but he no longer felt quite as miserable. "Yeah," Sirius replied. "He was."

"Moony, you take him back to the infirmary. I've got to talk to someone." Draco felt himself carefully lifted upright and another set of hands grabbed his uninjured shoulder to keep him from falling. He turned to see a pair of concerned golden eyes close to his face. A gentle hand reached up and pushed his bangs back from his face, so they were no longer irritating his wounds.

"Draco," Remus smiled slightly. "Lean against me, alright? Do you think you can walk?"

"… I'm not a baby…" Draco gritted his teeth slightly. However, he didn't protest as his hands were guided across Remus' neck and he was lifted onto the werewolf's back. His face pressed against the back of a warm shoulder, and Draco could feel the first of the tears coming.

Sirius watched, making sure Remus and Draco were out of the room before turning to the man brooding behind the desk. Voldemort had remained silent since they had entered the room, cunning red eyes fixed on them.

"You used Crucio on a child," Sirius said quietly, planting both hands on Voldemort's desk. It wasn't a question.

The Dark Lord made no reply, and the two men merely looked quietly at each other. Sirius felt his blood begin to boil again.

"And you killed Crouch," he whispered. "Congratulations, my Lord. You've just managed to push away your three biggest allies in one afternoon. You better hope Malfoy doesn't find out about this. He is loyal to you, but don't ever underestimate the love a man can have for his children."

"Worry about your own skin first, Sirius," Voldemort replied, voice equally soft.

Sirius choked down his anger and shrugged. "Just a bit of advice, my Lord. You were an admirable man, so keep a lid on your obsession with torture. Do it before you lose anyone else that trusted you."

* * *

Author's Note: 

Surprise! I'm back. I'm so sorry! I have no excuse, except my marks were dropping quite alarmingly and I wasn't going to get into university at that rate, so I just had to take a break from writing and actually study. Good thing is, I think I'm alright now. It all depends on my final marks and stuff. Well… I've tried my best.

And don't kill me for the many torture scenes in here either… hides behind door.

I thought this chapter was long and tedious, and a pain to write. I couldn't proofread the thing without getting bored, so I apologize if any of you lose interest or if there are too many mistakes. My mind's mush after exams and everything… blame it on that. Next chapter should be better, with more action, and Harry shows up, and yeah…

Gah! I hate myself! I'd actually made Remus annoying, haven't I. That wasn't what I meant to do… I just couldn't seem to make him keep that emotional tension and everything. I'm so sorry, I'll try harder. And Sirius too! I really don't know how to change it! Last chapter, I had set them up to almost be together again, and that was too soon! I meant to drag it out a bit longer, but because of that, this next bit was really hard to work with. I mean, you can't _backtrack _on emotions, can you?

Erm… good news is, I'll probably be updating a little more regularly now. Sorry for all that wait, and hopefully, I haven't lost all my readers…

Oh yeah… I hope you guys felt at least a little sorry for Crouch… I felt sorry for him, although he's that cruel, evil, sadistic bastard that likes to inflict pain and stuff…

The Demonic Duo: Well, I sure took my time on this one, right? Don't anybody kill me.(checks my hiding spot)Thanks so much for reviewing!

Shinigami: Ah… I hadn't thought of that… but really, Sirius likes muggles, and likes their things. So it's not a very big stretch to think that maybe he'd be more tolerant of bibles and muggle religions, right? And what Peter had was a fume, then James and Sirius refined it until it could last for a lot longer, up to a few months, I should think. And maybe it works weird on house elves, right?

FlamencoPenguin: Sweet characters… bah. Give me blood and gore any day. No I'm just joking! Please, sobs no! I repent, take the blood and gore away! Aha… I'm insane, I really am. Nope, nobody raped Remus (knocks over head… except for chappie 2) And of course Sirius is a twat, otherwise they wouldn't have this problem, would they? (ohohohoho…ß evil laughter) Some of their conversations were actually real problems I've wondered about… so… yeah. Oh whoops… I think my automatic spell check changed that for me, and I didn't pick it up while proofreading. (embarrassed laughter)

RasAlhague: Obsidian Rhapsody! I love that story! I thought it was dark and so happy at the same time. Does that make any sense at all? Terrible suspense indeed. Not really, you all know I'm not going to let them die, or give them an unhappy ending!  
Part of the reason I waited so long was to lure out my loyal (rabid) fan base (stalkers)… JK JK, not at all . It's a good thing I don't have rabid stalkers, ne? Or I'd be in quite a bit of trouble.

Emma Lupin: Sorry you had to wait even longer for this chappie -'… Sirius well… Sirius is a little weird. He won't be mad at Draco because… well… Draco's a kid. He won't REALLY be mad at something like that. Weird things set him off.

Seeneha: Wow… my most sophisticated reviewer ever! Impeccable grammar? My English teacher would faint if she heard you say that, she complains about my grammar every essay. I don't know about smooth flowing or heart wrenching or good vocab. But I love your review! It makes me feel so proper! Sorry to make you wait so long. And one of my greatest joys in writing is to bring out something likeable in everyone. Thank you!

Amaroq: Happy happy. No more cliffhangers in this chapter. And yes I like torturing Sirius… just so when I give him a happy ending, it seems THAT much happier. Yes, of course Moony really DOES love Padfoot. Did you ever doubt it? .. I know I'm sometimes a little critical of my own work… but it's just that when I compare it to other people's… it's just so inferior… so infuriating… sobs.

YamikiofAnime: OMG? (goes to check my answer for your previous review, and matching it up with your answer to my answer for you previous… I'm lost and confused now) But anyway! I'm so glad you reviewed! You're the first person I've met who can explode so many times and still be such a fantastic reviewer! I don't know… how are you able to pull yourself together? Oo pun.

OrA-ShiNi-gi: Thank you! I'm glad you understood kreacher's bible part. Oo! You know what? My automatic spell check just changed kreacher into preacher. How ironic… I thought it was kinda funny… and I'm glad you enjoyed it.

MY MInD: aww… (offers coffee) Quotes Emi: "Do you want a massage?" What do you mean no more scary violence from Sirius. (checks) Oops… sorry… he's kinda violent in this chapter. Not to Remus tho! It's ok if it's not to Remus, right? Right?

Emi: EmiEmiEmiEmi! Yes the hospital was just as horrible as I feared. But I got all my studying done grins You'd be about finished your test, right? Whew. I thought of going to your university… but that's too far away and stuff. So come to mine! PLEASE? (makes puppy faces)  
Genius… Mikril-wrin calls me a genius… I know I've died and gone to heaven now.  
Break? Where where? Where is the forgotten break? cries But you could still understand it, right? Heh… spell-throwing marathon. I'll throw that in somewhere too, it sounds interesting .  
Well, you'll notice the same ending abruptly thing happening here, but I tried to do what you said… it didn't work TOO TOO well, but ah well, better than nothing right? Slightly selfish love… I think you may be right. I'll try that starting next chapter, cuz I couldn't really in this one, too much going on and stuff.

RoschLupin-Black: No, nobody's dead. Nobody's dead… except that unnamed young auror and Crouch… but that's not too bad, is it? I'm glad I cleared that up with the timeline. I know a lot of things happened during their Hogwarts years that was never specified or anything, but mainly, I think the general idea that they were happy before, and something went wrong, and now Remmie doesn't trust Siri and etc, would be enough to kinda understand what's going on and stuff.

RedT: Stunned? Is that a good thing or bad thing? Ehehe… Thank you so much, I thought it wasn't very original, but I guess… nervous laughter Well, here's the next installment (ooo… that's a word I don't use very often, must use it more often. "installment… installment…")

Apus-Equuleus: sobs My muse abandoned me for this part. I swear! The homework was only part of the excuse! I couldn't touch this chapter at all! Cliffies kinda lose effect after a couple months, don't they… So really… that one wasn't that effective at all… Well… to tell you the truth, I'm a little stumped about both main characters now. You know how in the last chapter, Remmie kinda reached out to Sirius? Well… that was maybe not the best thing to do, cuz I still want to continue with the fact that they still aren't OK yet… Ahhhh… I am a failure as a writer for not thinking ahead…  
Yeah, I'd always thought Sirius was a little darkish, even if most of that is meant in jest. And I am really sure that he grew up with a dark family even in the cannon version and stuff. He's always been one to defy norms.  
And the infamous motorbike! It has a nice little niche in my story later on! And yeah… I know I need to re-establish the atmosphere around Sirius and Remus. They were slipping a lot during this chapter.  
Hm… and I was introducing a sort of manipulative streak to Remus too. That's what struck me the most about Remus from the books. He really had a way with words! I mean - "Your parents gave their lives to keep you alive, Harry. A poor way to repay them - gambling their sacrifice for a bag of magic tricks." I fell in love with Remus right there. And he was a good teacher not only because he was a good wizard, but he knew perfectly well how to handle people, and still always give off that serene, calm feel. Well… that's the Remus I know. .  
Thank you so much for your wonderful and long review, as usual. (gives invisible trophy with Sirius and Remus stickers on it)

Nightmare-chan22: Poor Sirius, eh? Well… unfortunately, this chapter was a step outside their romance story, into the bigger world. I felt really uncomfortable too, but it had to be done and stuff. Sorry if it was disappointing at all. Er… I'm not sure if I kept up the good work, but I guess I'll know from the reviews I get (or lack thereof) .

Hannio: Er… well… to let you out on a secret, I really didn't plan on the Avada Kedavra part… It just sort of happened as I finished up that chapter. Kinda like- oh yeah, that may work… -,-' Yup, of course James and Sirius would never _truly_ hate each other, I never got that impression anyway. They were just too close.

EsScaper: Thank you so much for reviewing every single chapter. I'm so touched! Well… it did miss them. Ehehe… but this chapter was nowhere as touching or anything… The next really touching part won't be until… I think in another two chapters. I'm glad you liked it that they resurrected their friendship… and it wasn't THAT much of a miracle, was it? Yup, I'll have a flashback of Sirius' turning dark thingy.

Clear Venom: Well… it's not a cliffy this time. I hope I've somewhat maintained the quality, despite everything. (Are you checkmarks? The name changed halfway and now I'm just very CONFUSED)

Checkmarks: If you're not Clear Venom... well... I'll copy and paste the lines from above... So sorry (cries)

Tiffany: Sirius knows about the incident, but it's kinda fuzzy for him, and he doesn't really think about it. James doesn't know what happened that Christmas night at all, as you can see from this chappie. lol

Jackster222: Sorry for the wait. I um… actually have an authentic excuse this time.

Noelle: Don't kill me! (goes into corner and cries) Yes, I'm going to update it, and no, I won't give it up, it just might be a little slow, cuz I'm trying my best to improve in school, so I get into university… (shouldn't everyone in the world get in? it's unfair…) Thanx so much!

Forestofgreenjello: Love your name . And of course you can borrow my lines! I'm ecstatic that you'd want to. Go ahead! Go go go! That is, if you haven't started your fic already, I wouldn't want you to change it and stuff. About the other line, well, I'm going to come back to that at a later chapter, it's important to plot . So thanks Sapphire, strange that your names would be different, but who could resist a forest of green jello?

The flame alchemist: Roy Mustang! Yes. Can I get your autograph Mr. Mustang? Thanx for reviewing! And hopefully you like this chapter too.

Next Chapter: The Clear-cloaked Champion


	7. The Clear cloaked Champion

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: R, non-con situations, no lemon

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, minor deaths, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, adventure

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 7: The Clear-cloaked Champion

Midnight passed quietly, and in the light of the early dawn, all their glooms and worries seemed oddly out of place.

Narcissa emerged from the back room, slowly closing the door behind her. Remus was on his feet and beside her in a flash. Soft hazel eyes were dark and concerned as they trained themselves on a pale, perfectly beautiful face beneath golden curls.

"How is he?" Remus asked quietly, nodding his head towards the back door. Narcissa turned to him for a moment, eyes blank. Remus held her gaze, lips pressed in a tight white line.

"Get away from me," she said tiredly. "I'm having a bad week. My wonderful little house is infested with Dumbledore's wizards, I've ridden on a broom with two raving maniacs, my son was tortured and now won't talk to me. I don't need to add contact with a werewolf to the list."

Which, Remus guessed, was her way of saying '_Draco's awake, but he won't talk._' He nodded gratefully before venturing into the back room. Narcissa watched him, back stiff and eyes hard. As soon as the door clicked shut again, she turned to the other man seated on the hospital beds.

"He hurt my child," she whispered. "He won't talk. He told me to go away. And I… I can't tell. Black, what did our Lord do to Draco?"

"Crucio, that's all," Sirius replied. "But he also dissembled Crouch in front of him. I'm not an expert on a child's mind, but he's in pretty bad shape right now." He paused. "Are you going to tell Malfoy?"

Narcissa closed her eyes and didn't answer. After staring at her for a moment, Sirius stood.

"It's unsafe here. Peter can't possibly protect us. I'll see to finding a safer place in the meantime."

* * *

He met Karkaroff just as the man left his office. Their eyes met briefly, and the headmaster stopped. There was a sudden fear in his eyes. "Black, what's going on? What did our Lord say?"

"Karkaroff," Sirius paused. "I need a favor."

"Oh my dear Merlin, you made him angry again, didn't you?" Karkaroff moaned. "I swear, every single time-"

"I need a safe office at Durmstrang, where Voldemort would not find us readily. Would you be able to find that for me?"

Karkaroff paled. "That… damned, Black, if our Lord finds out about this… nothing'll save us," he whispered harshly. "You may escape with your life, Black, but I? He wouldn't even bother thinking twice."

"Which is why neither of us must tell," Sirius lowered his voice. "Karkaroff, what would you call us?"

"Not friends," Karkaroff paused. "Definitely not friends."

"I thought not, but we would be considered mutual benefactors. Karkaroff, I wouldn't do something to purposefully endanger you. If I ask this of you, it is because I believe it safe."

Karkaroff hesitated. "I trust you as far as I can throw you, Black." He left his words hanging, trying to find some measure of confidence in Sirius' even stare. "But…" he let out a nervous laugh, "with magic, I guess I can throw you pretty far."

"I was going to thank you," Sirius pondered good-naturedly, "but that comment wounded me. To think _you_ can throw me with magic? Forget gratitude."

"Don't give yourself a headache trying," Karkaroff muttered. "Come with me, I'll give you another office for Malfoy's wife and kid." It wasn't as if Black wasn't right. In the past seven years, there were numerous times when Voldemort found fault in his work, and the few time he had bent his head to ask for help, Black, despite their differences, had been the first to subtly slip in a hand.

Black can get himself killed for all Karkaroff cared, but… with such an outspoken request… and the many favors he owed, it was hard to refuse.

* * *

Infirmary Back Room

"Draco?"

The child looked surprisingly small, half curled against the bed. His arms were wrapped around himself in a protective embrace, and the face that rested against the pillow was abnormally pale. When Remus entered, silvery eyes flickered briefly in his direction before settling back to stare at empty space.

"Draco," Remus repeated. He strained his senses, trying to decipher the empty feeling in the air. The boy wasn't feeling anything. He shuddered, the chill was almost as bad as a Dementor's presence. "Do you need something?" He asked softly.

He sat himself down beside the bed and directed his gaze up at the ceiling.

"I hate you," Draco whispered. Remus blinked in surprise. Whatever he'd expected to hear from the child, that wasn't it. He stared openly at the small back, before sighing and looking upwards again.

"Is that so… do you want to talk about it?"

"And Black," Draco forced out. "I hate both of you." His fingers grew paler as he tightened his grip on the hospital sheets. "I don't understand, why'd it have to be you? Of all people?"

Carefully, Remus placed a hand on the bed. "What do you mean?"

"It had to be you and Black, of all people," Draco ground his teeth together. "The one relative that hates me the most and you, who I haven't even met for a week."

"If… if someone saved me… I wanted it to be mother," Draco choked. Sitting up abruptly, he glared at the werewolf. "She knew where I was! She told me she overheard you! So…" His eyes were desperate. "Why didn't she come? Why didn't she even bother to come?"

Remus felt the emptiness radiating off the boy like a physical blow. He had no answers. Watching the dry-eyed boy trying to control his own despair, he cursed himself. _All those verbal matches you've won,_ Remus berated, _where are they? Even Albus said you were good with your tongue… _so why… why couldn't he think of anything to say to ease this child's pain?

"And I- I didn't even expect her to come," Draco swallowed with difficulty, gaze dropping downwards. "Her or father. Back in… there… I wanted father to help me, he was the first one I thought of… but he's not here. He's never here." A shaky, forced smile stretched across his face.

"I'm stupid aren't I?" Draco laughed. Only, it was the most twisted, painful laugh Remus had ever heard. Coming from a child, it was even worse. "Stupid… for thinking father and mother would even care… even if he was here."

"Draco…"

"Why?" Draco whispered, sinking back down into the pillow. "Why didn't she come for me? Mother… Was I not even… worth the time?"

"That's not it," Remus said softly. Carefully, he let his hand envelop the boy's smaller ones, prying them loose from the hospital sheets. How… how could he explain something he didn't understand himself? "But… With Sirius rushing off to play hero, she could do nothing, right?"

"She loves her clothes and her parties," Draco rolled so that he was facing Remus, eyes solemn. "If… someone was going to burn her dresses, she would've gone to save them."

Perhaps humor was the best path to take. "Well, knowing your mother," Remus smiled weakly, "she's probably only _capable_ of saving clothes. For someone important like you, better leave it to your uncle."

There was no smile on the boy's face. His eyes didn't even flicker. Inwardly, Remus wanted to hit himself. _Couldn't you have come up with anything better?_

Silence settled uncomfortably between them. Remus felt trapped. He needed to help this child. He had failed so many people in his life, he can't let this happen!

He failed his parents. They had always wanted an upright, proper wizard… he just had to take a stroll at night and be turned into a monster. He wasn't able to be there for Peter when the other boy needed it the most, instead drowning himself so completely in his own misery that he never noticed. He couldn't save Sirius from his family, couldn't take away eleven years of loneliness and maddening silence. He wasn't able to resist his own emotions, dragging Sirius along with him into a spiraling, endless cycle of suffering.

If only he hadn't fallen in love, Sirius wouldn't have become a werewolf, wouldn't have to live through the same disdain and helplessness. Hadn't he always been the manipulative one? If he was so good at this, he should've foreseen all the outcomes, right? He should've known that their affections would destroy both of them. Death Eater… werewolf… rapist… traitor… it was his fault Sirius turned.

If he truly loved Sirius, why had he started their relationship? It never brought the man anything but suffering. He should've stayed away, since back in second year. Sirius had James and the others to bring him out of the darkness. Being associated with Remus only thrust him back in.

He should've known better.

So many unhappy faces, tears, harsh words he had caused. Remus felt his own eyes glistening over.

"Draco please," he begged, "talk to me. Tell me to go away, anything. I hate this darkness you're feeling. I can get anyone, do you want to talk to someone else? You have to talk."

"No, don't go," Draco rasped, alarmed. "I… I don't want… you to go. You came didn't you? You came to help me. And Black too. You came when they didn't! I just-" his voice broke. "I just… want to know why?"

Under the circumstances, Remus' logical reasoning of _because we couldn't let a child die_, was probably unwise. Draco's eyes were angry, searching his for some desperate, more illogical answer.

"I don't know about your uncle," Remus' voice was barely above a whisper. _Sorry,_ he thought to Narcissa, _but I mean this and your child needs this. And this time… for this one, illogical moment…I don't care about the consequences._ "But for me, I want you to come live with me, if you don't mind my werewolf blood… I'll teach you how to fly… manners, for one… give you anything a child should get… and… and when Hogwarts rolls by, I'll make sure that you get homesick."

The small hands around his tightened, and Remus plunged ahead. "You have a father, Draco, one that loves you very, very much, but… if you want… I can be another. Can… can you live… with that?"

At that, Draco gave up his strangle-hold on the bloody memories, harsh words and empty rooms. The air flooded with anguish, hitting Remus like a sudden blast of heat. The werewolf stumbled backwards.

"Live with that…" Draco forced out. He was hanging onto the older man's hand like a lifeline. "I think… yeah… I can…" For the first time since Remus met the boy, the floodgates opened and he began to cry.

Remus, swallowing hard, wrapped his other arm around the child, and quietly willed his own tears to go away.

After a long while, Draco suddenly looked up, eyes a little clearer. "Father, Lupin? I think you meant mother."

* * *

A Dark City Street

Harry was hopelessly lost. He had heard heroic tales of his father running away numerous times when he was young. Now, eyeing the dim signs, lit by the lazily rising sun, he began to doubt.

At first Harry thought he knew where he was going. A practiced circling had to happen before he could leave the hideout. From there, it was an easy trek through a quiet neighborhood with a single large street. But then, the one large street became two, then six, then Harry didn't want to count anymore. He had left the neighborhood. Colorful storefronts and offices sprinkled between several large, towering buildings, each looking exactly alike to one before it.

"Daddy you liar," Harry sighed. "No way you walked all the way to France. Or China either."

Then he remembered Remus' stories of his childhood. They were probably truer stories than his father's anyway. After a particularly nasty fight between his parents, Remus said he had ran away from home, only to find himself chased by a couple dogs who disliked his wolf scent.

"The Knight Bus," Harry said out loud. "Remus said he was saved by the Knight Bus."

As if on cue, a roar sounded behind him, increasing alarmingly fast. Harry swerved around in time to see two blinding dots approach him in the early morning mist. Letting out a sharp gasp, Harry stumbled backwards, tripping over the edge of the sidewalk. The din grew louder, blocking out every trace of the dawn silence. Pain coursed up his spine as Harry landed hard in the gutter.

BANG! The large monster barreled past him, missing his head by inches. Harry felt a harsh breath of air blast through his hair and coughed slightly, too shocked to realize what happened. Upside down, he saw letters slowly shift in a golden haze down the windows of the large vehicle.

_The Knight Bus_. Harry couldn't help the near-hysterical smile that crept up his face. His heart was still pounding hard.

The doors swung open above his head, and Harry had to roll to the side to avoid being stepped on by the heeled foot that came off the bus.

"Here you are ma'am, hope you find what you're looking for," a loud voice rang from the inside of the bus. Harry leaped to his feet, brushing by the tall, dark haired woman, scrambling onto the bus as the doors began to close.

A conductor dressed in a purple uniform noticed him as the doors finally closed.

"Who're you?" he asked dubiously, looking at Harry's jeans, one leg of which had a nasty stain at the end.

"Harry," Harry replied. "You're the Knight Bus, right?"

"I'm askin' the questions 'ere," the conductor narrowed his eyes. "Choo a bit young to be flaggin' the bus?"

"I want to go to Durmstrang," Harry told him. After a night of laughing at his expense, his parents had finally told him what the school was really called. "I've got money, how much is it?"

"Firteen Sickles," the conductor frowned. "But yer a bit young-"

"Harry!" The bus door had opened again, and the woman who had gotten off earlier was posed at the entrance. "You got on without me. You know they won't trust what you tell them." She turned her sharp gaze to the conductor. "The boy's with me, we're going to Durmstrang."

"Ah, yes ma'am," the conductor bowed quickly. "Er… the boy'll need his fare." Impatiently, the woman shoved him some silver that appeared out of her impossibly small purse. Briefly, Harry wondered at the woman's bad mood, but before he could comment, the bus had started again.

"Who're you?" Harry whispered urgently. "Why did you help me? Weren't you getting off?"

The woman smiled, and her heavy-lidded eyes flickered with a wave of intense arrogance. She sat herself down on one of the brass beds and motioned Harry to do the same. "Had something better to do. You're Harry Potter, aren't you?"

Harry cocked his head. "I'm famous? I didn't know that."

"How adorably stupid kids are," the woman laughed. "It's your dad that's famous. Everyone knows what James Potter looks like, and I swear, you look just like him."

"But who _are_ you?" Harry asked again. He was feeling more nervous by the second. This pretty woman, slightly older than his own mother, exuded a sense of confidence, yet… twisted… if the wry smile that hung on her lips were any indication.

"Someone on your side, Harry, if you want to go to Durmstrang," she said simply, before looking out the window.

Harry swallowed hard. His hands fisted in the bed sheets under him. Having walked the entire night, the bed, although not as soft as his own, felt extremely welcoming.

He didn't see the smirk that hung by the woman's lips, nor the deepening of her dark gray eyes. Of course, he didn't see the writhing imprint on the woman's shoulder under black robes.

* * *

Potter Residence

"Lily! Oh Merlin, Lily! Lily!" James swung his wife around in the middle of cooking. The contents of the sauce pan, a mound of charred gooey substance that used to be an egg, spilled down her loose shorts and his shirt.

"James Potter! This is the last straw!" Lily yelped. The heat didn't reach her of course, for the high levels of protection spells she had placed on herself, but this was ridiculous. "You are the cook of the family from now on. If _this_ is how you're going to treat me when I'm making you breakfast, I am _not_ going to tolerate this kitchen nonsense for a second longer!"

"Lily!" James panted. "Harry's gone."

Lily stopped for a moment. She looked down at the mess on her clothes. Her expression grew thoughtful for a moment as she placed a finger on her chin. Her bright eyes flickered up to James' face.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear you that time, would you mind repeating yourself?" Her voice was deadly calm, with only a small crinkle at the edges of her large eyes that indicated at inner turmoil.

James took a panicked breath. "Harry's gone. I don't know where he went."

Before he could blinked, Lily had hexed him. As he felt his sticky green hair trickle down the side of his face, James looked pleadingly at his wife. "It wasn't me this time, I swear! I didn't put him up to it this time! Lily!"

"I'm going to the Headquarters," Lily said briskly, floating the dirty sauce pan into the sink before shrugging on her robes. "You, think of what you've done until the goo wears off. That boy of ours is in a lot of trouble, and so are you."

* * *

Durstrang

Severus Snape's office at Durmstrang was a small, cramped space barely enough to fit his shelves of potion supplies. Not that he spent much time there, but you'd think for all the things he was responsible for, they could've given him a room larger than a closet. Worse, there was an overly large window that covered three quarters of one wall. Snape had shoved all three of his shelves to the far end and cast numerous blocking spells on them, but a couple of his potions had still gone bad with the late afternoon heat. His request for room changes had been turned down several times. Karkaroff didn't do favors for anyone.

Except perhaps Black. _His_ office was four times the size of Snape's, equipped with its own bathroom, beautifully crafted furnitures and a large fireplace. And Black only used it to floo to his house.

Snape sighed. Just when he thought he couldn't hate the man any more than he already did…

But fate, in her usual sadistic ways, had a plan for Snape's strategically placed room. If his office wasn't facing the back of the school, and if the late morning sun wasn't quite so blinding, he would never have tried to close the blinds and witnessed the scene below.

A young boy, with features too far below to distinguish, was struggling in the grasp of a tall, dark haired woman Snape recognized too well.

Quietly, he slipped the windows open and cast a small spell to eavesdrop. There had to be something wrong if Bellatrix Lestrange was willing to touch a child. She had only agreed to Rodolphus Lestrange's proposal because he promised her they wouldn't have children.

"Let go! Let go before dad's hexes get to you! Don't say I didn't warn you!" The boy was yelling. There was a small explosion and suddenly, the tall woman's right hand, previously gripped around the boy's wrist, were transformed into the slippery tentacle of an octopus.

"I warned you," the young boy's voice sounded almost triumphant as he began running in the other direction. Bellatrix shrieked with disgust, flailing her boneless limb uselessly. "Dad casts this when I go to my aunt's. That's why Dudley's scared of me now."

This had the opposite effect as Bellatrix snarled. Picking up her wand again, she turned her arm back to normal and quickly cast _incarcerous_. She grabbed the boy again.

"Hands off!" The boy cried. "Or my mum's hex'll hit you this time! I swear! My mum can beat my dad any day! You'll be sorry!" Bellatrix ignored him.

This time, however, it seemed as though the boy was bluffing. His mother had cast no such deadly hex.

By now Snape had a good guess to whose child was in trouble. "Merlin be damned," he muttered. "Potter's brat of all people."

Hastily, Snape shed his casual clothes in favor of his normal robes. He mentally added this to the long list of things he hated James Potter for. "That failure of a wizard, if he wanted to hex Lestrange, he could've at least killed her for the rest of us."

* * *

Office at Durmstrang

"Draco, will you talk to me now?" Narcissa begged. "Look, I'm sorry about how I yelled at you yesterday, but I was in a very stressful situation."

"No, it's alright mother," Draco said mildly, startling Narcissa out of her un-Malfoy-like slump. "I'm sure that in a crisis, I'd lose my mind as well."

Narcissa frowned, unsure of how to take that comment. "Well," she said after a moment. "I suppose I owe the werewolf something now, seeing as he talked to you. Draco, do you think he likes pastries?"

Draco let out a long breath. _Should I tell her?_ He felt a particularly sadistic annoyance at his mother. After all, the woman had all but abandoned him. Why should he be considerate and tell her what Remus and he had planned?

"What did Lupin say to you anyway?" Narcissa had now turned around, inspecting their new home with critical eyes. Draco had the feeling that she really didn't care for what he had to say. She ran her hands along the top of a shelf, scowling at dust that Draco couldn't see.

"_Remus_ said you're only capable of rescuing dresses, that's why you didn't come help me," he said, a clear challenge in his words. He'd taken to calling the werewolf by his first name, at least when he wasn't around. "And I must say I agree."

In a flash, she had whirled around, blue eyes glittering fiercely. "Why that- brat! I mean, I'd heard _stories_ about him being the same as my cousin, but _this_! I'd always thought he was the _quiet_ one. I'll show him. I'm a perfectly capable witch." She crossed her arms. "How should we repay him, Draco? A hex in his pastries? Preferably a nasty one that involves Black as well."

"Mother."

His mother had an extremely un-Malfoy-like glint of mischief in her eyes. It was times like these that Draco saw resemblance between her and Black. "I wonder if they've done it yet. I _could _make something important fall off in the midd-"

"Mother!"

Narcissa stopped talking. She had a strange expression on her face, as if she was close to solving a puzzle that was close at hand. Draco swallowed, glaring at her. "I'm tired, mother. I will go to bed now."

His mother just stared at him. "Draco, it's barely morning."

"Exactly."

Of course, Draco didn't go to bed. There was a cloud of excitement in him. In his head, he was already imagining, as he often did back at Malfoy mansion, a different life. There was no doubt in his mind that Remus Lupin was the kindest man he'd ever met. Young and, despite the depressed expression he always wore, there was bright air around him. He could be the only other person in the room and it would seem full of life.

It had occurred to Draco just a little while ago that, living with Remus also meant living with his mother's cousin; Sirius Black.

Now Black was someone Draco did not understand at all, with his constant smirk, quick tempers and fathomless eyes. The man had an ease with the world, making a joke out of even Lord Voldemort's cruelty. He was a dangerous man to associate with, yet… at the same time, stepping in time with him promised adventures and things Draco had never seen before.

Yes… the future was good.

Now he had to tell Harry Potter. It gave him a thrill to think that _Harry's_ Remus Lupin had promised to take care of _Draco_.

He drew the shutters closed in his room, letting darkness settle in him. Casually swinging his old Invisibility Cloak (actually his father's, but Lucious had never noticed it missing from his study) over one shoulder, Draco adjusted his pants. Mirror walking was something he was good at. If Remus was brave and Black was strong, and Harry had ridden on a broom before, Draco was a wraith like his father. Clapping his hands together briefly, Draco pressed his palms against the smooth surface. A picture of Harry's perplexed face rose in his mind.

A smile rose on Draco's face. He genuinely liked Harry, who had a skeptical look that told Draco when he went over the line far more effectively than Narcissa's annoying words. Not that Draco often heeded those disapproving looks, but still, it felt… good.

"Come on, take me to Harry," Draco said.

The world of the mirror was strange, with layers of windows overlapping each other. He felt his way around, gingerly touching the edges of every mirror, before grabbing at one that felt slightly warmer than the rest. Panting slightly now, for a certain force always pushed him away from the mirrors, Draco peered through the glass, making sure the coast was empty before leaping through.

And landed in an unfamiliar hallway. Dark was all around him. This was far from the cheerful, slightly childish room that Harry owned. This room had no posters of James Potter in his Quidditch outfit, no Lily Potter's ten Commandments, and no Harry.

In fact, the hallway looked eerily like the ones at Durmstrang School. Draco nearly stopped breathing for a moment, and could've sworn he heard heavy footsteps from down the hall. Hands trembling, he drew the Invisibility Cloak tightly around him and quietly willed away the bright panic that had flashed into his mind.

Voldemort! His mind screamed. Every one of his senses told him to run, lest the man should suddenly appear around a corner, cruel eyes laughing.

_No,_ he mouthed to himself, leaning heavily against the wall. _No Voldemort._ If there's anyone here, it had to be Harry. But where would Harry be?

Now that he was slightly calmer, Draco could hear the quiet murmurs of talking in the next room. Taking a deep breath to still his nerves, the boy forced his rubbery legs to shift.

Step… step… His own footsteps seemed unbearably loud.

"This isn't working, Lestrange. The brat's not talking." The voice was a low murmur. Draco slid against the wall, completely silent, just as he'd practiced at Malfoy Manner. He knelt and slipped a finger between the slight opening of the door. The slit of the door widened unnoticeably and Draco leaned in a little to see into the room.

It was a few seconds later that he fully processed the scene in the dark, windowless room. A decidedly good thing, for he would probably have gasped and warned the Death Eaters. A slow knot tied itself in his throat, and the ringing started again in his ears.

Blood. He hated blood. Never thought much about it, but after the incident the day before, the sight of anything red made him sick to his stomach.

There was _that_ much blood, he reasoned with himself. Closing his eyes briefly, Draco willed the nausea to fade before looking again.

Harry had several slight scratches on one side of his face, bleeding slowly. Some sort of magical bindings wound around his hands and feet, and he was sitting in an awkward position against the wall. His green eyes were wary, trained on the other figures in the room. Draco counted seven Death Eaters surrounding him. He let out a shaky breath.

"We haven't started yet," the tall woman said. A grin grew on her face. Draco swallowed as he recognized his aunt Bellatrix's cool, amused voice and pretty, dignified face. "Besides, the longer they hold out, the more they spill. That's the general rule."

Why was Harry at Durmstrang? Was he kidnapped? He must've been kidnapped, Draco couldn't imagine the boy ever leaving the sanctuary of his parents' and friends' homes.

"Ahh-" Harry yelped as the woman aimed a sharp kick to his side. He glared at the woman. "Merlin you know who you- ahh- remind me of?"

Harry obviously wasn't in any great pain yet, but Bellatrix's face darkened as he continued to speak. "You remind me of Dudley, this fat muggle-" he gasped as Bellatrix grabbed his collar to lift him up. "You- look just like him"

A dull crack sounded as Harry was slammed back against the wall. For a moment, his head rolled back as if dazed.

Draco felt a strange burning sensation spread from the pit of his stomach. This was Harry they were talking about, not another dull, slippery Death Eater child. His fists tightened.

How dare they. Harry was not like them. The torture that Voldemort gave Draco, it can't happen to Harry. The very idea was preposterous. Harry existed in an entirely different world than those Death Eaters!

He had to save Harry. But how? It wasn't as if he knew many deadly curses. No matter how superior Malfoys might be to other wizards and witches, there was no way he could fight off all of them at once.

_Think, Draco, there is a way out of this._

"Hey! How is he supposed to talk like that, Lestrange! A few insults never caused any harm." The man was roughly pushed aside as Bellatrix stalked past him, still fuming.

"Alright, start with the Cruciatus," she snapped as Harry groaned and tried to sit up again. "Hurry up, we haven't got all day."

Draco ignored the screeching warning in his head, prompting his body to turn and run. _Danger!_ _He'll get you again! He'll find you! He'll hurt you again if you don't run!_

_Voldemort isn't here, _Draco told himself. _He's not going to find me. I'm going to help Harry and he isn't going to ever find out._

With great effort, he willed himself to move, tugging the Invisibility Cloak tightly around himself and easing the door open. Deepening his voice as much as possible, he cleared his throat.

At once all the Death Eaters looked up, a slight hint of alarm crept into their eyes.

"Let the boy go," Draco ground out. His voice didn't even sound like a child's, partly because of his pretense, but also due to the dry lump caught in his throat. "Don't touch him, or else!"

"Stop gawking!" Bellatrix snapped, drawing out her wand. "He's either disillusioned or under a cloak. Hex him and he'll show himself-"

"Run!" Harry suddenly burst out. "Run and get someone! Run!"

Draco dodged away as curses flew from the room. Silently, he slipped back inside the mirror, huddling there as he heard Bellatrix and her cronies slip by, beginning to cast revealing spells. The dim hall lit up with their magic.

"He can't have gone far," his aunt's sharp voice seemed so close that she might've been speaking into the mirror. Draco wasn't brave enough to look up and see. Several voices answered her before loud footsteps faded away into the distance.

Draco held his breath as he listened for the complete silence. Cautiously, he peered through the bottom of the mirror, seeing the hallway empty. He slipped through the dusty glass and landed on the floor, Invisibility Cloak in place.

Nothing.

Incredulously, Draco inched towards the room again. It couldn't be this easy… A quick glance into the room showed only an immobilized Harry, no Death Eaters.

A slow warmth seeped into his chest. Regardless of what his parents thought, he _was_ a good wizard after all, to so easily outwit a group of Death Eaters. He quickly crossed the room towards the boy.

"Harry," he said, voice normal, beginning to remove his cloak.

"Shut up!" Harry whispered urgently. "Stop it, Neville Longbottom. Put it back on!"

"Wha-" Draco rocked back a step. _Who in the world is Neville Longbottom?_ He watched in confusion as Harry's gaze flickered towards the far corner of the room. A cold feeling crept into Draco's chest at the fear in the younger boy's eyes.

"Careless fool!" A deep, dry voice startled Draco as he whipped around to stare at the tall, hooded man stepping forwards from the shadows. He then noticed the two motionless forms sprawled before him.

The man carelessly pulled back the cloth obscuring his face and fixed his black, hollow gaze on Draco's face. Gasping, the boy drew his cloak across his face.

He couldn't hear his own heart beat, so terrified as he was at that moment. The man looked strangely familiar, with his too-pale skin and black hair.

Harry struggled to his knees, glaring up at the man. "What do you want? You're not one of them. What do you want with me and Neville?"

_What's with this Neville business?_ Draco felt it nagging at the back of his mind. Did Harry really not recognize him? Merlin damn the brat.

He shook his head to rid himself of the irritation. Where had he seen the man before?

"You're a disgrace, Draco Malfoy," the man said quietly. Harry jerked in surprise. "Don't you even have the sense to check if they've left men in the room?"

Draco swallowed, too preoccupied to be hurt by this comment. He recognized this man! He had attended Narcissa's parties on several occasions, gloomily arriving and leaving moments afterwards. His name… Draco was sure he'd heard the man's name before.

"Snape," he rasped.

The man looked slightly taken aback. "Very good, Mr. Malfoy. I had not expected you to recognize me."

Draco said nothing. Was this man an enemy? He nearly backed away as Snape approached, before remembering Harry and standing his ground.

"_Finite Incantatum_," Snape muttered. Harry sagged against the ground as he was freed, wincing as he tried to bring his feet under him. Warily, Draco bent down and pulled the younger boy to his feet, eyes never leaving Snape's.

"I won't ask why you are here, Mr. Potter," Snape said briskly. "No doubt up to some mischief like your father always was. The two of you, get out of my sight."

Harry was about to retort, an angry knot between his eyes. Draco promptly wrapped his hand around the other boy's mouth and began dragging him from the room. Mindless of the younger boy's protests, Draco gave the tall man a long glance before the door clicked shut behind the two children.

Snape stood for a moment longer in the dimness of the room, the two unconscious Death Eaters beginning to stir behind him.

"A Malfoy and a Potter," he muttered. "Who would've thought." Well, at least that gave him less work to do. Silently, he slipped out the door, heading in the direction that Bellatrix Lestrange had taken to look for the Malfoy boy.

He couldn't figure out how the boy had avoided detection. The revealing charms should've rendered him visible.

Deep in thought, he ran into a group of agitated Death Eaters, Lestrange included. "Snape!" the woman saw him first, stalking up until they were mere inches apart.

"Did you see a disillusioned wizard or one under an Invisibility Cloak on your way here?" She demanded.

Snape gave her his best disdainful look. "If he was invisible," he said silkily, "how would I have seen him? I have no time to look for things you lost, finish your own missions, Lestrange."

Bellatrix's teeth ground together. "I caught the Potter brat, but we have an infiltrator here trying to save him. He's vanished completely."

"Indeed," his voice was sarcastic, "if it is the brat's champion you're trying to find, perhaps you should try looking for him where Potter is."

Bellatrix's face registered shock. "I'd left two men in the room, but you're right, it there was more than one-"

She frantically pushed past him, running back towards the room. Snape stood by emotionlessly as they passed, before sighing and heading back to his office.

* * *

"You didn't even know who I was," Draco snapped. "You thought I was some Neville Longbottom! You have no right to be mad at me."

"I knew who you were," Harry stomped by his side. "I knew you were Draco when you first showed up by the door. I mean, how often have I heard your voice? I just didn't want _him_ to know who you were. You'd get in a lot of trouble that way. And _he_ had no right to talk about my dad that way-"

"Snape helped us," Draco didn't look at him. "In my opinion, he can say whatever he wants as long as he doesn't tell Voldemort on me."

Harry swung in front of him, that same skeptical expression on his face. "I don't believe for a minute that you would've just taken it if he insulted _your_ dad."

"Well he didn't," Draco retorted. "Which just proves that _my_ dad is better than yours."

Harry snorted, running slightly ahead. "See if I talk to you for the rest of the day."

"Hey, I _saved_ you," Draco called, a little put out. "Show a little more gratitude, Potter."

Harry stopped, obviously uneasy. Turning around, he had a genuine look in his eyes. "Yeah, sorry," he mumbled. "Thank you, that was very… brave."

"Right," Draco crossed his arms in front of his chest. "You don't know how bad the Cruciatus is. Or you'd fully appreciate what I did."

Grinning, Harry bowed deeply. "Forgive me, oh brave one. I owe you my life. How can I possibly repay you?"

Draco rolled his eyes. A thought occurred to him. "And just who is Neville Longbottom anyway? If I have to pretend to be him whenever we're in trouble, I better know what he's like."

"Erm…" Harry swallowed. Knowing Draco, he'd definitely kill Harry if he knew that Neville was a shy, clumsy and good natured boy who wasn't too great at magic. "It's just a name that popped up."

Draco stared at Harry suspiciously, and was about to comment when a shout from down the hall caused all their arguments to be forgotten.

"There he is! That's the Potter brat! How in the world did he escape?"

Draco grabbed Harry's arm, swinging the Invisibility Cloak over both of them as they ran.

A spell crashed behind them, and the bottom of Draco's robes were momentarily visible before the spell dimmed. Turning a sharp corner, they managed to avoid the hexes through their way as the Death Eaters located them. However, with the harsh echoes of their footsteps through the school corridors, Draco had no doubt that the Death Eaters couldn't be shaken off.

Mirrors and paintings flew by, but if Draco fled by himself using Mirror Walk, what would happen to Harry?

"Draco-" Harry gasped, as if reading his mind. "Do it- it's- easier if I-"

"Shut up-" Draco panted. "You're the- idiot that- got himself- caught-" He tightened his grip around the younger boy's arm. He couldn't leave Harry. But what in the world could he do?

* * *

Infirmary of Durmstrang

"Is that everything?" Sirius asked, glancing around the infirmary. Remus had insisted they come back to make sure Peter would be safe from the Dark Lord's wrath. Sirius had, of course, came up with several sets of elaborate lies that would divert Voldemort's attention to teach a very exasperated Peter.

"No worries," Peter sighed. "Even you hadn't bothered to come down, I would've spotted danger when my clabbert warns me and I could've flooed somewhere safe. You don't think I've been doing this for seven years for nothing, do you? I'd faced worse when the Dark Lord thought I was hiding James from him."

"Ah, and you didn't need my help at all back then did you? If Voldemort had ever gotten solid proof-"

Remus felt a headache wash over him.

"Relax, Padfoot," Peter finally said. "I'll be fine. I'm actually in a hurry, so I'll leave you alone for a while." He passed Remus on his way to the door, stopped, and peered at the werewolf curiously.

"Moony? You're a bit pale," he said nervously, throwing a quick glance at Sirius to see if the man took offense. This… relationship his two friends were in… was tentative at best, and Peter really didn't want to be drawn into a fight. "T- take care of yourself, you hear?" The last phrase, he quickly said and left.

Sirius heaved a long sigh. Remus half expected the other man to speak up about Peter's comment, but the room stayed silent. Having a hiding place at Durmstrang was the only solution, with the tension between Voldemort and Sirius. Leaving the hideout would immediately be seen as treason, thereafter making him an enemy of the Death Eaters.

Remus peered out the side of his eyes at Sirius. He was, in all essence, between a rock and a hard place. To the Ministry, he was a wanted criminal. To the Order, a renown Death Eater. To Voldemort, a traitor. Yet, the confident smile never once left his face.

In fact, the only thing Sirius seemed concerned about right then was how to deal with Remus.

He wasn't sure quite how to feel about that. Sirius wasn't such a fool that he'd be unaware of his present situation. Neither was he the type to trap himself without leaving a backdoor.

Remus never considered himself slower than Sirius, but he could see no way out.

"Wormtail's right, you know?" Sirius suddenly spoke up, voice nonchalant. "You're a bit pale. That's… I guess… that's expected from what happened last night, and full moon just passed, so…"

Remus said nothing. What was Sirius getting at?

"Let's eat something good tonight and turn in early," Sirius pondered. "After all, it's unlikely that Voldemort would call on me for a while. He's testing me, or us, rather. It'll be good to sleep in after the last few days, wouldn't it. You could use rest too."

"So what are you going to do about that," Remus finally blurted. Pride put aside, he had to know what the other werewolf had planned. It concerned both of them.

"About what, Voldemort?" Sirius smirked. "Even for him, he can't do anything against me yet. With Malfoy out of the country, I'm the next man down. What do you think'll happen if he claimed that his second in command was a traitor? He's not that much of a fool. Neither of us are doing _anything_ until Malfoy returns. Then it'll all depend on which of us gets to him first."

Malfoy wasn't around at all. Remus felt his heart skip a beat. That would be the reason why Voldemort was lying low. Malfoy had left on a mission elsewhere, and the relationships between the Death Eaters were fragile.

_Where was Malfoy?_

"You have faith in Malfoy's love for his child," Remus said slowly. The next part was painful to say. "What if… that wasn't the case… if Malfoy doesn't care about what happened to Draco. If his loyalty surpasses his love for the boy, what then?"

Sirius shrugged. "Then the worse happens."

But Remus could tell it bugged the other man. The worried knot between his brows cast an ominous shadow over his eyes. It was the first hint of uncertainty he had shown, and Remus slowly breathed out. There was one thing he had to know.

"Padfoot," he said softly. Sirius sat up abruptly, surprised at the old nickname. Gray eyes met his, intense.

"What is it?"

"Do you still side with Voldemort?" He needed to know this. "If you didn't have… ulterior motives, you wouldn't have joined him, right? That was the only reason, wasn't it? Surely… you don't agree with him…"

"I never agreed with his goals," Sirius said immediately. There was a soft, vulnerable sort of desperation in Remus' eyes. Warm, mesmerizing hazel drew him in. Sirius swallowed. Did Remus have any idea what he was doing to him? "Extermination of muggles, promoting purebloods, I never agreed with any of it."

"Then would it- I mean," Remus looked away. Sirius' heart pounded painfully. "Would it be so bad to be labeled a traitor of the Death Eaters?"

Sirius grinned. "Not if he broke his word first." Then he grew thoughtful. "Voldemort's changed. He's had this obsession with his Slytherin heritage for decades, but… he was a respectable man. He was ruthless and cruel, but not always unnecessarily. I… didn't feel so bad about working under him before. I've never liked the Ministry."

"The fame got to him," he continued ruefully. "I don't think… any of the Death Eaters expected that. For most of us… it's just that… we've come too far to stop now. We've faced the Ministry too many times, first starting off as negotiations, then fights… and of a sudden both sides had their first corpse… then the raids started happening."

"And you were all frogs in a pan slowly heating to a boil," Remus finished, voice barely above a whisper.

"Stupid, isn't it," Sirius spat. "To think all of us were naïve enough to believe that we could sweep in and take the Wizarding world in mere years, without so much blood, and the out front confrontations."

"And then," he stared at Remus. "I thought that I'd get to be with you. That, things would be easier for you… us… It wasn't fair that, while everything was done to make humans safe from werewolves, nothing was done in the reverse."

Remus shut his eyes, Sirius, at that moment, was too much like the young, idealistic boy he had fallen for at Hogwarts. One who always concerned himself with what should've been and what rubbed him wrong about the world.

How ironic was it that of the four Marauders, Sirius was the-

Both werewolves shot upwards, staring intensely at the door. They had heard something. A low rumble in the distance that screamed of danger. Remus concentrated hard, trying to sense the lingering feelings in the air.

"What is it?" Sirius whispered.

Remus shook his head. He didn't know. The uneasiness in them grew, and Remus began to taste fear. Rushed footsteps began to echo.

Red flashed in the clabber's horns. Heavy panting could be heard right outside the infirmary door. Alarmed, Sirius darted forward so that he was between the door and his mate.

The door flew open, shutting quickly, but Remus saw nothing.

"What in the world-" Sirius started. A second passed and relief flooded the room. As if the sight of the two of them promised safety.

"Remus!" a young boy's voice gasped. There was a brief moment of struggle before the air in front of them lifted to reveal two young faces, red from the run and panting. The shorter boy with messy black hair immediately launched himself at Remus, ignoring a bewildered Sirius.

"H-Harry?" Remus choked, trying to regain his breath. "Merlin- Harry? What- Why in the world?"

"I wanted to see you," Harry cried. "Mom and Dad wouldn't tell me if you were safe, and it was just full moon a couple days ago. Remus, I didn't mean to cause trouble- I-"

Draco, irritated at Harry's actions, reached over to drag the young boy off. "Can't do this now," he hissed. He turned to Sirius, whose face remained unreadable as he watched the clabbert's horn glowing bloody red near the ceiling.

"They're after us," Draco said urgently. "They're going to be in here any minute now."

"Who?" Remus asked, but the moment the word left his mouth, he knew, Death Eaters. Who else? His ears once again picked up the faint sounds of footsteps down the hall.

"Damned," Sirius spat. "Alright, let's do this."

* * *

Not quite R-rated, but a non-con situation: DO NOT read if you are easily disturbed

Sirius reached over, grabbing Draco and Harry by the scruff and dragged them into the corner. Both boys began to protest before Sirius threw the Invisibility Cloak over them. Draco seemed to catch on, pulling the edges of the cloak tightly around them until not even werewolf eyes could spot them.

"Let them come," Sirius turned to Remus, eyes darkening. Slowly, he unbuttoned his robes and the shirt underneath, exposing long, sinewy muscles in his neck and chest. Remus swallowed and began to back away, wary of the predatory tilt on the other man's smirk.

"What are you- mmmph!" An arm wound around his waist and Remus felt a brief moment of terror as his feet left the ground. A second later, he was on his back on the hospital bed, with Sirius' tongue diving between his lips.

"Pa-" His mind went blank. Gripping the man's shoulders, Remus pushed hard. Sirius shifted slightly, before pressing down on him again, eyes dark with lust.

"Shh… Moony…" Sirius managed to pin down one of his wrists. Somewhere in the background, Remus heard Harry's muffled scream as Sirius roughly tore open the front of his shirt. Their skin touched and Remus bit down on his tongue at the over-whelming heat.

"Padfoot! Stop- ahh-" Remus cried out as teeth nipped at his throat. A large hand snaked between his legs. Gasping for breath, he clamped his knees together, turning away from Sirius' heated breath.

"You're mine," Sirius whispered. The door of the infirmary slammed open, revealing two black robed men. They stopped upon seeing the two, and an awkward silence fell over them.

Remus was panting hard, his heart pounding rapidly in his throat. Taking advantage of Sirius' momentary hesitation, he shoved the man away and slid off the bed. His feet nearly buckled when he stood, but Remus stumbled towards the wall, pressing his face against it.

Sirius watched him go for a second, before a low growl rumbled from him. Abruptly he turned to the two intruders.

Slowly, he rose to his feet, towering above the other Death Eaters. Remus didn't need to look to know that the man had the same dark, deadly glint in his eyes. He turned slightly so he could observe Sirius' actions.

Robes slowly crept against the ground. Barely suppressed lust and anger churning in the air, Sirius approached the newcomers.

"W- we- that is- um-" one of the Death Eaters stammered. Sirius was terrifying, every inch of his rippling muscles tensed and his long dark hair sweeping wildly over them. He was smiling again: a dark, deadly smirk that usually appeared before he killed.

"Yes, gentlemen?" Sirius hissed, uncannily resembling the Dark Lord. "Can I do something for you?" When neither answered, he leaped forward, pinning one of them to the wall by his throat. The other blinked rapidly, trying to process what happened. "Fools! Do you know what you've interrupted?"

"There was- um… two people under an Invisibility Cloak," the other man whimpered. "We- we didn't know you were- in the middle of- I mean- We just wanted to know if they're there."

"Haven't seen them," Sirius growled. He released the Death Eater, and the man sank to his knees, choking and holding his throat. "But then," Sirius' voice was deceptively soft, "I have been… otherwise preoccupied. Search all you want."

"Th- thank you, we'll be out in just a moment," the Death Eater whimpered.

Sirius ignored them, instead turning towards his mate, tensed and bewildered by the wall. He glided towards Remus, slowly licking his lips.

Remus shivered, unable to look away from the laughing, lust-filled gaze Sirius was sending him. Turning so his back was towards the wall, Remus lowered himself into a crouch. His mouth was dry, and his breathing came in shallow gasps. What- what in the world was Sirius planning? Remus dodged past Sirius and raced for the door.

If Sirius wasn't also a werewolf, Remus was sure he could've gotten away.

"Ow-" Sirius grabbed his wrist, hard enough to bruise, pulling him towards the corner where Draco and Harry was.

"Where did you think you were going?" Sirius asked softly, pinning the other werewolf against the wall. "We've just started."

Something hard was pressed against Remus' thigh from behind. He swallowed when he realized it must be either Draco's or Harry's head, completely hidden under the cloak. It was all he could do to press his hands against both walls of the corner, bracing himself against Sirius' weight. If he didn't, he would've collapsed on top of the two boys and crushed them both. The two children squirmed behind him, and a involuntary kick nearly knocked his feet out from under him.

Remus caught a quick glance over Sirius' shoulder to see the two Death Eaters casting spells around the hospital. The clabbert on the ceiling screeched to get out of the way.

A large hand on his chest distracted him. Sirius was kissing him again, leisurely and teasingly. Teeth nibbling on his lower lip. Remus' jaw trembled, teeth clattering against each other briefly, before Sirius deepened the kiss.

Fingers crept into his hair, smoothing out limp strands as Sirius' tongue invaded his mouth, easily overrunning his defenses and began toying with his.

"What are you doing?" He gasped as Sirius' lips finally left his. "Not here! What are you thinking?"

"Should be thankful," Sirius laughed darkly. Pushing Remus' face upwards so that their eyes met. "I won't start anything serious until they leave. But when they leave- ha! You're not going to walk for a while."

"Bastard!" Remus ground out, trying to maintain balance and push the other man away at the same time.

Behind Sirius, the two men found the hidden room at the back of the hospital. Finding nothing else, they hastily left, red-faced and trembling.

Sirius latched onto Remus' neck, sucking hard. It was almost painful, and Remus' breath hitched. That one was going to leave a mark.

End of R-rated Scene. You have my permission to read now

* * *

When the last of the footsteps echoed out of their keen werewolf hearing, Sirius stopped, panting as hard as Remus was and leaned back.

"That was- some acting… wasn't it?" He laughed weakly.

"Act?" Remus forced, shoving the other man away. He stumbled forward slightly. "Act." Anger was beginning to seep in. "Act, was it?"

"Not to say I didn't- enjoy it or anything," Sirius winked. "We can certainly- continue if you want."

"You-" Words failed him. Remus sank down against the wall, far too exhausted now that the sudden rush of adrenaline had left his veins. "You're impossible."

"Does that mean we can continue?" Sirius squatted before him, smirk back in place. "I did say that after they left… heh… you wouldn't want me to be a liar, would you?"

A muffled sound from the corner caused both werewolves to forget their banter, remembering for the first time that they were not alone. Invisibility Cloak pulled away, Draco could be seen with a hand tightly clamped around Harry's mouth. They both look as winded as Remus.

"No, no, don't worry about us," Draco smiled shakily, but there was a glint in his eyes. "Continue." He waved the two adults away and slowly began to get up.

"Draco!" Remus bite out, scandalized. "You-" The boy winked at him, folding his cloak and straightening his robes.

Harry climbed to his knees, face pale and eyes unfocused. "I think," he announced calmly, "I'm going to faint. Sorry to cause trouble."

But he didn't, staying in that position for a few seconds before staggering to his feet. Sirius had a curious expression on his face, eyes fixed on the little boy's face.

"Harry," he said, awe in his voice. "You're James' son, aren't you."

"Hm?" Harry looked up. "Yeah. And you… why did you… kiss Remus?"

Heat spread on Remus' cheeks. Self consciously, he closed the front of his shirt, doing up as best he could the mismatched buttons Sirius had destroyed. He was… very tempted to wipe that confident smile off Sirius' face by saying something nasty, but none of the colorful language entering his mind would've helped in the slightest.

"What does James not kiss Lily anymore?" Sirius shook his head at Harry's slightly disgusted face. "I thought so, he can't change if his life depended on it. I would've thought the world ended if he stopped."

Harry watched Sirius' face quietly. "Then you're the one that took Remus away. The one mum was talking about. The one who…"

Remus could practically hear Harry's unspoken words. With as much dignity as he could muster, Remus rose to his feet and started towards the infirmary door. "Perhaps we should discuss this somewhere more private."

* * *

At the Head Quarters

By the time James reached the Head Quarters after noon, he was clean… sort of. His hair was messy enough to hide the green substance that oozed from it.

He slunk into the meeting room discretely, hoping no one would notice him. But of course, he had no such luck. The moment he brushed by the first Order member, the Prewett brothers glanced at his hair skeptically.

"You've got to find how to appease your wife," the older brother commented. James wished the earth would eat him at that moment, but his son was foremost on his mind.

"Any news at all?" He asked. Let them laugh if they wanted. Just wait until _they_ get married, then they'd stop laughing.

"Actually," the younger Prewett frowned, "Snape owled in earlier, said he found your son."

"You're serious," James gasped. "Where? Has to be at Durmstrang. But how? How did he get there?"

"Lestrange got to him, but apparently, Harry wasn't hurt too bad."

James breathed slightly easier. "Where is he now?"

No way Severus Snape was kind enough to take his son in. Harry wasn't out of danger yet. Snape was, James really did not like the man, no matter how many times Dumbledore vouched for his loyalty, he didn't quite believe.

Dumbledore was a man James had a ridiculous amount of trust in. If anything, Dumbledore, in James' eyes had taken on an almost all-knowing role. Since when had any student been able to deceive the Headmaster? But then, Dumbledore had also vehemently denied that Sirius Black could ever hurt Remus; look what happened in Seventh year. He was only human, right?

James both hated and distrusted Snape.

"In Durmstrang somewhere," Fabian Prewett looked away. "Snape managed to help him get away, but Harry's wandering Durstrang with… of all people… Malfoy's boy."

"Curious, actually, yours and Malfoy's sons," Gideon scratched his head. "I have no clue how that could've happened. They've never met, thought they might've heard about each other."

James frowned, trying to think back. Malfoy's boy… hadn't he seen Malfoy's boy recently? When they were rescuing Remus, Narcissa and Draco Malfoy were there. It seemed as though Sirius' relationship with one of his cousins was good…

If Harry was with Draco Malfoy, that may be good news.

"Alright," he breathed. "That's two of them we must save… Listen, we have to convince Dumbledore. Think of the Durmstrang students after school starts, having Voldemort in the midst. Durstrang must be attacked."

* * *

Author's Note:

Just as a formal announcement, I have not abandoned this story, or School of Pureblood Wizards.

Now…

SOOORRYYYY! OMG, and I actually said I would update often during the summer… T.T…

I hate myself.

However, part of the blame lies in HBP. I mean… there were some drastic changes to a lot of the characters. (trying hard to avoid spoilers in case people haven't read it) Truth be told, I liked the Harry from the first few books better (cries). So I'd been doing quite a bit of thinking to keep them a little more in character.

It's… um… getting a little harder to see Harry as the more submissive party in a relationship, you know? ; He's just so… angry all the time now…

So, many of my characters are officially OOC. (not that they weren't before) However, consider this… I doubt anyone growing up with James Potter could NOT have a sense of humor. And Harry would be more open if he didn't grow up with the Dursleys, right?

Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed. I still love you all. I can't say when the next part's going to be. I'm hoping within a month, but don't trust me on that…

And yes, university sucks and is as hard as I thought. Got Cs in almost everything. (cries) Midterms are done, but I'm still spending a ridiculously large amount of time studying.

Sorry for the abundance of spelling mistakes and logic mistakes and just… bad writing which I'm sure is in a lot of this chapter. It lacks the emotion I felt when I wrote the other ones, but…

I just had a sudden urge to write tonight and it's getting really late, so I'm not going to try editing it too much. Hopefully, I'll repost it with some changes… um… ASAP… (which is a long time in the future).

And we have a reappearance from evil-dark-Sirius, even if it was just part of an act (or was it?) Nothing spectacular happened in this chapter… and I thought the highlight was Remus' conversation with Draco, which… I guess was a resolution to one character's problem. Now one of the Godfather relationship is outlined. The other characters are still wallowing in problems.

Please bear with this chapter for now, I promise the next one will be better. There's a lemon next chapter. That's good news, right?

If you have any good plot suggestions, please share? (puppy face) I'm open to suggestions at this point due to massive re-thinking of plot.

PS. Please petition against very, very, very bad animal torture at it's so sad, I cried for so long after that. But do NOT watch the videos there unless you can stand like… NC-17 violence. I'm serious. Please help even if you don't like PETA, this one really upset me.

Emi:  
(waves MY back up copy of manga) MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Deleting will not help! I will procrastinate as much as I want, MWAHAHAHAHA! And you know you secretly love the manga too much to delete them. (suspicious looks). I HAVE converted you, haven't I? Or can it be that Emi is not a pervert like me yet? I am… what? One day over the two week deadline (makes weird faces at Emi)

Goddess of Idun:  
Heh… but Draco's way out of character, isn't he? From the book… he's _supposed_ to be quite… dislikable… if it weren't for fan girls like us, right? No worries, ; I thought you meant Sirius was obsessed with Draco, but then, I'm not the brightest light bulb in the house… Hope you still like the kid, because he's actually going to be appearing a lot in future chapters. Cheers for OOC Draco Malfoy and obsessive Sirius Black.

Apus-Equuleus:  
I know… I know… don't kill me… . … I meant to update really early, but I've had a total of four blocks on this single chapter… and before, one of them was enough to handle… But thank you so much for the second review, it gave me warm fuzzy feelings for a week.  
But anyhow, I've actually been reading up on biographies of some of the characters for inspiration. That's when I realized that background research was probably a good idea for fanfics as well as originals, if not more (sigh)… My characters were more OOC than I thought, and a lot of the facts contradict JKR's view of the world… all bad, bad things.  
And I think the hardest thing about the characters for me right now is to capture at what TIME I want their personalities follow. Harry Potter charas are changing quite a bit, and I can't seem to match the pace of those changes in my own story. ; so yeah… bear with me while I try to figure this out.  
This chapter was mostly… a bit of a filler, that's why it seems like it's concentrating more on Draco/Harry. It's supposed to have a bit of everything: action, romance, scary-Sirius, humor, etc, you know?  
And yes, for you comment on Sirius/Remus being cannon, I'm greatly pleased that JKR encourages fan fiction too. Besides, she never specified _what_ type of fan fiction is good and what-not (at least, I hope not, I'm not an expert), so that's pretty promising that she accepts all kinds of love. ;  
Plot for the story's changed quite a bit, so things might seem a bit out of place for a while. The whole set-up is now… basically useless.

Scarlet Schizo:  
Yeah… an update finally… :… Two months after you reviewed. Heh… I will try my best to overcome writer's block faster now. But then, we all have problems with blocks, right?

Kirara:  
No, no, not abandoned. But really, the S/R fandom is blooming. Quite a few of the stories I thought were abandoned got updated over the summer, so yeah, I would be the worse one if I dropped out when everyone came back, right? Thank you so much, I'll not abandon this until it's finished. (technically, that's not called abandoning, is it?)

Justafan:  
It's been about 5 months now, ; and I'll just copy/paste the various apologies I'd written above. But anyways, the past is past, and the update's here. So read, and try you best to enjoy until the next one, kay?

Bonnie:  
They will, they will, they will soon enough. And hopefully, I can manage to write a tasteful lemon… And even after their first time, there can still be plenty of sexual tension, right? And yay for Narcissa! She's actually getting to be a very likeable character in this story. Didn't REALLY mean for that to happen. Thx.

Noelle:  
Picks up ficcie and drags it out of abandoned basket. Nope nope, wrong sorting. I will save this story as many times as I must. And reviewing is like getting thanked for doing your job. ; So it makes jobs worth doing, hey? Thank you so much for reviewing!

Death-Muncher:  
I feel like santa when I give out dark-evil-Sirius moments… o.O Is that natural. Anyways, this one isn't quite as angst, is it? And I'm a little sorry to say that Remus/Sirius would be getting over the majority of their problems soon, like, next chapter. However, there would be more darkness in general though, if my revised plot is going to work with me. Cheers.

Suckers love:  
Not happy at all, was it? I wanted to try my hand at intense, deliberate torture. I write lots of physical pain, but never any mental stress to go with it… Heh… Thank you, that gives me the courage to write more torture in the future… wait… is that a good thing necessarily?

Emma Lupin:  
Hm… the main thing that's wrong with Sirius/Remus bond is that the sire is not the dominant werewolf. But it's just that Remus noticed he's not as restricted to the submissive role as he was supposed to be. So it's not a normal-bond per say. It hasn't become a huge problem… yet… Muahaha… Hm… you know? The way your review sounded, it's as if you _want_ Remus to obey Sirius. (tries to wiggle eyebrow suggestively, but failing) Well, I'll try my best, thanks for reviewing!

FlamencoPenguin:  
Erm… (hides) the summer… evidently… didn't bring more updates, but I was very hopeful after reading your review. I was quite worried about chapter six, really…Hm… the second blood/guts part was more for Voldemort, showing a further step in his insanity. In my story, I've sort of made it so that Crouch's death and something that hasn't happened yet pushed him over the edge. I mean, didn't he seem interesting when he was talking to Remus? (blinks) Yes, Sirius, a point for him, will try to change for Remus, but of course… he's always been stubborn, right? -.-' I… sorta like angry!Sirius. I think it's hot… (drools), but then, I'm not always able to portray that hotness… (sighs)

Ora-shini-gi:  
Well, there wasn't much Sirius/Remus this chapter, but the next one or two (depends on how much I can cram into the first one) will be dedicated solely to them. Nobody else will have much of a say. Oh, except Snape, but then, he's always been the imaginary third party, ne?  
This chapter contains Harry's share of misery and my take on a not-so-wimpy Draco… I mean, I love Tom, but Draco was a wimp in the movies… seriously… But anyway, Harry and Draco are the main secondary characters in this fic.

EsScaper:  
Aww…. Yeah, I guess… I did apologize for it last chappie, but I think I could improve on that in the next chapter or so. I'm sorry I wasn't able communicate it well, but my take on Remus is that he's… worried. Both he and Sirius had changed quite a bit in seven years. Remus' 'dream' so to speak was based on his experiences with Sirius back in Hogwarts. It's impossible to return to that sort of relationship with whatever's happened. And Remus, logical as it is, 'knows' that it's an impossible relationship, so he wants to keep that memory sacred, something like that. He… honestly doesn't feel like it's possible to get along with Sirius. And you must admit, Sirius… didn't make things that comfortable for him. Well… that's kinda the gist of it, but the emotion's supposed to go deeper than that.  
Alright, I'm done my rant, and try to make things clearer in the story itself instead. They will definitely become lovers again, no worries. Thanks for reviewing!

YamikiofAnime:  
This chappie isn't as long as 6, but hey, it's not super-short either. Hope I didn't disappoint. Sorry this took so long. I would say it's not my fault, but it is, so… (ducks rotten oranges, and exploded pieces of yamiki)

RoschLupin-Black:  
Remus is a submissive… ; lol… just not as submissive as he thought he had to be. Not as submissive as a normal submissive werewolf would be. And yup, in one or two chapters (depending on how much I can fit in) James/Lily finds out that the incident in seventh year never actually happened. Heh… I hope I successfully foreshadowed that with the James bit at the end. It was supposed to remind people that 1) it didn't happen, 2) always trust Dumbledore… and well… a certain someone's loyalty is still undecided, because character-wise, I want to follow JKR, and she hasn't formally declared anything. (Hehe, I tried to leave openings for Peter as well, in case JKR has plans for him too)

Nightmare-chan22:  
; Well… the original plan was to have the Sirius - Harry Godfather relationship, and Remus - Draco Godfather (godmother? Lol, not that I really see Remus as a nagging mom, no I don't, nuh-uh) relationship. I'm glad it worked out ok, and I can show Draco caring about Remus and vice versa without it being awkward. In the books, they had almost nothing to do with each other though, right?  
Thanks for the review, my fan (nods stately), and I hope you can wait until the next chapter, which I will try my best to make it worth all the wait. I think I'd procrastinated so long that everyone started decomposing already… I know I'm well rotten in university. Sorry about that ;

MY MInD:  
O.O You've… impossible… you've read my mind! That's exactly what I'm planning. Well… except the "happy ever after" part. Muahahahaha. (insert more evil laughter here). JK, JK, I don't think I'd ever written a long piece without giving it a happy ending. Otherwise, I'd be depressed for days and days afterwards. No need to torture yourself, right? Yes. I hoped I kept up the quality.

TeeDee:  
Er… ; Sirius didn't flat-out state that he quit. It's a bit of a delicate situation for him. Not quite life-threatening… yet… But I'm glad you appreciated the characters in that chapter. I found Remus' wishy-washy attitude towards Sirius annoying, truthfully, but at the time, it was the best I could do. So let's hope our werewolf redeems himself, right? And yes… Voldemort's obsessed now… very… very much so… (evil snicker)

Hannio:  
Harry's alright. Draco came to his rescue, hehe… -.-'… alright enough giggling. I'm glad it wasn't boring, though I thought chapter 6 was a bit repetitive with 2 torture scenes, you know… even though they were a bit different. Sirius' reaction… lol, I'm pretty sure we all knew he was going to blow up, right? They _did_ promise to leave Remus alone.

The flame alchemist:  
Well… you just… um… did… wait for this update, I mean. ; Thank you so much. Hopefully you like this one just as much.

The Demonic Duo:  
I took my time on this one too, but most of that time I spent wallowing in self-pity, trying to karate-chop my writer's block. I need some more work. If only that last line could be… 'update as late as you want, heehee' … alright, alright. I know I have sinned, forgive me. (between Kreacher and that line, I'm not religious, I swear)

L Lives:  
Patience, patience, young one. While waiting for the fruit to mature… (what am I talking about?) They'll be together soon enough. (everyone's getting impatient… sigh) But I'm proud of Remus and Sirius for lasting this long without jumping in a bed. Aren't you?  
Sirius' patience is wearing thin as well, isn't it?

Next Chapter: The Yellow-streaked Fever


	8. The Yellow streaked Fever

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: M; LEMON!!!! WARNING! WARNING! RED ALERT!!! (If you do not know what a lemon is, it is sex. Mine may not be very graphic, but it will happen.) Oh, and a bit of angst, and this was meant to be a very sad chapter… so yeah.

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, minor deaths, lemon (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, adventure, angst (I guess)

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Note: Sirius will NOT die! Whatever you may think! I hate tragedies! And this will not be one!

* * *

Chapter 8: The Yellow-streaked Fever

The Archives of Judiciary Ministry Affairs had a rather simple, wooden door. It was the kind that squeaked the loudest when opened carefully. The hinges moaned sharply as a pair of bespeckled eyes blinked into the room.

"Lily?" The voice was a loud whisper. "Lily Potter… what are you doing here at this hour?"

The huddled form of the young woman didn't turn. Only the quiet rustle of a page told James that his wife was still awake. Cautiously, he eased the door open wider and stepped through.

"James Potter," Lily's strict voice was slightly preoccupied. "Step back out through that door. You are an Auror, not part of the Magistrates of Magical Law, and you're not allowed in the back room."

"It is three o'clock, Lily," James said exasperatedly. "Morning! Three o'clock! What's so important that it can't wait until after a good night's rest?"

"You can live without my toxic cooking for one night, Potter," Lily shot back, eyes still glued to her book. "Get to bed or your hair will be even worse tomorrow."

Sighing deeply, James plopped himself down in front of his wife. "Lily…" he said seriously. "You can tell me the truth you know… are you… cheating on me with these books? Surely they can't be as handso-"

Closing the large volume briskly, Lily tapped James lightly on the head. Her voice was teasing. "Don't be so full of yourself. The books are a hundred times better than you are. It's them over you any day."

"You missed two of Dumbledore's meetings in the last week, what's going on?" James asked quietly. "You disappeared right after you found out Harry was safe with Remus."

Lily was watching him with an unreadable expression. "Because…" she swallowed and looked away. "Because you didn't believe me. You thought he was innocent, that he could never hurt Remus. And…"

Their eyes locked. In Lily's tired green gaze, James saw all the love they had ever shared shining at him.

"And if you think Sirius Black is innocent, that's good enough for me. I'm the one with access to this place, so I ought to find out for sure." Lily shrugged. James felt something in him swell. He had always known that he had chosen correctly. It had never been possible for him to fall for anyone else.

Reaching out, he enveloped her hand with his.

Seeing James' ecstatic face, Lily frowned. "This is _not_ because I'm still _desperately_ in love with you or any such nonsense. You're not a bad judge of character, that's all." She smiled secretively but didn't pull her hand away. "After all, you did choose _me_, didn't you?"

"Shameless," James laughed. "Look who's full of herself now?"

"Unlike you," Lily laughed arrogantly. "_I_ am perfectly capable of accomplishing anything I set my mind to."

"Except cooking."

"_Cooking_ is… a way to continue life. If you don't kill anyone with it, you're perfectly capable." She paused. "And don't look at me like that, I've ever killed anyone with cooking."

Smoothly, James snatched the book from her hands. "Let's see what we've got here. 'Trials Concerning the Use and Abuse of Magical Creatures,' October 1977 to January 1978. What in the world is this?"

"Remus' trials were in a lot of the other records, but this one's the clearest," Lily kicked James in the knee and stole the book back. With the ease of one who had flipped through the same volume a hundred times, she pinpointed the desired page on her first try.

"December 28, evening, the trial of one Sirius Black for the non consensual sexual assault and violation of Remus J. Lupin."

"He had a _trial_? Isn't that a big business? How come, we've never heard anything of it at Hogwarts."

"A so-called 'trial' with a total of three people; the Minister, some random werewolf activist and a healer who checked Remus over after the incident." Lily's eyes gleamed. "Suspicious yet? None of our school nurses knew, and nobody at St. Mungos was contacted. One of Fudge's witches did the check over and claimed, beyond any doubt, that Remus was raped."

"You haven't answered my question, why didn't we hear about this?"

"Says here, Fudge had asked Remus and he didn't want to press charges. So the whole thing was hushed up and Sirius didn't get anything but a restraining order. James, _nobody_ knew about this. Remus apparently didn't even _know_ about the rape until he was told the next morning. What do you think?"

James thought hard. "So for all of Sirius' boasts, he was not so unforgettable after all. Ow-"

"I can't believe I married an idiot," Lily muttered. "They _lied_, James. There was no rape on Christmas night of seventh year. Everything hints at it. However, we have no proof. It would never stand in court, and we can't even put it under investigation without a motive. James, what would be their _motive_? Surely they had a motive for lying like this."

"Easy," James sighed. "The thing with Sirius and Remus could've developed into the rare werewolf marriage things. Hasn't been one of those in a hundred years, Lily. You think Fudge would take kindly to being the first Minister in a century to allow a werewolf marriage?"

Lily frowned. "He could've just refused."

"Ha! With Sirius' charm and Remus' mouth, they could've coerced the Ministry into anything, you know? Plus, Werewolf Code of Conduct, fifth section down, says they're allowed. Two consensual parties are allowed to mate and marry, with the consent of half the board of Higher Magistrates."

And talking to a board of doting grandparent-like witches and wizards was nothing compared to convincing giants and elves.

Lily stared. "You should've become a Magistrate instead of an Auror, James. I had no idea."

James made a pained expression. "It's the only thing I know. I kept trying to convince Remus to agree to it back in sixth year. Didn't work, of course, bloody stubborn idiot."

"So what should we do, James?" Lily promptly shut the book. "If one more nonsensical thing comes from your mouth, I'm kicking you out of the house. Be serious for once."

For a moment, James was silent, eyes locked on the ground. Lily began to fidget, uncomfortable with her husband's unnatural quiet. "James?"

"Christmas night, Lily?" James asked softly. "That was the night… wasn't it? When you gave me a heart attack by telling me you were pregnant?"

A blush crept up the young woman's cheeks. "You're on the couch tonight, James Potter! And here I thought you were finally concentrat-"

"Lily, I have proof," James said suddenly. "If it was Christmas night, I have proof. Remember the map? Our very own Marauder's Map?"

"James Potter, what does a _map_ have to do with anything?" Lily had never scored lower on a test than James, but she would _never_ understand how his mind worked. She wondered if he would always make her feel like a child.

* * *

"I don't care, Dumbledore. That was my final condition. I will only accept the moonchild as ambassador."

"Mr. Vance, I'm terribly sorry about that, but Voldemort's threat hangs over both of our doorsteps whether Remus is with us or not. We need you."

"How do I know he hasn't joined the Dark Lord, maybe _that's_ the side to be on. You know what I heard? I heard that the moonchild had a chance to return to you, but refused it. It raises suspicion, how you would tell us nothing. Without your ambassador, the pyrelings are withdrawing their support."

Pause.

"So be it. Mr. Vance, I cannot convince you that Remus stayed, not because he agreed with Voldemort's goals, but for entirely personal reasons. As for what those reasons are, I can't tell you without Remus' permission."

Dumbledore's visitor, with a voice almost as ancient as the Headmaster's, heaved a heavy, accented sigh. "A week, Dumbledore. My followers and I will be in London for a week. Contact me then."

There was a loud crack as the old visitor left by floo. The warm crackle of a fireplace inside Dumbledore's study continued for a moment.

"James, Lily, the door is unlocked, you know?" Dumbledore's voice rang out through the entrance.

The Headmaster smiled at the young couple that entered sheepishly. "New hobby you picked up, Lily? You've never eavesdropped before."

She blushed as deeply as her hair. "Sorry, Albus, blame him, really."

"Hey," James protested before turning to Dumbledore. "Do they really mean it? They'd withdraw their support. What do we do then? What if the giants are right after them, and the elves, the veelas?"

There was a twinkle in the old man's eyes behind his spectacles. "But what does that mean James? Perhaps this is a good thing. They are very much loyal to Remus. And we both have faith in him, don't we? Things will work out."

James' expression softened. "Yeah, you always were right about that, Albus. I actually came to ask for something."

"What is it, my boy?"

"My map, Albus… or… our map, the Marauder's Map. The one I gave you for safekeeping when we left Hogwarts. Do you still have it? This is important."

Dumbledore regarded him for a moment, before reaching inside his desk and pulling out an old, faded blank parchment. "James," he said softly. "Is this about seventh year?"

"You knew?" Lily asked in amazement.

"How could I not?" Dumbledore suddenly looked very tired. Ancient fingers pushed the parchment across his table. "One of the few things… I wish I could forget entirely… was how I could do nothing as one of my students were accused of crimes they did not commit."

"So you don't think Sirius did it either?" Lily said.

"I saw in the map what, I suspect, James remembered seeing. Sirius could not have done anything."

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," James told the map, brows knitted in concentration. Lily leaned over his shoulder as dark lines stretched across the old parchment.

"Show me what happened Christmas night, 1977," James told the map, and to Lily's amazement, the ink began lining against each other, curving into towers and stairs and rooms. She glanced up and saw that both her husband and Dumbledore were staring intently at the map. Puzzled, she stared at the moving dots strolling across the page.

"He's right there, Lily," James murmured, pointing at a dot across from her. A tiny label 'Remus Lupin' floated above the dot in miniscule letters. The small dot passed down through a hallway on third floor, and Lily's breath caught as she noticed the only other dot in the area.

They watched as Sirius' dot dragged Remus inside an empty classroom, and tiny speech bubbles began to form. Much to James' dismay, it had been too long for the map to memorize what was said.

"This…" Lily bit her lips. "James… isn't this proof… against? That situation looks very dan-"

She cut herself off as another dot came into the scene passing through several walls until it was right beside the couple. Her mouth dropped open. The new dot read 'Nearly Headless Nick.' It appeared as if Remus had fallen asleep, for Sirius and the ghost dot began conversing, slow, quiet bubbles echoing on the map.

Unless Nearly Headless Nick had been a voyeur of the worse variety, there was no doubt that he would've rushed out to warn the teachers the moment things he sensed something wrong. Nothing happened that night.

"We have a witness…" Lily breathed in awe. "James, we could do this. I'm sure we could! With this, we could prove that Sirius Black was innocent!"

Dumbledore lowered his head and sighed. "It's not that simple."

"What do you mean it's not that simple?" Lily demanded. She glanced at James, who stood beside her, stone-faced and brooding. "Aren't you going to say anything? You believed in him, and now we have proof! Sirius couldn't have raped Remus and hid the signs in such a short time, Nick would've seen, and look! The ghost is still there! And the teachers are coming, he was there the whole night!"

"Nothing happened that night," James' voice broke. "And Padfoot- he was framed. And Moony… he… he spent the last seven years thinking that Padfoot hurt him. And I never noticed anything. What kind of a-"

Lily's teeth tightened. "This is ridiculous! The Magistrates would never had allowed this! We'll go first thing in the morning."

"Lily," Dumbledore shook his head.

"…we'll storm into the building and-"

"Lily." The Headmaster's voice was firm.

The young woman took a deep breath. "And nobody can stop me."

"They won't listen," Dumbledore said quietly. "Even if Sirius never hurt Remus, that does not change the fact that he is a Death Eater. He didn't rape Remus, but he _did_ murder over twenty good witches and wizards in the last seven years. He _did_ betray us, and he _did_ change."

"But they forced him to it!" James cried. "The Ministry! They forced him to it! He wouldn't have turned if it wasn't for that! I knew- I _know_ Padfoot, and he would never have joined Voldemort!" He glared at the old man. "You never told me, Albus. You knew about this and never told me."

Dumbledore was quiet for a moment. "When Sirius was first accused, I had my suspicions," he admitted. "But Remus didn't want the news spread, and I could hardly investigate without rumors starting. And the rumors, James, would've hurt your friend more than anything else."

"But still…"

"Anything I said would've made things worse." Dumbledore looked tired, and his voice dropped to a whisper. "You gave me this map a year after Sirius turned, James, I had no proof until then. And now, this could've proved him innocent of one crime, but it would not have helped."

"But what about Remus?" James despaired. "He deserves the truth. He needs to know that Padfoot never hurt him. How could you have hid that from him?"

"It is not me he needs to learn that from," Dumbledore said mildly. "If he ever is to overcome his insecurities, Remus needs to hear that from Sirius himself."

* * *

Remus Lupin was dying of agitation. For more than three weeks, they had dodged the Dark Lord's notice, changing room after room. While Voldemort never actively searched them out or called on Sirius, they were constantly aware of his magic scouring Durmstrang's halls. The Death Eaters had all noticed their Lord's frustration, all becoming jumpy and violent.

Remus could've handled the tension, but other than being afraid and uneasy, the days were _boring_. The most exciting event in the past week was Narcissa sending them pastries. Draco had immediately stolen them and threw them out of the window. Remus was so bored he found that the most amusing thing in the world.

By the time full moon rolled around again, he was a limp sack of misery on the bed, and not even Harry's pleas or Draco's taunts could rouse him.

He sat up when Sirius entered the room, eyes alert again. "What's new?"

Despite what Draco muttered under his breath, he didn't wake because of Sirius, but what news he might've brought. When the man smiled and said, "nothing," he promptly fell back on the bed and drifted off into nothingness again.

He had thought it would be awkward living with Sirius, but surprisingly, the man had backed off after the first few days. Remus had a strong suspicion it was because of Harry, and Draco who had promptly deserted his mother to hide with them. Sirius didn't know how to face James' child. Often, he noticed the man joking with the kids, Draco laughing, and Harry looking wary.

Harry was not like James. He enjoyed the jokes and laughter, but he was neither forgetful nor forgiving when he thought someone had hurt the people he cared about. Remus sighed into the sheets. Harry definitely thought of Sirius as an enemy. He was especially obvious when Sirius had approached Remus the first night, assigning sleeping arrangements with a smirk; Sirius and Remus in one room, Harry and Draco in the other. Harry had listened in silence, then promptly brought his sheets to sleep beside Remus' bed, much to Sirius' alarm and Draco's annoyance.

The next day, Sirius said that it wouldn't work, brought all four beds into the same room and nothing more was said on the subject.

Intense pain shot through up his arms, and Remus gasped, musing cut off. His shoulders were on fire. He jerked upright, arcing his back, and yelped as the pain intensified. The others had immediately noticed.

"Moony?" Sirius was beside him in a flash, one large hand cupped under his elbow to support him. His voice rose in volume. "What's wrong? What's going on?"

Remus leaned forward heavily, voice caught. He knew what was happening… It was almost full moon, and his transformation was arriving earlier than usual.

"Remus!" Harry climbed on the bed, eyes full of worry.

Sirius swore and drew his robe sleeve up past his arm. He paled. "Moony, this is…"

_Fur,_ Remus gritted his teeth. He knew what was on his arm. He jerked away from concerned touches, breathing deeply. Clenching his hands into fists, he felt a sigh of relief as the pain subsided and his skin returned to normal.

"It's fine!" he gasped, as soon as he was able to breath again. "It's fine. It's nothing."

"Don't give me that," Sirius snapped. "What was it?"

Remus smoothed his sleeve and felt defensive. "Full moon, it's tomorrow, isn't it? It happens sometimes, that my transformation will begin early. It's alright, I just need to be away for tonight."

"What?" Harry stammered. "Where will you go? We should be there too, shouldn't we?"

"You wouldn't have it in you to bite us even if you are a wolf," Draco added. "I think it's safe."

"This didn't use to happen," Sirius said slowly, eyes dark and angry. "It was always one night, Moony, I've never heard of early transformations."

"It used to happen a lot," Remus said. "Before… before I met you and Prongs."

Sirius took it the wrong way. For a moment, his eyes remained blank, then angry. "I'll find an empty room, but don't think I'll stay away tonight."

"Sirius, that's not what I meant! I wasn't implying anything!" Sirius wasn't listening. Fuming, he turned away, leaving Remus and the kids in the room.

Just outside the door, Harry caught up with him. "What?" Sirius barked, voice unnecessarily gruff. Swallowing, he tried to calm his anger. "Did you want something?"

Harry looked startled for a moment, before he spoke up. "Tonight, I want to be there too, and so does Draco. We can all stay here, even, I mean, I don't think you have to find the other room."

Sirius was beyond frustrated. He had hoped that he could gradually get closer to Remus over the course of a month, but every time he wanted to approach his mate, Harry was there, concerned and watching. And he couldn't. He didn't want to do anything in front of James' son.

"No, Harry," he said tightly. "That's not possible, especially for you and Draco. You can ask Remus why." Without waiting for an answer, he left, footsteps echoing loudly in the empty hall.

* * *

Igor Karkaroff was not an easy person to find, especially when you needed something from him. Sirius cursed as the man's office door remain closed after several death threats. Swerving, he took the Durmstrang stairs two at once to search the towers.

Halfway there he saw Severus Snape, still as a statue in the hall. His mouth opened to snap, but the dark grimace on the man's face made him pause.

"What do you want, Snivellus?" He sneered. Snape's back was against a window, and the shadows gave him an ominous halo.

"A word, Black," Snape said coolly. "Not with me though. I have nothing to say to you. It's _Dumbledore_ that wants to see you. If you'll follow me, we'll get the unpleasantness over with."

"What would the head of your damned Order want with me?" Sirius asked impatiently. "Don't toy with me. I don't have the time to deal with you."

"Let's just say you both have one common interest," Snape replied. " The welfare of a certain werewolf matters to you, does it not?"

Sirius stiffened. "That's none of your business."

"It is my business if you will need the wolfsbane," Snape said shortly. "And it is my business because, as you well know, Lupin is my ally. Follow me."

Unconsciously, Sirius found himself following. Ducking around a corner, they arrived at a dark room with a fireplace. Methodically, Snape lit the fire and left the room. Sirius shivered as he approached the fire. The hair at the back of his neck stood, and he could imagine the Dark Lord listening in.

"This is stupid," he muttered.

"Not half as stupid as you, Black," a voice retorted. In the flames, James' head rose, an unreadable expression on his face. Without the urgency and Remus' safety on the line, Sirius finally noticed the age in James' eyes. The brightness in them hardened, and his face seemed longer, thinner. Sirius breathed in deeply before he was able to reply.

"Glad to see that your mug is as ugly as ever, Potter," he said. "Or should that be Mr. Evans? We both know who wears the pants in your marriage."

James cracked a grin that didn't reach his eyes. "Very funny."

Silence fell over them for a moment. Sirius swallowed hard to sooth the uneasiness inside him. "Prongs, I've…"

"Me too, Padfoot… all the time…" James nodded. He looked nervous before he continued. "Is… is Harry with you? Is he safe?"

"Yeah," Sirius said. "He's almost as troublesome as you."

"I'm relieved to hear it," James said wryly. "Have you told him yet? That you're his…"

"Am I?" Sirius asked. "I would've thought you changed it. Harry and Moony are so close…"

James shook his head. "No, you're his godfather. There's no way we'd ever change it." He paused. "We told him about you. Actually… Remus did. He said… that Harry had a godfather who went missing. That he loved life… and loved to laugh and flirt…"

Scratching his head, James' voice dropped. "Harry asked me about you, many times. He wanted to meet you."

Sirius felt his voice catch. "James, your son hates me. I… I can't tell him, not now. After all I've done… it's a miracle Remus doesn't hate me."

James was quiet for a moment. "If it changes anything, Padfoot, I've never hated you either. It's… frustrating, but it didn't matter who you killed, what underhanded move you made, you were the same boy I met at Hogwarts. Even when I thought you killed Wormtail, I never once hated you."

Sirius' eyes grew blurry as he nodded. "Thank you James."

"But that's not what we came to talk about right now," James said quickly. "We've wasted too much time already. Listen, we've been keeping tabs on Moony, and Snape knows about the early transformation. He'll take care of it. What we've got to talk about is-"

"Snape?" Sirius said incredulously. "You'd trust _him_? And how… how are you keeping tabs?"

"Padfoot," James said impatiently. "Whether I like it or not, Snape is my ally. And… if you love Remus as much as you claim, he's yours too." He looked away for a moment. "As to how we know, Malfoy junior has been in touch."

"The brat? How come I didn't know any of this?" Sirius frowned.

"Remus put him up to it when you were busy dealing with Voldemort," James smiled. "I nearly fainted when he showed up in my kitchen one morning. Since then, he drops by every few days to inform us. In a way, I'd take him over Snape for a spy."

Sirius felt chills run down his back. He had known that Remus was resourceful, but what James just revealed put into sharp perspective how isolated he was. Compared to Remus… he had always been fighting alone.

"And we came to say is…" James sighed. "There's a choice you have to make, Padfoot. Between Voldemort and Dumbledore, Deatheaters and… well, us. Remus and Harry and Lily and I, we all want you back."

"Forget it, James, the entire wizarding world is after my hide," Sirius said flatly. "And you're forgetting the ministry. Listen, after this, I'll have to go into hiding. That's the only choice left to me."

"But you'd have your friends. I'd have thought that was enough," James looked away. "Anyways, Dumbledore wants to see you. Take care, Padfoot."

"Yeah," Sirius whispered. "You too, Prongs."

The fire flickered, and this time, it was the face of a man Sirius had mixed feelings towards. Licking his lips, Sirius felt ridiculously nervous. Despite all the rumors that claimed Dumbledore to be as powerful as the Dark Lord, to Sirius, there was something mysterious in Dumbledore's powers. Voldemort could not compare.

"Mr. Black," Dumbledore said simply. "I want you to leave Voldemort's side. Is that acceptable?"

Sirius felt his face harden. "Do you have any idea who you are speaking to, old man?"

"Of course," Dumbledore replied, spectacles gleaming coolly. "You are Sirius Black, Voldemort's top Death Eater, best friend of _my_ best man, and my most troublesome student." His voice softened. "But Sirius, none of that should matter as much as this; you are the man Remus Lupin loves."

Sirius felt his anger melt away. Dumbledore took this as a sign and continued.

"In three days, the Order will launch an all-out attack on Durmstrang. Our plan relies on utmost secrecy, and if this news is leaked out, it could mean the end of the Order."

"Then why are you telling me this?" Sirius demanded. "Have you lost your mind?! I am a Death Eater!"

"I'm sorry we can't give you more time," Dumbledore said gently. "But Sirius, if there ever was a time to question your allegiance, it is now. To tell Voldemort, or keep it a secret… it is entirely up to you. If you tell them, James will most likely die during the attack, as will countles other aurors. If you keep our secret, you will betray your Lord."

"You manipulative bastard," Sirius whispered. "Telling me this now, you know I have no choice! You're using my feelings for Remus, my friendship with James, for your own sick schemes!"

"And for that, I apologize," Dumbledore said easily. "Voldemort and I are more alike than I'd like to think. Hear this though, I care for Remus, James, and surprisingly, you too. For every white hair I get from planning for the Order, I get another two pondering your futures. Now… do you have any more accusations for me?"

Sirius had none. Slowly, he sat down before the fireplace, feeling smaller and younger, as if he was still the student and Dumbledore still his Headmaster.

"You said Remus loves me," Sirius said softly. "How do you know?"

"If nothing else, he went to Durmstrang with you. That decision was harder than you might've thought. Remus gave everything for the Order. He takes his duties more seriously than his own life. That day was… the first time he had been selfish."

"If…" Sirius licked his lips. "If I love him and he loves me, why doesn't it work? Professor, I've… been thinking for a long time, but why can't I-" Blood bounded in his ears. Frustration bubbled up his throat. "Why can't I get it to work?! I've got the second chance I wanted. Why am I still screwing up? How did James get it to work?"

"James picked an easy person to love," Dumbledore replied simply. "Lily loves and accepts love easily. Remus is different. He loves easily, but when it comes to receiving affection, he is lacking. You, however, need to reevaluate your method of giving love."

"What I-"

Abruptly, Dumbledore's voice became fierce. "Think, what have you done for Remus in the last decade? You've broken his heart every time you killed. You drove him mad with guilt, made him think it was his fault you turned traitor. You made yourself different from the boy he fell in love with. You've made him neglect his duty, endangering all of the Wizarding world. You made him think he loved the wrong man."

Sirius sat stunned. Never in his life had he seen the old wizard so angry. The fire reared up, engulfing the entire fireplace in heat and loud cracks. Dumbledore exhaled a long breath.

"Now Sirius," his voice was kind. "Think of what you've done for him. Think of what he's done for you. Tell me why your relationship wasn't working."

"What should I do?" Sirius' voice cracked.

"I have waited seven years for you to ask me that question." Dumbledore said softly. "My answer is. Think about what Remus wants. If you don't know, then find out. For once, think of what he wants before you think of yourself."

Remus' smile flashed before Sirius' eyes. His soft, haunting voice and glowing eyes. The dip of tawny hair against his neck and how his nose wrinkled slightly when Sirius did something wrong.

"Thank you," Sirius whispered. "I have made up my mind."

"And?"

"I will leave Voldemort's ranks. I will formally say farewell to him today, and I will leave with you in three days."

Dumbledore frowned. "Say farewell? Sirius, that is not wise."

"I have served him for seven years," Sirius stood. "I owe him that much."

"Sirius," Dumbledore was alarmed. "Listen to me, don't go. Do not confront him alone. You underestimate his cruelty. Nothing good can come of this! If you must confront him, wait until we are there with you."

Sirius spread his hands. The Dark Mark burned on his arm. There was a hollowness in his heart. "You don't understand, Professor. I am tied to him. As long as his mark remains on my arm, I am his creature and will never truly shake him. It must be done."

"We will find another way," Dumbledore insisted. "Don't go."

"What other way?" Sirius asked, voice hard. "If he wanted to, the Dark Mark will spread a black fever in my blood and I will die. The moment you attack, and he finds out what I've hidden from him, he will kill me. I'll end it on my own terms if I must." He looked Dumbledore in the eyes and spoke very slowly. "And I'm not planning on dying."

"_I_ will find a way, Sirius, don't you trust me?" Dumbledore's voice was tight.

"I can't listen to you this time," Sirius swallowed. "I know it is dangerous, but it… I can see Remus' eyes when I tell him I've taken off the Dark Mark. And it's… so beautiful. I have to do this."

Without hearing Dumbledore's last words, Sirius stormed from the room, slamming the door behind him, startling a young Death Eater who quickly bowed and fled. Straightening his back, he felt Voldemort's aura brush through the halls once more.

This time, he didn't hide. Steeling his nerves, Sirius marched towards Voldemort's quarters.

* * *

"I don't know how to thank you, Severus," Remus sighed. "I don't know where Sirius is, and there's nobody else I'd trust. I can't stay in the office with Harry and Draco. I… don't know what I'd do."

"I'll keep an eye on the brats," Snape sighed. A simmering cup of wolfsbane sat on the cramped office desk. The shelves had been shoved against the corner. The long curtains on the window was closed. "Lock my office from the inside. I will not be back tonight."

"Thank you," Remus repeated. Licking his lips nervously. "If the boys give you trouble, feel free to-"

"Don't need your permission for that," Snape smiled darkly. "They'll wish they didn't cross me."

Remus smiled a soft smile, unaware of Snape's stare. Nodding to the taller man, he slipped into Snape's office and the door clicked shut. It was a moment before Snape shook himself. The hallway was dark around him, and the whispers of gargoyles on the walls hissed through the shadows. Snape pasted the sneer back on his face before leaving.

Long before he entered the hidden office, he could hear the boys arguing. Snape sighed and rubbed his temple.

"Draco, calm down."

"I am calm!" Draco snapped. "Did you see what Lupin just did? He left us! With no explanation or anything! We've been abandoned again."

"No! Remus wouldn't do that!" Harry's voice rose. "Take that back! He's just worried about us, I know it!"

Snape slammed the doors open, voice low. "Silence!"

Draco and Harry's mouths snapped shut. Their eyes were wide as Snape strode into the office. Dark cloak swept around him like the closed wings of a bat. His eyes flashed. "Brainless brats! Do you have any idea how much danger you were in? Have you no sense?! Half the castle could've heard you!"

"You- you're the man that took Remus away," Harry swallowed.

"Severus Snape," Draco stepped closer to Harry, frowning. "What do you want."

"Some common sense out of both of you," Snape growled, slamming the door behind him. Darkness fell over the room. Harry felt his breath catch as he trembled. When Snape caught his eyes, dark gaze filled with hatred and contempt, he clenched his fists and tried to stare back. "I could've killed the both of you the moment I came in."

"But you didn't," Harry said. "Did Remus send you?"

"Nobody sent me, foolish boy," Snape took off his cloak and hung it on the door knob. "Least of all the werewolf."

"So then?" Draco snapped. "Was it mother? You haven't answered, what do you want?"

"To sleep," Snape said gruffly. "So go prance outside if you want, but if I hear one sound out of either of you and you disturb me, I'll make you wish you'd never been born." Harry's eyes widened as Snape stepped towards them, tall and menacing. "Do I make myself clear?"

Harry nodded. Draco looked about to retort before Harry smacked his shoulder.

With a huff, Snape turned and sank into the nearest bed. Draco's eyes widened. "Hey," he protested. "That's my-"

"Shut up, Draco," Harry hissed, clamping a hand around the other boy's mouth. "I saw it. He hates us. He'll really kill us if you make him mad."

"No he doesn't," Draco whispered back. "I didn't see anything. Besides, that's _my_ bed he's on! Where am I going to sleep, huh?"

It occurred to Harry that maybe Snape disliked only him. He wasn't sure if that was comforting. "Well he hates me then. Don't disturb him!"

Draco's eyes narrowed. "I share your bed then."

Harry's mouth dropped open. "No! Why should you get mine? Why not Remus'?"

"Because I said so!"

"That's mean! You never share, so why should I?!"

"Because I-"

"SILENCE!" Snape roared. He sat up, wand drawn and glowing. His face lit with fury. "What did I say about the SHOUTING?!"

The boys scampered under Harry's bed and hid for the rest of the night.

* * *

"I never suspected that you would be the one to seek me out, Sirius," Voldemort smiled amiably. His office had changed colors again, now a deep, deep black. Sirius was almost dizzy when he opened the door. In the far corners, he couldn't tell where the floor ended and the walls began, or if the ceiling was a dome or flat.

"That makes two of us, my Lord, I didn't think I'd seek you out either," Sirius grinned. Heart pounding, he stepped forward and sank into the chairs, black cushions and white handles. Voldemort's hair melted into the background. Black robes made him one with the shadows.

"So tell me, Sirius," Voldemort looked him up and down. "Why shouldn't I kill you on the spot?"

"Because you could've done it any time in the last month and you didn't," Sirius leaned forward. "Because maybe, you want to hear what I have to say."

"Do I?" Voldemort's voice was silky. "So… what do you have to say?"

"The…" Sirius swallowed hard. "The situation has changed my lord. I… I've been thinking about a lot of things this past month. About my duties to you, to my fellow Death Eaters, and my mate. I- I don't think… I can keep up with both anymore."

"You want me to release you from my service," Voldemort said flatly. "Isn't that right?"

"I am sorry, my Lord," Sirius bowed his head. "You have helped me when I needed help the most. When I first graduated from Hogwarts, I had nothing. No friends, no power, no hope… All I had was my rage and you saved me. I'm so sorry. I can't help you anymore, my Lord."

"Sirius," Voldemort stood, looking off into the darkness of the room. One single candle flickered. "You have served me many years and you know my ways. Do you know what happens to traitors like you? Have you ever seen me forgive anyone?"

Sirius shook his head. "I know. I've killed many in your name, remember? Spies, traitors, those who have failed you. I know what happens."

Voldemort grunted. "I thought you were a man of your word, Sirius. I gave you your moonchild. You swore that if I gave him to you, you would serve me. You lied."

"I made another promise long before I met you, my Lord," Sirius stood too. "I swore to myself I'd make Remus happy. Whatever it took, I'd be the one next to him. I swore that he would be mine, and I'd be the best thing that ever happened to him. It seems I can't keep all of my promises."

"When we squash the Ministry, and stamp out the rest of Dumbledore's pathetic resistance, you'll have time to worry about your pretty little pet," Voldemort snarled. "Fool! There is no turning back for you! To them, you are already a murderer, a traitor, an enemy! You think there is any chance of survival without me? You're a fool!"

The calm Dark Lord was gone. Eyes wild with anger, Sirius had to clench his fists to stand his ground. Power bubbled out of Voldemort like a boiled cauldron, hot and dark. Sirius couldn't breathe. His chest heaved as the Dark Lord strode around the table and came closer.

_Think of Moony,_ Sirius told himself. As bright eyes and an excited, breathless voice passed through his mind, his eyes softened. "You don't understand, my Lord," he said. "Even if I can't survive… it's worth it. Maybe it's because you haven't met anyone yet. Remus… he's worth it. He's worth anything I have to give. Everything I have to give up."

The Dark Lord stared at Sirius for a moment, suppressing his power with difficulty. "Then it has come down to this."

"Yes, my lord. I will fight you," Sirius said tersely. "That's what you told us when we joined you. If we wish to leave your ranks, we must defeat you in a fight. We can name any place, any time, and any method. That is what you said."

"Yes, Sirius, those were my words," Voldemort said softly, eyes narrowing into slits. "And do you think you can defeat me now? I am twice your age with twice your power. Only your old Dumbledore could ever hope to match me. And you dare challenge me."

"I must," Sirius stood, fist tightening around his wand. "That's the only choice I have. I must fight you, and I must win."

"Then name your time, your place, and how you wish to fight." Voldemort's eyes closed for a moment, hands reaching into his robe picket for his own wand. The dark amusement in his eyes caused Sirius' throat to clog.

"We'll fight right here," Sirius said hoarsely. "We'll use any and all of our magical abilities. And for the time…" His eyes glowed briefly. "Our fight has started the moment I entered your office."

With a flick from his wand, Sirius extinguished every light in the room.

The Dark Lord struck, without an incantation, without warning. Bright green danced across the room. Sirius didn't move, a trademark smirk tugging at his lips as the spell hit him and he fell. His eyes glazed and the black of his hair and robes disappeared upon the black floor. For a moment, his magical signature vanished.

"Black," Voldemort growled. From where Sirius' body fell, a giant wolf sprang, moving faster than Voldemort's eyes could follow. Its fur was as black as the room and the night, and for a moment, Voldemort could not see anything but sharp gray wolf eyes glowing in the darkness.

He struck at the wolf, but it had somehow circled behind him, long claws digging into his shoulders, long teeth reaching for his neck.

"Avada Kedavra!" Voldemort shouted, wand pointed behind him and into the wolf's ribs. There was a high pitched whine as the weight lifted off his shoulders, and the room was silent.

The Dark Lord paused for a moment, heart pounding, as he searched for signs of life. Before his breath could catch, however, a wand dug into his neck, and a hurried, whispered spell passed through him. "Necrimos."

Another wizard's hand was on his wand, and Voldemort felt magic flow from him, draining into thin air. Warm blood dripped onto his back as a wounded Sirius Black seized his arm.

"The dog was an illusion," Sirius panted, wand deep enough in Voldemort's neck to draw blood. "Because I was right, my lord. You _can't_ see in the dark. I can. And I can cast faster than anyone I know. And Remus told me you know next to _nothing_ about werewolves. Did you actually think we could change shapes at will?"

Voldemort said nothing.

"Admit that you lost," Sirius breathed with difficulty. "Admit it, or I'll kill you right here."

Slowly, Voldemort nodded. Sighing in relief, Sirius released him, backing up several steps and pressed a hand to his ribs, where Voldemort's first blow had cracked several ribs.

Stumbling back, Sirius collapsed in the nearest chair and his face lost color. He blinked several times before fixing his gaze on Voldemort. "My lord," he rasped. "The Dark Mark. Please remove it."

"Why should I?"

Sirius sat up in alarm, hissing in pain. "My lord! You gave your word! You told all of us! We are free if we defeat you!"

"Are you suggesting that you alone, are allowed to break promises?" Voldemort said mildly. "That you can break your promise to me so easily, and I cannot do the same?"

"It was not easy!" Sirius burst out.

"You may leave," Voldemort said, eyes cold and deep and black as the room around him. "Go on, nobody's stopping you. Go live what life you have left with him. You sicken me."

"You're letting me go?" Sirius asked incredulously. "My Lord, you are letting me leave?"

Voldemort said nothing. Sirius shifted nervously. "Thank you, my Lord. I'm sure Remus will step down from Dumbledore's side too. You will not hear from us again."

Turning, Sirius headed for the door. When his fingers closed around the knob, Voldemort spoke, "You have until midnight, Sirius."

Sirius froze and breath caught in his throat. A dull ache spread from his Dark Mark. "What?"

"I never said I would release you," Voldemort said icily. "Starting now, my mark will slowly eat you up from the inside. I estimate it'll kill you by midnight tonight. Turn around Sirius, it is not too late to repent."

Sirius turned. "I thought this would happen, my Lord," he said softly. "But you're wrong. It's already too late. It was too late the moment I saw Remus Lupin by the train station in first year Hogwarts."

"What about your werewolf mate?" Voldemort asked silkily. "Aren't you afraid of what might happen to him after you die?"

Sirius bowed. "Please release him, my Lord," he said. "I believe you'll do it, because…" Sirius smiled a little. "I think, deep down, you're still the man who once saved me. The man I once admired."

Voldemort's knuckles were white against the tabletop. "Enjoy your time with the werewolf then," he sneered. "I guess you'll never know."

Sirius left Voldemort's office with his head high and his steps confident. However, the heat of fever already rose towards his face.

* * *

Remus slowly pushed Snape's shelves against the wall, wooden backs towards him. He removed his shirt and pants, folding them neatly under the bed, before dropping to his side on the ground, curling in fetal position.

"Sirius isn't back yet," he wondered. "What happened to him?" Anxiety reared within him, but Remus quickly shut his mind to dark thoughts and closed his eyes. An unbearable itch spread up his arms, and he felt his ankles begin to change.

Early transformations were never complete. For hours at a time, he would be caught between the form of a man and a wolf, feeling every misplaced bone, the itch of hair spreading across skin, and the dull ache through his skull. Dumbledore once told him that the early transformations were brought about by stress and dark thoughts. Remus supposed he shouldn't have been surprised that it happened now.

Hours later, frantic poundings woke him from a hazy dream of pain. Remus sat up, half-formed tail clenching in protest. He sniffed the air and a single thought streaked through his mind.

Sirius.

Scrambling, Remus clawed to his feet, bent legs collapsing under him. Growling, he grabbed the table-edge and sagged against the wall, limping for the door.

"Sirius!" he gasped. Curved hands clenched the knob, drawing the door open. "Sirius!"

The black haired wizard leaned heavily against the door, a forced smile on his pale face. His breathing was labored. Fingers trembling, he reached for Remus' face. "Moony," he whispered. "Moony…"

"Merlin," Remus said, dismayed. "What happened to you? What's wrong?"

Sirius brought their faces together until their foreheads touched. "Moony… I'm so sorry," he whispered. "I didn't realize, Moony. And you never knew. I do love you. I love you in the way that you always wanted me to. I'm sorry if I never showed it."

"I don't understand," Remus breathed in Sirius' scent. The familiar scent of the sea was mixed with yellow mould. Of decay and spoiled food. "Pad… Padfoot, you smell terrible. What… Don't scare me like this, Padfoot…" Straining, he pulled the larger man into the room and closed the door.

As Remus helped his mate to the bed, the moonlight finally lit his face and stumbled back. Sirius' face was covered with sweat, slicked down his hair and his lips were pale. The sick man closed his eyes briefly before looking at Remus, pupils clouding.

"Merlin," Remus choked, stumbling towards the shelves. His heart sped, and pain delve against his tail bone. He kicked a stool into place and, ignoring his bent legs, clambered on top to reach for Snape's potions.

"Wyrmwood," Remus gritted his teeth, eyes stinging. "Sev said he had them! Damn him!" He found the potion stacked between two giant texts and grabbed it with his left hand. His right was no longer functional, claws and glittering fur deforming his fingers into paws.

Remus nearly screamed as his lower body twisted and he fell off the stool, furless tail twitching in pain. He crawled towards the bed, where Sirius was attempting to sit up.

"Moony, you-" Sirius stammered, horrified.

"Shut up!" Remus pressed the bare skin of his left arm to his face, hating his deformed body. He couldn't meet Sirius' eyes as he collapsed against the bed, his hair graying and stretching towards his face. "You're burning up, so this… take a bit of this. I'll get a wet towel and-"

Sirius grabbed his wrist before he could leave. A gentle hand twisted Remus' face into the light. "I love you, Moony," he whispered, pulling Remus onto the bed. "And I'm sorry… so sorry it had to turn out like this."

Remus relaxed in Sirius' arms. The fur receded into tawny hair and his legs snapped back into place. The tail vanished as Remus wrapped two human arms around his mate. "What do you mean, Padfoot?"

"I-" Sirius swallowed. "I wanted to give you so much. I couldn't stand your loneliness, your depression, your misery. I wanted to… I wanted to give you what you gave me. And I failed every time."

"I didn't give you anything," Remus felt tears.

Sirius laughed softly against Remus' neck. "You gave me everything, silly. Ever since first year, you filled my life. You let me laugh, Moony, you taught me everything I knew about friendship, about love. And that's why… I needed to protect you, and I needed to love you."

"I don't understand, Padfoot," Remus squeezed hard and buried his words into Sirius' shoulder. His chest felt unbearably tight, and the warm scent of Sirius' love surrounded him. "Why are you saying this?"

"Because," Sirius whispered. "I don't think… I won't be able to give you happiness, Remus. And I hate myself. I'm so sorry. I never should've… but I just… I just missed you so much and…"

"I don't care," Remus pushed away so he could peer into Sirius' eyes. "I've been… so preoccupied with whether you truly loved me or not that I… I've forgotten something much more important."

Gently, Remus pushed hair back from Sirius' face and leaned in to whisper against his lips. His ten fingers were completely human. "It doesn't matter whether you love me or not. Nothing should matter as much as this; I love you."

A single tear slid down Sirius' face. He wanted to look away, but Remus' eyes were brighter than the night, golden and haunting. They took over his world, stretching to take his pain. Color filled his face, and his mind cleared. He swallowed. "I can't… I can't give you what you want, Moony."

"I love you," Remus said softly. "And I don't care. I'll take whatever you can give. And I promise you… I'll never forget that again."

Sirius' breath caught in his throat. Slowly, he took Remus' hands and brought him closer. "Will you-" he began hoarsely. "Will you take this?"

Eyes misty, Remus nodded. His breath trembled as he brought his face towards Sirius' bare neck. "Padfoot?"

"Yeah?"

"I have just one question," Remus closed his eyes tightly. "The first time… did I like it? I don't remember…"

Sirius smiled painfully. "I was a wolf that night too. I don't remember any more than you."

"Not that time, Padfoot," Remus whispered. "Seventh year… Christmas night. In that classroom… when I wanted you to stop and you didn't… I- I'm not mad anymore. I just wanted an apology. And I just wanted to know."

Cold swept down Sirius' spine, and his mind was suddenly clear. "Moony… what do you mean? You thought I… you thought I would…"

Remus blinked, confused. "What?"

He was suddenly on his back, with Sirius pressing down on him, face far too close and their chests touching. Remus' mind blanked as Sirius met his gaze, gray eyes impossibly clear and sharp.

* * *

LEMON!!!!!! DON'T READ IF YOU ARE UNDERAGED OR UNCOMFORTABLE!!!!!!! MAYBE BEYOND M-RATING

* * *

"Nothing happened that night, Moony," Sirius said intensely. "I don't know what came over me that night, but I stopped. I would never… I would never hurt you like that."

"But-" Remus yelped as Sirius pressed a hand against his chest, warm fingers trailing downwards. His breath quickened as Sirius' other hand slid up from his inner thigh. He shut his eyes briefly.

"You'd remember," Sirius said desperately. "You'd remember if I touched you. I didn't. I kissed you and I- I didn't let you leave. But you'd remember if I touched you like this."

Long fingers ghosted across his privates, and Remus bit his lips. Sirius descended against his chest, tongue swirling against goose bumped skin. "Who told you that?" he asked, lips brushing Remus' nipples. "And you just believed them…"

"I didn't know what to think!" Remus cried. "You scared me that night. And stop that! I need to… I need to think."

Sirius stopped, lifting himself onto his elbows, warm breath mingling with Remus'. His eyes were sad. "I would wait for you forever, Moony, but I… I don't have much time. Do you want this? This is… what I want to give you, before…"

"Not much time?" Remus echoed. The weight he had carried for more than seven years lifted at Sirius' words, but a new weight settled in. "Padfoot, you're hidin-"

"Do you want this?" Sirius demanded, feeling dizziness overtake him.

"Yes!" Remus shouted. He wiped his nose angrily, reached up and pulled Sirius down by his loose hair. "I want this," he whispered, eyes unflinching. "I want this more than I've ever wanted anything in the world." He took a deep breath. "And I trust you. I believe you. I just didn't know. If you say it never happened… I believe you."

Sirius winced at his hair, but slowly leaned in again, drawing close to Remus' lips. "Thank you. I'll give you all of me."

They kissed, tongues dancing, lips pressing against each other, as close as they could get. Sirius' fingers settled between his legs, surrounding him, stroking him. Remus felt Sirius' own hardness against his inner thigh as he pulled Sirius closer, so their chests melded.

Remus broke through the kiss with a gasp as Sirius pressed a finger into him from behind. It wasn't painful. Not compared to full moon. But the intrusion sent a blast of heat into his groin. Remus flushed deeply as he felt Sirius smirk against his lips.

"Tell me," Sirius' voice was hoarse. "Tell me no and I will stop. I'll stop even if it kills me."

"No," Remus pressed his mouth against Sirius' neck. "Go on. Seventh year didn't happen. The wolf thing didn't happen. This is the first time. This is the time I'll always remember. I love you." The finger moved inside him, sliding deeper. Remus gasped and twitched, clinging tightly to Sirius' shoulder.

He had never felt so exposed, as Sirius surrounded him and worked inside him. Warm hands around his erect length, shuffling his sacs. Another finger entered him and spread wide. He kissed Sirius as hard as he could, but his head was light and his fingers had no strength.

As Sirius withdrew his fingers, Remus found his mind again, readjusting his tense arms and relaxing into Sirius' warmth. They kissed again. Gentle, warm seas… Then Sirius' hardness was against him, slowly pressing in. His entrance objected, and pain shot up.

Remus cried out and Sirius stopped. They hovered for a moment, Remus struggled to breath, hanging between pain and unbelievable ecstasy, taking him away. Sirius was breathing hard, eyes shut tightly. When he finally opened his eyes, there was a question in his stormy pupils. "I'm ready," Remus gasped. "It's fine."

When Sirius sheathed himself Remus saw light. Bright light sliding off warm, loud waves. Deafening, suffocating, a little painful… But he never wanted to leave, wanting to bask in the beauty of the sea, the warmth, the scent of the ocean… He groped for the man he loved, pressing close, letting the sea and the heat surround him. His mouth was moving but Remus did not know what he said.

Then Sirius' length pressed against something inside him. And Sirius took him higher.

Sirius wept as he made love to Remus. Plunging into a sky full of sunlight. Remus' eyes, half hooded, was fixed on his. Hair softer and fuller than he had remembered. This Remus was no longer a ghost. And Sirius had never felt so complete.

Remus was warmer than the sun, and shone brighter than the moon. He could not get close enough, reaching as far into Remus as he could, pressing himself against heated skin, to tingling laughter and light.

"I love…" he wept. He wasn't close enough. He wanted to melt into this moment and never leave. Remus was crying _Padfoot_,choked and flushed, but there was light in his hooded eyes.

Sirius didn't know how long he clung to that warmth, tears welling and calling Remus' name. Slowly, the night came back to him. Remus dozed off, flushed face slowly recovering and eyes closed. He was smiling.

Sirius pulled out, spent and angry and weak.

* * *

End of Lemon. It is now safe to read.

* * *

"Moony," he sobbed. He pressed a hand hard against his face. He was the happiest man in the world. He was in love with the most beautiful creature, and was loved in return. He would regret nothing.

"How many people," he swallowed. "How many people would never find love. Would never feel so warm. Would never hear that voice. And never see those eyes…" He buried his face into his hands as he sat up.

_You are not unhappy, Padfoot,_ Sirius told himself. He wasn't. But…

He turned to the sleeping Remus, and the smile that spread on his face was painful, but he couldn't stop smiling.

"I wanted to give you the world," he said softly. Carefully, he lowered himself so he was only inches from Remus' face. Fingers trembling, he touched Remus' warm face, thumb tracing his chin, then his lips. "I wanted to make you feel loved and beautiful and wanted. I wanted to give you somewhere… where everyone could love you. Where they can see what I see, and love you the way I love you."

Sirius paused, brushing his swollen lips against Remus'. "Alright, not everyone. And not the way I love you."

Sirius settled, thighs pressing together. Remus' arms went around him in his sleep, and Sirius tucked himself as close as he could, watching Remus' eyes and mouth and nose and soft hair. He closed his own eyes. "I gave you all of me, Moony. It's the best thing I've ever done. And… and I think… when you think back, you'll feel… the same warmth I feel now. You'll know I love you, forever and with all of me. That's good enough. That's good enough for me."

Snape would protect Remus. The Order will save him. Remus would take Harry and Draco with him. Maybe Wormtail too. And they'll meet Prongs and Lily together in the fields at Hogwards. Dumbledore will be there. And Remus will be smiling again.

Sirius smiled, his tears drying. He saw everyone he loved gather at Hogwarts, the starry ceiling above, the shining lake before them. The wind. The sun. The moon and Remus laughing his shy, golden laugh. And Remus will carry him back there. This warmth…

He had given Moony this warmth. As Sirius slept, he was smiling. His heartbeat slowed as the fever returned. As his breaths grew softer and his heart stilled, he was warm.

* * *

Author's Note:

I repeat: Sirius is NOT dead! And he WILL NOT die!

I'm so sorry for the long break. School and work gets in the way a lot, and if I was scraping by in high school, I'd definitely hanging on by my teeth now. And since I can't get my hands on scholarships, I'm really quite panicked right now. But that's not an excuse. I should've updated more often, and I'm very sorry.

The lemon was… I cried while I was writing it, but I don't know if it was emotional enough. If it was too vulgar (I hope not, I tried to keep that to a minimum and focus on the emotions), please email or inform me so I can fix it. I'd really rather not lose all your wonderful reviews if I have to repost this story.

Thank you so much for everyone who stuck with me. I am so touched. And I once again apologize and say: I have not abandoned this story. And unless I'm hit by a bus and dies, I will finish it. Thank you guys!

This chapter is unedited. So if there are a lot of mistakes, I'm very sorry. It's just… after so long, it would kill me to take another hour or two to correct everything. So bear with me.

If I missed anyone in the reviews, I apologize. I'm brainless and cannot check dates. Heh.

As usual, suggestions would be wonderful! And please review, if you've stuck with this story still, after so long.

Emi: Who did not review, but I love her anyways. We haven't talked, but if you're still reading. We should get back in contact… I feel a bit bad. Yeah… anyways.

bluudyrabbitofportland: Whew, your name is a handful to type. I must say your final review finally got me to come back and finish the Voldie-Sirius fight scene, which was the one part I was stuck on. Thank you so much! And yes, it's been more than a year, but I hope this update makes up for it.

aclytie: I haven't abandoned it! I'll continue both of my fics. And eventually, I'll get around to the sequel of this, which is a stand-alone, and you won't be hanging on this one. So thank you so much for your recs! If you're perverse for liking the torture scenes, I'm far worse, for writing them. Sirius is not dark or evil in this chapter, but I hope he's still lovable. huggles

Rissabby: Aw… I'm so sorry about that. I'm definitely not abandoning this story. And I'm continuing writing in some of my classes, so hopefully, I've improved a little. (Or maybe I've gotten boring, since they're all academic fictions… sigh…) Thank you for all your reviews. I've personally always preferred Sirius as the dominant one in the relationship, but it's such a personal preference, and I dislike a wimpy Remus more than anything. Hm… 'yaoi' is Japanese for mature sexual relationship between two men, and 'lemon' is graphic sex (as I put at the beginning) and 'lime' is moderate sex.

Rosemary's Granddaughter: Bwahahahahaha! Thank you so much! I hope my fic acted as medicine for your cold/sickness thing. If not, hands over hot soup and blankie I'm glad the characters are believable, and they're just going to be even more OOC the more JK. Rowling writes… is unhappy

Trista: Heh… thanks so much for your compliments. I was so touched and guilty after your review. It haunted me. Gah! I'm definitely still writing, but it's hard to find time, sit down and write for a good afternoon (or many afternoons), which is what it would take, since I'm an extremely slow writer.

Emma Lupin: Yay! Emma's still reading too! I definitely won't abandon. I'll come back from the dead just when you've all thought I died. Muaahahahaha! Dark/Dominant Sirius is sexy… and not in this chapter. I figure… I want him to be slightly vulnerable for the first time. Because… it had to be special for Remus too, right? And while he'd secretly like overpowering Sirius… (shifty eyes), this was what it ended up being.

Ice Dragon3: Near future… is relative. I'd say I… updated… alright, alright… extremely slowly. Your review was so nice! Thank you for the constructive criticism. The fragment sentences is a problem I have. Sometimes it's stylistic, and sometimes it just makes me look like a duck. O.o… I'm glad you liked the details, since it's hard to use Rowling's details in a story that's quite different than hers. I hope you continue reading, even if it takes me a long time to update (like… 9 months… sigh)

Chickleaf: Reminds me of Chikorita from pokemon! That was the cutest thing ever. Thanks for reviewing!

jka1: Well, I haven't updated soon, but I hope you will give this story another chance. Thank you !

GreenMeansGo: Love your name. Yeah… I've stumbled into some really weird things in fan fiction, and always found other people's warnings helpful. So I thought I could pass it on. This chapter really needed it. Thank you!

Jay: Aw… thank you! I don't mind the plot… it's the writing I don't always like in my stories. I'm flattered you like my story, and I hope the drama makes up for the author's laziness (cough… I know… I suck…). There's definitely so much for me to improve on! But I'm encouraged by you and all my reviewers. So I'm eternally grateful.

liah: I've read the one on fan The other one I read after seeing your review, and I really liked them both! Thanks for sharing. It's always nice to read good author's works. It gives me the strength to go on! Hahaha!

DrOwNiNg In EbOnY: I just love your little clips every time! They warm my heart and gives me naughty thoughts. I hope this lemon was satisfactory. It's not angry/domineering sex. But I never wanted their first time to be that way anyway. (shifty eyes) There's plenty of time for that later, right Remus? (nudge, nudge, and Remus flees!) Muahahahaha. Pity we won't see much of little Draco in action in this fic (wags eyebrows)

Amurila: You love the OOC? Yay! That's always good. As long as you don't look at them and think… 'that's not Sirius, or Remus, they'd never be that mushy/in love'… cuz it's hard to make them intimate when they weren't (that we know of) in the books.

LilacPixie: Thank you so much! Hookage is good. Unless I've totally lost everyone by my non-updating… (sad face)

Mika an S/R Devote: I've read Lady Jaida's stuff before. She actually inspired me to finally write one of the chapters, I can't remember which one though. I haven't read the other one, about the marauders. Thanks for the recs! They're not for light reading, obviously, but they're beautiful (sniffs).

acr: My other fic is harry-centric… (shameless advertising) But I'm glad you liked it, and hopefully, you'll bear with my long absences.

varda101: You're wonderful at reviewing! Your review got me smiling for an entire day! I love all of Rowling's characters and had to focus on so many of them! Thank you, my classmates have told me that I'm stronger at characterization than anything else, so I sure hope they were able to touch you.

MY MInD: This story is back from the dead after more than a year! It will always be back to haunt you! Ha! Aw… I always found Remus to be the cutest character in the series. (hugs)

FlamencoPenguin: Gah! (Ducks from faithful reviewers in shame). I'm so, so, so sorry. I know I'm horrible. Hopefully Sirius stopped being a bastard in this chapter, cuz he touched me in this chapter (kinda weird since I'm the writer). All your lovely compliments were in vain, and it took even longer… I'm so ashamed. I bow to you.

Nightmare-chan22: Oh my reviewers! I grovel! It's finally an update and there isn't even any aggressive Sirius in it! Just… nice, sweet, Sirius. There's a slight dark spot there… somewhere. But I thought it was sweet overall. But no worries! Soon (relatively) the scary, sexy Sirius will be back!

Lotten: XD Remus God! We must all worship the Remus god instead! And the Rowling All-powerful-Overseer of the gods! Me? I'm a puny ant, and Sirius God will crush me under his heels. Thanks for the review! It boosted my ego several billion notches, and made my day. I know I'm too shameless for my own good. Sigh…

Lady Geuna: You certainly had to wait a long time. At least there wasn't a cliffy in the last chapter. James is a saint in my story… unfortunately, since it was before I found out his evil-esque side. I will try to make him evil, but it won't work. Yup! Draco's the biggest little brat there is. The mirror thing was just to make him look cool. I always thought the Draco in the books was a bit narcissistic, and what do those people like? Mirrors! Seriously, if Narcissis had a mirror, he would've lived a whole lot longer.

L Lives: You shouldn't be proud of me, I'm a horrible, horrible writer who never updates. I'm eagerly waiting for the last book, where I hope all my Harry-love will come back. But I just know I'll be crushed with a sad ending… (weeps)

marauders4: 4 eva! Keep reviewing! I'll forgive you because I'm far worse, when it comes to updating. Thank you for reading and the review!

ora-shini-gi: Ironically, this lemon is probably not as hot as the molesting scene from last chapter. But hey, hopefully, it was sweet and loving and emotional. Hahaha! I will slowly turn you into a draco/harry fan! One little chapter in a blue moon at a time.

blackfleetfoot: Aw… it'll never be a tragedy! So don't worry about the titles! I just like to be over dramatic, melodramatic, whatever you call it. And flaunt my writerly words.

Scarlet Schizo: Harry will forever, in my eyes, be the girl in the relationship. He will NEVER flip! Gawhahaha! You are doomed, Harry! And Remus too, I thus name you… the mother! And Draco, you need to grow up before you get any loving. Sirius is the only one who shall have what he wants (coughRemuscough)

Sunflower Seeds: Shh! I'm crazy too, don't tell anyone! And reading standing up takes calories, so I could never do that. My sister already knows I'm insane, but I blackmailed her into silence! You should try that!

EsScaper: Reread anything, everything! I'm glad you're stills ticking to the story. Draco and Remus are already hopelessly locked in the mother-son relationship! Ha! Next is Harry and Sirius. Be afraid! Be very afraid! Draco isn't going to be a bad guy in this story, as you can probably tell. Yeah, SirixRem 'real' first time isn't non-con at all. Which would be kinda bad, if you think about it. What a terrible way to start off a relationship! Even if they were lovers previously. And the hospital scene, who knows why Remus was really mad (blink, blink)

mother-of-pearl: Thank you! Your review made my day too!

Lilia Black: Aw, don't skip sleep! Not even for my story (thinks), ok, never mind. Skip all the sleep you want. I'm evil and will never make a good mother or teacher.

WhiteWolfCub: This chapter was… almost as long, so I hope that makes up for anything and everything that's wrong with the story. And the long hibernation (w/ no sleep at all) of the author.

YamikiofAnime: Explodes! I should include an exploding scene! Just to remember all the good exploding times.

TIFFANY: It's always on my mind… ok, not always, but I definitely will persevere and finish the story. So please don't forget about this story and stick with me to the end!

YumiFukushima: Sirius is always creepy, and will always be a good actor! Except when he's sweet and stupidly in love. Like now. Thank you!

Apus-Equuleus: One of my favorite reviewers! Your reviews are so long that I like to just stare at them. (heh) Remus is still not showing… as much love… unfortunately. But next chapter! Ha! You will all see how much he loves Sirius in return! I hope this chapter had more S/R to make up for everything. Hope the lemon was acceptable, and was not… overly angsty that it turns people off. Thank you so much! The last book is coming out soon. I'm both anticipating and dreading it. Sigh.

Next Chapter: The Blue-Frozen Deal

Much love, Mikril-dey


	9. The Blue Frozen Deal

Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis

**Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis**

Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.

Chapter rating: Hm… a mild M, because Voldemort is a pervert of the worse variety, and Sirius isn't far behind.

Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE

Warning: yaoi, violence, minor deaths (this story _will_ contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)

Type: AU, romance, adventure, angst (I guess)

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.

Chapter 9: The Blue-frozen Deal

Moony had a decidedly realistic nightmare. He lay in Padfoot's arms in a small house by the sea. He could smell the warm, salty wind. Draco and Harry were racing on Shooting Stars out the window, overtop Prongs and Lily, who splashed and lounged on hot, golden sand. Wormtail sat off by himself on the sand, but he was smiling.

Then the door opened, and Severus stood framed by the light. His face was furious.

"I know what you did, Lupin," he snarled.

"What?" Moony asked, bewildered. "What do you mean, Sev?"

"You and Black," Severus' voice shook. "You… you did _that_ in my bed! Don't even think about hiding it! I know! I know everything!"

Moony felt himself explode with heat. Frantically, he struggled from Padfoot's embrace. His mate's face was tight with anger. Padfoot opened his mouth to speak, but a wild bark tore through the small house.

"That's not-" Remus tried. "We didn't mean- It's just that-"

"And worse of all," Severus snapped. "You didn't even change the sheets!"

So Remus Lupin woke screaming, "The sheets! We've got to change-"

The heavy scent of mold and decay swam over him. Remus stiffened, bare legs pressed together uncomfortably as he took in his surroundings. The scent of sweat and blood and infection filled the room. Dread rose within him as Remus looked down. Instead of Sirius on the bed beside him, it was the great black werewolf, spanning the entire length of the bed. Remus shook as the wolf breathed shallowly, powerful muscles quivering and barely hanging to life. Blood dripped from the wolf's nostrils and from within his ears.

Stumbling backwards, Remus fell off the bed, and the pain in his hip woke him completely.

"Padfoot?" his voice trembled. "Padfoot!" Leaping to his feet, Remus dug his fingers into the black werewolf's coarse fur and shook hard. The wolf's dark eyes opened briefly, glazed in pain. The wolf bared its teeth slightly but was otherwise still.

"What… where-" Remus choked. His breath caught in mid-chest and he could not breathe or see through the fog before his eyes. Frantically, he checked for injuries, finding nothing.

"Look at me, Padfoot," Remus pleaded, pressing his lips to the sprawling creature's nose, trembling against the blood and drool pooled there. Remus' thumb brushed the werewolf's eyelids and sleek ears matted with dried blood. "Please, please! Merlin, what happened? How did this- you-"

His heart clenched as he remembered. Padfoot cried and apologized and loved him. _I'm sorry it had to turn out like this._ "Is this what you meant?" Remus shouted, shaking harder. "Is this what you meant when you apologized?"

Tears felt hot down Remus' face and his eyes burned. _I can't give you what you want. _He thought of Padfoot's hot kisses and the laughter in the man's eyes. The deep rumble of Padfoot's voice always unrooted him, made him feel light and dizzy and unstable. The touch of warm hands and the desperation in his voice when Remus left him. It had broken Remus' heart in Hogwarts, and it shattered anew as he remembered. "No! I didn't mean this," Remus pressed his face against hair the scent of decay and rot. "When I said I'd take anything, I didn't mean this."

"I take it back," he whispered. "It's not enough. Padfoot! I- I want years and years. How could you?" Angrily, Remus wiped his eyes. "Damn you, Black! Damn you! I won't let you!"

A click sounded behind him. "Your brats were- Lupin!"

Remus whipped around to find Snape in the doorway, pale-faced and trembling. The bags under the gaunt man's eyes were darker than usual and his face was deep with worry. Snape pressed a hand to the doorframe to steady himself, staggering as he caught sight of the near-dead creature on the bed.

Remus' knuckles were white around the edge of the bed. "Sev…" he cried. "Sev, Padfoot is- Help him, save him! He-"

Snape crossed the room quickly, dropping down beside the werewolf and probing between his ribs. The wolf opened his eyes wearily and tried to draw his lets against himself, pained. Remus slapped Snape's hands away.

"You're hurting him more! Stop!" Remus could see nothing but the tight muscles in the wolf's face and the dullness in those dark eyes. He pressed close to the werewolf's face and could do nothing more than shake.

"I haven't seen this in a while," Snape said quietly. The man's eyes were dark and tired. "Lupin, I can't help him."

"What do you mean you can't help him?" Remus demanded. "You must! He can't- If he doesn't-" He buried his face in his hands. A thunderous wail, more animal than human, erupted from his body. Books rattled in the shelves and for a moment, Snape could hear nothing except the ringing in his ears.

Gritting his teeth, Snape shoved Remus hard, pulling his hands away and giving the man a hard punch across the cheek. A bruise immediately rose on pale skin. "Shut up!" Snape hissed. "Shut up or the whole school will hear!"

Remus paid him no heed, dropping down again, knowing nothing except anger and terror and grief. Snape snarled in frustration and dragged the younger man away from the bed.

"No! No, no!" Remus struggled. Hair swept across his face like an animal's and his eyes were wild. "I have to stay with him! He needs me! I'll kill you!"

Snape punched him again. "Listen, werewolf!" he shouted. "Voldemort's killed him already. Nothing will save him now. If you keep screaming you'll kill the rest of us as well! Shut up!"

"Voldemort…" Remus was momentarily shocked into silence.

"Yes, this is one of the Dark Lord's darkest curses. As long as the dark mark remains on our arms, he can order our deaths and a fever will spread throughout our veins." Snape looked away. "As long as we are men sworn to his service, we will live only by his mercy, little as that is."

Snape's words did not have the desired effect as Remus' head snapped up.

"Voldemort! He can save Padfoot!" Snape took a step back, frightened by the sudden intensity in Remus' blurry eyes. "Right, Sev? Voldemort can save him!"

Snape choked as Remus shook him. "The Dark Lord won't spare him. Are you mad, Lupin?"

"He will." All the insanity left Remus' eyes. He looked to the still form on the bed. Padfoot's eyes met his and Remus thought he saw a flicker of recognition. A flicker of warmth. Remus dried his eyes and stood shaking, biting his lips. He breathed deeply to regain his composure. "He will because I will make him."

Snape watched the hardness overtake Remus' startling golden eyes. He ran an agitated hand through his greased black hair. "You want to negotiate? Voldemort will ask for more than you can give."

"There is nothing I cannot give," Remus said, voice even. He still shook, but his haunted eyes held the steel gleam they'd sported when he held an entire people enthralled. Anger replaced fear. "But I will give that man nothing. Not when he did this."

Remus took a deep breath. "Sev, I need you, will you help me?"

Snape opened his mouth but Remus interrupted. "I was foolish to ask. Of course you would. I shouldn't have doubted. Send Draco to James and let the Order know the situation here. What Dumbledore has planned, bump it up to today. And…" the werewolf's face softened. "Watch over them for me. I trust you."

A strange warmth rose in Snape's chest as he'd realized he'd known Remus Lupin for more years than he could count. Perhaps he did not see what Sirius Black saw, but despite the face that he'd never seen the young werewolf in a romantic light, Remus did make his heart skip a beat, much like Dumbledore did at the height of his anger. A different type of power, but no less potent.

Snape struggled to find words. "You will go to Voldemort naked?"

Remus glanced down, confused. He flushed slightly when he realized his state of undress and hastily ran for his robe. His shirt was a messy tatter under the table. He shrugging the robe on, struggled with the buttons and said, "Sev, if I don't come back, though I know I will, tell Dumbledore Voldemort knows his plan."

Snape nodded. Remus knelt beside the bed kissed the werewolf along his open mouth, cutting his lip on fangs, and headed for the door. He paused at the doorframe. "Severus?"

"What now, Lupin?"

Remus gave a weak smile. "I promise I'll change the sheets when I come back." And then he was gone.

Pulling a chair and sitting, Snape glanced from the door to the dying creature on the bed. He shook his head. "You have no idea how fortunate you are, Black," he whispered. "What if I pointed my wand at you and killed you right now? Would that repay all those years at Hogwarts? Would you regret it then, the bastard that you were?"

"And Potter," he said after a moment. His teeth ground against each other. His clenched fists shook. "The two of you had everything, didn't you? The looks, the marks, the love of the students. They're both so blind. She… You didn't deserve it, not one moment of it. If you have any idea how much I hate… "

But he did not move to reach for his wand. After a few moments, he stood wearily, and left his office to find the children.

As much as he hated Potter and Black, Severus Snape still loved far more than he hated. Always.

* * *

Remus calmed his nerves as he strode through Durmstrang's halls. Deatheaters gave shouts as they spotted him and two closed in behind him.

"Werewolf," one growled. Remus vaguely recognized the voice of Sirius' cousin. Bellatrix. Wands jabbed painfully into his back.

"Let's go, werewolf," another spat. "You've evaded us long enough. The master wants to see you."

"Why not?" Remus said lightly. "Shall we go, gentlemen?"

Images of Sirius' dying wolf body flashed in his mind and Remus' eyes reddened. He willed the memory away forcefully and focused on the sounds of his feet across the floor. He smoothed down his hair and murmured a spell to heal the cut on his lip and dim the bruises on his face where Snape had punched. His hand strayed to his neck, where the heat from Sirius' kisses still lingered. Remus let his hands drop and his heart pounded more heavily.

"Voldemort," he said quietly as the Deatheaters shoved him into the office. The Dark Lord was a menacing shadow behind his desk, broad cloak draping down. A dark aura surrounded him, looming above him until Voldemort resembled a hunched, waiting beast instead of a man. He half stood when Remus stumbled into the room.

The Deatheaters piled into the office after Remus. He turned to regard them mildly. "If you wouldn't mind, gentlemen, I wish to speak to your lord alone."

Nervously, the Deatheaters glanced at Voldemort, whose handsome face was pinched and drawn. The Dark Lord waved them away and sat back, watching Remus wordlessly. The Deatheaters glanced at each other nervously.

"But my Lord," one of the younger Deatheaters began. His companions began edging for the door.

Voldemort's eyes narrowed. "_Cruc-_"

Remus shoved the last Deatheater out the door and slammed it before the Dark Lord could finish his curse. Cold sweat beaded on his back as he forced himself to release the knob on the door. The slow anger and the memory of Sirius' laugh gave him strength.

The office around them was black like despair. Lights lined the corners of the room, but did not light far beyond small patches along the walls. Remus did not bother to grope for chairs in the dim lighting, striding across the room and planting both hands on the edge of the Dark Lord's table.

Voldemort laughed as he looked up. His eyes were dark and the clatter of his nails against wood was a menacing echo in the still, heavy air. His gaze slid down the marks on Remus' neck. "I can feel that your little mate still lives, though it is a close thing. Tell me, how is such a thing possible."

"Easily," Remus said coldly. "Sirius Black the Deatheater swore fealty to you, and was your creature to kill. Sirius Black the werewolf swore no allegiance. His wolf side is keeping him alive."

"Not for much longer though," Voldemort sneered. "Unfortunately for me, tonight is full moon, and once again I've underestimated the strength of the werewolves." He shuffled the papers on his desk and pushed them out of the way. "Though I don't suppose he looks too handsome right now. Not the same man you remembered, I imagine."

"On the contrary," Remus said, taken aback by the unveiled satisfaction in Voldemort's voice. He cleared his throat and hid his imbalance. "He is as beautiful as a dream, as always."

He waited, feeling the soreness between his legs for the first time since he woke. Sirius had not held back the night before. Remus swallowed and kept the pain from his face.

Voldemort leaned forward, eyes gleaming. "And what do you want of me, moonchild?"

Not to be cowed, Remus leaned forward as well. The older man's hot breath across his face made Remus' skin crawl and he tightened his grip on the table to maintain his composure. His voice was calm as he spoke. "I would have you release him from your service."

"I am not interested in letting traitors live," Voldemort said simply. Then a leer stretched across his face. Remus gritted his teeth as the man's hands brushed his wrists and up into the arm of his robe. "Though if you are willing, Dumbledore's pet diplomat, we may come to some sort of agreement."

Remus snatched his hand back, shaken. Voldemort leaned back and reclined on the arm of his chair. "Tell me," he asked. "Were you in such a hurry to see me this morning? Or do you always go about wearing nothing underneath your robes?"

Nearly, Remus' hands shot to the collar of his robes, but he forced down the impulse and stood stiffly in the light. Not only was he too distracted to think of clothes, his underclothes were torn by his partial transformation during the night. They no longer hung on his body with any semblance of form.

Voldemort's face showed smug satisfaction. "Whore," he said loudly. Remus flinched at the word and the Dark Lord pressed on. "Did you come here hoping to trade yourself for your mate's pathetic short life?" He gestured. "Loose your robe and let's see if you're truly bare beneath."

"No."

"Did I hear right, moonchild?" Voldemort asked silkily.

"I said no," Remus repeated. His voice grew in volume. Back straight and eyes meeting the Dark Lord's, he approached the table again. He breathed deeply and eased a smile back on his face.

"I don't recall saying that I was here to bargain," he said softly. "I will give you nothing."

Voldemort's eyes clouded. "Then why are you here?"

"I am telling you a simple fact," Remus said. He did not raise his voice, but the weight of his words grew as he spoke. "Let Sirius go, or I will bring your entire Deatheater army down to dust by your feet."

There was a pause. Voldemort laughed. "That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. How would you go about such a task?"

Remus smiled his polite smile and raised a finger. "It's not what I am going to do, it is what I have already done, with your help. One, you've tortured Lucius Malfoy's son and sent him far away on a mission that could take months or years. Madam Malfoy hates and mistrusts you, and who knows what poisonous things she and her son will tell dear Lucius when he comes home? And if Lucius turns, so will Avery, Nott, Crabbe, Goyle, who knows how many?"

A second finger. "You've nearly killed Sirius. The Deatheaters here are young and scared and they saw Sirius as a hero. Regulus, Peter, Karkaroff, Carrow, Gibbon, Rookwood, Rosier, there are so many in his debt. So many who loved him among your little army… He is a man with no less charisma than you."

A third finger. "You killed Crouch. You may not have seen it, Voldemort, but everyone else knew it. He loved you with everything in him. You tortured him and killed him. How will you conceal such a secret? Something that could waver even the most loyal of your men…"

The werewolf felt his grin grow malicious. "There are so many among your ranks whose loyalties waver, as if balanced on a blade. How should I proceed from here? Tell Dumbledore how undermanned you are right now? Tell Malfoy about his family? If I loose my tongue among your gullible army for five minutes, you will be finished. Friendless, powerless, with nothing. And I didn't set up any of it."

"You'd be dead before you could try it," Voldemort said, truly alarmed now. His hand inched for his wand.

Remus held up a hand. "I wouldn't, Voldemort. If I do not return, someone will owl Dumbledore and the Order will be over this place in hours. Can you evacuate in mere hours without uncomfortable questions?"

"You-" Voldemort's voice shook. His wand glowed green and the wavering tip painted bright shapes in the dim room. "You bluff."

"You're welcome to try, my Lord, see if I'm bluffing." Remus said mildly. He pulled open the collar of his robe. The shredded remains of his white shirt hung off his shoulders. Kiss marks lined his collar bone. He grinned up at the Dark Lord. "See, not truly bare after all. Just in love."

The Dark Lord's expression was one of pure rage. His fingers clenched and unclenched against his wand. His eyes glittered strangely as he stood.

Suddenly, Remus found his back pressed against the Dark Lord's chest. A thick arm was drawn across his throat. Remus choked, clawing at the arm. The werewolf rose inside him at the threat, angry and frantic.

_Let loose!_ Remus found himself screaming. _Let me loose! I'll kill him! I'll tear him into pieces!_

"You've neglected one important thing, Remus Lupin," Voldemort snarled. "If I kill you, they'll fall upon this place like so many vermin. But I don't have to kill you. I'll pluck out your eyes, your fingers and your limbs and parade you in front of them. Think they'll attack if they think they can save your life? I know that old man Dumbledore too well for that."

Remus pulled the arm away, shaking like a leaf. "You don't know him well enough," he said. "He would attack nonetheless. However, I wouldn't expect you to understand."

"Understand what?" Voldemort demanded brusquely.

"Love," Remus managed, massaging his throat.

Voldemort struck him. Remus gasped and backed away, head ringing. Briefly, he wondered if he should tell the Dark Lord Severus Snape struck harder than he did. He decided against it, settling for a weak grin.

"Don't attempt to deceive me," Voldemort hissed. "I know of your love nonsense. I know that is _precisely_ why he will not attack if you are alive and in my hands."

Remus shook his head. "Not his love for me, though that is strong enough. My love for the man you are about to kill. If you let Sirius die, I will go with him, without fail. If you prevent my death, then Dumbledore will know. To kill me is to show me mercy. He will not hold back."

"Even if you say the truth," Voldemort said. "What if I say you're too late, Black is already dead when we were bickering?"

"Impossible," Remus said. "I would feel it."

"And if I let him go but not you?" Voldemort said silkily.

"Then the snitch is in his court," Remus laughed. "And Sirius, Sirius may not have been the best player on our House Team, but he has never lost a game when it truly counted."

He held his palm against his bruised cheek, breathing deeply. "So choose… Tom Riddle. Let him live and let me go, or go down under, and history will always remember you as the dark wizard who failed to be."

* * *

"Mr. Vance," Dumbledore said thoughtfully. "I asked for you today because your people knew of a curse I believe could bring down the Dark Lord." He brought his old hands together and laced his fingers. "This curse brings two souls together, so that if one is killed, the other shall die as well, no matter the cause of death."

The man addressed shifted suspiciously in his chair. The phoenix on his arm burned a little hotter and puffed out its wings. Dumbledore's own phoenix Fawkes squawked and stole a lemon piece from the table, chewing and watching the meeting with disinterest.

Vance breathed deeply and met Dumbledore's eyes. "Why do you wish to know?"

"Because I am not a fool," Dumbledore said quietly. "I know Voldemort will surpassed me. Perhaps I am his match now, but while I will grow older, he will only grow more powerful. His power grows as he thirsts and his hatred builds. Mr. Vance, if I do not risk my life to take him, then who else will?"

"I admit I do not understand your adamant insistence," Vance said, frowning so fiercely his old brows knitted together and he stooped forward. "From my bond with my phoenix, I have lived far longer than you, Dumbledore, though I know you are well aged among your peers. Mine have been around a long time and I have seen other dark wizards and witches come and go. Countess Bathory of Hungary once bred a dark army of blood-sucking demons; tormenting and mutilating vampires she'd trapped until they went mad with the suffering. She was far worse than your Voldemort."

Dumbledore stayed silent, so the old man continued. "Evil will be defeated, in one way or another. They always have been and this time will be no different."

"You're wrong," Dumbledore said. "You all underestimate him. Did you think I've never heard of the infamous Countess? Of Lamia, of Kuei or all the past great evils of our world? Of… Gell… Grindelwald? I assure you, Voldemort is different. If we do not stop him now, Voldemort will set every continent ablaze." He closed his eyes briefly and polished his spectacles. "Please, Mr. Vance. If you do not trust me, trust in Remus, who trusts me. I will not abuse any power you share with me."

"It is not that simple," Vance replied. He gestured vaguely. "Such a bond requires… an affinity in magic, of fate, even. It is a bond used between beings who love each other, to last their entire lives, like the bond between phoenix and human. You propose to turn that into a vile thing, used to kill and hurt."

Dumbledore bowed his head. "Yes. I am sorry, Mr. Vance."

"And," Vance added. "Such a spell does not work when one party desires death. That is the only way to break the spell. In such a bond, if one party desires life and the other death, then the one who commits suicide will die and the other will live on."

"You misunderstand me, Mr. Vance," Dumbledore said softly. "I have no desire to die. I will not commit suicide. I will cast this and then I will fight him. And so, regardless of the outcome, my last thought would be how to defeat him, how to keep my students and the world safe."

"A harsh fate," Vance murmured.

"I've faced worse and triumphed," Dumbledore said firmly. "I will do so again. There will be replacements for me. And if there will be dark wizards and witches in the future, may they look back to this day and realize that good _will_ triumph and there will always be people willing to fight and die for those they love."

The old man stared at Dumbledore for a few moments. "You will get your wish, Dumbledore," he said softly. "But I will not tell you how to perform the bond. Instead, I will take your place."

"Mr. Vance!" Dumbledore sat back, startled. "I cannot allow you to-"

"Not a matter of allowance," Vance said easily. "I have lived long enough, and there are many to take my place as well. My daughter, for one. Or you. If I am gone, you will take care of my people in my stead."

Dumbledore's mouth twitched and his eyes were pained. "Mr. Vance. I cannot thank you. I will carry your burden for the rest of my days. You are most merciless in exacting payment."

"That's why I lived so long."

A knock came from the office door. Dumbledore, headache growing, gestured to it. The door swung open to reveal a giant of a man. He ducked under the doorway and stood stooped in the small office, scraggly hair brushing the blue ceiling and dodging the light.

"Hagrid," Dumbledore smiled tiredly. "Are you rested?"

"Quite well, professor," Hagrid replied. He gestured outside. "The giants have agreed. They will stand with us."

"Good," Dumbledore nodded. "Then we are ready for our attack on Durmstrang."

* * *

Sirius woke to a pair of wide green eyes staring at him. For a long time, he did nothing but stare, lips twisting upward. He could feel every bone in his body, each aching in their sockets. The pain in his skull was incredible, pouring like thunder between his ears. He smelled blood and fever in the room, but the scents came to him from a distance. Sirius breathed shakily and tried to concentrate on the scene before him. The little boy reached over the edge of the bed and grasped his thumb. A sparkle entered those eyes.

"You're awake," Harry said. He rested his cheek on the bed and closed his eyes, briefly. "I was supposed to watch you, but you didn't move at all. I got scared a couple times, really. I'm glad you're awake."

_I'm awake?_ Sirius thought idly. _I am… how strange._ Was he not supposed to be awake? He could not remember.

Even when he opened his mouth, Sirius wasn't sure what he meant to say. "Moon…"

"Just laid his life down to save your pathetic little hide," a voice said dryly from further off. The familiar sarcasm chased away all the remnants of sleep. Sirius sat up abruptly, and the pain struck him face on.

"Ow… Merlin," he groaned, clutching his head. He pitched forward against his knees. Bile rose in his throat. Every inch of him was damp with sweat. Merlin's beard, he stank. He wavered for a moment, between waking and black oblivion. The thought brought him back.

"Snape…" he croaked. "What? What did you mean?"

"I meant that of your merry little band, he was the only one of any worth," Snape said. He stood and folded the book in his lap. With a swirl of his cape, he headed out the door. "He's wasted on you. I simply cannot imagine… Regardless, you are awake, so I can remove myself from your disgusting presence."

"Wait," Sirius growled. When Snape did not stop, Sirius lunged for the side of the bed, landing painfully on his side. His stomach churned and he retched against the ground. "Snivellus!"

"Sirius, Sirius!" Harry patted his back frantically, pushing at his arms. Sirius rested a hand in the messy black hair to calm the boy.

"Well?" Snape said coldly from the door. "Did you insult me just so I would stay behind and watch your disgusting display? Or did you have other insults to throw?"

"Moony," Sirius barked. "Where is he? What is going on? I thought I-"

In a rush, memories of the previous night came to him. The talk with Dumbledore, the battle, the curse, the night with Remus. Remembering, Sirius' heart sped and his chest swelled with warmth, briefly expelling the nausea. And then… Sirius remembered death. The bright fields and listening, waiting, as his heart beat slowed and darkness crawled around him and the warm of Remus in his arms slowly melted in the dull pain.

"I was dead," Sirius whispered. He looked up, eyes wide with panic. "Snape, I was dead! I remember dying… so why…" _Why am I still alive?_

Snape should've felt satisfaction at the confusion on Sirius Black's face. Instead, he only felt bitterness.

Happiness. The incident only threw his own lack of fortune into sharp relief, taunted him with all that he did not have. If it was him slowly, painfully dying from Voldemort's yellow fever, who would've said with that steely glint in their eyes, "_there is nothing I cannot give_" for him? And Snape was sure _she_ would've done for Potter, the blasted git.

"You should've died," Snape said numbly. "Lupin went to Voldemort and convinced him to let you go. I do not know how. I did not believe he could do it."

"Moony…"

Snape felt his collar snatched and he was pressed against the wall. Hands dug painfully against his shoulder blades. "Where…" Sirius breathed with difficulty.

"Black, do you never look around you?" Snape sneered. "Or has the heat spoiled your brains? Lupin is on the bed next to you. Fell asleep as soon as he returned."

The look of elation and bliss that came over Sirius Black's expression did not make Snape feel better. He was released as Sirius surged to the bed next to the limp form under pale hospital blankets. He tidied his clothes and straightened.

"I'm going," he announced, but nobody in the room turned to him. Breathing hurt his chest as he swept from the room, holding his head high.

Outside, a tired Draco Malfoy leaned against the door to the inner chamber. The small, pale face was downcast and the blond hair drooped a little more than usual.

"You're going already?"

Snape turned to see the boy shuffle his feet. When he looked up though, the silvery eyes were unreadable. A slow second later, the boy crossed his arms and the familiar haughty Malfoy expression returned.

"Since I'm not welcome here, yes," Snape said.

"He's awake then," Draco said. "My uncle, I mean. I thought he was dead. I'd never… I'd seen wizards die before, but that was different. I've never felt so terrible before, when I thought he was dead and Remus was with the Dark Lord. And they don't even know how much I worried. Nor would they care, really. Why should they?"

Snape wasn't sure if it was the mellow mood descended over him, or if it was the boy's expressionless face. He turned back and knelt next to the boy. His robes settled around them. Draco twitched but his face remained passive.

"Mr. Malfoy," he said slowly. "One day you will realize that not everyone is destined to be happy. One day, I woke up and realized the one I love needed me to protect her happiness, and she needed me to give up mine for hers. When that day came, Mr. Malfoy, as it may come for you if you are unfortunate… remember their smiles and tell yourself… you are doing your part to protect that, and that should be enough. Do you understand?"

Draco shook his head. His eyes were livid. "No," he scowled. "Why should I sacrifice myself? I would go in and take whatever I wanted."

"Then why won't you walk into that room right now?" Snape taunted. "It's because you know, isn't it? Just like I do. That… is not the place for us, no matter how much they open their doors. It's for _them_, for Potter and Black and those hypocrites." He spat the words. "They will always be somewhere I cannot reach, no matter how hard I claw my way up. Her smile is a painful burden, but one I promised to bear."

Ignoring the look of dismay on the boy's face, though Snape's heart sank more at the sight, he turned and strode down the corridor. The echo of his boots against the floor vibrated through the empty hall. Snape clenched his fists until his nail marks were embedded in his palm.

* * *

"Sirius?" Harry shook the man worriedly. He had collapsed over Remus' bed, head bowed into the covers and eyes closed. His breathing was long and even. Harry hoped he hadn't fallen asleep again. It was an awkward position to rest in, and if past experience was any indication, an uncomfortable Sirius tended to be short tempered, though never malicious.

"Sirius, you need to wake up," he said urgently.

A low chuckle. "Harry, I am awake. Merlin… I'm awake, alive. It hurts so damn much, but… ugh… it's glorious."

The dark head lifted from the covers. Harry sighed in relief. Laughter had returned to Sirius' eyes, though there was a shadow underneath them. The man regarded him for a moment before picking himself up to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Where's the Malfoy brat?" Sirius asked. His eyes narrowed. "The little snitch isn't in some mischief again, is he?"

"No, no," Harry said hastily. "Draco hasn't come back yet. He's gone to tell the Order about Remus' plan. They both know what it is and they wouldn't tell me. Maybe he stayed behind because mom kept him for a meal. She did that once, and I laughed at him because mom can't cook."

Sirius laughed. "I can imagine, though your mother was a genius at potions, she cannot cook well enough to feed flies. Only one better at potions was little Snivellus, except he was always a chicken about owning up to his own works. Something about letting her win, he was smitten, you know?"

"_He_ was?" Harry wondered. "He's so angry all the time."

"Bitter," Sirius said firmly. "As he'd always been because he was too much of a coward to go out and fight for what he wants."

Harry hummed and looked away. With the subject of Snape settled, the two sat on either ends of the hospital bed in awkward silence. Remus dozed behind them, bruises and cuts down his side, some from his partial transformation the night before, some from recent injuries. Watching him, Sirius felt the first of the anger start, now that euphoria dissipated.

What had Remus done to convince Voldemort. Horror and pride rose in Sirius' chest. He knew if there was anyone who could outtalk Voldemort, it was Remus J. Lupin. He just didn't know how.

Slowly, heart beating, fingers trembling, Sirius slipped his hand under the sheet and up Remus' thigh. Nothing felt out of the ordinary. No broken bones or bruises. But then, did Sirius really know what he was looking for, what he feared?

Sirius snatched his hand back when he realized Harry had been watching him with a frown on his face. "That was clinical," Sirius said, a little too loudly.

"You're like dad," Harry said finally. "He does that at night sometimes. I didn't notice it before." The smile across his boyish face was brilliant. "I'm sorry I was rude."

"That's a little too much information, Harry," Sirius said exasperatedly. "I don't need to know how he felt up Lily in the middle of the night. How would you know anyway, little brat?"

Harry flushed bright red. "No!" he denied vehemently. "Your look!" His voice softened. "You look at Remus the way dad looks at mom, when he thinks she's not looking. I've never seen anyone else with that look before."

"Perhaps you have simply not been looking," Sirius said, not unkindly. He could not help the smile that rose on his lips. Perhaps he was not so different from James after all.

"I don't hate you," Harry said suddenly. "Did you think I did?"

"Yes," Sirius said quietly. "You never looked at me." Harry did so now, and there wasn't a trace of fright or anger in his expression. In Sirius' memory, Harry had never warmed to him, glued to Draco's or Remus' sides and turning his small back to Sirius, as if trying to exclude him. What prompted the change?

"Well I never did," Harry said with a nod. His voice fell. "I was angry. Remus and Draco had never… they'd never been so attached to anyone else before. And I didn't like you and mom and dad always talked about you." Harry bit his lips. "But… I do feel safer with you than anyone, even Remus."

Sirius stared. What could he say to that?

Flushed, Harry changed the subject. "What does it feel like?" he wondered. "To love someone like that?"

"Ask your father," Sirius scratched his head. "I cannot explain. Like something bigger than yourself. Like you'd touched this great realm whenever you see their face, and you could never get close enough."

"I'd felt like that before, then," Harry said suddenly.

Sirius laughed. "Liar. You're far too young for it."

"Am not," Harry huffed. His green eyes glittered and the boy resembled Lily so much in the unnatural brightness in his eyes. Sirius blinked and remembered the girl from Hogwarts, who, to him, simply seemed constantly angry. However, even back then, he knew there was no room for doubt in such clear eyes.

"Who is it?"

Harry glanced away, flushing darkly.

"Now I know you're lying…" Sirius' mouth fell open as realization dawned on him. "That brat? Since when? I'd not suspected once."

"He came through the mirror bleeding," Harry swallowed as he remembered. "I thought he was so much older and rather scary, but he wasn't. He was more scared than I was, and I'd never met anyone so lonely before. He would never tell me anything he was feeling, but I knew anyway."

In Sirius' mind, images of his eleven-year-old self on the train to school surfaced. Haughty, rude, but clutching his suit cases a little too tightly. He was carsick on the train, but hid it with a scowl and terrorizing all who crossed his path. Back then, he had no inkling who the small blond boy he bumped into was. However, hadn't he felt the barest touch of the vast feeling? As if he touched a realm many levels above his life.

Though if he'd come crashing through Remus' mirror, how glorious would that have been?

Sirius stood. His hand trailed down Remus' cheek to his neck and down his chest. The werewolf did not stir, but his breathing was calm and his face was not tensed in pain or discontent. The dark lines under his eyes were like a statue's.

Sirius leaned in for a ghostly butterfly kiss on the other man's lips, fingertips brushing through soft hair, clumped with blood or sweat. Remus needed a bath, just as Sirius did. But first…

"The brat has been too long," he said shortly. "A trip to the Order should not take so long, whether Lily's food killed him or not. He must be back. I will search for him."

Sirius was nearly at the door when Harry's voice stopped him. "Sirius."

He turned back to the boy, checking his clothes. "What? I'll be careful."

"No," Harry shook his head. The boy hopped off the bed and stood near the foot, one hand clutching the railing. He feigned nonchalance, but Sirius could see the boy's hands trembling. "Dad told me once. I had a… um… godfather who was an old friend from school. Do you… do you know who he is?"

Sirius felt a smirk crawl up his face. "I suppose I do, Harry. I suppose I do."

* * *

Draco did not know which was worse, looking at the pain in Snape's face or hearing it in his voice with condemning words. Or recognizing that pain.

He supposed he did know. Draco did not belong in that small circle of Harry and Remus and Sirius Black. Or in that small Potter household of burnt food and great posters of Quidditch teams and Harry's childhood drawings. He belonged in Malfoy Castle, that great house of a hundred empty rooms, layers of echoes, and house elves that scuttled out of sight.

Draco strode away from the hidden office, swinging his invisibility cloak over his shoulders. He wanted his mother and her familiar clipped tones. At least those, he knew would stay.

The hallways opened up to Durmstrang's small salt-water pool. A school of tame sharks swam there and Draco knelt to stir the water. He felt a grim satisfaction as the sharks pushed up close. He reached deeper into the water.

"Small boy, are you unsatisfied with life?" an unfamiliar voice asked. "You stick your hand in such danger. Do you trust these tame sharks?"

Draco wrenched his hand from the water and swirled to face the voice. He did not remove his invisibility cloak.

The man removed himself from the shadows of the hall. He was middle aged, Asian, wore outdated jeans and T-shirt, and had a curious white stone clutched in one hand. The man held out a hand to Draco.

"Small boy, I know you are still there." The man grinned. "Did you want to lose an arm?"

"Sharks don't attack people," Draco huffed. "They wouldn't keep them in a school if they did."

"Still, you did not toy with the goldfish pools, and those are abundant in this place."

"That's none of your business," Draco shouted, throwing back his hood. If the man was a Deatheater, Draco didn't care. "Who are you?"

"And that," the man gestured to Draco's hood, "is also unwise. I see family resemblance, little Master Malfoy. You look very much like your father, if a little softer around the eyes. Will you not inform your master that we have reached our decision? We will stand with him in this fight. My comrades will arrive later tonight."

Draco stopped breathing for a moment. The plan! Remus' plan would be ruined if his father came back now. Sweat sleeked his palms. Draco wiped his hands on his robes and plastered a smile on his face. Remus thought Lucius Malfoy would turn against the Dark Lord for Draco, but Remus didn't know Lucius. Draco knew his father was too proud to turn for anything. "You are a Chiyen. We… we do not need your service right now. You can just go back. Where is my father?"

The Chiyen raised an eyebrow. "Your father stressed the situation was dire, so I've hurried here. Yet there is no one to greet me, and I have seen so few wizards worth talking to. I understand Master Malfoy sent a message through his lady wife…"

"My Lord is much too busy," Draco nodded convincingly.

The Chiyen sighed. "Very well, then lead me to my quarters, little master."

Draco had no choice but to lead the man through the halls, occasionally peering up at the man. Finally, he blurted, "What is a Chiyen anyway?"

The man laughed. "You would call them squibs, Master Malfoy."

"Squibs?" Draco wrinkled his nose. "Why would the Dark Lord want help from a bunch of squibs?"

"Squibs do not have magic of their own," the Chiyen explained, "but there is still one option open to them. Your land has not developed it, but both full blooded witches and wizards in our land have practiced this skill as well. Those best at it, however, are the squibs.

"That option is the reflection of magic."

Draco did not understand.

The Chiyan stopped by a window and looked out. "When another witch or wizards casts a spell at you, little Master, the magic is engraved in you. Whether that spell is a Cheering Charm or a Cruciatus curse, the power is harvestable. If a squib receives ten Cheering Charms and collects the magic from all those, he could cast a cheer a hundred times stronger than usual. If a squib receives a dozen Cruciatus, he could cast a torturing spell that would make the strongest of men wish for death and commit suicide."

The man was silent for a moment. "Wizards and witches cannot do this well. If you own magic, your body is naturally defensive. Each Chiyen has had thousands of spells cast on them from birth, breaking bones, healing, cheering, binding… It is a torturous training, but it actually makes us stronger than normal witches or wizards."

They started walking again. "Does that answer your question, little master?"

"Yes," Draco's eyes glowed. "Can you teach me? I want to know how to harvest power." Voldemort had cast _Crucio_ on him before, and the idea of using that dark power against his enemies attracted Draco.

"You will not make a good Chiyen," the man said bluntly. "Your magic is strong. I felt it before I saw you."

"So?" Draco asked. "If they have to cast a hundred Cheering Charms at me before I can cast a powerful one, that's good too."

So the Chiyen explained how to withdraw magic into his skin, how to imagine being embraced by his mother. Draco thought of Narcissa, then settled for picturing Remus in his mind. Immediately, he imagined the young werewolf's thin arms and tilted grin. Remus' eyes glowed when he talked to Draco and he always leaned inward. Draco relaxed. The Chiyen threw spells at him, which quickly absorbed into his skin and he felt them sizzle inside his chest like pent-up energy.

"You have talent," the Chiyen said, amazed. "Whoever you were picturing, they must truly love you. Few wizards and witches I know could expose themselves like this. Though you do not harvest power as well as a squib, you'll do."

"So," Draco frowned. "How long until I can cast a _Crucio_ that makes someone want to die?"

The Chiyen laughed as they reached an empty guest room. The man entered and poked his head out of the door. "Don't attempt it, little master. You'll need to be hit enough times to drive you mad."

The door shut and Draco replaced his hood. He hummed in excitement. Wait until he told Harry!

Abruptly, Draco remembered Snape's words. He did not belong. He thought of Remus when he harvested magic, but he felt like a cheat. Remus had no relation to Draco. What right did Draco have to use Remus' memory? Draco swallowed and wandered. He did not want to go back.

A heavy hand fell on his shoulder through the invisibility cloak. Draco yelped and twirled.

"Where were you going, brat?" Sirius Black asked lazily. "I could smell you from the other end of the school."

Draco shook off the hand and snarled, "None of your business."

Sirius' face darkened. "Hold out your hand," he said. When Draco did, the man struck him hard across his palm. The strike echoed through the hall and Draco felt pain spike up his arm. The boy clutched his arm to him and looked up, bewildered and angry. An irregular bruise formed on his palm.

"That is for being a brat," Sirius said, slipping his own reddening hand back into his robe. His eyes were dark. "It is my business because if a Deatheater found you, your death would be on my head. Your mother will kill me and your father will do worse. Remus would never forgive himself. Harry will grieve forever. It is my business because people care for you and I am one of them."

Sirius grabbed the stunned boy by the robe front of the invisibility cloak and pulled him closer. Draco's seemingly disembodied head trembled. "Now, come with me and stop causing trouble, brat."

Draco ducked his head and Sirius had a horrible suspicion the boy was crying. He scoffed. He had no idea how to deal with such a volatile child. Brats were trouble anyway. He'd leave Remus to deal with them.

* * *

Remus woke feeling more tired than when he slept. He groaned and buried his face in the pillow.

"Remus?" Harry's voice sounded too loud by his ears. Remus felt a weight settle on the bed. A small hand touched his shoulders.

"I'm still asleep," Remus mumbled, then blinked into the pillow and sat up. He swayed briefly. He could not believe how tired he was. His eyes fell closed and he eased back against the bed. "Sirius-"

"Sirius went to fetch Draco."

"He woke up then. He's alright."

"Yes," Harry paused, large green eyes worried. The boy fumbled with the sheets and his hands were unsteady. "Draco didn't come back. It shouldn't take so long, right? What if he got lost in the mirrors. There're so many mirrors in the world. What if he's hurt again, like the first time."

"I don't know how Draco's Mirror Walking works, Harry," Remus said softly. "But even when he was lost the first time, he found you. He'd never gotten lost since. Don't worry, Sirius will find him."

"I'm not worried," Harry huffed. He shuffled up the bed to curl beside Remus. "Mr. Snape left you that," he gestured.

Remus glanced at the hissing cup of wolfs bane on the counter and paled. He'd forgotten. The stress of full moon caught up to him. Remus shook at the thought. His first full moon since his mating.

Mating… Merlin… he and Sirius had… Now that the danger was past, memories of the previous night flooded him. Remus flushed so hard he felt dizzy. His lips and skin tingled as he remembered and he keenly felt the ache in his hips. His thighs felt uncomfortable when he pressed them together.

"Remus?" Harry said, alarmed. "Are you feverish?"

Which made Remus feel worse. "I…"

He groaned again when he scented Sirius in the hallway outside. Giving into apprehension and childish terror, Remus dropped back on the bed and pulled the covers up to his chin.

"I'm going back to sleep," he whispered, closing his eyes. Harry looked at him incredulously.

"Remus!" Harry protested.

Remus shut his eyes and feigned sleep. The door clicked open and shut. Draco's scent, like spice and a cold forest, was mingled with uncertainty and unease. Remus felt a brief moment of worry before Sirius' scent overwhelmed him. Sirius' scent was deep and powerful, like the sea, the warm sand and as dark as a moonless night. Remus' breath caught. Warmth flooded him and Remus was sure every inch of his skin was red and hot.

"Draco," he heard Sirius say. There was a scuffle from the children and Remus heard their footsteps retreat into the adjoining back room.

_No,_ he thought, near panic. _Harry, traitor, don't leave me_.

The bed compressed as a body heavier than Harry's settled onto it. Remus felt Sirius lean over him, an arm on either side.

"Not awake yet, Moony?" Sirius asked. His voice was gentle, but Remus heard a smirk. "I'm not such a good man I won't take advantage you know?"

Remus' heart skipped a beat and he felt terror.

Sirius was faster. He rolled onto Remus, knees spreading apart sore thighs and his large hands diving under the blankets. Sirius' fingers were rough and cool against Remus' skin.

"No," Remus yelped. "I'm awake." He sprang up and crashed into Sirius' chest.

Unsurprised, Sirius caught the back of Remus' neck and pulled him up into a hard, overpowering kiss. Sirius' tongue pushed past his lips, sliding between teeth and roughly tracing sensitive spots inside. Sirius' hand found its target upon too-hot skin. Remus' wrists were caught and pinned above his head. The dark haired man pressed Remus back into the bed, pressing down so hard he made Remus breathless. Remus did not remember what his normal body temperature felt like, he couldn't remember anything but the heat and the sensation. His whimper was swallowed by Sirius' kiss.

When Sirius finally pulled away, Remus sagged against the pillow. He waited till his vision cleared a little and stared at Sirius, who was always panting. A hand still lazily traced along Remus' stomach, dipping into his bellybutton, causing him to gasp.

"My turn?" Remus asked shakily. He pulled his hands free and placed them on either side of Sirius' face, feeling skin as hot as his and the hum of life. "You're alive. Merlin… Padfoot, don't you ever… You don't know how I…" His normally smooth tongue failed him. Remus leaned up to kiss the corners of Sirius' lips, pressing their foreheads together.

"I'm alive," Sirius choked, squeezing him tighter. "I was ready to die, and I was happier than I'd ever been in my life. Yet my heart broke every time I looked at you last night. I can't explain. I had only happy thoughts, yet I couldn't stop crying." He swallowed. "I'm so sorry."

"You didn't think I'd follow you?" Remus asked softly. "You didn't think that if you died, I'd follow you?"

Sirius stiffened. With their cheeks touching, Remus felt Sirius' jaw tighten. Then he relaxed. "I did think that, but I knew everyone would stop you. You love them, the brats, I mean. They needed you. You wouldn't have done it in the end."

"I would!" Remus felt tears again. He kicked out and Sirius grunted. "Draco and Harry may need me, but…" He clung on. "I need you. More than they'd ever need me."

Sirius groaned. His expression darkened. Sirius remembered the way Voldemort had stared at Remus. They kissed again, slower and gentler this time. "This is worth everything. But, Moony… Voldemort? You shouldn't have. Are you so foolish? Did he hurt you? Did he-"

Remus looked away and his lips tightened.

"Moony," Sirius shook. "Look, he can take nothing from you. There's nothing anyone could do to make you shine less…"

Remus was laughing. Sirius drew away a little, stunned. He couldn't remember the last time Remus had laughed so openly. Events before last night seemed years ago.

When Remus looked at Sirius again, his golden eyes were bright and strong. Confidence made his face glow and Sirius felt a love bordering on awe. Confidence made Remus far more beautiful.

"What, Mr. Padfoot?" Remus leaned in to smile against Sirius' neck. "Is sex all I can offer? I am better than that, I think. As for Voldemort, he is no match for me in negotiations. I would be a poor negotiator if I allowed myself to be hurt. I gave him nothing in return for the world."

Sirius felt the last of the tension drain from him. "I am humbled, Mr. Moony."

"As you should be." Remus kissed him one last time before sliding out from beneath Sirius. He leaned against the headboard and rubbed his eyes. "Merlin, I'm tired. But we have no time to rest. What is the hour, Padfoot?"

"Four, last I checked out in the hall," Sirius replied.

Remus groaned. "Albus and the others are attacking at seven. We have three hours to make sure the kids know what to do. Draco has the ability to escape, but he refuses to leave without Harry. We'll have to hand Harry over to the rescuers. And… it's full moon tonight."

"Shit," Sirius said calmly. "We can't just lock ourselves in. If we take wolfs bane, we'll be useless and burdens to the rescuers. The battlefield will be chaotic."

"Now that we are two, a pack and mated," Remus' cheeks heated a little again. "Our human minds should maintain a little control. We'll need to keep the mission in mind. We will fight our way out. We'll defeat any Deatheater that tries to stop us." He leaned forward to take Sirius' hand. "To you and your wolf side both… er… I am your mate. It is a fact. Don't try to reinforce that in the hallways tonight."

"Sex on a battlefield," Sirius considered soberly. "A pity. It would've been a thrill. But I suppose if my mate requests it… I'll have to be selfless." He paused to take a deep breath before pulling away completely. His eyes were dark as he stared at Remus. "You are truly mine then, Moony? After a whole life of pining and sneaking and plotting? It's not just the werewolf bond, but your feelings too?"

"Soul and heart," Remus said. "If you didn't know that since third year Hogwarts, you're a bigger fool than I thought." He grinned, which made the room brighter and softer. "As for my body, that depends entirely on your performance tonight, Mr. Padfoot."

* * *

Author's Note: After dying for more than a year, Sirius Black is revived! And er… me too.

Yes I have dropped off the face of the planet and am now writing from outer space. (Weeps). Somewhere in the tip of the Big Dipper, I think… I would say sorry again, but an apology just doesn't cut it, does it? (crawls away into a hole)

The climax of this chapter, which was Remus confronting Voldemort, ended up being a lot shorter and a lot less powerful than I would've liked. But I enjoyed writing Remus at work the way I envisioned him. What I've always found most powerful about Remus in the books was his ability to gently persuade others. His tongue was hurtful sometimes, but always succeeded.

I love Snape, I really do, but deep down, I do not think he is a wholesomely good person. That's actually what I find attractive about his character, that he is a villain with a great capacity for love and a great capacity for evil, and wounds and suffering. When I read the book, I saw someone that was constantly in pain, and still doing his best because of it, and I hoped I was able to show even a bit of that in this chapter.

What Snape said to Draco in this chapter is something I hope will carry on to the sequel of this story, which I am determined to write, but am unsure when I will be able to. I'd like to finish this story first, as there are only 13 chapters… 12 if some of the later ones are short, which I suspect they will be.

I'm sorry there was so little SiriusxRemus in this chapter. However, this is as much an adventure story as it is a romance, so… yeah. Hopefully, there was enough little details, character developments and other stuff to make up for it.

ChibiMewPiku: Thank you so, so much! And you're my latest reviewer and, as always, that means you're one of the main reasons I had for updating. So really, I have to thank you! It's a little ironic because I've been struggling with emotions and descriptions in my writing lately. And thank you for being willing to wait.

Muumuu122: Yes, I'm continuing. (Winces) Just… slowly… There's only two or three more chapters until the end, so I hope that makes up for the slowness, knowing the story is more than halfway finished. Thanks for reviewing!

SilverWhiteDragon: ?? What? What? Sirius didn't die! No, he didn't! I swear! (Points above) See? See? I don't lie. Hm… there's a rhyme in there somewhere.

Vixen-Ra: OOC… That's one of this fic's greatest flaws, isn't it… I couldn't help it with this one. All the characters just seemed to come off differently when I write. I was hoping my other fanfic kept them a little more in-character. Thanks for reviewing again! That people are still reading gives me the greatest thrills ever.

Shinigami: Teehee. That actually seems more like the sort of thing Lily (or at least the Lily from my story) would do. But was Rita Skeeter a reporter at this time? This is at least six years before we meet her in the cannon version. Hm… I'm sure if I do some more research, I'll be able to find out, or find someone who's close enough to Skeeter. The Minister is going down… down… down… down… (sings)

Annaiel: Oh, that's horrible! (Though I've done it too, laugh at funerals, that is. My dad threw me out of the car on the highway and drove off. Didn't come back for like… 20 minutes. (cries)). I definitely got your review, and I'm so relieved I was able to create the right emotion. I was hoping it wasn't just cheesy and cliché. And yes, I should be shot for not updating.

gay for yaoi: Ooh! Support! Support is wonderful! Thank you so much! I hope I haven't driven you off and you'll get to read this.

red eye witch: Thank you! Unfortunately, sometimes I did think of the ideas at 2 am… (It's 2 am right now, as a matter of fact). But you know? Sometimes you can't write down the ideas in your head unless you're so tired you can't see the computer screen, ne? I always look everything over to see if there are holes (which there always are) though, and try my best to fix them. It's great you think Sirius developed. It would be horrible if people thought he didn't change, because he was such a (sexy) bastard at first.

Emerald Eyes of Flame: I don't understand… (is confused) How can emerald eyes be flaming? Unless you mean those scary green fires from ghost movies. And now it's updated… just… 7 months afterwards. (hides)

Sui-chan: And MOAR you shall have. But yes, slowly. Patience is the key. Muahahahaha. I am evil and I will be killed by a superhero dropping a car on my house. Except, you know, all the superheroes are in the US.

Cookie Gestapo: Yup yup, I'm evil and no good, but eeewww, I'm not a pooper scooper! I can barely stand to pick up my dog's poop. Okay, okay, I do and I'm a good member of the community. But erm… I still don't like poop. And sorry, I didn't mean for it to be a cliff-hanger. It actually felt like the natural place to stop because it is the end of something and the beginning of something new. Hm… I sound like a fortune cookie.

Hawk Stout: I'm a greedy, greedy woman. 218 (or 230 now) reviews are not enough. I want MOAR! (sends subliminal messages). Well, unfortunately, the reason why Sirius is still alive isn't as romantic as the one you claimed, but has everything to do with his new werewolf status. I don't think it was explained sufficiently in the story. Maybe I'll have to fix it after the story's finished.

Hannio: I hope you'll like this chapter too. My writing style and form has changed so much that I really can't tell if people will like it anymore. At least it doesn't have as many grammar errors, I hope. That I'm hoping I've improved on.

RoxasIsReal13: (is embarrassed) That's probably because you've read all the best ones earlier. I'm sorry this took so long. It was actually the Chiyen part that gave me trouble. I'm finally coming back to the missions given out in the first chapter.

Kreoff210: You assume right! There's more. 3 chapters more after this, actually, though the last chapter will most likely be epilogue-like. I hope you'll be patient enough to wait that long and finish. (bows)

Crimson Decade: Gahh! (Goes into time machine and hands over tissues). Too late, I know, but at least now you would've gotten over your grief and finally, onto the happy stuff! Like the fact that Sirius is not dead. And yeah, I hate writing tragedies, though I know one day I'll want to write a story that doesn't have a fairy-tale ending. This one probably will, though.

Ice Dragon3: (Laughs nervously) I think the chapter'll have to be novel length (which it isn't) to make up for how long I don't update. Heh, Sirius and Remus are regular fools, like they're still seventeen or something. They suck at communication, no matter how good a tongue Remus has. I hope I haven't disappointed anyone with how Sirius survives, and it wasn't too anti-climactic.

THE sheep: Gosh, really? I admit that one's funnier and has less OOC, but this one's nearly finished and I'm sort of stuck in that one. I really don't know how long I want it to go on for, and so haven't been able to plot on ahead. I know little stuff, like Christmas, why Hogwarts was spared and those kinds of things, but I don't know how Harry and Draco will get together at all.

RegretfullyYours: Yikes! No heart attacks! I've seen them before and they're terrifying. I hope your love for SiriusxRemus haven't waned. And I promise that when this fic ends, I'll clearly mark it with a bit THE END. Hm… honestly, I do think I will only write three stories in this fandom. The two that I have now, and the sequel to this one. I'm moving into original work.

Nightshade218: Hey! In my defense, I left a note at the beginning too! Or were you too eager to get to the story? (Smirks, and then grovels) SOOORRRYYY for the late update!

Suicidal Button: (Runs screaming from sporks) Sirius and Remus and sex, oh my! Thank you so much! And seriousness is over-rated, and the Sirius-serious pun is overused but I simply can't help it. Aw… I hope you did and could wait for this next part.

Faery Goddyss: Wicked spelling! Thank you for such sophisticated reviews! My goal is always to improve and keep telling stories. And on one hand I think working at my own pace is good. On the other hand, I think I'm a bum for waiting so long. And hee hee, I actually like SiriusXRemus better, and also there are so many DH fan fiction out there that I wanted to write this one first, right? I'm a fan of both though.

My grudge against JKR is the epilogue. She RUINED my dreams! (Cries, sulks, emos). And yeah, I often have trouble finding something to read.

I've had trouble being in-character for kid!Draco and kid!Harry and I think they're really OOC, so it's a relief that they're cute. I mean, I've never seen them in the books and JKR doesn't actually have a lot of toddlers to get examples from either. And if you like Remus with a backbone, hopefully you'll love him in this chapter the most.

BabayBunny: It IS spring. Well, spring a year later. My finance is a little easier this time. Last year I had to work full time, hard core, and I think I died a little every day. Nah, I exaggerate, it wasn't that bad, but I'd hate to write when I'm mentally and physically exhausted and cranky. I think I'd just create bitter work. (nods) And oh I think DH isn't just in the background this chapter anymore, Harry admitted he's in LOVE!

Angelike Riddle: EVIL is what I strive to be. Muahahaha. Sirius was dying on that bed for a whole year, I guess, but he has a Will to Live, and so he has come back! And nope, this chapter certainly isn't depressing. It has kisses! Kisses can't be depressing… unless they lead to someone dying that is, or they're from a dementor.

HisBloodyRefuge: Deatheater!Sirius is dead and no-more… Would you still like this story? (Puppy-eyes). I know it has been a while, but hopefully you're still up to reading and I haven't been removed from everyone's alert lists for being a lazy bum…

PaddyWaddy: I keep my promises! I do! And 8 chapters is a lot when there are only 12 chapters in the story, really. I do hope enough happens to make it seem like an adventure as well as a romance, that it feels like the characters went on a journey both physically and mentally. And yes, Draco is the mirror kid. I laugh because everyone portrays him to be such a narcissist, and the mirror's a perfect super-power.

Trendyfishie89: That is SUCH a great name! Cute and catchie and even the numbers seem very design-y. The next chapter wasn't soon, but I hope you'll still be willing to read it.

DrOwNiNg In EbOnY: Your name is always hard to type, but definitely worth it. Send me tapes! Three copies please! Are you charging? And Sirius, dear, you aren't in these things because you two are sneaky. You like being on the verge of being caught but take pride in not getting caught. At least, that's how I've portrayed you in my other fanfic. If you do make a video, it'll just make it too easy, right? And poor Harry, Draco simply doesn't have the same Marauder ethics. And really Harry, you were never the brightest light bulb when it comes to these things. (laughs)

Irish-Mexican: I'll bet you wish now that you'd never found this fic, or found it after it's done. I'm sorry I'm a slow updater. I'll bet many people has given up already, and I wouldn't wish that fate on anyone. But I'm SO happy that it made you read into the night. It gives me such a feeling of accomplishment. And I'm glad you felt sad for Crouch, he was such a pathetic character. Ne, are you of age now? (waggles eyebrows) It's been more than a year, after all. And YES, you were my 200th reviewer, I'm so honored that anyone would notice these things.

I think I write okay, but really, if I was anywhere close to JKR, I'd be a millionaire too, which, you know, I'm totally not. I'm not even living off of writing, though I hope to do so one day. And I will cheer with you! SiriusxRemus 4EVA!

Jka1: Voldemort may be cunning, but he's no match for our Remus. (Nods sagely). Though I hope that part was convincing. Voldemort is such a perverted bastard, I totally didn't intend that. I'm glad you enjoyed the lemon though it wasn't supposed to be entirely happy. I hope this lives up to expectations.

Puinl: They're not so mushy in this chapter, but the true love is still there! If you squint! I've always thought if Sirius and Remus got together they'd be witty, James would be hen-pecked and DracoxHarry would be fighting all the time and alternating between angst and anger and LOVE. Muahahaha. Yeah, I totally agree that people love in different ways, and I'm glad I could find a way that fits. And yes, now they'll be together forever. And I think most of us here are romantics, right?

Sunflower Seeds: This time around? Who knows. I'm sorry, maybe it could be a form of self-advertisement, that I update so slowly and force you all to read my stories over and over again. Gosh, I feel sweaty now, even though I've finished the chapter. It's a lot of pressure.

Ora-shini-gi: They had one moment where they communicated everything, but their problems are still not solved! You've been such a loyal reviewer and I love you all so much. I hope to see people again, but I do have a feeling I'll lose a lot. Purely my own fault though… (Cries)

Rosemary's Granddaughter: Gasp! I LOVED Dumbledore! I loved that old man. Hm… I think 'I'm about to die' sex is actually one of the worst kinds. They're all giving and such, but there's something really sad about it that I'm sure everyone in the scene can sense. Readers too, though to us, hopefully it'd be beautiful as well. I prefer the possessive kind of rescue sex, myself.

Apus-Equuleus: Will you come back? You're the one I'm the most anxious to see, actually, since you've been reviewing all along and I'd cry.

I'm so glad the lemon wasn't disappointing, even if it was sad. I know a lot of people have sexy lemons for their first times but that was never what I wanted. As dominant and angry and possessive as Sirius is, I thought his love for Remus wasn't actually a possessive love, even if it was a little selfish. I just thought he needs Remus' love as well, and he couldn't be like Snape from this chapter, living with unrequited love. Sirius just loves a little bit differently. And Remus is just an idiot and a martyr. So I thought their first time shouldn't be ANYTHING like non-con. And it should mean the world to both sides and it's the moment when, yes, they are truly happy.

Yes, there will be a happy ending for this pair. This and the sequel are plotted out, but I think the people reading Harry Potter fan fiction are dwindling, so I wouldn't be surprised if my sequel is vastly unpopular. (scratches head).

Hm… I'd actually always found Snape somewhere between good and bad. And Voldemort just completely bad, though he is bad in a human way and not in a demonic way, which means there are still parts we can relate to, right?

WhiteWolfCub: Thanks for coming back! I was really nervous about the lemon, so I'm glad! And YES continuations. 3 more chapters to go! Cheers!

Aclytie: Oh, I'm sure my method fails in comparison to some of the possibilities you've come up with. And now you must feel guilty reccing my fic because I am so late! Muahahaha. Erm… I mean, yes, I know it's not something to be proud of. I hope I haven't made Remus react not strongly enough, or made it melodramatic, but you guys'll be the judge of that.

Lilia Black: Everyone's glad Sirius won't die. Then I've succeeded. And really, who comes to fan fiction to read tragedies? They'd be my heroes because I could never stand reading tragedies, especially in fan fiction. Well… I didn't update soon, but I did update, so that's half of your request, right?

Bluudyrabbitofportland: Well, your name is long but it's not hard to type at all! So no worries! You shouldn't thank me for updating. It should be a writer's responsibility to finish, right? And while I'm irresponsible in other ways, I'm always responsible to writing. No luck with scholarships, but I worked and so money isn't so much of a problem now. Thanks for your concern!

Rekahneko: Let's see if you have ESP and still think this story won't be abandoned. And yes, Sirius is rough but he has a gentle side too. I think on some levels, he is very frightened that he would lose the things he loved, just like Draco does right now, except Draco shows it more. Sirius in my version and the original had a bit of a bad childhood, and I think that does influence how he behaves as an adult, though he has grown up to be a very remarkable one, ne?

Jay: Then I've succeeded! Yay! I'm sure some people will think it was vulgar, but if there are people who like it, then I don't mind at all. Is it really your favorite? That makes my heart pound just a little faster. Thank you so much and I hope I don't disappoint!

SPEEDIE22: I'm greedy too! If you aren't too ticked off at my laziness, please review again! Thank you!

Trista: Ooh! You remembered that Remus being sire and submissive part? That'll definitely come up and be solved later. There'll be a bit on that in the next chapter too. And while this story is ¾ over, I promise I'll try my best to make the ending worth it. And then, if you guys are still interested, I'll write the sequel about Draco and Harry, though I can't guarantee how long it'll take. And Acks! You found Voldemort kind? I'll have to try harder then, I thought he was rather cruel. Hm…

Next Chapter: The Flame-Wreathed Onslaught.

Love, Mikril-dey


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